Reckless Destiny (23 page)

She stirred and stretched and sighed. Her unconsciously seductive movements aroused him instantly. The need in him pulled tight, then blazed through him like a spark to dry grass. He wanted her, more than he had ever wanted any woman in his life.

She yawned, then sat up, and when she looked at him in the shadows a gasp escaped her.

“It’s me, Cady. Don’t be afraid.”

“Kane,” she said softly, her voice husky from sleep.

She let out a long breath, then relaxed and rubbed her eyes like a sleepy child. She pushed her loose, heavy hair behind her shoulders and stood up.

“Is everything all right? Are you all right?”

“Fine.”

“What happened?”

“Nothing much. We gave chase but couldn’t find any trace of them. I suspect it was just an Apache show, a gesture of defiance to let us know they’re still out there.”

“Will they come back?”

He shrugged. “There’s no way to tell. I’ll send out a patrol when it gets light.”

She nodded as she let out a shuddering breath.

“The danger’s over for now. Don’t be scared, Cady.”

“I’m not.” She answered a little too quickly, a shade too confidently.

“You’re not a very good liar.” With one step, Kane stood in front of her and gently lifted her chin with his knuckle. She was forced to meet his gaze, and he saw the remnants of fear that clouded her eyes and took the color from her normally rosy cheeks.

“Why would I lie?” she asked.

“That’s a good question.”

He just wasn’t sure whether she was hoping to deceive herself or him. The real question was why she
would even try to hide her feelings from him. Only a fool wouldn’t be afraid.

“Let’s just say I’m glad you’re back,” she said.

“I’m sorry I woke you.”

“I was tired.” Her lashes lowered as she looked down sheepishly.

“Tell me why you didn’t stay with the Wexlers.”

She glanced up quickly. “I know that was an order, but I-I wanted to be here, close to my things. And if anything happened, if you were hurt or—” Her voice caught, forcing her to stop.

She whirled around then, but not before the candle caught the gleam of tears in her eyes.

“Cady, what is it?” He turned her gently to face him. “Were you afraid for me?” he asked softly.

She started to shake her head, then hesitated and nodded. Her eyes were huge in her pale face.

He let out a deep, shuddering breath. It had been a long time since someone had cared whether he lived or died. Whether he came home in one piece—or didn’t come home at all.

The tenderness swirling inside him refused to be contained any longer. He couldn’t hold back the flood of feelings that had rained down on him since he had walked through the door and seen her, his beautiful brave Cady, waiting for him.

Kane lowered his mouth to hers. Anticipation made his breathing quicken, the exquisite fullness of her lips set him on fire. Her soft moan of contentment put him over the edge of rational thought.

He needed to feel her naked against him, he wanted to hold her and kiss her and make the ugliness go away, he wanted her with a desire he had never known before.

With shaky fingers, he worked at the buttons on her blouse even as he kept his mouth on hers. He couldn’t
bear to pull away, not even long enough to expose her satin skin to his touch.

She reached behind to undo the fastenings of her split skirt and let it drop to the floor. He pushed the blouse from her shoulders as she stepped from the pool of material at her feet. In seconds, her chemise and pantalettes were gone and she stood before him naked.

He stared at her, branding her loveliness in his mind. She held herself proudly before him.

“You’re so beautiful I can hardly believe you’re real, and you’re here, with me.”

“I’m very real, and there’s nowhere else on earth I’d rather be than here, with you.”

Nestled between her breasts was the ring he’d given her, suspended from a string around her neck. He lifted the gold circle and started to pull it over her head, but she stopped him with a light touch.

She placed her hand on his. “Don’t take it off.”

He smiled at her and placed a kiss in her palm. When he heard her draw in a sharp breath, he glanced up at her, noticing her rapid breathing and the smoky look of passion in her eyes.

She rested her hands on his chest. The feeling was so soft and delicate, Kane thought he’d go out of his mind. He could barely draw enough air into his lungs. When she slipped her hands up around his neck, he wrapped his arms around her, hungrily holding her close as he enjoyed the sensation of her bare skin against his.

Kane had survived a lot in his life and had cheated death more than once, but one thing he knew: If he didn’t have Cady soon, he would die.

He bent slightly and placed an arm behind her knees and lifted her, walked the few steps to his cot, and placed her gently on the blanket. Before joining her, he
quickly shrugged out of his wool uniform pants, stretched out beside her, and pulled her close.

Cady wondered if this was all a dream. She’d had so many, and she always awakened alone and full of longing. She curved a hand around his strong neck, then pulled him to her for a kiss filled with all her pent-up yearning. His moan of pleasure sounded real enough. She nudged his lips apart and stroked the inside of his mouth. His arms tightened with restrained passion, even as the hard ridge of his desire pressed against the juncture of her thighs.

Kane looked at her with such hungry intensity that she knew this was real. He lowered his lips to her breast. A bolt of pleasure shot through her, clear down to her toes, and she knew she was wide awake, held in the arms of the man she loved. Unbridled happiness filled her until she thought she couldn’t possibly hold any more. She gave herself up to the tingles of pleasure as he laved her nipple with his tongue until she thought she’d go mad. Then he lifted his mouth, but only long enough to move to her other breast and suckle it the same way.

Cady was frantic from the pressure building within her. When he slid his hand down her belly to nestle between her thighs, she opened for him gladly. He slipped a finger into her moistness and she gasped.

“Kane, I want you,” she whispered fiercely.

“Is that an order?” He smiled at her.

“Oh, yes!”

“This will be one order it will be my pleasure to carry out.”

He raised up and positioned himself between her legs. When he looked into her eyes, all traces of humor were gone. Cady saw only a haunted expression and a hunger so intense she knew it matched her own.

“Please, captain,” she whispered as he slid into her waiting warmth.

Sheer contentment welled inside her, creating a tender ache. When he began to move slowly, something else took root and started to build. A heat that surpassed anything she’d experienced in the desert glowed in her belly and radiated outward.

He increased his pace, and the embers within her burst into flame. But still there was no freedom from the tension he nurtured. With exquisite caring, he kissed her, then lifted himself up and took his weight on his arms as he thrust into her harder and faster. The blaze he’d created inside her burned brighter and hotter until finally she cried out his name.

Her release came in a flare of brilliant white light, a fireball as hot as the Arizona sun.

Above her, Kane tensed, the tendons in his arms corded as he braced himself. He threw his head back and groaned as he shuddered from the force of his pleasure. Tears filled Cady’s eyes at the joy she felt, for she was the one who had given him this powerful release.

Kane lowered himself, resting his weight on his forearms as he kissed her nose. Then he rolled to the side and gathered her against him.

Cady snuggled into his warmth, loving the smell of his skin and the feeling of closeness being in his arms brought her. As she rested her cheek on his chest, his hair tickled her cheek. She suppressed a smile as she waited for him to say something.

But within minutes, she heard and felt his even breathing that told her he’d fallen asleep. Disappointment flooded her. With an effort, she pushed it away, for she knew he must be exhausted after everything that had happened today.

She’d try to be patient. After all, she knew he cared for her. He had just proved it to her with the tenderness of his possession.

Tomorrow was time enough to hear him say he loved her.

The next morning when Cady awoke
, Kane was gone. She tried not to let it bother her. After all, he was preoccupied with renegade Apaches, and the welfare of every man, woman, and child in the fort depended on him. Still, a part of her had expected him to hold her in the dawning light the way he had in the darkness the night before.

“Patience, Cady,” she scolded. “Give the man time.” But patience was not one of her strengths.

She picked up her hand mirror from the dresser and checked her appearance before school. She wasn’t sure if the children should gather for lessons, considering the scare with the Apaches the previous day, but she would be ready if Kane said it was all right.

Looking at her reflection, she said, “A good soldier’s wife does not act without thought. A good soldier’s wife follows orders and restrains herself.”

Cady wrinkled her nose and sighed. She was trying very hard, but she wasn’t sure she had the makings of a
good soldier’s wife. All she had in her favor was her love for Kane and her determination to be the best wife she could be.

She left her quarters to look for him. After searching in vain everywhere in the fort she could think of, Cady finally went into the mess hall. Betsy Wexler was there, trying to get the upper hand over a rowdy group of children. “Excuse me, Bart,” Betsy was saying, with a barely controlled edge of anger in her voice. “Please don’t jump off the table. You’ll hurt yourself.”

“No, ma’am,” he said stoutly. “I can jump from higher’n that there table.”

“Still, I must ask you not to do it. What if everyone here jumped off the table?”

A lively sparkle gleamed in Bart’s hazel eyes. “We could have us more fun than a flea in a doghouse.”

Cady walked over to the other woman, who looked ready to throttle the boy, and put a comforting hand on her shoulder. Betsy heaved a relieved sigh.

Then Cady frowned at Bart. “You know better than to behave like a ruffian in my schoolroom. Please take a seat.”

“Yes’m,” Bart said. He pulled out the bench closest to him and sat.

She glanced at the rest of the group, who hadn’t noticed her entrance. Martha Halleck, reddish-brown braids flying behind her, ran after Polly Chase and, when she caught the younger girl, squealed, “You’re it!” Emily Stanton smiled coyly at John Eagle as she blinked her dark blue eyes and twirled a black curl around her finger. R. J. glared at the two of them, then slapped John on the back, whereupon a wrestling match ensued.

Cady clapped her hands and said in a loud voice, “Children, please take your seats. On the double!”

She might not be the best army wife there ever was, but she was picking up the language and she had learned how to use it in her classroom.

The children stopped their shenanigans and sat down immediately.

Betsy brushed a loose strand of graying hair away from her flushed face. “I’d like to know what magic you use to do that. I’ve been trying to get them to listen to me for fifteen minutes.”

“It’s not magic, it’s the voice. Takes time to develop just the right tone.”

“I don’t plan to be here long enough to acquire the skill.”

Cady smiled sympathetically. “Sorry I’m late. I was looking for Kane to see if it was safe to have school today. I never found him.”

“He took a patrol out first thing this morning to see what those devil Indians are up to, if anything.”

Cady stifled first a stab of fear and then the envy she felt that this woman knew more about her husband’s comings and goings than she did. “I see. Then I suppose I’d better check with the officer in charge to see if we should have school or not.”

“Oh, I’m sure it’s all right,” Betsy said quickly. “If anything happens, there will be plenty of warning. Besides, the children are better off following their normal routine. It will take their minds off what’s going on.”

Cady agreed but still felt she should get permission. Just before she could voice the thought, Bart Grimes toppled off the end of the bench, as the three children beside him shifted suddenly and shoved him. A chorus of giggles followed his undignified thump. Then the flush of embarrassment on his face gave way to anger and he jumped up and yanked on Martha’s pigtail.

From then on, all Cady’s thoughts focused on restoring and keeping order. She never noticed when Betsy Wexler slipped away, but after she had separated Bart and Martha and calmed the shrieking girl down, the major’s wife was gone. Cady proceeded to keep the restless group busy.

When she had everyone back in their seats and all eyes were upon her, she said, “You all remember we were talking about the events in history that led up to America’s War of Independence?” When the majority of heads bobbed up and down in assent she continued, “Today I want to tell you about the Boston Tea Party.”

Emily Stanton stared at her. “They had tea before they had the war?”

Cady shook her head and told the children about the incident.

When she finished, R. J. asked, “What did the colonists do about those ships in the harbor?”

On the bench to Cady’s left, Polly Chase pinched little Bobby Armstrong, who sat beside her. The youngster yelled “Ow!” and pushed her.

Before Polly could retaliate, Cady moved behind them and placed a firm hand on each of their shoulders. “That’s quite enough.”

Obviously the children were too keyed up just to sit and listen, and a tedious writing assignment was also out of the question. Cady had to think of something that would keep them occupied or she’d have Bart jumping off the table again. That gave her an idea. Maybe if she gave them a lesson that involved activity, she might be able to capture their attention.

She looked at R. J. and glanced at the rest of the children. “You want to know what the colonists did next?” When they nodded, she said, “You’re going to show me.”

“But how? We don’t know.” R. J. looked skeptical.

“I’ll tell you, then we’re going to reenact the Boston Tea Party. Who wants to be a colonist and who wants to be a loyalist?”

“What did the colonists do?” R. J. asked again.

“They dressed up as Indians and dumped a whole shipload of tea into Boston Harbor.”

R. J.’s eyes lit up. “I’ll be a colonist. I can use these,” he said, pulling a wad of firecrackers from his pocket.

“Haven’t you learned your lesson yet?” Cady asked, holding out her hand for the explosives.

He shook his head as he gave them to her, and a wide grin split his features. “You can have these. Don’t matter much to me. I’ve got a whole pile of ‘em in my saddlebags.”

“See that they stay in your saddlebags,” Cady said sternly. “Now, I think Martha and Bart and R. J. should play the colonists. And Emily and Polly and John can be the loyalists.”

“What do I get to be?” Bobby Armstrong asked.

Cady thought for a minute. “You can be King George the Third.”

“Oh, boy!”

Cady organized her troops and marshaled her forces in their respective places, all the while spouting snippets of history to them. She was completely absorbed in her task when her husband walked into the room.

Kane studied the scene of complete chaos before him.

“What’s going on here?” he asked.

Cady whirled around and touched a hand to her chest, clearly startled. “Kane! You’re back!”

The children stopped to welcome him and he returned the greeting. “Go on with what you’re doing while I talk to the captain,” Cady said to her students.

Then she turned and crossed the room to Kane. He’d bet his captain’s bars that she planned to throw her arms around him—Cady wasn’t the type to hold anything back—but he couldn’t deal with that. If she touched him, he’d be lost.

He frowned and folded his arms over his chest. She stopped and hesitated before clasping her hands together in front of her.

“I asked you what was going on here,” he said.

“What are you doing back from patrol so soon?” she countered.

“We caught up with the Apaches in Horseshoe Canyon. They had Jason and Sarah Carberry with them, so I brought them back here. Mac and the rest of the men are escorting the renegades back to the reservation.”

“That’s wonderful!” Cady cried. “Are the children all right?”

“Just scratched and bruised. But their parents were butchered right in front of them, so who knows what scars they have on the inside.”

Cady sobered instantly, and the expression on her face was pure compassion. “The poor things. What will happen to them now?”

“They’re being looked after. Sergeant Armstrong and his wife have offered to take them in until next of kin can be notified.”

Cady looked thoughtful. “When they’re strong enough, I think they should come to school with the other children. It will help take their minds off their loss.”

There was a loud thump behind them, followed by a wail. Bart Grimes was sitting on the floor at the end of the table as he rubbed his ankle.

“I told you not to jump from there, Bart,” Cady said sternly as she started toward him.

“Ain’t broke, ma’am,” he said, in a voice that carried across the room. “Just hurts a little.”

She stopped and nodded. “I believe it’s time to write standards. Twenty-five times: ‘I will obey my teacher.’”

“Yes’m,” he said.

Kane admired her way with the children. With a combination of control and warmth, she had them practically eating out of her hand. She had tamed R. J., and that was saying something. She was a beautiful, capable woman and he couldn’t help loving her. But he felt himself being drawn so completely under her spell the power of his feelings scared him. He had to do something to stop it.

“What’s going on here, Cady?”

“I’m conducting school.”

“Even though there was a very real threat of Indian attack?”

“I tried to find you. When I couldn’t, I came here and the children had already arrived. Betsy said to hold school.”

He nodded at the whooping and hollering behind her. “You could have dispersed them.”

“We agreed that it was better for them to go about their normal routine.”

“This is their normal routine?” he asked when a loud argument erupted among the children.

She glanced over her shoulder, then back at him. “They couldn’t sit still, so we decided to act out the Boston Tea Party.”

“You want to bring two fragile children into this chaos? You call that teaching?” Kane knew he was being a bastard, but he couldn’t stop himself.

Cady’s chin snapped up and her green eyes blazed. “Since when does the army train officers to deal with children? How dare you come into my classroom and criticize my methods?”

“I’m in charge of the post.”

“Does that give you the right to stick your nose into something you know nothing about? Do I tell you how to run your fort?”

“It’s not the same thing.”

“It most certainly is.” Cady stopped and took a breath as she glared up at him. “If the Indian threat is over, there’s no reason on earth why I shouldn’t conduct lessons.”

“You should never have started class in the first place.”

Kane knew he was splitting hairs. He knew he was wrong and he knew he should apologize and beat a hasty retreat, but instinct was driving him and he’d learned to do whatever he had to for survival.

He stood his ground. “For all you knew, the Indians could have been massing out there for a major assault, and here you’d have been with a room full of children and no way to protect them.”

“You told me they’d never get past the perimeter.”

“I didn’t want you to be frightened.”

She put her hands on her hips. “So in addition to being an inadequate teacher, I’m also a coward? Please leave now, captain, before you upset my students more than they already are.”

“You’re throwing me out?”

“I am.”

He stared at her for a few moments, then realized the children had stopped their activity to watch the two adults. Kane didn’t take kindly to being ordered out, but he had enough sense left to hold his tongue. “We’ll discuss this later, when we’re alone.”

“We’ve said everything there is to say.”

She turned away, her spine ramrod stiff, her shoulders back, as tall and straight as any good soldier he’d
ever seen. She was walking away, but he felt as if he’d been dismissed. And her final words made him uneasy. They would talk later whether she wanted to or not. That was an order.

Cady walked into the stable after school that day, carrying a saddlebag, and proceeded to saddle Prince. In an effort to make amends, R. J. had told her to ride the horse any time she wanted. Since the boy’s apology on her wedding day, everything had been fine between them.

If only she could say the same for her husband. In her mind, the list of “if onlys” started ticking like the seconds on a clock.

If only R. J. hadn’t helped her out of the guardhouse, if only the rain had waited, if only the river had been passable, if only Jack had arrived sooner. If only Kane loved her.

She shook her head. She would go mad if she kept this up. The fact was, all of it had happened, and she was married to a man who had little or no respect for her: as a teacher, as a wife, as a woman.

She heard footsteps rustle in the hay behind her and whirled around. She felt tremendous relief that it was R. J. walking toward her from the far end of the stable.

“Howdy, ma’am,” he said, his grin friendly.

“Hello, R. J. What are you doing here?”

“I was goin’ ridin’. How ‘bout you?”

“Me too.”

He eyed the saddlebag she had just settled behind the saddle near the horse’s rump. “You usually take all that with you for an afternoon ride?”

She wanted to evade questions, but what was the point? “I’m going to my brother Jack’s cabin.”

The boy nodded thoughtfully. “Yes’m, I know where it is. Ain’t far, but it’s out of sight of the fort.”

“I know, but Captain Carrington said the Apaches were no longer a threat”—she turned away from him and put her left hand on the saddlehorn and her foot in the stirrup and hoisted herself onto the horse’s back—”and I need some time alone.”

R. J. moved beside the horse and patted its nose. “Hi, Prince. How ya doin’?” Then he looked up at her, a suspicious look in his bright blue eyes. “Does Kane know you’re goin’?”