NOCTE (Nocte Trilogy #1) (23 page)

TRIGENTA
DUO

I
clatter down the porch steps, just in time to see Dare emerging from his
cottage.
 

Like always, he’s dressed in slim dark
jeans and a snug t-shirt.
 
He’s
heading for his bike and he looks like he’s going to continue on his way, until
he notices my face.
 
His eyes narrow
as he sees my state of distress. He immediately changes course and heads for
me.

“What’s wrong?” he asks in concern, his
hand reaching for mine.
 

I pull away. “Oh, now you’re worried
about that?”
 
I can’t help but
ask.
 
The emotions of the day are
threatening to overwhelm me.

He shakes his head. “Don’t do that.
 
I’ve already explained.
 
Everything is just complicated.”

I swallow hard.
 
“Finn’s gone.
 
I can’t find him.
 
I think he went to Nocte.”

Dare nods toward his bike without
hesitation.
 
“Then let’s go.”

We pull on helmets and are on the road
within a minute.
 
My arms wrap
around his waist like they belong there, and I suddenly realize that they
do.
 
My arms belong wrapped around
this man, no matter what.
 
No matter
what secrets he might have, or what might be going on with me.
 

When I’m upset, he calms me.
 
When I’m breathless, he gives me air.
When I’m sad, he buoys me.
 
That’s
all that matters, right?
 

I decide that soon, I’ll sit down and
tell him all of these things.
 

But not right now.
 
Because right now, I
have to find Finn.
 

We pull right up outside the hole in the
fence and then we duck through it.
 

I take off at a run through the park,
headed straight for the old house of horrors.
 
Dare runs with me, easily keeping
pace.
 

“There isn’t a car here,” he points out
to me as we jog.
 
Our wet shoes
squeak on the midway.
  

I know his point is logical, but I know
in my heart that Finn is here.
 

I know like a sister knows, like a
twin.
 

I don’t deviate from my path, and within
a couple of minutes, I’m standing on the porch of Nocte, bent over to catch my
breath.
 

Dare runs his hand up and down my back,
relaxing my muscles as my lungs fill with air. He’s my air.
 
I give him a grateful look,
then
push forward, through the door and into the abandoned
house.

I hadn’t thought to bring a flashlight
this time, but luckily, enough light shines through the dirty windows that we
can see where we’re going.

“Finn!” I call out as I race along, over
the electric cords and through the rooms. “Where are you?”

There’s no answer. But I still feel him
here.
 

“He’s here,” I tell Dare over my
shoulder. “I know it.
 
We have to
find him before he hurts himself.”

Dare nods and we race along the darkened
pathways, into the part of the house that I hadn’t shown Dare before.
 

I stop in the middle of a dusty parlor.
An empty noose swings from the chandelier above, while gargoyle’s faces leer
from the sides of the fireplace. I feel an instant air of relief that Finn
isn’t hanging from the rope.
 
Shivering, I scan the place.
 
Once upon a time, a “rotting” butler walked through this room, scaring
visitors as they passed through. The room is empty now.

“He’s not here,”
Dare
tells me needlessly.
 

My shoulders drop and my breath exhales
and I sink into a dusty velvet sofa.
 

“Where is he?” my voice is frail and
threatens to break.
 

Dare sits next to me, his arm around my
shoulders and I turn into his chest because all of a sudden, I can’t keep it
together.
 
The weight of it is too
heavy.

All of the emotions I’ve been feeling
lately come crashing down.
 
The
desperation of wanting to help my brother, the rejection I’ve felt from Dare,
the anger I’ve felt toward my father.
 
It spirals around me, too much to bear, and I sob into Dare’s
shirt.
 

His hands are large as he comforts me, as
he pats my back and strokes my shoulder.

I feel comfort here in his arms, unlike
any comfort I’ve ever felt before.
 

He’s mine.
 
No matter what happens, I can’t lose
him.
 

The fear of that loss, even though it’s
imagined, floods me and I grab him.
 

“I can’t lose you, too,” I tell him, my
voice still strained.
 
“I’m sorry
that I can’t seem to hold things together.
 
I promise I’ll get a handle on things.
 
If you promise to stay.”
 
I pause and there’s silence and I stare
at him.
 
“Promise me, Dare.”

He looks at me oddly, and presses a kiss
to my forehead.
 
“Promise.”

His voice is so husky, and it strokes my
skin.
 
And it’s not enough. With
shaking hands, I reach for him, pulling him to me and his mouth, hot and minty,
closes over my own.

He kisses me with abandon, like he’s not
afraid of the consequences, like it’s only him and me, and there’s nothing else
around us. There is no Finn, there is no funeral home,
there
is no grief.

There is only Dare and Calla.
 

I inhale it, breathing it in my throat,
and holding it deep inside by my heart.

He starts to pull away, but I stop him
with a whisper.
 

“Please don’t.
 
I need you.
 
Make it all right.
 
Please. Make it all right.”

My whisper is broken and desperate, but I
don’t care.
 
Because
it gets me what I want.
 
Dare
clutches me to him, his hands stroking me everywhere, lingering over my hips,
my arms, my ribs, my breasts.
 

My hips lift to meet him, my pelvis
crushing his. But it’s an exquisite pressure, something that builds and builds
within me, begging for an eruption, screaming for a release.

“Please.”

I whisper one more time.

Dare groans, and touches me again, his
fingers finding me in the dark, long and smooth and cool.
 
I clutch his shoulders, trying to get
closer and closer, but I know I’ll never be close enough.
 
Even when he’s finally inside of my
body, it won’t be enough.
Because I want all of him.
 

Now.

I pull at the button on his jeans, at his
shirt, at his arms.

And he almost lets me.
 

Almost.

But then, with a ragged breath, he pulls
away.

I reach for him, but he shakes off my
arm.

“Give me a minute, Cal.”

I sit trying to breathe, as he does the
same.

All I can hear is our raspy breath as we
breathe
and breathe, until finally, Dare looks at me
again.
 

 
“I’m sorry for that.”

I’m incredulous.
 
“For what? For doing what I want?”

He shakes his head. “Don’t you
understand?
 
You’re completely
beside yourself over your brother. Do you really want to have sex in in a house
of horrors while you’re crying over Finn?”

 
“Isn’t that up to me?” I ask shakily,
trying to reach for him again, because
I
need him.
 
He won’t let me,
though.
 

“No,” he finally answers. “Not today.
You’re not thinking clearly.”
 

“I’m thinking clearly enough,” I answer
firmly, but I don’t move toward him again.
 
His face is set and determined.

“Why do you have to be such a gentleman?”
I demand.
 
“Is this a British
thing?”

He chuckles, able to laugh now. “I guess
it’s just a Dare thing.”

I roll my eyes and rub the chill away.

He stares at me hard. “Calla, when we…
when this happens, it’s not going to be in a house of horrors.
 
It’s going to be something you
remember.”

I look away, annoyed. “Shouldn’t that be
my choice to make?”

He smiles, humoring me.
 
“I’m trying to help you make a good
choice here, Cal. Work with me.”

I can’t help but chuckle too because he’s
trying to help me, in spite of myself.
 

“Most guys would’ve jumped at that, no
matter what,” I tell him snarkily as we climb to our feet.
 

Dare pauses, his eyes oh-so-dark. “But
those guys don’t love you. I do.”

I’m completely frozen, completely still
as that sinks in.

“You do?” I breathe.

He nods. “More every day. You’re like no
one I’ve ever met.
 
We’re not going
to rush this, Cal. Good things come to those who wait, remember?”

And with those simple words, every single
problem I have floats away, off of my neck, off of my chest.
 
I don’t even roll my eyes over the
ketchup reference.

Dare loves Calla.
 

It’s impossible.
 
But it’s real.

My feet and heart are light as we walk
back to the door, and just when we’re stepping out into the light, I see
something, something fluttering against the porch railing.
 

A red ticket.

I bend down and grab it, curious.

Quid Quo Pro.

“This is Finn’s favorite band,” I tell
Dare. “He was at their concert the night mom died.”

I turn around and stare at him, confusion
rippling through me.
 
Confusion, then realization.
 

“He was here, after all.”

Dare guides my elbow toward the steps.

“Well, he’s not here now.”

I can’t argue with that.

I stuff the ticket in my pocket and we
make our way home.
 

TRIGENTA
TRES

Finn

The rain pelting me by the ocean is cold, and the wind blows
it into my eyes.
 

IgnoreItIgnoreIt.
 

I do.
 
But I try and ignore the voices too.
It’s the story of my life.
 

They woke me up from my nap and
I know what I have to do.
 

 
It’sAlmostTimeAlmostTimeAlmostAlmostAlmost.
 

Yeah, I have to agree.
 
It’s almost
time
.
 

I’ve hidden the secret for so
long, it’s eating at me, clawing to get out and I almost can’t keep it inside
anymore.
 

I grip the St. Michael’s
medallion firmly in my hand and walk into the water, straight out without
pause.

DoItDoItDOITDoItDo.

Do it.
 

I dive under the waves and swim
straight down.
 
It’s at least twenty
feet down and the water grows murky before I see the faded red paint of the
car.
 
I swim to it, my oxygen
already starting to run out, and stick my head through the open passenger
door.
 

Reaching my hand in, I hang the
necklace on the rearview mirror.
 
It
dangles in the water, twisting and turning in the murk.
 

St. Michael’s face seems to mock
me.
 

Protect me?
 
I think not.
 

My lungs feel hot and swollen,
so I push off, away from the car toward the surface.
 
I burst through with a cough, the sun on
my face as though I’d never left.
 

Breathe.
 

I do.
 
I take deep hacking breaths and then
pull myself out of the water onto the damp sand of the beach.
 
I look back out at the choppy surface.
 

No one would ever know what lies
beneath that water.
 

You can’t see it.

But I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

But Calla doesn’t.