LEMNISCATE (22 page)

“You’re forgiven.” As soon as I whispered it back, I could feel the weight of guilt slip from her shoulders and cautiously, she reached for my hand and gave it a squeeze before sliding onto the back seat of Nate’s car.

“I’ll meet you at home, Mom. I’d like to go with Garreth.” I was certain she would argue, having not known my whereabouts for an entire night, but she only smiled gently and nodded.

The sweet scent of incense enveloped me the moment I climbed into the Jeep, but even as it tried to comfort me, I couldn’t help relive the horror in my head. I traced the lemniscate on my hand over and over, thinking of something I could have done to save Hadrian, but there was nothing. Hadrian knew I could help him become the guardian he was meant to be, and that I would be his undoing.

‘My unfortunate fate.’

I could feel Garreth’s warm gaze on me as he started the car and I quietly turned my head to meet it. He reached over and guided my head onto his shoulder, letting me rest. His scent was soothing and calming and I breathed in its effect. Sighing, I let the tension and fear I had harbored flood out of me – knowing that it was his way of gradually helping me heal. I smiled into his shoulder. In the days that would follow, we would all heal, and in time, everything would be all right.

I
t was Monday and the final bell had already hummed its warning throughout the building. I was still fuddling with the combination on my locker when I felt a warm body slide up next to me.

“So, you’re okay?”

I looked over to see Ryan leaning against the neighboring locker and was happy to see the last of his bruises were completely gone. He still had dark circles beneath his eyes, but the evidence of his rocky ordeal these last few months was long gone, at least on the outside.

“Ryan, it’s been two weeks,” I playfully rolled my eyes and yanked hard on the metal lever.

“You ask me this every day.”

He chuckled, sliding his backpack higher onto his shoulder. “I can’t help it. You had me worried.” Ryan paused, staring out into the hallway for half a second. “But you are okay, aren’t you?”

“Yes,” I insisted. “I’m fine.” He was never going to forgive me for dropping him off after the dance and battling evil without him. A cold shiver went down my back at the thought. What if he had gone with me? Ryan may never have made it out of there. The fears he stored in his mind were permanent and left marks of their existence. Still, I had called him the Sunday after, to fill him in. Actually, I would have called him Saturday, but I slept the entire day.

“So what’s the news?”

“My aunt is officially my guardian. Social Services called first thing this morning,” he said with a grin.

“Ryan, that’s great! Your aunt seems really nice; you’ll be in good hands.” I let out an involuntary chuckle.

“What’s so funny?”

Clearly, he was overlooking the irony.

“Well, it’s just that when I lost my guardian angel, you stood in; now it seems you’re being rewarded with your own.”

“Yeah, she’s already feeling comfortable in her new role. She made me homemade biscuits and canadian bacon at the crack of dawn this morning. And my laundry is always folded on my bed. Weird.”

He was already reveling in his new life and deserved to be taken care of. I could only hope the years of abuse would become a bad dream of the past.

“You know,” he whispered, leaning in closer as I shut my locker for the day. “She even hugs me. For no reason. Just because.”

“You need lots of hugs, Ryan. Hugs are good for you.”

Ryan smiled, agreeing. He wouldn’t admit it out loud, but he knew it too.

“So, Garreth is back, huh?” I followed his eyes down the hall to see my blonde-haired angel making long strides toward us.

“He is.”

“And . . . Hadrian?”

I looked down at my shoe and bit my lip, feeling an unexpected catch in my throat.

“Sorry, Teagan, I know what you went through must have been hard.”

I looked up into his eyes just as Garreth was upon us and nodded.

“Back to normal, right?” Garreth said softly while flashing a smile at Ryan. Once upon a time, they would have been enemies, but not today.

“I’m still getting used to
normal
.” Ryan turned to me. “Just so you know, I’m still keeping my day job. Can’t give it up yet. Catch up with you later, Tea. See you, Garreth.”

I watched my friend walk away to his next class. It was nice to finally acknowledge that.
My friend.

Garreth looked at me curiously. “Day job?”

“You may have competition; he’s the best watch dog around,” I said with a smile. “I just think he’s afraid of losing me, like he did Claire.”

Garreth understandingly slipped his warm hand into mine.

“So how did you make out on the calculus test?”

“Can you believe I aced it? I didn’t even study. Actually this morning, I didn’t even remember that I had a test today.”

A smile spread across Garreth’s perfectly angular face. “See, now you’re the one with infinite knowledge.”

We rounded the corner past the locker quad at the far end the hall, when Brynn came barreling into the two of us. She was giddy and bubbly.

“Did you see it? It’s huge and perfect! I got to help pick it out!”

Scores of fellow students were walking past and lingered around to hear more. Number one, seeing Brynn excited was unusual. Seeing her share that excitement with me was mind blowing.

“I did, actually. You did an amazing job; it’s breathtaking.” I was trying to ignore the crowd of rubberneckers, especially the three standing against the water fountain. Brynn completely brushed off the fact that not only was she making a spectacle in front of half the student body, but she wasn’t sharing her juicy news with her old friends at all.

Sage, Lauren and Emily’s eyes widened in the same high, disbelieving arc, but neither came over to ask what the commotion was about. That’s alright. Let them wonder. After all, a rumor is more fun to spread when you don’t have the story straight.

“Okay, so you’re coming over today, right?” Brynn’s arm linked through mine as Garreth and I began our trek out to the parking lot.

“Yeah, sure. You’re getting a baking lesson, right?”

Brynn’s face lit up as she thought about the afternoon ahead. “She’s going to teach me how to make those lemon bars of hers.”

My mouth couldn’t help watering at the thought of my mother’s lemon bars. It was heaven in a little yellow square when you bit into one of those. I could just picture the happiness oozing out of my mom’s entire being knowing that Brynn was genuinely interested in learning how to bake one of her top secret recipes. I quietly calculated the lesson in my head. With Brynn and my mom in the kitchen, that would give me approximately twenty minutes to speak with Nate. As Brynn was excited about the time she was going to spend with my mom making a delectable dessert, I was equally looking forward to Nate finally showing me the contents of his ever-secretive journal.

“You know,” Brynn paused, eyeing the two of us. “You really are good for each other.” Then she bounded off, waving goodbye.

“Hellooo—earth to Teagan.” Garreth stopped me and took my face in his hands.

“Oh, sorry, just thinking.”

“It’s a lot isn’t it?”

“Overwhelming.”

“The fact that your mother has agreed to marry Dr. Dean, or the fact that he’s about to share some information?”

“Both, I guess. You know he’s been filling her in, little by little. He’s shown her the journal.”

His Jeep Wrangler was a few parking spaces away, and for some reason, I couldn’t get there fast enough.

“Surprisingly, she’s okay with it all,” I offered. “I wasn’t sure how she would handle it, but she says a lot of things that happened make sense now. Nate has a way of explaining that she’s always admired.”

“Hmm.” His reflection on what I had just said took me off guard.

“What?”

“It’s just that there’s a lot of irony going around today.”

“What do you mean?” I turned in my seat, facing him, grateful that the end of the school day madness was shut out by the window.

“Well, Ryan and his aunt. There’s a guardian role being played out there.” He paused at my raised eyebrows. I had almost forgotten that he knew everything, even conversations he wasn’t present for. Garreth would always be witness to everything I said or did.

“Then,” he continued, “there’s the matter of your mother. She’s accepting the impossible in order to close a door that will in essence, open another. While you are taking on every aspect of that closed door and reopening it to find a new future.”

I let it sink in.

There were no more secrets. My mother knew. She knew about Garreth being my guardian; she knew about my mark. Suddenly, I couldn’t have felt more relieved.

Brynn buzzed around her kitchen like a little bee, stopping to check the list of ingredients my mother had given her ahead of time. Muttering to herself, she checked the temperature on the oven, “350 degrees, preheating. Check. Oh!” She opened the wide utensil drawer in the center island and pulled out a stainless steel can opener, then recounted the cans of lemon pie filling.

“You can bring boxes over anytime, you know. My room’s big enough to store them.” Brynn was determined to have us packed and moved in, even though it will still be a couple of weeks yet before my mom contacts a real estate agent for our house.

“I thought we were going to wait until after graduation to start packing.”

“I just like to be on top of things, that’s all,” and she continued fluttering about. Seeing this new side to Brynn made my head spin. Never mind the fact that she and I both had major finals to study for, and were getting the last of our college applications in the mail. On top of all that, we had graduation to look forward to. But if Brynn had it her way, my house would be sold, my mom and I moved in, and our parents happily married within a month’s time.

“You just want to have a say in the wedding plans, don’t you?” I asked a bit absentmindedly as I stared out the window for my mother’s car. I was anxious to speak with my future stepfather.

“Who me?” Brynn acted all innocent.

“Of course you! This is a party on the grandest of scales and you’re dying to be involved.”

“Well, maybe a little.”

At last I could hear the tiny pebbles crunching as my mom’s car pulled around to the back of the house. Simultaneously, Nate came padding down the hall from his study to greet her. I was nearly bouncing out of my seat.

“Hey, sweeties,” she said to Brynn and me; then she and Nate locked in an embrace that had both of us rolling our eyes.

“Well, I see you’re all ready for me, Brynn.”

“Yep, I have everything you told me to get.” She was all smiles, eager for some one-on-one time with the “cure” that would begin to fill the hole in her heart.

“Calculus test went okay?” she aimed at me, not forgetting to include daughter number one.

“Um, yeah. I got an A.”

“Well, ladies,” Nate found the opportune moment to interrupt. “You two better get baking. I’ve been salivating for these lemon bars for about a week now.”

Without any further discussion, my mother and Brynn set to work, and Nate wiggled his index finger for me to follow.

My feet knew the way to the study. I could find it with my eyes closed now if I had to. Once past the massive walnut door, he motioned for me to come sit on the settee. A roaring fire was already in the fireplace, and a warm glow stretched out from under the glass lampshade. There was no abnormal chill in the air, no sudden drop in temperature, no reason to drop to my knees to scan the immaculate hardwood floor for traces of black sand or other ritual components. Nate had made obvious attempts to make me comfortable and I smiled, appreciating his kindness.

I liked Nate, I had to admit. There had been a time when I honestly questioned if he was the reason behind Brynn’s dark secrets and motives. But now, we finally understood each other and I could clearly see why my mother was so enamored with him.

“I don’t need to tell you that going after Brynn that night was a measure beyond bravery. Nor do I need to mention that accepting her into your life now, after what you’ve been through, is an even more commendable act. Your history together has been long and trying, I’ve heard.”

“When you’re a child, everything is traumatic. I guess it takes a while to realize how silly it all is.”

His eyes seemed to recall a suppressed memory for a moment, perhaps the real reason for Brynn’s actions; the reason that would devastate a child enough to be willing to sell her soul.

“Teagan, you and I both know it lies deeper than that. Brynn’s actions, especially of late, have been inexcusable.”

“Well, as much as it would seem the more reasonable thing, I just can’t seem to bring myself to hate her any longer.”

“Ahh, she’s grown on you?” he asked with a smile that seemed slightly forced for my sake.

“I wouldn’t go that far. Yet.”

Without any glossing over, or lengthy preamble, he handed me the thick leather journal. His brown eyes were serious, yet soft, in the firelight.

I looked up at him appreciatively, still afraid to see the secrets he’d kept logged in his coveted book. All I’d learned these past months, about guardians and heaven and even hell, had been discovered by someone other than myself. It was all within these pages. I only had to take it and finally come to terms with the fact that my burden could finally be lifted.

“Go on, take it.”

I reached my hand out, then curled my fingers back.
What was wrong with me? What was I waiting for?
Then, deep breath inhaled and my fingers extended again, the smooth buttery feel of the leather was now in my hand. The book was softer than expected. After all these years, I expected it to feel cracked and dry, but instead it had become so worn with Nate’s entries, it was just the opposite.

I looked up at him, still reluctant to open it without permission, but his gentle expression urged me on.

“Do you want me to leave you alone with it?”