Professor and the Nanny (Silhouette Romance) (14 page)

What should she do? He’d need someone to look after Nate and Danny tomorrow while he was in court, but she needed to leave him, his house and his employment immediately! Whether or not she stayed and for how long was no longer an option for her. Like Danny, she was beginning to feel like a rubber ball tossed back and forth according to Ethan’s mood swings until she had no identity of her own.

She finally made up her mind as she wiped Danny’s face and hands. “Ethan, have you had lunch?”

“No, I’m not hungry,” he said.

“Then could we talk as soon as I get Danny down for his nap?” she asked.

She had her back to him, so she couldn’t tell what his reaction was, but he’d tried to apologize to her for the unfortunate episode between them yesterday a couple of times and she’d put him off.

“Of course—” he said, but was interrupted by Nate.

“Let me put the little guy to bed,” he said, and stood up. “I’ll read to him. It’s been a long time since I’ve heard
Peter Rabbit
.”

“All right,” Ethan agreed as he lifted the cleaned-up child out of the high chair. “I’ll carry him upstairs for you and you can take it from there.”

He looked at Brittany. “And I’ll meet you in the library in a few minutes if that’s okay with you.”

She nodded. “Fine,” she said, and watched as they headed for the staircase.

Brittany had the few lunch dishes stacked in the dishwasher and was drying her hands when Ethan joined her in the kitchen. “Dad insisted he could handle Danny by himself,” he told her, “so I let him do it. I don’t like to make him feel helpless. It’s so depressing to be told you can’t do something you’ve always done in the past.”

She hung up the towel she was using. “You’re a very wise man, Ethan. You really should have studied psychology and taken up counseling.”

He smiled and looked pleased for the first time today. “I did. I minored in psychology, but my major was English and the literary field. It’s a lot less stressful.”

She chuckled. “Well, I can’t argue with you about that,” she admitted as they crossed the hall and entered the library.

Automatically Ethan took his usual place behind the desk and Brittany sat in the chair across from him. It made for a formal arrangement, but she was grateful for the desk between them.

If he touched her she’d break down and lose control, and there was no way she was going to let herself do that.

She hurried to be the first to speak. “Ethan, I want you to know that I’m going to resign my position with you and move out of your house starting right now.”

She watched the blood drain from his face, but his voice was under control when he spoke. “But where will you go?”

She took a deep breath. “I’ve arranged to sublease an apartment from a student at the university who is going home for the summer but will come back when school starts up again.”

“But you didn’t want to take a temporary residence,” he reminded her.

“No, I didn’t,” she admitted, “but I’m afraid my sights have been set too high. I was too comfortable here….”

“And you’re not anymore?” he said sadly. It was more of a statement than a question.

She looked away from him. “No, I’m not, and neither are you. My behavior yesterday was unforgivable—”

Ethan cut in. “No, Brittany, it was my fault, not yours. I knew that if you stayed with us something like that would happen, but still I couldn’t let you go. Has your medical agency placed you in a job yet?”

She nodded. “Yes. I talked to them this morning and I can start Monday. But what will you do about Nate and Danny tomorrow during the court hearing?”

“That won’t be a problem. Zach says I’m to bring Danny to court with me.” He tried for a smile that wasn’t very successful. “Maybe if I have to restrain Danny and Hannah sees him in one of his tantrums she won’t be so eager to reclaim him.”

Brittany would like nothing better than to appear in court with Ethan and his family. To testify as to what a great father he was to his son, and son to his father, but she couldn’t do that unless Ethan requested it. Obviously he wasn’t going to do that and he was right.

The last thing he needed was to have it brought to the judge’s attention that Ethan had a young and pretty woman living in the same house with him and acting as a mother to his and Hannah’s impressionable child. Even though the only reason Brittany was there was because Hannah had abandoned Danny to his father when the youngster became too much of a burden to her.

“You will wait and say goodbye to Nate and Danny when they get up from their naps, won’t you?” Ethan asked.

Brittany had hoped to avoid that and spare herself some of the pain of parting, but she’d come to the conclusion earlier
that she couldn’t just walk away. Some kind of closure was important. To her as well as to them.

“Yes, of course I will,” she promised, and handed him a white card. “Also, I’ve written down my new address and phone number. Please let me know how this custody hearing turns out.”

He took it and put it in his shirt pocket. “You’ll be the first person I call.”

There was an awkward pause, then Brittany slid her chair back and rose. Ethan rose, too, and for a moment they just stood there gazing at each other.

“Well, I guess this is goodbye, then,” she said, her tone harsh with misery that she hoped he wouldn’t notice. “I…I’ve enjoyed working for you, Ethan. Taking care of Nate and Danny. Thank you for letting me be a part of your household….”

She didn’t offer him her hand. She knew she’d cry if he touched her.

Through the tears that misted her eyes she saw his features contort as he turned his face away from her. “Please, Brittany, don’t. You’ve brought us peace beyond measure and pleasure beyond price. I wish you a full and happy life—”

His voice broke and Brittany turned and fled upstairs to the room that wasn’t hers anymore. When she got herself under control again she started carrying her suitcases and boxes downstairs and putting them in her car. On the last trip Nate came out of his room and saw her.

“What are you doin’, missy?” he asked her. “Here, let me help you.”

She relinquished the smaller suitcase to him. Not that he wasn’t strong enough to carry the larger one, but she was afraid he might lose his balance and fall again.

“Where are you goin’?” he queried when they reached the tile floor.

Brittany put her piece of luggage down and turned to him.
“I’m moving out, Nate. I’ve taken a new job and found an apartment—”

“You mean you’re leavin’ us.” It was more an accusation than a question.

“Yes, I am,” she admitted. “It’s time for me to get on with my life. I’m becoming too attached to…to Danny. I want a husband and children of my own.”

“Well hell,” Nate drawled, and put his piece of luggage down, too, “you don’t have to go somewhere else to find that. You’re a fine-lookin’ woman. Any man would be proud to have you as a wife. If I wasn’t so damn old I’d marry you myself.”

“And if you propose to me I just might take you up on it,” she teased, and gave him a big hug.

He hugged her back. “Is there anything I can say to change your mind?” he murmured against her ear.

She blinked back unwelcome tears. “No. I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry, too,” he admitted. “That son of mine is making a terrible mistake and I think he knows it. I just hope it doesn’t destroy him somewhere along the road.”

A noise at the top of the staircase distracted them. They stepped apart and looked up to see Ethan standing there looking down at them with Danny in his arms.

“What’s going on?” he asked suspiciously, then paused. “Oh, I see. Brittany has told you that she’s leaving us.”

Nate glared at Ethan, then turned and disappeared down the hall.

Ethan carried Danny down the stairs and handed him to Brittany. She took him and nuzzled his fat little neck. “Goodbye, Danny boy,” she said as he wiggled with delight. “Be a good boy for Mommy and Daddy, and try to remember me. I’m the nanny who loves you best in all the world….”

Her voice broke and she knew she had to get out of there. With a hurried kiss on his cheek she handed him over to his father. “Goodbye, Ethan,” she said quickly, then picked up her suitcases and left without a backward glance.

W
hen Brittany first woke up the following morning she was disoriented. The sun streamed through the window above her bed, so why hadn’t Danny wakened her? He was always up at the crack of dawn and ready to play.

She blinked and held her arm above her face so she could see her watch. It was nine o’clock! That brought her to a sitting position and ready to spring out of bed when she remembered. She was miles across town from the Thorpe residence and Danny wasn’t her charge anymore.

She dropped back down and rolled on to her side. That’s why she’d slept so soundly and so long. She’d tossed and turned most of the night. Every time she’d started to drop off she’d think she heard Danny cry or call to her, and she’d wake up again.

Apparently the last time that happened her befuddled mind had finally accepted the fact that it was all right for her to sleep, and then she’d overslept.

So what was she going to do to pass the time until she started work on Monday? Four days with nothing to do and
nowhere to go. How ironic that Ethan needed assistance with Nate and Danny so badly and she had more free time than she could fill, but neither of them could ask for help from the other.

Brittany spent what was left of the morning putting away her clothes and trying to make the grubby little one-room apartment more homey. Since she had no groceries she drove to the inexpensive chain restaurant a few blocks down the street with the intention of having lunch there and then going shopping.

It had sounded like a good idea, but the café was too warm and humid, the food unappetizing, and her mind kept drifting to later this afternoon when Ethan would battle Hannah for custody of their son.

It would devastate Ethan if he lost, and God only knew what it would do to Danny if he were left to the cold indifference of his mother.

The big clock on the wall told her it was ten minutes after one. Ethan had said their appointment with the judge was for two. What was he going to do with Danny, who was approaching the “terrible twos” and could turn into a squirming, screaming little hellion and interrupt the whole proceedings if restrained for more than a few minutes.

And Nate? What about him? He would probably sit quietly in the courtroom and take an active interest in the proceedings, but what if his mind wandered and he got lost again when Ethan was distracted? Ethan needed help in looking after his family while he was in court. He couldn’t do it all by himself.

A wave of guilt swept over Brittany. What was the matter with her, anyway? Why was she sitting here worrying about the situation when she had the power to do something about it? If she hurried she could still get to the courthouse and volunteer her services to keep track of Nate and Danny during the proceedings. This custody thing was hard enough on Ethan without the added burden of trying to placate a rambunctious
child and keep an eye on an elderly man with a penchant for wandering off.

She signaled the server for her bill and rushed out of the building. In her hurry to start her car she flooded the engine and had to wait. Then she hit almost every red light between the restaurant and the courthouse, so that by the time she arrived at her destination she was five minutes late.

Dejected, Brittany sat in the car with the motor running. Now what? Could she get into the courtroom without causing a disturbance?

Should
she even try? Or would she do more harm than good by showing up? Would Ethan prefer that she stay the hell out of his family affairs?

With a sigh she turned off the switch. She might as well go in and see what was going on. She could stay out of sight if that seemed advisable or she could step in if Danny and Nate got unruly. Besides, she couldn’t stay away. She had to be there. Had to know how things were going.

It didn’t work out that way. Ethan and Nate were sitting on a bench in the hall outside one of the doors, and Nate was holding Danny on his lap. Ethan looked up and saw her, did a double take and stood to greet her, a relieved smile on his face. “Brittany! You did come after all.”

He took both of her hands in his, and she wanted to fall into his arms, but that would be totally inappropriate. She wasn’t going to make a fool of herself. “I thought you might need some help with Danny. Besides, I…I couldn’t stay away.”

He squeezed her hands. “I’m glad.” His tone left no doubt that he meant it and she felt shaky all over.

She glanced at the almost-empty hall. “Haven’t they called your case yet?”

Ethan shook his head. “The one just before us is running a little late. Hannah’s not here yet, either.”

Brittany had never been in court before, but it seemed that there was something wrong here. “Where’s your lawyer?”

Ethan shrugged. “Zach was here but he left just before you came in to see if he could find Hannah and Cliff, her attorney.”

It seemed to Brittany that things weren’t very well organized for being a court of law, but before she could comment Danny called out “Mama, Mama” and held up his arms to her.

She took him from Nate and hugged him close even as she frowned. “I hope he doesn’t call me that in front of Hannah. Would you like for me to take him home and look after him until you get there? I can take Nate, too.”

“Not on your life, missy,” Nate said. “I’m gonna stay right here.”

“The judge wants Danny here,” Ethan said, “but I’d appreciate it if you’d stay and help me keep him corralled. I’ll deal with Hannah when and if it becomes necessary.”

Before she could respond, the door across from them opened and several people came out of a small courtroom. A man in a uniform of black trousers and a white shirt approached them and said, “Your case is next, Mr. Thorpe. Is everybody here?”

Ethan opened his mouth, but before he could speak two other men came rushing down the hall toward them. “Sorry, but could we delay for a few minutes?” the younger and better dressed of the two asked. “I represent Ms. Thorpe, but she’s not here yet. Must have gotten tied up in traffic.”

“Well, I don’t know,” the bailiff said. “You’ll have to talk to Judge Stewart, of course, but the calendar is pretty crowded.”

He preceded them down the aisle. Nate and Brittany took seats at the back of the room while Ethan carried Danny and walked beside Zach up to the front. When the case had been
called, Cliff asked for a brief stay since his client hadn’t arrived as yet.

“Was she properly notified of the time and date of this hearing?” Judge Stewart, a no-nonsense woman, asked.

“Yes, Your Honor,” Cliff said. “I talked to her last night to remind her just in case she’d misunderstood.”

The judge looked down her nose at the attorney. “Then why isn’t she here?”

Cliff winced. “I have no idea, but I’m sure she has a good excuse—”

“I’m not interested in excuses,” the judge thundered. “I’ll give her ten minutes to show up—” She banged her gavel and went into her chambers.

Ten minutes was barely enough time to change Danny’s diaper before they returned to the hearing. Hannah was still nowhere to be seen in the courtroom or the hall outside it. The judge again banged her gavel and asked, “Has Ms. Thorpe been located?”

Cliff stood slowly. “No, Your Honor, she hasn’t, but I’d like to request a postponement—”

Zach was on his feet. “I object! Ms. Thorpe had plenty of notice as to when and where this hearing was going to take place. She apparently didn’t think that having custody of her child was important enough to interrupt her schedule—”

Out of the corner of her eye Brittany saw a second bailiff come into the room and walk silently down the aisle. He handed a sheet of paper, probably a fax, to Hannah’s attorney and left.

The attorney scanned it, then seemed to read it again more slowly.

He looked at Zach then at the judge. “May we approach the bench, Your Honor?”

The judge nodded and the two lawyers stepped forward. Zach looked as perplexed as Brittany felt. Her nerves were
about to explode! What could be important enough to interrupt court proceedings? Especially at this late stage.

Cliff reluctantly handed the paper up to the judge, who read it, her scowl getting blacker with every moment. When she finished she handed it to Zach, who also read it. The two men plus the judge looked stunned.

“Did either of you have prior knowledge of this?” the judge asked.

“No, ma’am!”

“Absolutely not!”

Zach handed the paper back to the judge, who took it and read aloud.

Brittany couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Hannah was withdrawing her suit for custody of Danny! But why had she started this in the first place if she didn’t care enough for the child to see it through?

Nate pawed lightly at Brittany’s arm. “What did she say, missy? I couldn’t hear.”

“Not now, Nate,” she said. “I’ll tell you later. I think the judge is going to speak again.”

She was right. Judge Stewart looked at the men in front of her, then settled her gaze on Ethan. “Do you still want to petition for full-time custody of your son?”

“I most certainly do,” he said emphatically.

She looked at Cliff. “Do you have anything to say, Mr. Jensen?”

It was obvious that Cliff was seething with anger at his missing client. “No, I don’t, Your Honor.”

“Then I hereby grant full and irrevocable custody of the child, Daniel Thorpe, to his father, Ethan Thorpe, until said child reaches the age of eighteen.”

She banged her gavel with an air of finality and strode into her chambers.

When the judge was out of sight Ethan thanked the two lawyers, then rushed up the aisle to grab Nate and tell him they’d won. Nate was overjoyed. He picked Danny up and squeezed him while Ethan turned to Brittany and took her in his arms.

She knew they weren’t being very dignified, but she was too happy to care. Instead, she threw her arms around his neck and felt tears of joy streaming down her cheeks.

“Oh, Ethan, I’m so happy for you,” she said enthusiastically, “and what’s more you won’t ever again have to worry about Hannah trying to take Danny away from you.”

“I’m happy, too,” he said, and nuzzled her neck. “I’m so happy I want to celebrate. Will you go to dinner with me tonight? Just the two of us.”

He was asking her for a real honest-to-goodness date, but that was not only inadvisable, it was impossible.

“But what about Danny and Nate?” she asked. “Who’ll look after them?”

“That’s all taken care of,” he told her mysteriously. “My neighbor next door has agreed to come over and stay with them. She’s an elderly widow and I don’t like to impose on her, but she bailed me out a few times before you came along when I had something important going on at school.”

Brittany was having trouble following his explanation. “You mean you set this all up in advance even though you
didn’t know whether or not you’d have anything to celebrate?”

He shook his head. “I knew that being alone with you tonight was vitally important to me whether I won custody or not.”

Warning signals began popping off in her brain and she tried to force herself to heed them, but what the heck. She and Ethan were both entitled to celebrate this momentous occasion! What difference did it make when it was planned?

She stepped out of his embrace and walked along beside him out of the courtroom and down the hall.

“I—I’m pleased that you want to share your celebration with me,” she stammered. “What shall I wear?”

He laughed. “A typical question. I’ve made reservations for seven o’clock at the Plantation House. It’s semiformal, but as far as I’m concerned you can wear anything you want and you’ll still be the most beautiful woman in the establishment.”

It was a wonderful evening. Ethan arrived to pick Brittany up looking splendid in a navy-blue suit and white shirt with gold cuff links and a navy-blue silk tie. He even had a corsage for her, a delicate white orchid that he carefully pinned on her black chiffon dress.

She felt beautiful, and the look in Ethan’s eyes told her she was.

The food and ambience at the Plantation House was excellent as always, and a small live orchestra played big-band music for dreamy dancing in the dimly lit room. Brittany made a determined effort to relax and enjoy herself, and not remember that this was the last time she and Ethan would go out together.

For the most part she was successful, but she felt a sharp pain in her heart when the music stopped and it was time to leave. They held hands in the car on the ride home and Brittany
wondered what would happen when it came time to say goodbye.

They were listening to classical music on the radio, but the closer they came to her apartment the more stressed-out she felt. There was no longer any reason for them to stay in touch. She was sure he wouldn’t call on her to baby-sit again, and even if he did she’d have to refuse.

Would she ever again love any man as much as she loved this one? He insisted she didn’t know what love was, but she knew better. She’d always been in pretty good touch with her feelings, and she had no doubt that she loved Ethan deeply. It wasn’t something she had to think about, it was an emotion she felt.

When the car slowed down she realized they were approaching her apartment. Sliding her hand from his, she reached for the handle on the door and turned slightly toward him. “I had a wonderful time—” she started to say, but he interrupted.

“May I come up for a while, Brittany? There’s something I want to talk to you about.”

That was the last thing she’d expected him to say, and she was jarred right out of her ability to speak. Instead she sputtered, “Well I…That is, what…”

What could he possibly want to say to her? They’d already covered all they had to talk about. Not once but several times. So often, in fact, that her nerves were rubbed raw on the subject.