Kimber (13 page)

I
make arrangements for my mother’s urn to be placed in a mausoleum. I tell myself
it’s what she’d want. I know she isn’t really inside that urn and once I let it
go, I find peace in her memory.

The
holidays fly by. I celebrate Christmas with Amber and her dad. I ring in the
New Year downtown during First Friday with all my friends.

 Tiff
and Tommy get back together, not a shocker. Tommy popping the big question
however is an enormous surprise to everyone. No one saw that coming.

 Like
promised, Lena and I write each other on a weekly basis.

With
so much going on in my life, the thoughts I used to have of Leo go from every
minute to near nonexistent. Time passes so fast that before I even know it half
a year has passed and the month of June is upon me. My birthday sits just days
away. Unfortunately, with June here, I know that July will bring the first and
certainly not the last of years to come that I will have to recall the dreadful
day my life changed forever.

I
try not to focus on it. I put forth great effort to not think of how this year
will be my first without my mother. How so many rituals that we used to share
will go undone.

Thank
God for Luke. He reassures me that he is going all out for my nineteenth
birthday and that all our friends have played a part in making it a birthday I
will not forget.

 Rarely
do I not see Luke for a whole twenty four hours but the days leading up to my
birthday he stays very secretive. He only stops by if he’s in the area. Luke
never could keep a secret from me. He’s usually very eager to give me anything
if I ask, though I do not ask for nearly as much as he tries to give me. I know
he stays away to insure his secret stays just that.

            The day
before I celebrate my nineteenth birthday the girls and I take off to Tampa for
a little pampering time. Much like I would have done to Luke, I press the girls
for details of tomorrow’s events. Even they stay tight lipped.

            When given
the chance Tiffany changes the subject to her upcoming wedding. I can’t blame
her though. After all, it is the biggest day in a girl’s life. While enjoying
our pedicures and manicures we discuss Tiffany’s wedding. Everything from
flower arrangements, table settings, warm or dark colors, written vows or
traditional, is discussed.

After
being pampered, we head over to International Mall. I beg the girls for some
sort of clue for the proper birthday outfit.

 “Luke
really didn’t tell us as much as you think Kimber.” Amber says while she flips
through rack after rack of clothing.

 “Just
relax and know that you’re going to have an awesome time.” Robin says with a
smirk.

“Fine!
Just tell me if either one of these is appropriate.” I hold up two outfits. One
is a strapless dress with a deep purple floral design and the other a short
black mini cocktail dress with beading scattered on the front.

 “God!
Neither.” Tiffany criticizes, peeking her head out of the changing room.

I
toss my hands in the air. “I give up.”

“Give
me your card.” Amber demands holding her hand out.

“Why?”

 “You
and Robin go grab a coffee or something. Tiff and I will take care of how to
dress you.”

I
don’t question her. After all our years of friendship, I know the girls won’t
disappoint me.

“Happy Birthday!”

“It’s
not very happy when you call me at seven in the morning.” I mumble in a groggy
state.

“Every
year you wish your birthday would last longer. Well the earlier you’re up the
longer it lasts, right?”

 “You
take me too literal.”

“Alright
grumpy. I’ll let you go but first can you get up and look outside your door?”

“Why?”
I whine not willing to move even if the Pope himself is waiting in the hallway
with a birthday blessing.

“I
left you somethin’.”

“Can’t
you just tell me what it is?”

“No,
it’s a surprise.”

 “Fine.”

 I
force myself out of bed, annoyed with Luke’s overzealous attitude this early in
the morning. After fumbling with the deadbolt, I finally get the door open. My
unpleasant mood spikes as I see nothing awaiting me in the hallway. It’s not
the fact that there is no gift or card. It’s the aggravation of having gotten
up for nothing.

I’m
just about to slam the door shut when Luke jumps out of nowhere. The sight of
him immediately changes my attitude. My tall, handsome, blue eyed, wide smiling
boyfriend. My possible future stands before me holding exactly nineteen red
roses. He greets me with a warm hug and compassion in his lips as they softly
cover mine.

 “The
roses are beautiful. Thank you!”

“The
roses are nothin’ compared to you.”

I
smirk and smack him on the arm. I can only imagine what I look like with bed
head. I run off to the bathroom, brush my teeth, and pull my hair up. 

“Can
I know what the big surprise for today is?” I ask walking back into the living
room.

“Nope.
Not until we get there. I’ve tried very hard to keep this secret. So please
don’t tempt me.”

Seeing
an opening and not very willing to wait any longer, I flash a seductive smile
and attempt my best soft sexy voice. “Tempt you? Does this tempt you?” I say
reaching up to his shoulders while kneading my hands through his hair.  

“Kimber.”
He sighs.

I
don’t listen. I press my body against his. “Tempted?” I whisper and kiss him
again.

“In
more ways than one.” He says enjoying my position a little more than I had
expected him to. I feel the meaning of his words
literally
grow between
us.

 Luke
has waited so patiently for me. I know that I’m not his first girlfriend. I
witnessed him go through girls in high school like they were a course for extra
credit. I don’t care to know how many of those girls were notches on his belt.

I
can’t deny that whenever Luke and I do get close there is a part of me that
aches for him in ways that are definitely sexual. I know it’s not easy for guys
to go long periods without sex. At least that is what Tiffany tells me. Even
though Luke acts like it doesn’t bother him I know it does. It isn’t the right
time I’m looking for. I’m waiting for the emotions. I want to feel the same way
for Luke as he feels for me. I cannot give myself to him physically when I’m
still trying to give him a hundred percent mentally. I want our first time to
be love not just sex. 

            Not wanting
to tease him more than I already have in the past few months I release him and
step back.

            “Sorry.” I
say feeling foolish.

Luke
reaches for my chin, guiding my eyes to meet his. “Don’t ever be sorry. You’ve
already given me more than I deserve. Bein’ with you like this is all I need.
All I want.”

“I’m
just not ready yet.” I say using the same excuse as always. I know that no
matter how sweet or sincere his words are, it’s harder for him than he will
ever allow me to believe.

“I’m
not goin’ anywhere Kimber. When you are ready, it’ll be an amazin’ experience.”
He kisses my head. “Now on a lighter note, go get out of your pajamas. We’ve
got somewhere to be.” I smile and run off to get ready.

“Crap!”
I yell out when I realize Amber has the outfit I am suppose to wear today.

“What’s
wrong?”

 “Amber
has my clothes.”

 “Oh
yeah, I’m suppose to tell you she’s bringin’ ‘em. You can change when you get
there.”

How
am I supposed to look cute if I show up wherever Luke is taking me wearing
shorts and a tank top? I remind myself to have a little faith in Luke and
Amber. I hope they fully understand how I can let something as simple as a
wardrobe malfunction ruin my birthday. After all, if there is any day to be a
diva it has to be one’s birthday.

I
shower, remembering to shave my legs and dress in black and turquoise sleeveless
romper. I braid my hair to the side and step into black sandals. I give myself
a final glance in the mirror and decide it will just have to do. Once I’m as
ready as I can be, with butterflies swirling with anticipation in my stomach,
Luke and I head out, officially starting the day.

“A yacht!” 

“Do
you like it?” Luke asks.

The
sight of the massive white yacht as we pull into the marina blows me away.
Never in a million years would I have thought that this is what everyone was
hiding from me.

“Like
it? I love it! Thank you! Thank you!” I can’t help but wiggle in my seat as I
hold my face in my hands in disbelief.

“We
all chipped in to rent it for the day. I knew you wouldn’t expect it. I was a
little worried ‘cause I didn’t know if you get sea sick or not.”

 “I
guess we’ll find out. I’ve never been on one. I always thought these things
were reserved for millionaires or superstars. I didn’t know you could just rent
them.”

 Luke
tries to hold back a laugh but fails. “Kimber, aren’t you part of that club?”

I
don’t respond. The money my mother left for me has not played a big role in my
life. I don’t buy fancy things or take lavish vacations to faraway places. In
fact, after I sold my home I put most of the money in the bank and set aside
the rest for living expenses as Mr. Blake suggested I do. The two point six
million dollars my mother left me just does not feel like mine.

As
Luke helps me onto the oversized yacht the sound of my friends screaming, “SURPRISE!”
 
startles me so much so that my foot slips. Luke grabs me under my arms,
steadying me.

One
by one, I thank everyone for the wonderful gift.

“The
yacht may be sweet but it’s where we’re taking this bad boy that’s really
gonna  start the party.” Tommy says while holding Tiffany close. They are as
perfect together as any couple can be. The rebel, motorcycle stunt rider and
his rule bending, kind hearted fiancé.

“So
spill it. Where are we going? Who’s driving this thing?” I look around for some
sign of supervision.

“Caption
Gary is behind the wheel. As far as our destination, you’ll just have to wait
and see.” Luke explains.

Before
I can question anything Amber pulls me by the arm into a bedroom on board.
“Here’s your first outfit. Hope you like it!” She says before leaving me.

From
the bag, I pull a coral color bikini with fringe on top and a simple bottom
that ties on both sides of my hips. Coral, my favorite color. I knew Amber
wouldn’t disappoint. However, the ridiculous candle birthday hat that flies out
of the bag with the bathing suit is a different story. It will not be seeing
the light of day.

            Not wanting
to miss any of the fun, I quickly change and head back up.

            “How do I
look?”

“Like
you’re ready to party.” Amber replies.

She
takes my hand again and leads me up to the sun deck where everyone is. Luke’s
reaction is the only one I look for as I emerge. Sure Luke has seen me in a
bathing suit before but his expression is still one of awe.

“Nice
job.” He says to Amber who takes pride in her fashion sense by showing me off.

“You’re
welcome. She’s all yours now.” Amber lets me go as I make my way to Luke.

We
stay on the sun deck and the girls and I take turns standing on the bow,
repeating the famous line from Titanic but replace King for Queen of the world.
We dance and carry on until we finally reach international waters.

“Let’s
start the party!” Joel cries out.

His
red hair swooshes around his face from the ocean breeze. The sun threatens to
turn his pale freckled torso into one nasty sunburn. He pulls a bottle of vodka
from a cooler. The drinks start to flow and the day on the boat only continues
to get better and better.

Surrounded
by the open water and my dearest friends, making new memories, feels amazing.
It’s freeing to not be constricted by what confines us on land. The music is
loud and the view is breathtaking. Hours pass like minutes. We sunbathe on the
viewing deck before retreating into the lower cabin for a leisurely lunch.

Maybe
it’s the liquor or maybe it’s just the fact that I want some time alone with
Luke. I wait until everyone goes back up on deck to take him by the hand and
lead him away with me. The only spot I know we can be alone is the bedroom I
used earlier. I lead him there. I make sure the door is locked before I turn to
him and say, “I can’t thank you enough for giving me this day.”

 “Seein’
you happy is all I need.”

 Luke
wraps me in his arms while walking me backwards until my legs hit the bed. I
fall back onto it. I move my body up on the bed as Luke stands waiting. When
I’m finally in the middle, Luke crawls slowly on top of me. He kisses me with
love and passion. I can’t fight the strange erotic feeling that rushes through
me. I feel an urgency of sorts to be as close to Luke as I can. He takes full
notice of how close I am allowing him to be. How I am pressing him harder to
me.