Lost in Flight (51 page)

Christina often wondered if her mother would be proud of her now.  If the ledger was balanced and she’d made up for her mother’s disappointment in her?  It had been one of Christina’s greatest regrets that her mother had died before she had a chance to redeem herself as an adult.

“My side of the family are taller,” continued an ever-increasingly embarrassing Dad, “and more well-built.  Great lungs run in our family.” 

Christina saw Riley shift in his seat and when she looked up at him, he had his eyes closed.  He was hunched over, pinching the bridge of his nose and Christina could tell he wanted to roll around the floor laughing.  She had been trying to stare her father out, to make him shut up, but he refused to be cowered.

“It’s why Christina has such a strong voice for a woman.  She’s hard to define as a singer because she’s a soulful, mezzo/soprano with a tasteful vibrato, and a rich velvety tone.  Her clarity of register… upper soprano to stratospheric falsetto is quite something and it’s all to do with lung capacity.  You see great lung capacity is the friend of the instrument,” rambled Dad to Andy James, who was looking at her father with a poker face. 

Johnny caught Christina’s eye and he smiled with a hint of mean.  Turning to Dad, Johnny asked, “Is great lung capacity like a flux capacitor?”  Dad looked at Johnny like he was insane, but Riley, Andy and Gabby were snickering in their seats. 

“What?  No.  Why would you say that?”  Dad snapped.

“Well,” said Johnny, “I just thought flux capacitor was a better term than ‘lung capacity’ because someone might think you’re talking about Christina’s boobs, Dad.”  Christina glared at Johnny wishing him a thousand deaths as everyone, except for her and Dad, snickered.

“God-sake,” Dad muttered, shaking his head.  “Bloody ridiculous.”

She knew it was mean, but it was so on.  Leaning over to Johnny, Christina eyeballed her brother and smiled.  “Hey Johnny, when Skynet finally takes over the world and the Terminators arrive, my flux capacitor will come in really handy, won’t it?” 

Johnny’s eyes went huge and his face darkened.  “That’s not funny, Christina.”

“Oh, I think it is,” she smiled. 

“Is not,” Johnny snapped. 

“Is funny, times infinity,” said Christina.

“Isn’t, infinity times 1,” quipped Johnny. 

“That’s still infinity, Johnny,” sneered Christina. 

“Shut up, Christina,” growled Johnny. 

Brother and sister glared at each other from across the table without saying another word.  Their stare-down was broken when Gabby giggled.  “Why don’t you tell everyone what you’ve been
doing
in Seattle, Christina?” 

She met her sister’s eyes that were dark and glinting.  A little smile played around the corners of Gabby’s mouth, but her demeanor, to the casual observer, was one of innocence.  Gabby batted her eyelids and then pointedly looked at Riley. 

“Sure, Gabby,” Christina grinned.  “But first, why don’t you tell Johnny what you’ve been purchasing with his credit card?” 

Gabby’s eyes went wide and then she scowled, before recovering.  “I, um,” Gabby said, but was interrupted by Johnny.

Staring at Gabby with a frown, he said, “What does she mean?” 

Gabby shrugged.  “I’ve bought lots of pop music and stuff, Johnny.  You know like Carly Rae Jepson’s, “Call me maybe” and Justin Bieber.  Stuff you won’t like.”  

Johnny groaned.  “On my card?”

Pffft
, thought Christina,
if he didn’t like that, she couldn’t wait to see his reaction when the porn came up on his next bill
.  The thought made her snort out loud, which brought attention back to her. 

“I agree, Dina,” said Johnny with a smirk.  “They suck.” 

He knew full well Christina enjoyed pop music and she wasn’t going to be roped into his musical arrogance.  Johnny’s comments were met with “true”, “seriously” and “word” from Riley, Andy, LiLi, and Dad.  If there was one thing Christina disliked, it was snobbery and also, she actually liked “Call me maybe.”

“What’s wrong with happy pop music?” she retorted.  “You’re just pretentious music snobs.  Not everyone likes alt-rock, with angst ridden lyrics about broken hearts, horrible women and the end of the world you know.” 

It was meant as a dig at Johnny, but to her surprise Riley, Dad and Johnny reacted with a “HEY.” 

“I’m just saying,” Christina shrugged, “there’s a place for happy songs too.”

Johnny’s expression softened and he picked up LiLi’s hand, kissing it.  “True, Dina.  There is a place for happiness.”  LiLi beamed at him and he placed his hands on her stomach, kissing her on the temple.

Dad clutched Tessa’s hand and they smiled at one another.  Christina felt the chili turn in her stomach.  She noticed Riley didn’t move to take her hand, so she ignored it, even though it irritated her. 

“Have you picked out any names for the baby?”  Tessa ventured, trying to steer the conversation back in a more pleasant direction.

“We’ve got some in mind,” said Johnny not taking his eyes off LiLi.  “Haven’t we, babe?” 

LiLi nodded and was about to speak when Dad interrupted.  “If it’s a boy, the name will be Jonathan.  All first-born Martin boys are called Jonathan – like you and me Johnny, and my father, and his father before him.” 

Johnny frowned and LiLi looked at him for reassurance.  “Well, Dad,” said Johnny, “It’s one of the options.” 

Dad threw down his napkin.  “
One
of the options?  Tradition is important, Johnny.  You were named Jonathan because you are the eldest son of the eldest son.  Christina was named after both her grandmothers.  My mother was Christine and Bettina was your mother’s, mother’s name, so we combined it.”

“Didn’t you want to call Christina, Yoko Ono, Dad?”  Johnny asked. 

“No,” said Dad, “I wanted Yoko as a middle name, but your mother wouldn’t hear of it.  We agreed on Melody.”  Christina was eternally grateful.  School was hard enough without being saddled with Yoko for a middle name.

“I also wanted to call you Lennon, Johnny, but your mother insisted we maintain tradition.” 

“Lennon is a pretty cool name,” grinned Johnny. 
It is
, thought Christina,
but imagine if he’d been Lennon and she’d been Yoko?
  It was too horrible to contemplate.  What a bag of laughs that would have been?

“When Gabby came along, we named her after your mother and my grandmother.  Gabriella Rose,” Dad beamed, “a beautiful name for a beautiful girl.  I wanted to call her Marianne Faith, after Marianne Faithfull, but your mother wouldn’t go for that either.”  Dad shook his head and frowned.  “You see Marianne Faithfull had been a bit loose with Mick Jagger and some chocolate bars.  Your mother thought it was too rude.” 

As Riley, Johnny, and Andy made suppressed snorting noises through their noses, Gabby groaned, and cursed under her breath.  Christina wanted the evening to end.  It was exhausting. 

She leaned over and grabbed a cinnamon roll saying to Tessa, “These are great.” 

Tessa smiled widely and held Christina’s eyes, “Thank you, Christina.  Would anyone else like one?”  Tessa shared the tray around and the rolls disappeared almost immediately. 

Christina smiled a “thank you” at Tessa, who winked at her.  For once, there was peaceful silence in the Martin household as everyone ate, but it didn’t last long.  As the night wore on, Gabby suggested lighting the fire. 

Dad thought that was a great idea and then his face changed.  Glaring at Christina and Johnny he asked, “Did one of you two light the fire when I was gone?”  Both looked confused and said, “no.” 

“Well,” said Dad, “someone did.  I found some burnt blue material with melted plastic.  Accelerant was used – what kind of bloody idiot does that?”  Dad shook his head.  “Very dangerous when a house has just been freshly painted.  I thought everyone knew that, but obviously not.” 

Christina went still and didn’t react.  She had actually forgotten she’d burnt her dress after her night with Riley and had never considered it might have been a fire risk.  Instead she chased crumbs around the table with her fingers, trying not to make eye contact with anyone.

********************

Riley

“So, you’re from Italy?”  Gabby smiled at LiLi.

“Yes, from Rimini,” LiLi smiled.

Gabby arched an eyebrow.  “I’ve never been to Italy, but I’d love to go.”

“Is very beautiful,” LiLi beamed and her eyes went misty.

“It is,” Johnny grinned and stared lovingly at LiLi.

“Where did you meet?”  Gabby asked. 

LiLi looked at Johnny and smiled.  “We meet after a concert through friends.” 

“Oh,” said Gabby, “do we know them?”

LiLi looked to Riley helplessly and back at Gabby.  “I not sure.  I got a backstage pass and meet Johnny then.  We been together ever since.”

Gabby had a dark gift for secrets and he was grateful LiLi was being diplomatic.  The mutual friend had been Riley’s ex-girlfriend.  He wasn’t sure if Gabby knew or if she was trolling. 

Since Christina, Riley had had hook ups, short-term relationships, and one serious girlfriend, Bianca.  He’d even contemplated marrying her, but six months ago, they’d broken up.  When it came down to it, he just couldn’t do it.  He still cared for Bianca, but he had no regrets over the way things turned out.  Riley just didn’t want Gabby blurting everything out to upset Christina before he’d had a chance to discuss things with her.

It could have been worse Riley consoled himself, but not by much.  The evening was uncomfortable with a real edge to it and it was one comment away from turning ugly.  The Martins were like herding cats.  Tessa and LiLi would try to steer the conversation into safer areas to little avail.  Just as you thought you were on safe ground, one of the Martins would come out hissing and spitting, yowling insults at one another. 
God-damn-it.

Riley had no intention of being in the middle of it, if that happened, and he didn’t want to be the focus of it either.  He kept giving sideways glances to Christina and she looked miserable.  She was tracing patterns on the table with her finger, refusing to make eye contact with anyone.  He hadn’t seen all the Martins together in one room for years and he knew they were just sorting out things, but he wished they could do it another way.

As if Johnny read his thoughts, he went and got his guitar.  Johnny closed his eyes and started strumming into the uncomfortable silence.  Looking up at Christina and Gabby, Johnny said, “You know Pumped up kicks?” 

Both nodded and Johnny launched into an acoustic version singing the first verse, with the girls harmonizing on the chorus.  On the second verse, Johnny nodded at Christina and she sung without protest.  Gabby sang the last verse and they ended singing together.

Riley made eye contact with LiLi who raised her eyebrows and grinned.  When they’d finished, he saw LiLi about to make comment and he shook his head subtly at her.  He liked LiLi and didn’t want her to become the focal point of the Martins’ barbs when they were in this mood.  He hoped music would calm the Martin savage beasts, but he wasn’t counting on it.

Jack grabbed his guitar as well and they launched into the Fray’s “How to save a life” with the Martin kids singing a verse each.  Christina sang the middle parts holding it altogether and a light bulb went off in Riley’s mind.  Bonnie had told him that Christina was holding everything together, but he hadn’t really understood the significance until now.  He wondered if she knew that, and how important her place in the family was.

When the Martins finished “How to save a life” Riley nudged Andy and they got up to leave.  Riley almost laughed out loud when he heard Andy say, “Thank you for a nice evening everyone.  I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

Once Riley had control over the laughter threatening to escape him, he thanked everyone for dinner and nudged Christina on the arm, asking her to follow him outside.  He watched Andy go over to speak to Gabby, so Riley grabbed Christina by the hand and took her outside, so they could have five minutes alone.  “Are you okay, babe?” Riley asked.  “That was, agh, a pretty interesting evening.”

Christina gave a big sigh and pulled a face, which was a combination of exasperation and misery.  Riley took her in his arms, kissed her on the forehead and rested his chin on the top of her head.  “I hate the person I become here, Riley,” Christina said, “it’s like everything comes up and I feel like a surly teenager again.” 

He laughed.  “I liked that surly teenager” and she giggled too. 

Riley pulled her closer and she placed her head on his shoulder, wrapping her arms around his waist.  “We never talk about anything – well, anything significant anyway.  We tip toe around all the big stuff, making jokes, slinging insults, and singing songs.  It drives me crazy.”

“Well, change the rules, babe,” Riley said.  “If you want to talk about the big stuff – then talk.  No one is going to talk about anything unless someone starts it.  If they don’t listen – that’s fine.  At least you’ve said your piece.” 

“I’m worried they’ll laugh at me,” Christina said, “and then I’ll storm off, and we won’t see each other again for years.  Dad and I are already the family jokes.”

“No, you’re not, Christina,” Riley said.  “I was with Johnny when he got the call about Gabby.  He called you before he called anyone else.” 

Christina groaned and her voice broke, “I ignored his calls because I was too busy at work.” 

Riley shook his head, “It doesn’t matter, Dina.  It’s what you did when you found out that counts.”  Sighing, Riley said, “I thought Johnny was going to have a meltdown.  He paced the room thrusting his hands through his hair without saying a word for hours.  LiLi and I were worried he was going to have a relapse.” 

He felt Christina shudder and he agreed.  “Yeah.  It was pretty scary.  We organized his flight to Seattle and I went with him to make sure he was okay.  He only got his shit together when you called.” 

As Christina started to cry, Riley held her tighter.  “You need to understand your importance to your family, Dina.  The role you play.  Forget the annoying stuff they do okay?  I don’t know why they do it.  I think it’s just their way of showing affection.”  He heard her laugh and he did as well.  “But never think you’re a joke to them or don’t matter.  Your father is so proud of you and Gabby idolizes you.”