Princess Ces'alena (47 page)

Jordan paused, knowing full well who he meant, unable to respond to that, he went on to say, “…the ol’man come out to the fields a lot more…checking on thangs… makin’ sure them new overseers do what they was hired for. He try to stay busy while you gone, but he miss you…some awful.”

“That is just too bad isn’t it?” He stated coldly. Jordan sighed. “He sorry Manny, ain’t nobody more sorrier than him that boy gone.”

“Bullshit! He should have stopped it! And sorry is not going to bring him back to me now is it?”

Jordan couldn’t say anything…there was just so much a person could say under the circumstances, so he fell quiet. Manny’s head was down, as he flicked the citrus branch now and then, “We looked everywhere we thought he could be found. Almost found him too…’cept…don’t matter.” They sat there in companionable silence, one as easy in the presence of the other as they’d always been. Words were not always necessary with them; though they originated from two separate worlds and cultures…no two men could be closer or more comfortable with each other. “How’s your back been? You better?”

“She some special kin’ o’lady, that Ms Margaret. She talk to me a few times. As’ me to do her a favor or two. She say thangs to you like, thank you - would you please - and how she so ‘preciate thangs…real nice lady. She talk to me like I was a man, not some nigga’ she need for a erran’.”

“I’m glad to hear that.”

“She like a breath of sunshine ‘round here. I thank yo’ daddy got a liken for her, that blonde hair of hers — them blue eyes sparkling…there a whole lot’o’woman in that small package. Make you wonder who Ms Katherine like?”

“Her father. I never met him, but I remember her mother telling me about him. She’s very much like him.”

Jordan’s head bobbed in understanding as they slipped back into silence once again. His thoughts strayed to Lena… he felt it once again, the rise of his desire to tell Manny about his daughter. The responsibility that came with such a disclosure was more than he was willing to take on. Should something happen to that sweet baby because he weakened and gave in…he truly would not be able to live with himself. He might have struggled more with it if it hadn’t been for Katherine’s return. However, because she was now back…it made him realize just how important it was that no one, save them know of her existence.

“
She alright…I guess…at least she seem to be. I don’t see her all that much no more. She do her work in the big house, then she go right back to her cabin and close herself in. She don’t show herself no more unless she need to for something.” Jordan informed his softly. Manny swallowed and then sighed, his stomach began to ache just talking about her. He couldn’t ignore certain questions anymore…maybe knowing, would help him fight the effects he experienced thinking about her.

“Who is he Jordan? The man she’s with now?” He asked, hoping that by knowing…he could begin removing her from his heart.

Jordan hadn’t given much thought to that part of their plan. It was one thing to keep the truth about his daughter from him, but he was not about to add another lie to it. “Tell you the truth…I don’t rightly know. I ain’t never seen her with no man; nobody I work with say nothin’ ‘bout no man. Ain’t no man I ever see go in that cabin, and no man ever I see coming out.”

Manny leaned back in the chair exhaling. “Well, there is a man… because I’ve seen the child.”

“Maybe so…but he ain’t ‘round her now.”

“Jordan I never thought she would have given herself to another man. I didn’t want to believe it; but even I cannot deny what my eyes have seen.”

“I thought what she and I had was something special. I don’t know…maybe she did it…to hurt me - like I hurt her…marrying Katherine the way I did.”

Manny shook himself for being ridiculous…he was weakening; he could feel himself giving in. He wanted her back so bad, he wondered could he accept the child…just accept it and move on? However, he kept going back to the thought that she didn’t love him as he had her, because otherwise…she would have waited for him. Stayed true to him; but she hadn’t…she’d reached out for someone else, even if temporarily…and the results were perfectly clear. It would never be the same…it just couldn’t be. He then grew angry with himself because he couldn’t balance his feelings of fairness. He couldn’t accept his part of causing what happened by marrying and fathering a child with Katherine…even though she miscarried – he realized that he was selfish for that. He couldn’t see that side of justice …and hated that in himself… that he wanted her as she had been… untouched by any other, his and his alone – again, possessive, selfish and prideful. He needed a detour from such thoughts.

“Well, I guess I’ll go turn in now, you should as well. Tomorrow I’ll be going in the fields with you, checking up on you to see how you’ve done in my absence.” He joked. Jordan chuckled, not at all offended.

“Yeah you bes’ get some rest. Get that head clear to learn somethin’. When you see how right thangs is now, you be wonderin’ how come you ain’t do so well yo’self! No worry though, I sit you down, school’yah like I would if you was a city boy.”

“My my, I can’t wait till morning comes!” Manny stood chuckling.

“No worry, i’s just a few hours away. I see you then.” Jordan promised smiling. Manny was stepping down from the porch when Jordan stopped in his doorway and called out to him. “Manny!”

He stopped on the last step, turning back to Jordan. “I need to remind you of something…I need you to do me a favor…and remember this.”

“Sure…what?”

“Remember what I tell you in the barn? Everything we do…we do to protect - you….and yours. An’ - well, thangs ain’t always what they seem; sometime, what we think we see, ain’t what we see at all, the eyes can be deceivin’.”

Manny’s brows pinched at the mystery of his words. “What?! What does that mean? What are you saying?”

“Just what I say…you remember it. I ain’t sayin’ no more…good night.” With that he went inside and closed the door. Leaving Manny standing in a cloud of confusion, and for a second, only a second, he wondered if it had anything to do with Lena. Fear however won out, not allowing him to go any further with thoughts in that direction. His mind was filled with many things …many decisions…and plans; it was all a matter of making up his mind.

Lena lay awake after finally getting Hope to sleep, which was not easy. She looked so cute, sleeping with her knees drawn up underneath, her bottom up in the air; Lena smiled as once again she gazed lovingly at her daughter. Still very much amazed at her beauty…a girl…Hope.

“You were so right Mikey, look at her; oh if you could only see your little sister.” She spoke softly, gently pulling a fat golden curl at the baby’s nape. She always kept Hope in bed with her now…it did little good for sleeping through the nights dry…but it helped her to get through them just the same. Loneliness had a way of making a night impossibly long, as if endless. Most of hers were filled with silent tears for her son, or his father; one usually led into the other. Unable to sleep, Lena rolled out of bed cautiously, so as not to awaken her baby. She walked to the clothes hook by her bed, to put on her robe, her hand going to the other one that hung there; stroking down its length longingly. She closed her eyes imagining him standing before her in it. She smiled…by now, she would be wrapped in his arms, the embrace strong and possessive…she could just imagine his lips at her throat…kissing. Lena’s eyes popped open as she shook herself, feeling her body respond to such fantasies. Turning away she slipped her arms into her own robe; her mind flashing back to a time when they were happy.

Many nights were spent in her cabin after they made love, unable to sleep, they’d slip on their robes and skip across the lawn in the middle of the night. Giggling and laughing; hoping that no one saw them as they raced into the kitchen to raid the larder. With a bottle of wine, bread and cheese in hand, they’d run back, with Manny dragging her laughing behind. His deep chuckles shushing her all the way, once back in, they’d sit up in their robes playing cards - with Manny trying to teach her how. Even with her lack of knowledge for the game, she knew when he was cheating her, laughing uncontrollably at his crazy explanations for the way he was then playing.

Rules of the game ever changing…those nights were wonderful. Sometimes Mike would have fallen asleep at Kayleen’s cabin…or he was with
Leon or Johnnypoe. The nights were spent with them into mischief, setting traps at various cabins for those whom they targeted to wake and fall into.

Like two mischievous children up past their bedtime…they laughed, loved, romped and played the night away.

Smiling she stepped out onto her porch. She stood in her usual spot against the post by the steps with one arm wrapped around it; one hand in her pocket. She looked out over the yard at the big house, and then up at the beautiful star sprinkled sky and half moon.

With her head leaning against the post, she drew in a deep breath; eyes closed savoring the delightful fragrance…she smelled citrus. She felt a little tug at the bottom of her robe; and looked down smiling to see a young cat there playing with the end of it. She chuckled low, using her toe to tap at its nose, then snatching her foot away as it tried to catch it with both paws to nip her. She giggled from the ticklish sensation his paw inflicted on her sensitive foot.

Suddenly its ears snapped around in attention as it looked away from her, then jumped and ran under the porch. Lena leaned forward a little hanging onto the post with one hand to see where he went. “Here kitty kitty kitty…where’d you go? Here kitty kitty kitty?” Sighing she straightened up, wondering what had frightened it away, when she looked straight ahead and saw what. She froze, swallowing convulsively.

Not thirteen feet away stood Manny. He was as still as she. A chill ran down her spine that made her tremble. Her heart took off immediately, racing with such intensity she had to draw in deep breaths…able to hear the thump thump - thump thump - in her ears.

By the stars above and then half moon glowing near, their eyes found each other and locked. Lena wanted to look away, needed to look away, but that invisible beam that entrapped them, would not allow her to. Her eyes could not stop their taking in as much of him as they could and despite that, ger stomach churned with fear, she could actually feel the blood pumping rapidly through her veins.

‘
God help me…help me.’
She prayed desperately. Standing as he was, there was no denying that he stood as magnificent as any in his masculinity, such a powerful man…making her weak with longing. She had to fight this, she knew that she did, his child, Hope, lay right behind the door and she could not let him near, she had to do something, but what? She couldn’t bring herself to move, he had an effortless hold on her, one she could not resist.

As if drawn by a powerful magnet, Manny took the steps that brought him closer to her. The memory of her was nothing compared to what stood before him now. Her hair was parted at one side to fall thick and beautiful to the one shoulder, showing large waves from being braided, and then, unbraided to hang with the ends reaching as if in an attempt to caress her breast.

His eyes slowly flowed back to her eyes; bright, wide - boldly gold…beautiful. Her body was slender, firm in places he knew…as well soft in others - her hips the perfect round for his size hands. Visions of his hands on those hips as he kissed her, rushed through his mind. Visions of her creamy caramel shoulder bared to his touch, her skin glistening beautifully when covered in sweat. His – she had been his, he had been the first to know her – had loved her more times than he could count. Manny swallowed feeling the moisture grow in his mouth, standing right below her, his eyes lowered again to her breasts – he knew what they looked like, hidden as they were, he knew the size of them, how they fit in his palm, their shape… her nipples and the taste of them.

A frightened whimper brought his eyes back up.

‘
Breath Manny…breath. She betrayed you! Leave her be, don’t…don’t look at her lips, or that tongue wetting them from her fear.’
Manny swallowed as his mouth watered even more, he was dying to taste her again. Just once more…
‘No! - you do…you’re doomed! It’s over! She’ll make a sniveling beggar out of you! Don’t – give - in!’
The smell of her made his head spin, clean, fresh of wild flowers - he drew her scent in deep down within him…wishing he could hold it there. His hands clenched by his side for control.

Lena stood breathing hard - she wanted him to touch her. Just once more she wanted to know and be reminded of his touch. She wanted to feel the large hardness of his body close to hers. She wanted the rough toughness of him possessing her, just – one more time – just once more – even if it hurt. At the same time knowing she was jeopardizing her daughter’s safety. Just the hungry look in his eyes was enough to send her soul up in flames. She shivered suddenly…wanting his hands on her so badly she was on the verge of begging.
‘Are you crazy! Have you lost your mind! Get away from him! Say something! Break the spell! Break it!’