Ruined by You (12 page)

“You were a huge help with Lisa,” I said.

He chuckled, softly.

“I didn’t even say anything. You handled that whole thing, perfectly,” he said.

I shrugged. “I liked having you there,” I said. “It reminded me that I wasn’t alone.”

I looked down, and a strand of bright red hair fell in front of my face. Haden reached up and brushed it behind my ear. Tingles rifled through my body, like every other time he touched me. His fingers dipped under my chin, and lifted it until our eyes met. His eyes burned. For a second, the rest of the world faded into nothingness.

“You’re going to be just fine,” he said, softly. “You’re a stronger girl than you give yourself credit for.”
 

My lips went dry, so I licked them. His eyes darted down, and he inhaled a soft breath. The moment lasted an eternity. Then, he eased his eyes shut, and released a held breath. My hands tingled, now, for an entirely different reason than before.

“You better get in there,” he said, his voice coming out in a breath. “If they’re here, they might not be rehearsing for long.”

I nodded once, acknowledging that he was right. If I didn’t get myself out of that car, soon, I knew things were going to take a turn, and I didn’t know which direction I would be headed if they did. I leaned toward the door, and clumsily popped it open. I renewed myself with a deep breath, and climbed out of the car.

“Good luck,” Haden said, as I slid one foot out onto the pavement. “But, I don’t think you’re going to need it.”

I smiled back at him, and shut the door. I wanted him by my side, but he was right - I could do this. Facing the entrance, I blew out a deep breath, and set off to conquer my fears.

* * * * *

The entrance opened into a tiny hallway that led back into the depths of the Warehouse. The sound of music crashed from somewhere up ahead. It wasn’t the sound of a stereo - it was the sound of a band playing. Had I lucked out and arrived while they were still rehearsing? The good fortune invigorated me.

The sounds grew louder as I crept further down the hallway. The instruments fused together in an expert way--like they were all a part of one. Their music felt natural, effortless. I had no doubt it was the band I was looking for, even though I didn’t recognize the particular song they were playing.

Light poured into the end of the hallway from somewhere out of sight. They were there. I crept up and poked my head around the corner, trying to get a glimpse without being too intrusive.

The room beyond opened onto a huge sound stage. Four guys were on the stage, none of them looking much older than me. At the foot of the stage, was a lady in a navy blazer and matching skirt. She stood next to a guy who looked about the same age as me.

The four guys on stage each played their own instrument. The guy in front had an acoustic guitar. His mop of hair was a curled mess, and he had his back to the front of the stage while he faced another guitarist. The other guitarist was lost in the music. His eyes were closed while his fingers cranked out a solo. The bassist stood across from them. His head was shaved, and he rocked back and forth on his feet. His long fingers plucked steadily at the thick strings of the bass guitar. In the back, a chubby guy sat behind a massive drum kit. He had a baseball cap on, turned backwards. His hands were a blur of movement, but, somehow, the beat that came out was slow and effortless.

I stood, fixed in place, for a long time. I didn’t dare interrupt the magic they were creating. Another minute passed as the guitarist continued his solo. I wasn’t used to seeing someone just sit there and play like that. He wasn’t playing according to some script or sheet music - he was pouring his heart and soul into every note.

Then, the drums quieted even more. The rest of the band followed suit, and the only sound remaining was the slight twinge of the electric guitar. It echoed from the amp, as if by accident. The man with the curly hair and the acoustic guitar leaned in closer, to the other guitarist, ever so slightly, his face radiant, and his hands still strumming. Then, with one final strum, the electric guitarist hit a single note that echoed through the entire Warehouse.

A flood of emotions overcame me all at the same time. I knew that I had found exactly what I was looking for. Even having only watched them for a minute or two, I could feel the magic in the air, and I could feel the chemistry they created.

Without a single thought or reservation, my hands began clapping together, furiously. I stepped out from around the corner, whooping and applauding.

But the band hadn’t finished playing.

Just as I let cheers fly, the lead singer turned back to the mic and started singing. My shouting and yelling clashed against the lyrics he sang - but not for long. My voice died, stricken with horror, and the lead singer went quiet, too, shocked confusion twisting his face.

The music crashed in on itself as every head in the room shot death-stares in my direction. In the blink of an eye, the room turned from a magical haven, to a pit of chaos.

Somehow, my hands clapped, still, until those claps were the only sound echoing through the Warehouse.

* * * * *

“Who the fuck is this?” the electric guitarist screamed. “Who the hell let her in here?” His question was directed toward one of the two people at the foot of the stage.

My eyes shot between everyone. I must have looked like a deer caught in headlights. I wanted to turn and run as fast as my feet would carry me. But they were stuck in place. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t make a sound.

The two people at the end of the stage both looked at me. The man remained where he was, but the lady walked over to me, briskly, her eyes shooting worried looks back at the band.

“Don’t worry,” she said to them. “Keep practicing, everything’s fine. I’ll handle it.” She walked right up to me, and spoke in a hushed tone. “I don’t know who you are, but you better have a very good reason for being here,” she said.

“Let’s take five,” someone called out from behind her.

“We were in such a rhythm, I can’t believe this,” said the angry voice. “Figures that someone would come and mess everything up.”

My stomach twisted around itself.

“So?” the woman said. “Why are you here?”

I swallowed hard and tried to remind myself to be strong.

“Lisa Goldstein sent me,” I managed.

The woman’s eyes scrunched together as she studied me.

“Lisa sent you?” she said. She shook her head. “She would have called ahead of time - she doesn’t just send people somewhere unannounced.”

I cringed. “Actually, she did, just a bit ago,” I said. “I was supposed to call first and set up a meeting, but I decided to just swing by.”

The woman eyed me hard, the intensity in her stare was nearly overpowering. I wanted to run away. I wanted to get as far away from there as possible.

She studied me for what had to be the longest minute of my life.

“What’s your name?” she asked.

“M… Maggie,” I said.

“Maggie,” she repeated. “Are you the promoter that was looking to fill a show?” she asked, her tone softening. Her words confused me.
Promoter?

“I’m trying to find a band for a concert,” I said. My voice shook more than I had expected.

The woman stared at me, incredulously. Her hand flipped to the side after a moment.

“That’s it?” she said. “That’s all you’re doing? Just trying to find a band for a concert? Thought you’d stop by to see if we were interested?”

I shrugged my shoulders slowly, like a child chastised for doing something stupid.

“It’s for the Battle of the Bands out in Green Falls,” I said. “Scottie… I mean, the guy who is organizing it, asked for my help.”

Her eyes softened even more.

“You’re working with Scottie?” she asked, her tone changing.

I nodded.

“He’s trying to find someone to headline the Battle,” I said.

She rocked back on her heels, and her shoulders slouched. I could see her eyes working back and forth as she pieced things together.

“Is she still here?” I heard a voice call out from behind the woman. “Send her on her way, already. We have work to do.”

The woman spun on her heels, deliberately, and looked back over her shoulder. “Hold on, Seth,” she said.

That was when things got out of control.

“No, Stacey,
you
hold on,” the voice came again. “We can’t have people just walking in off the streets, interrupting our rehearsal.” Stomped footsteps drew nearer as he approached. He stopped only a foot from Stacey, his cheeks flushed. His eyes locked on me. “Listen, we don’t sign autographs or anything like that, when we’re rehearsing. So, just be on your way.”

I shook my head. “I’m not here for that,” I said, before Stacey interrupted me.

“Seth,” she said, sharply. “Can you rein your ego in for even a few minutes?”

“My ego?” he said, his voice nearly a shout. “
My
ego? Well, excuse me while I go put my ego in time out. We’ll have to see what the guitar has to say about it, though.” He sounded hysterical, like someone who was about to lose control.
 

“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to…”

“You didn’t mean to what?” he said, turning his attention back to me. “You didn’t mean to start your hoopin’ and hollerin’ right in the middle of our jam? Because you did a pretty good job of
that
.”

“I didn’t realize… I thought the song was over…”

Tears were welling behind my eyes, and my breath was coming in gasps. I needed to get out of there - soon.

“No, of course you didn’t realize,” he said. “Because you don’t know what the fuck you’re doing. Look at you. Are you here on a fieldtrip? Where’s your teacher at? Does he know you’ve wandered away from the other kids? Go on, get out of here, the grownups have work to do.”

With that, he slunk away. Stacey watched him for a second, before turning back to me. Her eyes were mortified, and were the only things that stopped me from bolting for the door. But I wasn’t going to last long.

“I’m sorry about that,” she said. She waved her hand, trying to find her words. “If you have a card you can give me, I’ll give you a call.” She let out a sigh. “Seth is… delicate.”

“No,” I said, shaking my head. “It’s fine. It’s clear they’re not interested. I don’t have a card, anyway.” I felt the first sting of wetness growing on the corner of my eye--I swiped my finger at it, quickly. “I should just get going,” I said.

She winced. “He’s like that to everyone,” she said.

“Sorry to have bothered you,” I said, before turning and running at full speed down the hallway.

By the time I made it to the exit door, warm tears were flooding down my cheeks, and the only pleasure I took was that I’d managed to hold them back long enough that no one saw.

Tears were flooding down my face as I ran out to the car. Haden had his eyes closed, and his head was swaying to the music, when I climbed in next to him. He looked over at me, and immediately turned off the radio.

“What’s happened?” he asked me, his voice panicked.

“Nothing, let’s just get out of here,” I said.

“Maggie, you’re crying,” he said, stating the obvious. “What happened in there? Is everything OK?”

I didn’t trust myself to speak. I wanted to be as far away as possible. Talking about it was only going to end with me being even more of a mess. And, while I appreciated the concern, I wasn’t ready for him to see me like that.

I shook my head. “Everything’s fine,” I said. “I’m just... I fucked things up...” I worked my mouth, trying to say more, but I couldn’t.

I could feel Haden’s eyes on me. Didn’t he understand that I just needed him to drive? I flitted my eyes over to him, unable to hold my look for long. Concern flooded through his face. He looked as pained as I felt. Something about that wasn’t right, but it was comforting.

With a swift motion, he threw the car into reverse, and pulled out of the parking lot. He put his foot on the pedal and sped away. I sobbed for a few more minutes, doing my best to hide it with my hands. But I was certain he noticed.

Haden didn’t say anything for a long while. I could sense the questions he wanted to ask. I knew that I owed him an explanation, but I was grateful he didn’t pressure me to give one.

“I don’t think that band is going to work out,” I said, finally. We were already halfway back to Green Falls. “I’ve messed everything up.”

He glanced at me from the corner of his eye.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked.

I thought for a second, and then blew out a sharp breath.

“When I went in, they were playing something so magical,” I began. “I hadn’t heard the song… I didn’t know how it went. But it was so good.”

I frowned, remembering it. Remembering how quickly the situation had gone from amazing to awful. It reminded me of another time in my life - another reminder of how quickly life could fall apart.

“I thought the song was over,” I continued. “And, they had done such an good job, it only made sense that I give them a round of applause. Because, that’s what you’re supposed to do. Isn’t it?” A painful lump lodged itself in my throat, and it hurt to swallow. Dignity is funny like that, I guess. “Well, as it turned out, the song wasn’t quite done.” I looked up at Haden. Pain creased the corner of his eyes as he glanced at me. I shook my head. “It was awful. I ruined everything.”

We drove on for another moment before Haden said anything. I wondered what he was thinking. I wondered if he thought I was as crazy as I felt. There was no possible way that he would have made the same mistake. In fact, if he had been in there with me, he probably would have stopped me from making it in the first place. But he hadn’t been. He had trusted me to handle the situation - just like Scottie had trusted me to handle it - and I had let them both down. I was such a fool.

“I’m sure it wasn’t
that
big a deal,” he said. “Bands don’t get upset when fans cheer them on.”

“They weren’t expecting any fans,” I said, hysterically. “It was supposed to be a
closed
rehearsal.” I didn’t bother wiping away the tears anymore. I didn’t have a tissue, and I let them run freely. “I should have just listened to you in the first place. We should have waited. This whole thing could have been avoided.”