Kickass Anthology (12 page)

“I will, Jay. I promise.”

“Good. Walk with me. We have a lot to talk about.”

“You mean the workouts?” Fin asked as he was levered onto his feet.

“Your fitness plan, yes.” They headed to the stairwell that would take them to the large track that occupied the upper level of the gym. They took the stairs at Fin’s pace – slow – and began to walk around the outermost ring of the track, out of the way of the faster joggers and runners. “I’ve been thinking about it, and I think I have a good starting plan outlined for you.”

“What does that mean?” Fin asked, trying to keep up with the quick pace.

“It’s a starting point, a good way to see what works and doesn’t work after a few weeks. Each person’s body is different, and we have to figure out what works for you.”

“Are we talking workouts or nutrition?”

“Both. I tell you what exercises to do and you do them. I tell you what foods to eat – and what foods not to eat – and you follow those directions too. Then we see how it affects you. Super simple.”

“Oh yeah. Easy peasy. Definitely.” Willing his eyes to stay focused straight ahead didn’t work. They still rolled.

“I thought this would be easy for you, Fin. I mean, since you like for someone else to be in charge.” Jay watched for his reaction out of the corner of his eye.

He nearly choked on his own spit. “What? Why would you think that?”

“You just seem to function better when you have someone else to tell you what to do. And you might have mentioned it a time or two while you were drunk,” Jay replied with a wink. “You like to be told what to do, and I can be plenty bossy. Match made in heaven.”

Fin fidgeted, feeling distinctly uncomfortable, and it had nothing to do with his workout.

“There’s no shame in that. It will just be in regard to your fitness plan for now. We’ll let the rest of our relationship play out organically, okay?”

“Yeah, okay.”

“Good. While you’re already uncomfortable, we might as well talk about nutrition.”

He let out an overdramatic groan. “This is the part where you tell me I can’t eat any of the things I like anymore, isn’t it?”

“If you like to eat junk, then yes.”

“Hi, my name is Finlay and I like to eat junk.”

Jay’s laughter and a hearty kiss on the lips brought a smile to his face, despite part of him wanting to stomp his foot in protest like a toddler. He sucked in a deep breath and reached for his new cooperative attitude as Jay, still laughing, said, “Your humor is one of your best qualities, I think.”

It took a moment for that to sink in.
That was one of the things he was trying to get me to understand yesterday.
“Thank you,” he said, trying to show that he took the compliment seriously. Then he took another deep breath. “Alright, go ahead. Lay it on me.”

Jay held up four fingers and ticked them off one by one. “Sweets, fried foods, fatty meats, and processed foods…”

“…are all things I’m forbidden to eat from now on,” Fin finished when he realized Jay was waiting for him to say it. “Fuck my life. That’s practically my entire diet.”

“You will feel so much better, Fin. I promise you will.” Jay placed a hand at the small of his back and rubbed his thumb in small circles. “Here are the good-for-you things we’re going to focus on: fruits and vegetables – the more colorful, the better – whole grains, nuts and seeds, dairy, and lean meats. That doesn’t sound so bad, does it?”

“It sounds wonderful. And expensive.”

“It can be, but we’ll plan ahead. Cooking at home and cutting out all the junk – and soda, Fin, no more soda – will save us money and hopefully keep you from being tempted to cheat.”

“I would never cheat on you!” Fin exclaimed, aghast, then grinned. “No matter how hung the tempting, seductive man might be.”

“Such a big, strong man, immune to the wiles of temptation.”

“Oh, I’ll feel it when a sweet or salty craving hits me and there isn’t a thing to satisfy it in the whole damn apartment.”

“Your body craves those things because that’s what you’ve been feeding it. Give it healthy fuel and you’ll start craving that instead.”

“I’ll just take your word for it for now.” He knew that Jay –
not just my best friend anymore, my lover!
– wouldn’t lie to him. He still had trouble believing he could ever crave healthy foods. “I want to help with the cooking and stuff. Just tell me what to make.”

“That would be fantastic,” Jay said, steering him back toward the stairs. “My last client is supposed to be here in a few minutes. When I get home tonight, we’ll sit down and map out a meal plan for the next few weeks. Then all you have to do is look at the meal plan to know what to make for any meal.”

“Snacks too, right?” Fin asked hopefully. “Because that’s where I’ll have the most trouble.”

“Yep, snacks too. I have a recipe for homemade energy bars that is delicious.” Fin made a face, and Jay laughed and ruffled his dirty blond hair. “It has chocolate in it.”

“You said the magic word.” Fin laughed. Then he paused with Jay at the stairwell door as someone called from across the track.

“Jay! Hey, Jay, wait up!”

“Hey, Mort, how’s it going?” Jay greeted the man warmly, shaking his hand.

Fin looked the man over with a critical eye. “Mort” appeared to be a few years older, maybe in his early thirties, and he was in incredible shape. He wore expensive brand name clothing, and his shoes had probably cost more than a month’s rent for Fin’s apartment. He instantly felt inferior. Mort and Jay were in the major leagues. Fin was so far below them, he had been cut from the minor leagues. Resisting the urge to cling to his boyfriend like a barnacle to stake his claim, he shifted to his other foot, wishing Mort would just go away.

“I’m good, but your next appointment got some nasty stomach virus so he won’t be here tonight. Said I could take his place with you, though, since my usual trainer is out of town.”

“He didn’t make arrangements with another trainer while he’s gone?” Jay asked in surprise.

“Death in the family. It was sudden, I think. He let me know he wouldn’t be here today, but he should be back next week. Would you mind?”

“Not at all. Just give me a few minutes.”

He put his arm around Fin’s waist and turned, but Mort didn’t catch the hint. He took a step toward Fin and stuck out his hand. “I’ve seen you around the gym, but we’ve never met. Mort Laramy.”

“Finlay Bizet,” he replied, wincing at the strength in the handshake.

“Bizet? Like the composer?”

“I suppose so, but there’s not a musical bone in my body.”

Jay joined the chuckling then remarked, “He’s a whiz with computers, though. Can make ‘em sing as well as any instrument.”

“Really? I’ve been having some trouble with my machine. The shop I used to take it to closed down a few months ago, and I haven’t found another reputable place yet. Maybe you could help me out? I’d be happy to compensate you for your time and trouble. I just don’t want to buy another computer.”

“You’d let a total stranger fiddle around with your computer?” Fin raised one eyebrow.
My inner skeptic is showing, isn’t it? The guy can’t be that much of an airhead.

“If Jay vouches for you, that’s good enough for me.”

“I vouch for him,” Jay said with a wink at Fin. “I’m still using the computer he built for me back in college. Runs like a dream.”

“Perfect. So would you mind?”

Mort looked so hopeful and Jay looked so triumphant, Fin was left shaking his head at both of them.
He would tell me that this is the power of positive thinking and positive self-talk at work. Who knows? Maybe it is. I definitely feel more confident today than yesterday.

“Sure, I would be happy to look at it for you.”

“Fantastic!” Mort’s expressive face lit up as he rattled off his address for Fin to store in his phone. It was in one of the priciest neighborhoods in the city.
Why am I not surprised?
“I’ll call my partner and let him know you’re coming. He knows all about what’s going on with the computer.”

“Sounds great,” he replied with a genuine smile.
He has a partner. Thank God!

“Go ahead downstairs, Mort. I’ll be with you in a few minutes.”

“Okay. Thanks again.” With a nod to each of them, Mort was on his way down the stairs.

After the door slammed behind him, Jay threw an arm across Fin’s shoulder and hugged him tight. “See? What did I tell ya?”

“Yeah, babe, I see.” His grin was contagious, and Fin couldn’t help but grin along with him.

“Make positive life changes and everything else falls into place.”

“Couldn’t just be a coincidence?”

“No such thing. Besides, you wouldn’t have even been up on this track if you hadn’t started making those positive changes.”

“True. One question, though. How am I going to get to his house?” he asked, wrapping his arm around Jay’s waist. “Neither of us have a car. I don’t have any money for a cab.”

“I have cash in my wallet in my gym bag. Stop it, we made an agreement.” Jay covered his mouth, shutting down the protest forming on his lips. “Get whatever you need to catch a cab and pick up dinner on your way home.”

“After the nutrition talk we just had, you want me to grab takeout?”

“No, no. There’s a grill and bar a couple blocks from my building that has a delicious grilled chicken and kale salad. Get two.” Then he quickly added, “With vinaigrette, not ranch dressing.”

“You have to take all the fun out of eating, don’t you?” Fin sighed as Jay planted a wet kiss on the side of his face and walked away laughing.

SIX WEEKS later, Fin felt better than he could remember feeling since his college days. Jay wouldn’t let him check his weight because he said they were focusing on fitness rather than some elusive ideal weight; he had gone so far as to give away his bathroom scales after he caught Fin trying to sneak in a weight check. So Fin had no idea how he was progressing weight-wise, but he felt good. He was on a strict diet, which gave his body the energy it needed to keep up with the workouts, and he was sleeping well, thanks to Jay and his “assistance.” There was still a long way to go on his journey of self-improvement, but he was getting healthy, and he was already seeing results. Just as Jay predicted, his self-confidence skyrocketed. Even though it was hard work to better oneself, he pushed through and continued to meet every goal Jay set for him. Jay was beside him every step of the way, just as he’d promised, and refused to listen to his whining or threats to quit. Because of Jay, and his own stubbornness, Fin had survived six weeks into his journey without fucking anything up.

His self-talk had become more positive as well. He was learning to build himself up instead of tearing himself down as Jay helped him replace negative internal words and phrases with positive ones. That one was hard. Years of negative self-talk were deeply ingrained in his psyche, but Fin wasn’t giving up on that either. He was determined to finally succeed at something.

Though he’d had no luck in the job-hunting department, he seemed to have started a small computer repair and tech support service without ever intending to do so. Mort Laramy and his partner were delighted that he had not only saved their computer but also made it run more quickly and efficiently. The word-of-mouth advertising they spread around their social circles had supplied him with enough repair work and troubleshooting to be able to contribute a little toward the household bills. He was once again a productive member of society.

His health had changed, his attitude had changed, and his perspective had changed, all for the better. And the people in his life noticed. Even his mother spoke to him differently, with more respect than she had ever afforded him before. Jay noticed everything, and his affectionate smugness drove Fin all kinds of crazy. Every time he tried to do something about it, they ended up doing other, more important things – the kind of things that had Fin sleeping like a baby at night and eagerly offering to do them again first thing in the morning. Jay’s schedule varied according to his clients, but they were able to eat most of their meals together, go to bed together at night, and wake up together every morning.

Life is good,
Fin thought for the first time ever as he and Jay were wrapping up their three-mile run. The last mile had been tough. Jay had been with him, pushing him to meet the goal, and he did it. They rounded the corner of the gym and jogged toward the door, wherein a steam in the sauna, a shower, and a muscle rub awaited them, when a bright pink sheet of paper on the noticeboard caught Fin’s eye.

He paused in front of the noticeboard, reading with growing interest while trying to control his breathing. Jay made it to the gym door before realizing Fin wasn’t with him, then he jogged back to stand beside him and stare at the plethora of colors and announcements behind the glass.

Not seeing anything that he thought would have caught Fin’s attention, he asked, “So…whatcha looking at?”

He wasn’t even breathing hard.
Damn rat bastard. Mr. I-Can-Run-Five-Miles-Easy-So-Three-Is-A-Freaking-Cakewalk. I love him but, shit, he could at least pretend to be out of breath.
Fin pushed the unhelpful thought aside and stabbed a finger at the bright pink flyer. “That one.”