“Okay. I’m hoping.”
With Charlotte propped up in his arms, John asked, “Hey honey, should I put Charlotte down for a nap now or do you want to wait?”
“Oh, now is good. That way she’ll be delightful when Tony gets here.”
“Okay. I’ll grab her bottle and blankie and put her down.”
“Thanks honey.”
“I’m nervous, Mom.” Wiping her hands on her Kate Spade polka-dot apron, she asked, “Isn’t that silly?”
“No I don’t think so. This is a big day for you.”
An hour or so later, as Jackie and Gina set the table, they heard John talking to Tony in the foyer. Jackie went out to meet him. “Hi. We didn’t hear the doorbell.” She pecked his cheek.
“As always, a breath of fresh air.” Tony smiled.
“Come.” She grabbed his hand. “Gina’s in the kitchen.”
Tony handed Gina a white dessert box and pink poinsettia. “These are for you. Blueberry cheesecake’s in the box. Your mother said it’s your favorite. Your home is beautiful.”
“Oh thanks, we love it here.” Gina kissed his cheek. “And thanks for these too. Have a seat at the island. We’re opening wine. Or we have beer?”
“A beer’s fine, thanks.” He sat beside Jackie at the island.
“Dinner will be ready shortly. We’re having football food. Mom says you’re a fan of chili. I make some kick-ass chili, I must admit. Good?”
“I love it. But honestly, you could serve cereal and I’d be no less excited to be here.”
Genuinely touched, Gina responded, “That’s sweet, Tony.”
“It smells awesome.”
“Gina’s quite a gourmet cook,” Jackie said, starting to make Mexican dip. “When she says she’s cooking something simple like chili, it’s beyond the basic recipe. She loves cooking. Always has.”
“I relax in the kitchen. So, Mom tells me you’re living at Nana’s?”
“Yes. I moved back when she was still there and I stayed after she went into the home. I love that house. It’d be unbearably lonely without my buddy Bailey, though.”
“Mom told me about him. We love dogs.”
“Really, why don’t either of you have one?”
“We’re considering getting one. But Mom’s a softy. The dog would run her life. She’ll have to share ours,” Gina replied, only half joking.
“It’s true.” Jackie chuckled. “My friends say I’d have it eating at the kitchen table with a fork and knife. They’re right.”
John entered the kitchen carrying Charlotte. “Our little girl is wide awake and ready to play.”
With arms open, Charlotte squealed with excitement when she spotted her grandpa. “Oh please, John, can I take her?” Tony asked, reaching out his arms. Charlotte responded in kind.
“Sure. Looks like she wouldn’t have it any other way.” John smiled as he handed Charlotte to Tony. “Why don’t you two go play with Charlotte in the living room? I’ll help Gina finish dinner before the game.”
Jackie and Tony sat on the living room floor with Charlotte. Sitting in her Bumbo, she squealed as she enjoyed her grandparents’ attention.
“Oh my God! My heart stops when she smiles up at me,” Tony exclaimed. “Did you see that?”
“I did!” Jackie smiled affectionately.
Gina watched from the kitchen. “Look at how good he is with Charlotte. He would’ve been an amazing dad.”
John put his arm around his wife’s shoulder. “I see that too. But you know, at least Charlotte has a chance to have an amazing grandfather. I’m glad you’re giving them a chance.”
“As my mother said, she did it for me. My life would’ve been so empty without Louie and Anna. Just think, I’d never have met the boys. Or smoked my first stogie. Or learned how to gamble responsibly.” They laughed. “Yup, my mom’s a smart cookie. You owe your kid the chance to be loved.”
He nodded. Okay, I’ll start putting the food on the island. It’ll be self-serve.”
“Perfect for football night. Make sure you put out all the chili fixings.”
“Oh course,” John responded, kissing his wife tenderly. He called out, “Hey Tony, want to change channel? It’s almost kickoff time. The food’s ready whenever you guys are.”
“Sure thing.”
*
“Hi Gina, it’s Tony.”
“Hi.” She put the phone between her shoulder and ear, as she fed Charlotte.
“First of all, thank you so much for Sunday. It was wonderful, the food and the company.”
“Oh you’re welcome. John and I enjoyed it as well. We’ll do it again sometime soon.”
“That’d be great. I’ll look forward to it. For now I wondered if you’d come with me to see my mother tomorrow night? She’s had a few rough days. It’d be the highlight of her week to see us together. She’s heard all the reports. But it’ll be different to actually see for herself.”
“Great idea. I’ve had a hard time getting up there the past few months. We can bring her a chicken parm from the Chateau. Isn’t that her favorite meal?”
“She’d love that. How about we have dinner at the Chateau, then go to the nursing home?”
“Sure. I’ll look forward to it.”
*
John got home from work early to babysit Charlotte. Punctual as usual, Tony rang the doorbell at five sharp. Grabbing her raincoat, Gina yelled, “Bye honey, I’m leaving.” John came around the corner to kiss his wife good-bye. “We should be back by nine.”
Tony waited on the porch with an umbrella. Gina huddled under the umbrella as he escorted her to his Lincoln MKC. “What a thoughtful guy,” she said.
“Just taking care of my kid.” He opened the car door for her.
*
“Table for two?” the hostess asked.
“Yes please.” Tony rested his hand on the small of Gina’s back, guiding her to go before him.
Sliding into the brown leather booth, Tony said, “You know what I always found strange?”
“What’s that?”
“That we never bumped into each other at my mother’s room. I always hoped we would.”
“Oh, I used to call ahead to see when you’d been there and try to estimate the best times to work around you.”
Tony grimaced and sat silent for a moment. “It makes me sick to realize that you felt you needed to do that.”
“Yeah, well, as my mother says, that was then and this is now. It’s a funny thing, though.” She turned serious. “Sunday was fun, but bittersweet for me. Seeing how good you are with Charlotte amazes me. As her mother, I think it’s great. But I see that you’d have been a wonderful father too. I feel gypped.” She reached affectionately for his hand. “I don’t mean to make you feel guilty. I accept what was and I’m grateful for what is. But I must be honest about my feelings if we’re to have any kind of a real relationship.”
“Thank you for being honest.” He squeezed her hand. “Gina, I know you were gypped. Truth be told, I was too. I will always regret missing out on your life. I hope you know that.”
“I do. My mother might be right. While I was still angry, she kept saying this whole situation is sad and we all lost. So we should appreciate that we have a chance to start over. Anyway, my childhood was great, you know. Should I take out the picture books and show you?” she said, referring to when she was three. They laughed.
“Oh my God. You were adorable! ‘You missed me when I was a baby,’ he mimicked. “So you filled me in.”
“Yeah. Pretty funny.” She fiddled with the straw in her water glass.
“You remind me of your mother, the way you fiddle.”
“Yup, we’re fiddlers! Speaking of my mom, I heard about you two.”
Tony smiled warmly. The waitress came to the table. “Would you like something to drink? Or are you ready to order?”
Tony looked at his watch. “We should order so we can get to Nana.”
“Sure, let’s. I always get the same thing when I come here, so I’m ready.”
“Me too.” Tony motioned for Gina to order first.
“I’ll have chicken parm, ziti, creamy Italian on the salad and a glass of cabernet sauvignon, please.”
“Like father like daughter.” Tony chuckled. “I’ll have exactly the same.”
As the waitress placed the salads, bread basket, and wine on the table, Gina unfolded her napkin, placing it on her lap. “So how’s Nana doing? She had a rough couple of days? Are you they still talking about removing her spleen?”
“Well, her platelets remain low and she needs transfusions every other day. But operating at her age seems ridiculous, particularly when the doctors say they aren’t even sure it’ll help. In addition to that,” Tony pulled off a piece of warm Italian bread and buttered it, “she’s more delusional these days. It’s harder to share lucid moments.”
Wanting to lighten the conversation, Gina asked, “So Tony, what are you doing for Christmas?”
“Oh, no plans as of yet. I typically visit my mother and
—
”
“Please join us for Christmas. Maybe you can even bring Nana?”
“Wow, that’d be wonderful, Gina! Thank you. I’m not sure about Nana, but I’ll ask the staff and see what they say.”
*
Tony knocked, then opened the door to Anna’s room.
“Hi Ma. We brought you some chicken parm.”
“Hi Nana.” Gina followed close behind.
Anna looked at them; tears filled her eyes. She sighed as she leaned her head against her pillow, taking in the sight before her. “I’m overwhelmed by the most beautiful sight I’ve ever seen. I can die a happy woman. Come here, dear.” She hugged her granddaughter. “You two look so much alike.”
Gina nodded. “I guess we do. Are you hungry Nana?” she asked as Tony opened the Styrofoam container, placed it on her tray, and cut a few bite-size pieces of chicken. “It’s your favorite.”
“Oh, I’m starving!” She lifted the fork to stab a piece of chicken.
Gina whispered to Tony, “She seems fine today.”
“Yeah, it seems so. We’re lucky,” he whispered back. “You should’ve seen her yesterday. She didn’t even know my name.”
“Oh, so sad. I’m glad we came today.”
When Tony dropped Gina off, she said, “Tony, you have a standing invitation to Sunday dinner every week. I just want you to know that.”
“You know that means I’ll be there every Sunday now.”
“I’ll look forward to each one.” She smiled at him.
He walked around the car carrying his umbrella, escorted his daughter to her front door, and affectionately kissed her cheek.
December 2007
S
ince childhood, Christmas was Gina’s favorite holiday. She began playing Christmas carols in early November, and relished displaying her collection of Christmas decorations in every corner of her home. She enjoyed cooking and baking all the traditional holiday confections and was a natural hostess. On Christmas day, her house was open to family and friends. This year was extraordinary because Tony would be here, something no one had imagined.
Jackie typically spent Christmas Eve with the Bakers with Gina and John. Tony usually spent Christmas Eve at his cousin Doug’s house, who had taken over the tradition from Louie and Anna years before. This year, Jackie and Tony agreed to split the evening.
The first stop was the Bakers. The scent of baked ham and holiday goodies, and the din of the holiday celebration filled their home inside and out. Gina escorted Tony through the introductions. “This is my father, Tony Salvucci.”
He made eye contact with each person, and meaning every word, he said, “It’s my pleasure to meet you.”
Sitting at the dining room table which opened into the living room, Jackie and Tony watched the seven Baker grandchildren, ages five months to eight years, open their Christmas presents. “Jack, this is like a Norman Rockwell painting! What a great family our little girl married into.”
“So true.” She hooked her arm into his, resting her head on his shoulder.
*
At Tony’s cousin’s house, Jackie was reintroduced to people she’d met years ago, and introduced to the younger generation. Jackie told Tony, “It’s so strange seeing these people thirty years later. Your cousin Doug’s son looks like his dad at his age!”
A middle-aged woman with shoulder-length layered brown hair and brown eyes came over to them. “Hi Jackie, I’m Tony’s cousin Diane.”
“It’s nice to see you again.”
“You too. It’s so nice to see you two together again. I thought you made a perfect couple way back when you kicked our butts in ping-pong.”
They laughed. Doug joined them. “I overheard your conversation. It
is
great to see you two together. This bastard paid his price for being a dumb-ass.” Doug slapped Tony’s shoulder. “Tone, you know I say that with love.” Turning to Jackie he whispered, “Honestly, this is the first time I’ve seen Tony
really
happy since 1978.”
“I can’t wait to meet Gina and her family. Maybe they can join us at this year’s family barbeque,” Diane said.
“She’d love that,” Jackie said.
*
Jackie and Tony returned to her townhouse. “Before we do another thing, open this gift from me,” she said.
“Okay.” He opened the rectangular box and lifted a Ralph Lauren oxford pajama shirt and matching bottoms. “They’re great! Thanks!”
“Welcome. I wanted to make sure you’re comfortable when you’re here. Let’s go change. Then we’ll light the fireplace and exchange real gifts. Good?”
“Perfect.”
Jackie wore royal-blue satin pajamas and Tony sported his brand-new Ralph Lauren ensemble. “How thoughtful, Jackie. I’m super comfortable.” He hugged her as if he’d never let her go.
“I’m glad you’re comfortable.” Jackie clicked on Pandora, Christmas Radio. Bing Cosby sang “Santa Claus is Coming to Town.”
“You light the fire. I’ll get some wine.” Jackie returned from the kitchen and handed Tony a glass of wine. She snuggled into the sofa beside him. They clinked of the glasses, then kissed.
Tony took a small jewelry box off the coffee table. “For you.”
She opened the box to reveal a ring with a sparkling oval sapphire flanked by round diamonds, set in 14 karat white gold. “It’s stunning. Thank you so much.” He slipped it on her finger.
“I’m glad you like it, but there’s more to the story. I chose a sapphire because it represents sincerity, constancy, and truth. Those are three qualities I want us to share always.”
“Tony, that’s so sweet and makes the ring all the more beautiful.” They shared a long and loving kiss.
Jackie handed Tony a second present, a small thick square box. He unwrapped and opened it. “Wow, a Rolex! It’s beautiful but way too much.”