Suddenly, I recoil into the bed as the doctor’s hands slip around to the sides of my neck. He notices and quickly stops and a look of understanding passes between the two of us.
“Sorry,” I say.
“Erin, you have nothing to be sorry for, my dear. That was a perfectly common reaction.”
Even though I love this doctor’s bedside manner, I am still nervous and scared about this entire situation. I reach up and grab Adam’s hand. And when he squeezes it back I turn my gaze back to the doctor.
“You’re going to be in some pain for several days, and it is going to take some time for all of the bruising to heal. It appears to me you’re going to be in very good hands, so I am going to keep you here tonight for observation and if everything goes as I think it will, I will release you in the morning. Sound okay?”
“Yes, sir.” I whisper.
“Your voice will be back to normal in no time, too. Just take it easy at home and try not to overdo it.”
I nod.
“There is one more thing I would like to talk to you about if you’re up for it. It will only take a minute and then I will have Julie come in and give you something for your pain and to help you sleep.”
“Okay.”
“You’re a survivor, Erin, and I believe you know this. I also want you to know that unfortunately there are many women who have walked in your shoes and there are programs out there for domestic abuse survivors. I am going to leave some pamphlets with your discharge papers tomorrow and I encourage you to take advantage of one or all of them.”
I squeeze Adam’s hand and close my eyes to try to keep the tears that want to fall at bay. When the doctor gets up to leave he lightly shakes Adam’s hand then stands at the foot of my bed, gently placing his hands onto my feet as if to comfort me.
“Always remember, Erin. You survived,” he says before exiting the room just as the nurse comes bustling back in.
“I am not even going to tell you to leave Mr. Payne because I know you’re not going to, but I am going to ask you to let her rest,” Julie tells Adam as she inserts the pain medication into my IV.
“I appreciate that, Julie.” Adam tempts to sweet talk her.
“Yeah, I bet you do,” she says. “Take care of yourself, dear.”
Julie attempts to hide her smile as she starts towards the door. After she leaves, I turn toward Adam as the pain meds start to kick in. As I close my eyes, I feel him slip in bed next to me... or at least I dream that he does.
Chapter Seventeen
Adam
Anger isn’t even a strong enough word to describe how I am feeling as I lie here and hold Erin.
When Shelby called me frantically and told me what happened, I couldn’t even think straight. I could hardly understand a word she was saying through her screaming and crying. My only concern was to get to Erin as soon as I could. When I finally got to the hospital and saw Erin just lying there and not moving with bruises forming on the side of her face and Joel’s handprints around her neck, I felt like someone had reached inside and pulled my damn heart out.
And then guilt set in as I paced the floor in the waiting room. How could I have been so careless as to leave the garage open when I left this morning? I left the girls completely unprotected. I have been letting Muppet stay with Lucy at Shayne and Luke’s house after she begged to get to play with him more often, and I didn’t even think to bring him home to stand guard. How in the hell I made it through this day is beyond me. If it wasn’t for Luke and Bubba telling me Antonio had already gotten in touch with Big Neil, I would have been out looking for Joel myself.
And having to lie to Sierra about why her mom isn’t home about ripped my heart in half. The only thing I am thankful for is that she has no clue about Joel, and I intend to keep it that way. Who the fuck does he think he is? And how in the hell could any man do this kind of damage to a woman? He better pray like a motherfucker that the cops find him before I do, because if I get my hands on that sick son of a bitch I am going to kill him.
It’s clear that Joel is here for revenge and blames Erin for his drug addiction and for the fact that he has spent the last four years in prison because he got busted dealing. When Antonio told me about the drugs it didn’t surprise me at all. The first thing that came to my mind is, how in the hell I am going to tell Erin about this? She is going to flip out even more. Then Jen showed up at the hospital and sat in the waiting room with me. She’s the one who convinced me to wait to tell Erin about Joel and his habitual cocaine habit.
I leaned my head back against the wall in that waiting room and prayed like I have never prayed before for all kinds of things. I prayed for my girl to come back to me, and I prayed she wouldn’t drift back into her shell, and I prayed that Joel would be found soon. I don’t know shit about drugs as I have never done them, but I know from seeing and hearing things that you’re not the same person when you’re high on that shit. I almost got sick to my stomach just thinking about any of that being around Sierra. Now all I want to do is lock my girls in the house and keep them both safe from the fucked up world.
I hate this fucking hospital. The last time I was here I received the worst news of my entire life. It was the day I lost my mother. I remember it so well. When you lose someone you love, you feel like it’s the end of the world. I would do anything to have my mom here with me right now. I am a grown man who finally found the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with and I can’t even share my happiness with her. Life can be so cruel to the kindest people in this world.
The sound of the door opening takes me out of my memories and when I look up and see Shayne standing in the doorway it’s like a sign coming from my mother that she knew Shayne would be exactly who I need right now.
Slipping my arm carefully from underneath Erin and disconnecting myself from her warm body, I meet Shayne in the doorway and we take a seat in the waiting area just outside of Erin’s room.
“You’re a sight for sore eyes, Shayne, but what in the hell are you doing here so late? It’s after midnight, for Christ’s sake.”
“Adam, you’re my family and neither Luke nor I could sleep, anyway. This is where I need to be. I knew you wouldn’t leave her. You must be going through hell right now and I just didn’t want you to be alone.”
God, what would I do without my Shayne? Even though technically we’re cousins by blood, she is my sister and my best friend.
“You’re the best, you know that, right?” I nudge her shoulder with mine.
“Yeah, I know.” She nudges mine back.
I place my hands on my knees. “I don’t know which is worse for me right now, Shayne. The horror that my girl is lying in that bed with bruises all over her face and that prick’s handprints around her neck, or the undeniable fact that I want to kill him. To top it all off, I feel like it is all my fault this happened.”
“Adam, you can’t blame yourself for this. He would have gotten to her one way or the other. Don’t even think that.” She places her hand on my shoulder. “We all want to find him and we will. We need to stay focused on Erin right now. How is she holding up, anyway?”
“Better than I thought, actually. She tries to be so damn strong Shayne, but I finally told her today she doesn’t have to be strong all the time. God, I feel so fucking helpless right now! That’s the love of my life lying in there right now, and I can’t do a damn thing to help her!”
“Don’t say that. You’re the best thing that has happened to her. She is so in love with you. You have made her believe in herself again. Don’t beat yourself up over this.”
When I tilt my head and look at my cousin she has tears in her eyes. With everything that she has been through herself over the last several years, and despite the fact that she is pregnant, here she sits with me in the middle of the night.
“I need to get back in there with her, okay?” I stand up and help Shayne do the same. “How was Sierra tonight?”
“She is fine. She thinks Erin fell down the stairs. We have prepared her so she knows her mom will have some bruises on her face. Kids are a lot more resilient to things like this, so don’t worry about her. She will be fine.”
I lug my cousin into my arms and kiss the top of her head.
“Get your butt home and get some rest. Thank you for coming. The doctor said Erin will be able to go home in the morning since nothing was broken, so can you bring Sierra home after school?”
“Of course we will,” she says as she pulls away and picks up her purse.
“Adam?”
“Yeah?”
“They will find him, you know.”
I nod and wait until Shayne gets on the elevator before I return to Erin’s room. I lay back down and inhale her sweet scent, finally allowing my body to succumb to sleep.
“Good morning,” Erin rasps, repressing a yawn.
“Morning,” I return. “How are you feeling?”
“My throat doesn’t hurt as much.”
She sits up in bed and the sleeve of the hospital gown falls down her shoulder, exposing her creamy white skin. She goes to pull it back up and I step in and pull it back down. She gives me a look as I lean down and gently kiss her uncovered skin. When I reach the spot at the side of her neck that is bruised and shows Joel’s fingerprints, I lightly kiss her there, too. I want to erase every trace of him from her mind and let her know that no matter what, she will always be the most exquisite woman in the world to me. However, before I can tell her anything, in walks a new nurse followed by a male and a female police officer. I glance up at the clock on the wall and see it’s only seven thirty in the morning.
“Good morning, Erin. My name is Lori and I will be your nurse until your release this morning. And you must be Adam?” She directs her attention at me.
“Good morning,” Erin and I say in unison.
“The police would like to talk to you about what happened, are you up for that, Erin?” Lori questions.
“I am, however I need a few minutes if you don’t mind?” Erin states calmly to the police.
“Sure thing, Ms. McIntyre. We will be waiting outside, just take your time.”
They swiftly exit and Lori turns to Erin.
“I just want to check all your vitals again, honey.”
I excuse myself to go to the bathroom while the nurse finishes up with Erin and when I walk back into the room Lori is helping Erin out of the bed.
“I can help her,” I say, immediately stepping to her side.
“I can walk just fine, Adam. I just need to use the bathroom.”
She steadies herself as she stands and enters the bathroom a little wobbly.
“Her vitals all checked out fine. And she seems to be holding up very well considering everything that has happened to her,” Lori says compassionately.
“Yes, she is. I just hope those cops have some good news for her.”
I sigh because I have a suspicion they haven’t found him, because if they did, I know Luke or Antonio would have called me no matter what time it was.
“I do too, son. Now I will go get those discharge papers started and the doctor will be in as soon as the police leave. I also asked if she wanted any breakfast and she said she wasn’t hungry. I do request that you encourage her to eat, especially while she is taking the pain meds the doctor will prescribe for her.”
“Yes, ma’am. I will make sure she eats. You have my word on it.”
“She’s very lucky to have you, Adam. Take good care of her,” she says as she closes the door behind her.
Suddenly I hear a scream from the bathroom. I rush inside to find Erin standing in front of the sink with tears streaming down her face. She is shaking wildly as she stands there and looks at herself in the mirror. Damn it, why didn’t I think about her reaction to seeing herself for the first time? I am behind her in an instant and turn her body so she is facing me. She lays her head onto my chest and I just stand there stroking her long, silky hair.
“Baby, look at me.”
She shakes her head no.
“Yes, look at me. You are by far the most beautiful woman in this entire world. I won’t sugarcoat things for you. I told you last night to let it out when you need to, but don’t shut me out. I love you way too much to not look at you.”
“I look so terrible, Adam,” she says through her tears.
“I don’t know what to say to you. I really don’t.”
“You don’t have to say anything.” She lifts her head and looks at me. I feel so helpless right now. “You being here with me is all I need.”
We are interrupted yet again by Shelby coming through the door.
“Oh, Erin. I am so sorry.”
Erin and I separate as she walks into her sister’s arms.
“It’s not your fault, Shelby. It’s no one’s fault but Joel’s, and I don’t want to hear either one of you blaming yourselves ever again,” Erin says harshly, looking back and forth between Shelby and me as she speaks.
“Adam, thank you so much for calling me last night when she woke up. You have no idea how much I appreciate everything,” Shelby states as she helps Erin back into bed. “I am sorry I wasn’t here when you woke up, but someone had to be at the house when the cops were investigating. They had so many questions for me so I went with them. I… I am so sorry I didn’t hear anything, and then when I saw what he was doing to you I tr... tried to get my legs to move to stop him but they wouldn’t go. I just stood there for I don’t know how long Erin and watched him hit you and finally I screamed and that is when he looked up and ran out the door. I am so sorry. Please forgive me. Please,” Shelby’s voice breaks as it appears that the events of the previous day finally hit her. She sounds so frustrated with herself.
I silently let myself out of the room and lean my head against the door as I close it. I clench my hands into fists and close my eyes. Even though I shouldn’t be feeling this way because of all the violence Erin has had to endure in her life, I can’t help but want to bash that motherfucker’s head in for what he has done.
I push myself off of the door and take a seat in the chair up against the wall and dial the number to the one person who will help me find him and take care of him before the cops do.
************
Erin is completely passed out and soft, adorable little snores are coming from her as I pull into my garage. Shelby went to pick up Erin’s pain pill prescription for us, as Erin just wanted to get home. Hating to wake her but knowing that I have to, I gently pull the hair away from her face. She stirs and opens her eyes.
“I never thought I would be happy to see the inside of your garage, or that bright red tool box thing that sticks out like a sore thumb,” she smiles faintly, pointing at my toolbox in the corner.
“What? I am a builder, you know. Are you telling me you don’t like my tools?” I tease.
“Well I am kind of partial to your hammer and your nails,” she smirks, reaching over and stroking my dick through my jeans.
“Jesus Christ, woman! You just got out of the hospital. As much as I would love to get out my hammer and pound those nails, I am putting your sexy ass to bed.”
She crosses her arms over her chest and angles herself to reach for her door handle to get out.
“Here, let me help you, babe.” I cut the engine and jog around to her side and help her out of the truck.
“That hammer better be ready later tonight , because I know something that needs a good pounding.”
She stalks past me. What the hell? I knew there was a naughty girl inside of her and I fucking love it. So does my dick apparently, since I have to stand there for several minutes calming his ass down because all he can think about is the fact that he’s going to be the one doing the pounding.