Nights with Uncle Remus (23 page)

“ ‘Ki, B'er Rabbit! wut dis is mek you blow so? Wut mekky you' bre't' come so?'

“ ‘Eh-eh! B'er 'Gater, I hab bin come 'pon' trouble. Dog, 'e do run un-a run me.'

“ ‘Wey you no fetch 'im 'long, B'er Rabbit? I is bin git fat on all da' trouble lak dem. I proud fer yeddy Dog bark, ef 'e is bin fetch-a me trouble lak dem.'

“ ‘Wait, B'er 'Gater! Trouble come bisitin' wey you lif'; 'e mekky you' side puff; 'e mekky you' bre't' come so.'

“ ‘Gater, he do flup 'e tail un 'tretch 'ese'f, un lahff. 'E say:

“ ‘I lak fer see dem trouble. Nuddin' no bodder me. I ketch-a dem swimp, I ketch-a dem crahb, I mekky my bed wey de sun shiün hot, un I do 'joy mese'f. I proud fer see dem trouble.'

“ ‘'E come 'pon you, B'er 'Gater, wun you bin hab you' eye shed; 'e come 'pon you fum de turrer side. Ef 'e no come 'pon you in da crik, dun 'e come 'pon you in da broom-grass.”

“ ‘Dun I shekky um by de han', B'er Rabbit; I ahx um howdy.'

“ ‘Eh-eh, B'er 'Gater! you bin-a lahff at me; you no lahff wun dem trouble come. Dem trouble bin ketch-a you yit.' ”

Daddy Jack paused to wipe his face. He had reported the dialogue between Brother Rabbit and Brother Alligator with considerable animation, and had illustrated it as he went along with many curious inflections of the voice, and many queer gestures of head and hands impossible to describe here, but which added picturesqueness to the story. After awhile he went on:

“B'er Rabbit, 'e do blow un 'e do ketch um bre't'. 'E pit one year wey Dog is bin-a bark; 'e pit one eye 'pon B'er 'Gater. 'E lissen, 'e look; 'e look, 'e lissen. 'E no yeddy Dog, un 'e comforts come back. Bumbye B'er 'Gater, e' come drowsy; 'e do nod, nod, un 'e head sway down, tel ma'sh-grass tickle 'e nose, un 'e do cough sem lak 'e teer up da crik by da root. 'E no lak dis place fer sleep at, un 'e is crawl troo da ma'sh 'pon dry lan'; 'e is mek fer da broom-grass fiel'. 'E mek 'e bed wid 'e long tail, un 'e is 'tretch 'ese'f out at 'e lenk. 'E is shed 'e y-eye, un opun 'e mout', un tek 'e nap.

“B'er Rabbit, 'e do hol' 'e y-eye 'pon B'er 'Gater. Him talk no wud; him wallup 'e cud; him stan' still. B'er 'Gater, 'e do tek 'e nap; B'er Rabbit 'e do watch. Bumbye, B'er 'Gater bre't', 'e do come
loud
; 'e is bin sno'
hard!
'E dream lilly dream; 'e wuk 'e fut un shek 'e tail in 'e dream. B'er Rabbit wink 'e y-eye, un 'e do watch. B'er 'Gater, he do leaf 'e dream bahine, un 'e sleep soun'. B'er Rabbit watch lil, wait lil. Bumbye, 'e do go wey fier bu'n in da' stump, un 'e is fetch some. 'E say ‘Dis day I is mek you know dem trouble; I is mek you know dem well.' 'E hop 'roun' dey-dey, un 'e do light da' broom-grass; 'e bu'n, bu'n—bu'n, bu'n; 'e do bu'n smaht.

“B'er 'Gater, 'e is dream some mo' lilly dream. 'E do wuk 'e fut, 'e do shek 'e tail. Broom-grass bu'n, bu'n; B'er 'Gater dream. 'E dream da sun is shiün' hot; 'e wom 'e back, 'e wom 'e belly; 'e wuk 'e fut, e' shek 'e tail. Broom-grass bu'n high, 'e bu'n low; 'e bu'n smaht, e' bu'n hot. Bumbye, B'er 'Gater is wek fum 'e dream; 'e smell-a da' smoke, 'e feel-a da' fier. 'E run dis way, 'e run turrer way; no diffran' wey 'e is run, dey da' smoke, dey da fier.
Bu'n, bu'n, bu'n!
B'er 'Gater lash 'e tail, un grine 'e toof. Bumbye, 'e do roll un holler:

“ ‘Trouble, trouble, trouble!
Trouble, trouble!
'

“B'er Rabbit, 'e is stan' pas' da' fier, un 'e do say:

“ ‘Ki! B'er 'Gater! Wey you fer l'arn-a dis talk 'bout dem trouble?'

“B'er 'Gater, 'e lash 'e tail, 'e fair teer da' ye't,
⁴⁶
un 'e do holler:

“ ‘Oh, ma Lord! Trouble!
Trouble, trouble, trouble!
'

“ ‘Shekky um by de han', B'er 'Gater. Ahx um howdy!'

“ ‘Ow, ma Lord!
Trouble, trouble, trouble!
'

“ ‘Lahff wit' dem trouble, B'er 'Gater, lahff wit' dem! Ahx dem is dey he'lt' bin well! You bin-a-cry fer dey 'quaintun',
⁴⁷
B'er' 'Gater; now you mus' beer wit' dem trouble!'

“B'er 'Gater come so mad, 'e mek dash troo da' broomgrass; 'e fair teer um down. 'E bin scatter da' fier wide 'part, un 'e do run un dife in da' crik fer squinch da' fier 'pon e' bahk. 'E bahk swivel, 'e tail swivel wit' da' fier, un fum dat dey is bin stan' so. Bump, bump, 'pon 'e tail; bump, bump 'pon 'e bahk, wey da' fier bu'n.”

“Hit's des lak Brer Jack tell you, honey,” said Uncle Remus, as Daddy Jack closed his eyes and relapsed into silence. “I done seed um wid my own eyes. En deyer mighty kuse creeturs, mon'. Dey back is all ruffed up en down ter dis day en time, en mo'n dat, you aint gwineter ketch Brer Rabbit rackin' 'roun' whar de Yallergaters is. En de Yallergaters deyse'f, w'en dey years any crackin' en rattlin' gwine on in de bushes, dey des makes a break fer de creek en splunges in.'

“Enty!” exclaimed Daddy Jack, with momentary enthusiasm. “ 'E do tu'n go da' bahnk, un dife 'neat' da' crik. 'E bin so wom wit' da' fier, 'e mek de crik go si-z-z-z!”

Here Daddy Jack looked around and smiled. His glance fell on 'Tildy, and he seemed suddenly to remember that he had failed to be as polite as circumstances demanded.

“Come-a set nex' me, lilly gal. I gwan tell you one tale.”

“Come 'long, Pinx,” said 'Tildy, tossing her head disdainfully, and taking the little boy by the hand. “Come 'long, Pinx; we better be gwine. I done say I won't kill dat ole nigger man. Yit ef he start atter me dis blessid night, I lay I roust de whole plantation. Come on, honey; less go.”

The little boy was not anxious to go, but Uncle Remus seconded 'Tildy's suggestion.

“Better let dat gal mozey 'long, honey, kaze she mout start in fer ter cut up some 'er capers in yer, en I hate mighty bad ter bus' up dis yer axe-helve, w'ich I'm in needs un it eve'y hour er de day.”

Whereupon the two old negroes were left sitting by the hearth.

XXVII

'Tildy, the house-girl, made such a terrible report of the carryings on of Daddy Jack that the little boy's mother thought it prudent not to allow him to visit Uncle Remus so often. The child amused himself as best he could for several nights, but his playthings and picturebooks finally lost their interest. He cried so hard to be allowed to go to see Uncle Remus that his mother placed him under the care of Aunt Tempy—a woman of large authority on the place, and who stood next to Uncle Remus in the confidence of her mistress. Aunt Tempy was a fat, middle-aged woman, who always wore a head-handkerchief, and kept her sleeves rolled up, displaying her plump, black arms, winter and summer. She never hesitated to exercise her authority, and the younger negroes on the place regarded her as a tyrant; but in spite of her loud voice and brusque manners she was thoroughly good-natured, usually good-humored, and always trustworthy. Aunt Tempy and Uncle Remus were secretly jealous of each other, but they were careful never to come in conflict, and, to all appearances, the most cordial relations existed between them.

“Well de goodness knows!” exclaimed Uncle Remus, as Aunt Tempy went in with the little boy. “How you come on, Sis Tempy? De rainy season aint so mighty fur off w'en you come a-sojourneyin' in dis house. Ef I'd a-know'd you'd a-bin a-comin' I'd a-sorter steered 'roun' en bresh'd de cobwebs out'n de cornders.”

“Don't min' me, Brer Remus. Luck in de house whar de cobwebs hangs low. I 'uz des a-passin'—a-passin' 'long—en Miss Sally ax me ef I kin come fur ez de do' wid dat chile dar, but bless you, taint in my manners ter tu'n back at de do'. How you come on, Brer Remus?”

“Po'ly, Sis Tempy; en yit I aint complainiin'. Pain yer, en a ketch yander, wid de cramps th'ow'd in, aint no mo' dan ole folks kin speck. How you is, Sis Tempy?”

“I thank de Lord I'm able to crawl, Brer Remus, en dat's 'bout all. Ef I wa'n't so sot in my ways, deze yer niggers would er run me 'stracted d'reckly.”

Daddy Jack was sitting in the corner laughing and talking to himself, and the little boy watched him not without a feeling of awe. After a while he said:

“Uncle Remus, won't Daddy Jack tell us a story tonight?”

“Now, den, honey,” responded the old man, “we aint got ter push Brer Jack too closte; we ull des hatter creep up on 'im en ketch 'im fer er tale wence he in de humors. Sometime hoss pull, sometime he aint pull. You aint bin down yer so long, hit sorter look lak it my tu'n; kaze it done come 'cross my 'membunce dat dey wuz one time w'en Brer Wolf kotch Brer Rabbit, w'ich I aint never gun it out ter you yit.”

“Brother Wolf caught Brother Rabbit, Uncle Remus?” exclaimed the little boy, incredulously.

“Yasser! dat's de up en down un it, sho,” responded the old man with emphasis, “en I be mighty glad ef Sis Tempty yer will 'scuze me w'iles I runs over de tale 'long wid you.”

“Bless yo' soul, Brer Remus, don't pay no 'tention ter me,” said Aunt Tempy, folding her fat arms upon her ample bosom, and assuming an attitude of rest and contentment. “I'm bad ez de chillun 'bout dem ole tales, 'kase I kin des set up yer un lissen at um de whole blessid night, un a good part er de day. Yass, Lord!”

“Well, den,” said Uncle Remus, “we ull des huddle up yer en see w'at 'come er Brer Rabbit w'en ole Brer Wolf kotch 'im. In dem days,” he continued, looking at Daddy Jack and smiling broadly, “de creeturs wux constant gwine a-courtin'. Ef 'twan't Miss Meadows en de gals dey wuz flyin' 'roun', hit 'uz Miss Motts. Dey wuz constant a-courtin'. En 'twan't none er dish yer ‘Howdy-do-ma'm-I-speck-I-better-be-gwine,' n'er. Hit 'uz go atter brekkus and stay twel atter supper. Brer Rabbit, he got tuk wid a-likin' fer Miss Motts, en soon one mawnin', he tuck'n slick hisse'f up, he did, en put out ter call on 'er. W'en Brer Rabbit git ter whar Miss Motts live, she done gone off some'rs.

“Some folks 'ud er sot down en wait twel Miss Motts come back, en den ag'in some folks 'ud er tuck der foot in der han' en went back; but old Brer Rabbit, he aint de man fer ter be outdone, en he des tuck'n go in de kitchen en light he seegyar, en den he put out fer ter pay a call on Miss Meadows en de gals.

“W'en he git dar, lo en beholes, he fine Miss Motts dar, en he tipped in, ole Brer Rabbit did, en he galanted 'roun' mungs um, same lak one er dese yer town chaps, w'at you see come out ter Harmony Grove meetin'-house. De talk en dey laff; dey laff en dey giggle. Bime by, 'long todes night, Brer Rabbit 'low he better be gwine. De wimmen folks dey all ax 'im fer ter stay twel atter supper, kaze he sech lively comp'ny, but Brer Rabbit fear'd some er de yuther creeturs be hidin' out fer 'im; so he tuck'n pay his 'specks, he did, en start fer home.

“He aint git fur twel he come up wid a great big basket settin' down by de side er de big road. He look up de road; he aint see nobody. He look down de road; he aint see nobody. He look befo', he look behime, he look all 'roun'; he aint see nobody. He lissen, en lissen; he aint year nothin'. He wait, en he wait; nobody aint come.

“Den, bimeby Brer Rabbit go en peep in de basket, en it seem lak it half full er green truck. He retch he han' in, he did, en git some en put it in he mouf. Den he shet he eye en do lak he studyin' 'bout sump'n. Atter w'ile, he 'low ter hisse'f, ‘Hit look lak sparrer-grass, hit feel like sparrer-grass, hit tas'e lak sparrer-grass, en I be bless ef 'taint sparrer-grass.'

“Wid dat Brer Rabbit jump up, he did, en crack he heel tergedder, en he fetch one leap en lan' in de basket, right spang in 'mungs de sparrer-grass. Dar whar he miss he footin',” continued Uncle Remus, rubbing his beard meditatively, “kaze w'en he jump in 'mungs de sparrer-grass, right den en dar he jump in 'mungs ole Brer Wolf, w'ich he wer' quile up at de bottom.”

“Dar now!” exclaimed Aunt Tempy, enthusiastically. “W'at I tell you? W'at ‘make him pester t'er folks doin's? I boun' Brer Wolf nail't 'im.”

“Time Brer Wolf grab 'im,” continued Uncle Remus, “Brer Rabbit knowed he uz a gone case; yit he sing out, he did:

“ ‘I des tryin' ter skeer you, Brer Wolf; I des tryin' ter skeer you. I know'd you 'uz in dar, Brer Wolf. I know'd you be de smell!' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee.

“Ole Brer Wolf grin, he did, en lick he chops, en up'n say:

“ ‘Mighty glad you know'd me, Brer Rabbit, kaze I know'd you des time you drapt in on me. I tuck'n tell Brer Fox yistiddy dat I 'uz gwine take a nap 'longside er de road, en I boun' you 'ud come 'long en wake me up, en' sho' nuff, yer you come en yer you is,' sez Brer Wolf, sezee.”

“Oh-ho, Mr. Rabbit! How you feel now?” exclaimed Aunt Tempy, her sympathies evidently with Brother Wolf.

“W'en Brer Rabbit year dis,” said Uncle Remus, paying no attention to the interruption, “he 'gun ter git mighty skeer'd, en he whirl in beg Brer Wolf fer ter please tu'n 'im loose; but dis make Brer Wolf grin wusser, en he toof look so long en shine so w'ite, en he gum look so red, dat Brer Rabbit hush up en stay still. He so skeerd dat he bref come quick, en he heart go lak flutter-mill. He chune up lak he gwine cry:

“ ‘Whar you gwine kyar me, Brer Wolf?'