Reclaiming Conversation (56 page)

self-reflection and,
83

and thinking about the past,
75

voter turnout and,
314

weak ties and,
297

work meetings and,
259
,
261

Facebook zone,
72
–74,
185

FaceTime (app),
105
,
139
,
140

face-to-face conversation,
3
,
4
,
7
,
13
,
16
–17,
25
,
35
,
42
,
43
,
139
,
189
,
246
,
317

apologies and,
32
–35,
265
,
267

breakups and,
25

in classrooms,
7
,
48

disagreements and,
103
,
127
–31,
195

emotional bonding and,
23

empathy and,
165
,
170
–71

in family,
121
,
127
–31

leadership culture and,
272

text messages and,
140
–41

at workplace,
15
,
29
,
48
,
55
,
251
–53,
288

Falk, Adam,
247

family,
103
–36

checking location of family members,
130
–31,
134
–35

community and,
114

conflict and problems in,
29
,
103
,
105
,
121
,
126
–31,
169

conversation in,
105
–7,
118
,
121
,
127
–31,
136

friends as,
142
–43

phones at mealtimes with,
42
,
47
,
104
,
109
,
110
,
112
–15,
118
–21,
284
,
345

social media use in,
112

stress and,
117
–18

television and,
111
–12,
115

texting used for difficult conversations in,
105
,
127
–31

see also
parents and children

Fear of Missing Out (FOMO),
145
,
146
–47

feedback and tracking devices,
89
,
90
–91,
93
–96,
99
,
306

fiction, literary, and empathy,
69
,
111

field trip (case study of father's being distracted on phone during),
122
–23,
124
,
125

fieldwork, analogy with live lecture,
241

Find My Friends (app),
134
–35,
304

Fitbit,
90
–91

flirtation,
178
,
179
,
182
,
188
,
190

flow,
73
–74

focus,
219
,
220
,
260
–61,
264

see also
attention and concentration

forgiveness, importance of face-to-face meeting for,
32
,
169

Foucault, Michel,
305
,
306

Franklin, Benjamin,
90

Freedom (app),
215

Freud, Sigmund,
80

friction-free,
179
–80,
293
,
356

friends, friendship,
136
,
137
–76

attention in,
150
,
154
,
160

being “on call” for,
158
–61

being on phone when with,
154
–56

best, children's view of,
163

comfort, consolation, and support in,
152
,
155
,
156
,
172

contractual notions in,
167

as family,
142
–43

and fear of missing out,
145
,
146
–47

funny moments and,
174

generations and technology in,
139
–42

hoarding of,
167
,
174

ignoring phone when with,
156

image sharing among,
35
–36,
37
,
151
–52

and monitoring phone use,
147
,
154

online,
164
,
167
,
172
–73,
174

other-directedness and,
145
–46

past history and,
168
,
169

phones as disrupting conversations of,
157
–58

physical closeness in,
140

“real” conversations of,
174

reinforcement,
174

second chair and,
10
,
11
,
235
–36

and sharing goals of self-realization,
175

and talking about what's on phones,
150
–52

technologies and,
139
–42,
152

texting and,
144
–48

true,
174
–75

“What do you want in a friend?” exercise,
163

“Who has my back?,”
163

gambling, analogies with life online,
72
–73,
74
,
234

games, computer,
see
computer games

Gardner, Howard,
323
,
324

Gasser, Urs,
222

gay adolescents,
112

Gchat,
34
,
103
,
105
,
127
,
193
,
195
,
202
,
203
–5

student collaboration and,
244
–45

generations,
12
–14,
27
–28

compact between,
359

friendship and technology and,
139
–42

Gladwell, Malcolm,
297
–98

Glass Bead Game, The
(Hermann Hesse),
221

global climate change, difficulties of conversation about,
16
,
300
,
310
,
311

Gmail,
305
,
327

Goldilocks effect,
21
,
29
,
202
,
203
,
265

Google,
19
,
74
,
104
,
219

cafeterias at,
274

Docs,
244

*“garages” at,
320

Gchat, see Gchat

Glass,
168
–69,
170

Gmail,
305
,
327

privacy and,
306
,
313
,
315
–16,
327

Google jockeying,
218

GPS,
303
,
304
,
306

grazing, attentional,
222
–23

Habermas, Jürgen,
332

Happiness Tracker (app),
95
–96,
99

Harvard Divinity School,
233

Harvard University,
211
,
243

MOOCs,
228
,
229
,
233

Hayles, Katherine,
217
–18,
219
,
221

Hesse, Hermann,
221

Hill, Anita,
303

hiring employees,
45
–46

Holbrooke School (pseudonym),
3
,
5
–6,
7
,
68
–70,
71
–72,
161
–65,
323

Hoover, J. Edgar,
302

hospitalization,
135
,
136

hoteling,
48
–49,
269

Huffington, Arianna,
326

hurting others' feelings, in middle school,
162
,
164
,
165
–66

hyper attention,
217
–21,
222
,
227

image sharing,
35
–36,
37
,
151
–52

imagination,
62
,
64
,
65
,
66
,
71
,
218
,
317

Incredibles, The
(motion picture),
288

information and data,
116
,
119
,
151
,
232

databases and,
224

emails and,
264

in medicine,
224
,
282

narrative and,
222
–23

privacy and,
301
,
306
,
310
–15,
327
,
328
–29

romance and,
192
,
193
,
203

searches for,
224
–25,
306
–8,
312
,
313
,
315
–16

valuing and overvaluing,
354
–55

information silos,
50

in-person conversation,
see
face-to-face conversation

Instagram (app),
112
,
117
,
138
,
139
,
140
,
152
,
172

intellectual serendipity, during collaboration,
245

intelligence, meaning of word,
51
–52

Internet,
85
,
86
,
240

advertising and,
307
,
308

as hindrance to life,
115
,
116

information searches on,
224
–25,
306
–8,
312
,
313
,
315
–16

politics and,
293
-316;
see also
politics

privacy and, see privacy

time on, as solitude,
61
,
74
–75

weak ties and,
297

Internet Explorer,
304

interruptions,
35
–38,
41
,
44
–45,
53
,
68
,
286
,
321

experienced as connections,
37
,
125

intimacy,
4
,
7
,
12
,
50
,
158
,
175
,
180
,
346

collaboration and,
246

Invisible Children, Inc.,
294
,
295
.
296

iPads,
55

in classrooms,
72
,
216
–17

in meetings,
257

Iran:

hostage crisis in,
15

uprising in,
297

Jackson, Daniel,
239
–40

Jackson, Samuel L.,
339
–40

Jobs, Steve,
55

journaling,
82
,
83
,
85
,
88
–89

with 750 Words,
90
–91,
93

judges, conversation among,
263
–64

Kafka, Franz,
67

Kahneman, Daniel,
245
–46

Kassirer, Jerome P.,
224

Kelly, Kevin,
349

Kismet (sociable robot),
341
,
342
–44

Koller, Daphne,
231
,
236

Kony, Joseph,
293
,
294
–95,
296
,
297
,
298

Lane, Robert,
183

leadership,
77
–78,
271
–72,
274

learning:

grazing and,
222
–23

relationship with teacher and,
231
–32

see also
education

lectures,
74
,
215
,
228
,
231
,
232
,
234
–35,
236
,
237
–38,
241
,
242

Lévinas, Emmanuel,
342

library books and “mindspace,”
302
,
303
,
304
,
310

lightbulb moments,
76

Linux,
312
–13

listening,
71
–72,
109
–10,
118
,
129
–30,
161
–62,
163
,
165
,
357
,
359

to oneself,
98

literary fiction and empathy,
69
,
111

loneliness,
23
,
65
,
265
,
286
–87,
346

Loopt (app),
304

love,
246

falling in,
180
,
189

see also
romance

machines,
173

advice (personal) from,
355

conversations through,
16
–17,
293
–316,
338

conversations with,
16
–17,
50
–52,
337
–61

empathy and,
338
,
340
,
347

with faces,
342

fourth chair and,
16
–17,
50
–52,
337
,
338
,
359

psychotherapy through,
347
–48,
351

Siri,
50
–51,
337
,
339
–40,
346
–47,
348
,
357

treating people as,
345
–46

with voices,
341
–42

see also
robots