Read Bottom Up (12 page)

 

 

Subject: (no subject)

From: Elliot Rowe

Date: Fri, May 9 at 11:43 AM

To: Madeline Whittaker

I was thinking you really need to get a coffeemaker. Seriously, how do you not own one?!

 

Subject: Re: (no subject)

From: Madeline Whittaker

Date: Fri, May 9 at 12:09 PM

To: Elliot Rowe

Because we have coffee at the office and I don't have many overnight guests?

 

Subject: Re: (no subject)

From: Elliot Rowe

Date: Fri, May 9 at 12:34 PM

To: Madeline Whittaker

I've never worked in an office. What's it like? Tell me everything!

 

Subject: Re: (no subject)

From: Madeline Whittaker

Date: Fri, May 9 at 12:45 PM

To: Elliot Rowe

Omg amazing. It's like you were hatched out of a free-will womb!

In an office they not only keep you in ass-fattening identical chairs, sitting under fluorescent lights, but they force you to drink coffee from freeze-dried packets and it's so weak, I'd make tea out of the water that comes out. Save me. :(

 

Subject: Re: (no subject)

From: Elliot Rowe

Date: Fri, May 9 at 1:30 PM

To: Madeline Whittaker

I just ate a quarter pound of Iberico ham out of our fridge.

 

Subject: Re: (no subject)

From: Madeline Whittaker

Date: Fri, May 9 at 1:56 PM

To: Elliot Rowe

That's the most sexual thing I've ever heard.

I'll be free by 7:30 btw.

 

Subject: Re: (no subject)

From: Elliot Rowe

Date: Fri, May 9 at 3:12 PM

To: Madeline Whittaker

Wait, did I black out and forget we have plans tonight? I'm supposed to get drinks with Eric and Jess . . .

 

Subject: Re: (no subject)

From: Madeline Whittaker

Date: Fri, May 9 at 3:55 PM

To: Elliot Rowe

Oh, no . . . honestly, I just kind of assumed we were hanging out. I don't know why. Sorry to be unclear. I was saying that I
am
free starting around 7:30. Been a total zombie (long week). x.

 

Subject: Re: (no subject)

From: Elliot Rowe

Date: Fri, May 9 at 4:15 PM

To: Madeline Whittaker

Why don't you just text me when you're off work and I'll let you know what we're doing?

 

Subject: Re: (no subject)

From: Madeline Whittaker

Date: Fri, May 9 at 4:26 PM

To: Elliot Rowe

Great. Sounds like a plan.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

---------Forwarded Message----------

Subject: Re: (no subject)

From: Madeline Whittaker

Date: Fri, May 9 at 3:55 PM

To: Elliot Rowe

Oh, no . . . honestly, I just kind of assumed we were hanging out. I don't know why. Sorry to be unclear. I was saying that I
am
free . . .

 

Subject: Re: (no subject)

From: Elliot Rowe

Date: Fri, May 9 at 3:12 PM

To: Madeline Whittaker

Wait, did I black out and forget we have plans tonight? I'm supposed to get drinks with Eric and Jess . . .

 

Subject: [Fwd: Re: (no subject)]

From: Madeline Whittaker

Date: Fri, May 9 at 10:15 PM

To: Emily Roberts

Read bottom up. So this is what is going on. I don't know. Am I nuts? I feel this kind of tacit step back on his part?

In a way I am obsessing about this on purpose. Because I know that “be yourself” is the name of the game, especially at this stage when we should be past games. So I have this theory that I can get to a state of “casual” by exhausting myself with analysis. Like a cat chasing its own tail.

Anyway, I kind of want to just ask him what's up but then I feel like it will turn into a “talk” that gets clocked in the context of the relationship and kind of chips away at that blissful beginning time. I'm not saying I am going to marry Elliot (though I would have
amazing dinners for the rest of my life) but let's just say we did, let's say we're old people in rocking chairs (go with it) and we're looking back over our lives being like, “Grandkids, when we were first together it was so romantic! But then Grandpa avoided defining us, kept weird hours, backtracked, flaked, and Grandma freaked the fuck out and didn't know where she stood. . . . Now, someone get me my bunion cream.”

Anyway, I was (am?) so excited because guess what? I finagled an opportunity for us to check into the Four Seasons for the night (next wk). Staying in hotels in one's own city! Hot! Romantic! And screw the weird vibes, I'm still going to ask him (and force him to make actual plans – oh, the horror). One tiny lie? I kind of talked my author (who the suite was actually meant for) into staying with friends because she's a Norwegian chef who I convinced would be lonely in a big fancy hotel . . . I am the devil. And could get into real trouble with this, especially since promotion budgets aren't what they used to be. This guy is driving me to a life of crime?

Love and straitjackets,

Mad