Lights and Shadows (Oregon In Love) (23 page)

Silence stretched awkwardly between them.

“
Do you have any special plans for the holidays?” he
finally asked.

She shook her head. “I’ll be working here. I have to
finish up by Christmas.” She swallowed. “What about you?”

“
I plan to stay with friends in Maupin.”

“
The same ones I met?”

He nodded.

“
Please tell them hello for me.”

Marc stifled an absurd urge to invite her along with
him. “I will.” Her uncertain smile, failing to reach her eyes,
saddened him.
What have I done?

“
Well...” said Julia, obviously uncomfortable. “I
hope you have a nice time.”

He shrugged. “Bye, Julia.”

“
Um, bye.”

Marc turned and walked away. A few feet from the door,
he looked over his shoulder and saw her watching him. Julia jerked
her gaze away, but not before he imagined seeing a glimpse of
wistfulness there.

***

The day before he planned to leave for Maupin, Marc had
an appointment with his editor to discuss an idea for another book.
He wanted to do one featuring a photographic essay of Oregon rivers.
Sitting in a booth in a corner of the restaurant, he checked his
watch and frowned. He glanced around the trendy Italian restaurant
Nathan had suggested they meet at for lunch. His editor was a half an
hour late.

Marc wondered why either of them bothered trying to meet
before the holidays, but this was the time Nathan’s secretary had
given him. He sighed, tired of looking up expectantly as each party
of people passed, only to be disappointed when it wasn’t Nathan.
After another fifteen more minutes had elapsed, Marc wondered if he’d
mixed up his days.

“
This way please.”

Hearing the waitress, Marc leaned forward, hoping his
editor would appear any moment. But when he saw who the waitress led
in, he leaned back in the booth, his hands gripping the edge of the
table. Julia and her partner breezed past him and were seated at a
table, angled away from his booth.

Marc didn’t have to worry he might be seen. It looked
to him like Julia had eyes for no one but the blond man. When he saw
him take her hand and lift it to his lips, a red mist swam before his
eyes. Unwilling to witness such a scene, Marc rose and left the
dining room. In the lobby, he called Nathan’s office. The secretary
apologized, saying she’d tried to reach him and reschedule the
appointment due to Nathan coming down with a case of the flu. She
instructed him to call back and reschedule after the holidays.

Marc wearily pocketed his phone and made his way to his
truck.
Talk about stab and twist
. He rolled his eyes to the
heavens.
God, was that really necessary?

***

Julia looked at her hand, wrapped in Spencer’s larger
one. Carefully schooling her expression, she slowly raised her eyes.
“Spencer,” she said softly, “I can’t tell you how much I
value the time we’ve had to work together. Without your help and
persistence and your savvy, this project would’ve floundered.”
She paused, taking a surreptitious breath. “And the friendship
that’s grown out of our business relationship means a lot to me.”

“
Friendship,” he said dubiously. His thumb ran
lightly over her fingers. “I’ve maintained a professional
distance from you for months, Julia. Now that the assignment is
essentially complete, I had hoped your feelings would’ve grown
beyond friendship.”

“
You’re a wonderful man, Spencer, but—” she
paused and swallowed, trying to think of a way to discourage his
romantic notions without hurting him.

With a heavy sigh, he released her hand and leaned back
in his chair. “But I’m not a certain photography instructor.”

Julia’s eyes widened and she began to protest. Spencer
held up his hand.

“
I’m not blind. I’ve seen the way you two look at
each other. It’s like you’re both starving and you view each
other as a five-course meal.”

Julia flushed and shook her head. “It’s not that
bad,” she said with a strained smile.

“
He’s an idiot for letting you get away.”

Her smile vanished. “Spencer, please—”

“
I’m sorry,” he said quietly. “Since I’m
unable to tempt you, I at least hope all your affection won’t be
wasted. Maybe something will work out between you two after all.”
His eyes darkened as he took her hand once again. Touching his lips
to her fingers, he smiled. “But if you ever change your mind...”

Julia didn’t trust herself to speak. She bit her lip.
So many
if only’s
.

***

When Marc arrived back at his apartment later that day,
there were two messages from the friends he’d made plans with. The
flu bug had apparently struck in eastern Oregon as well. While he was
disappointed he wouldn’t see them, he also felt a measure of
relief. He just wasn’t in the holiday mood. After calling them back
and offering sympathy and regret, he wondered what to do next. A
hiking trip in the Mt Hood National Forest would perhaps tire him out
so he wouldn’t spend the next several days in useless
introspection. He quickly packed, left a message on his voicemail of
his whereabouts, and headed to the mountain.

Once bundled against the cold in the quiet world of a
winter forest, some of the tension drained from his body. Marc
trekked well-established trails, easily accessible from the road.
Only the sifting patter of snowfall, the crunch of his boots, and the
sound of his own breathing broke the silence.

The quiet beauty of the surrounding landscape served to
hush his soul and he used the opportunity to pray, specifically about
Julia. Instead of trying to untangle the mess, he poured out all his
confusion, doubt, and heartache before the Lord, releasing it
completely to Him. As he looked up at the blanketed trees, to the
winter sun piercing through the upper boughs, a sweet peace stole
into his heart. He realized this was something he should’ve done a
long time ago. It might’ve saved him—and Julia—a lot of
anguish.

***

After returning to Portland once Christmas was over,
Marc began preparing for his classes. When he sat down to prepare his
curriculum, he found he’d forgotten a key text book at the college.
He decided to drive out to Northwest and pick it up.

With only a few days before the new year, the halls were
virtually deserted. In his classroom, Marc located the book and
slipped it into his briefcase before heading back out to his truck.

On his way past the administrative offices, he heard
someone talking about Julia. He came to a sudden, silent stop. Unable
to withstand a desire to know what they were saying, he stood just
outside the office door, listening to the two female voices.

“
Wilcox?”

“
You know, that consultant woman working with Spencer
Meyers. They discovered one of the auditors embezzled nearly five
million dollars from the college coffers. They spent all night
together cracking the case.”

“
Are you kidding? How do you know?”

“
I saw them come out of his office that morning. She
had on the same cute Nicole Miller dress she’d worn the day before.
And Mr. Meyers was in dire need of a shave. They seemed pretty cozy
to me. You figure out the rest.”

“
Maybe they really were just working,” the voice
said half-heartedly.

A snort from the other. “Tell me, if you were in a
small room with Spencer Meyers all night long, would you spend the
whole time number crunching?”

The woman laughed. “I see your point.”

Marc woodenly moved from the door and headed down the
main staircase. His mind spun in a hundred different directions as
his new-found hope took a beating. While he knew Julia was innocent
of the innuendo portrayed in the gossip, that didn’t stop a sick
feeling from forming in the pit of his stomach.

Before he had time to deal with the blow, he suddenly
saw Julia before him. She came up the stairs at a brisk pace, her
arms filled with expandable files. Her expression seemed unfocused
and she rushed right past, apparently without seeing him.

Wondering if she had simply chosen to ignore him, Marc
looked back at her. When she reached the top step, she came to a
halt. Marc watched in shock as the files cascaded from her arms. She
seemed to collapse in slow motion. As she toppled backward, he darted
up the few steps between them and caught her just before her head
slammed into the steps. Breathing heavily at the close save, he stood
immobile for a moment with Julia limp in his arms.

Marc lifted her up and began a slow descent down the
stairs. One of the office workers, who’d witnessed the scene,
rushed along side him, directing him into a nearby staff room. He
gently set Julia on one of the couches, his alarm mushrooming at her
utter stillness.

“
Should I call an ambulance?” the woman behind him
asked.

Marc picked up one of Julia’s icy hands and felt for
her pulse on the inside of her wrist. He was no doctor, but her pulse
seemed shallow to him. “Um, I think she just passed out. Let’s
give her a minute.” Curling her hand around his fingers, he softly
called her name. After a moment, she began to stir.

“What’s going on? What’s wrong with Julia?”

Marc looked up to see Spencer striding into the room.
“I...think she fainted.”

Spencer flashed him a dark look. “I can take over from
here.”

His dismissive tone and possessive attitude toward Julia
galled Marc. It took considerable self-control to keep his mouth
shut. Julia blinked in confusion and struggled to sit up. He turned
and left the room.

***

“
What happened?” Julia asked groggily.

Spencer hunkered down next to her and took her hand in
his. “You fainted,” he said gently.

She looked up at him, bewildered. “I was on the
stairs...”

The office worker spoke up. “One of the instructors
caught you and brought you in here.”

Instinctively thinking of Marc, she looked around the
room for him. She was keenly disappointed when she didn’t see him.

“
Why don’t you lean back your head and rest for a
while,” Spencer urged.

“
I’m fine. Besides, I must’ve dropped all my
files.”

“
I’ll take care of it, you don’t need to worry. In
fact, I want you to take the rest of the afternoon off.”

Julia sat up fully and set her feet on the floor.

“
I don’t think you’re ready to stand yet. Take it
easy.”

“
I’m fine,” she said firmly.

Spencer shook his head. “Let me drive you home.”

“
That’s not necessary.”

“
Julia—”

“
Please
,” she said, her eyes pleading with
him for understanding. “This is embarrassing enough as it is. I’ll
get home fine, okay?”

He considered the idea for a moment, then rose. “Stay
here at least until I get the files picked up.”

She nodded and waited for him to return. Fifteen minutes
later, when he came back into the lounge, he had her purse and
briefcase with him.

“
You don’t need to take those files home tonight. I
locked them in my office.”

Julia smiled wanly. “Thank you, Spencer.” She
carefully stood up, trying to disguise her continued wooziness. “But
I’ll be fine. If I feel dizzy, I’ll pull right off the road.”

“
Then let me help you to your car.”

“
You’re sweet, but
really
, I can manage. I
just got a little light-headed, that’s all.”

Spencer stuffed his hands in his pockets. “Has anyone
ever told you you’re unbelievably stubborn?”

She gave him a shaky smile. “I refuse to answer that
on the grounds it may incriminate me.”

“
You’re sure you feel well enough to drive?”

“
Positive.”

“
Well, then, drive slow and cautious.”

“
Of course.”

“
You forget, I’ve been in a car with you.”

She squeezed his hand. “Thank you for being so
concerned.”

Before he could change his mind and follow her out,
Julia walked as quickly as she dared out of the building. When she
went around the building to where her car was parked, she found Marc
leaning on the driver’s side door of her Camry. He walked up to
her, took her briefcase, and held out his hand.

Julia licked her suddenly dry lips. He was so close, she
could feel the warmth emanating from his body. “I’m okay,” she
croaked, feeling hot and cold by turns.

Marc continued to hold out his hand. “The keys,
Julia.”

Her temper flared. “You can’t force me to let you
drive. Besides, how will you get back?”

“
I’ve taken care of that. Now unless you want a
scene, I suggest you give me the keys.”

Julia lifted her chin. With exaggerated slowness, she
fished her keys out of her purse and dropped them into his palm. He
unlocked the door and settled her into the passenger seat, apparently
indifferent to her fulminating glare. Back on the other side, Marc
slid behind the wheel and started the engine.