In Blood and Worth Loving 3 Kiss Cover (4 page)

“
Things had better change and change quickly, Desiree because my patience with you won
’
t last much longer.
”

“
You have a hell of a nerve after what your fem said to me.
”

“
She
’
s not my fem and after that stunt she pulled earlier, she never will be. And just so you know, that had no bearing on what shit I
’
ll take from you.
”

“
What?
”

“
If you keep trying to behave like an easy lay, you
’
re going to get whatever fool who falls for you killed.
”

He slept around as much as he liked but she was easy because she was lonely? And any man attracted to her was a fool? Although his words sent a chill through her, she lifted her chin defiantly.
“
I don
’
t need or require your permission to allow any man I want to pick me up.
”

She glared at him. For two cents, she
’
d rev her engine and knock him on his ass.

“
You
’
d better realize that I am not playing games with you and don
’
t even think about hitting me with your vehicle. That would seriously piss me the fuck off and believe me you don
’
t really want to do that.
”

“
I
’
ll do just what you do, Conner
–
whatever the hell I like
. And I
’
ll do it
regardless of how much you might disapprove of it or how much it might hurt you.
”

“
Is that what you think?
”
He stepped so close she could almost feel his breath on her face.
“
That I intentionally do things to hurt you?
”
He cupped his palm against her cheek through the lowered driver
’
s side window and softened his voice.
“
Really, Desiree?
”

“
Given your behavior and the fact that I always end up hurt, what other conclusion can I reach, Conner?
”

He bent his head to brush his cool lips against her neck.
“
You can
’
t think that. Not after all the time we
’
ve spent together.
”

“
No matter how much you deny it, you always go out fucking, leaving me alone and hurt. So yes, Conner, I really do believe it.
”

She felt his jaw clench.
“
Why the hell can
’
t you understand that everything I do, I do to protect you?
”

“
It
’
s not protection I want or need from you. When you leave me alone to go out fucking other women, it doesn
’
t protect me. It hurts me. And you know that and yet you do it all the time. In fact, you
’
re going to do it tonight. Aren
’
t
you
?
”

He jerked away from her.
“
I
’
m done trying to reason with or please you. You
’
ve been warned. Do whatever the hell you think you can get away with, but you
’
d better be prepared to suffer the consequences when I catch you and I will catch you!
”

“
That sounds like a threat, Conner.
”

“
That
’
s because it is!
”
He turned and stalked away.

She watched him until he got into his car and drove away in a reckless fashion. His attempt to make her bow to his will infuriated her and made her more determined to defy him. But with his cum trickling out of her, returning to the bar or even going to another one wasn
’
t a viable option. He seemed to have radar on her and
nearly
always manage to show up in time to ensure she never got intimate with anyone else. Her only option for the night was to go home.

She sat shivering in the driver
’
s seat. He was angry without cause but he couldn
’
t possibly expect her to sit around waiting for him to come see her
after he
’
d had his fill of fucking his fem of the day. Fems. What could he possibly see in such nasty, mean-spirited creatures?

After taking several slow deep breaths, she started the engine and drove out of the parking lot.

An hour later, she lay soaking in her bath, trying to decide how to get herself out of the mess she was in
while trying to pretend she hadn
’
t fully enjoyed being sexed up in a public parking lot in front of an audience.

She was as attracted to Connor as she
’
d been the night they met, close to a year earlier. During that time, the charming vamp she
’
d fallen for had nearly disappeared to be replaced by a short-tempered male who seemed to think he owned her and was determined to ensure she remained celibate and lonely.

Yes, he occasionally made her orgasm as he had that morning and night. But it was still clear that he was not going to allow her a chance to find happiness again
unless she managed to attract a man willing and able to stand up to him. The chances of a human male being equal to the task were practically none existent. She was screwed.

Feeling weary and hopeless, she climbed out of the bath. She dried off, pulled a nightgown on, and slipped into bed. She lay restless and sad for a long time before she finally fell asleep.

The next morning she woke to find a dozen red roses in a vase on each night stand. The accompanying card read:
Forgive me, CR.

Annoyed that he had again entered her apartment while she slept, she rose and tossed both the vases and the roses in the trash. She
’
d forgive him as soon as hell froze over. She got her phone and texted him:
LEAVE ME ALONE!

His immediate one word response stunned her:
DONE!

“
Do you want to talk about him?
”

Desiree put down her fork and looked across the café table at the full-figured pretty woman who sat opposite her. She wasn
’
t sure how she felt about Conner
’
s adopted niece, Rayna. The other woman
’
s matchmaking efforts had ended with Conner
’
s brothers Adrian and
Jayvyn happily married to human women. Unfortunately, she had not played matchmaker with Conner and Desi. Clearly, Rayna had not felt they belonged together. After six weeks of silence, she decided that Conner apparently agreed with his niece.

The mixed emotions Desiree felt were b
etter
discussed with her best friend. However, Cayenne and Jayvyn were vacationing in Hawaii, so when Rayna invited her to lunch she
’
d accepted.

“
I
’
m not sure there
’
s anything to talk about. I asked him to leave me alone and he finally has.
”

“
And you
’
re okay with that?
”

She shrugged.
“
Why wouldn
’
t I be? I got what I wanted.
”

“
Did you?
”

Rayna
’
s habit of asking probing questions was starting to annoy her. She picked up her fork and looked down at the grilled chicken salad she no longer had a taste for.
“
So how is he?
”

“
I wish I knew for sure.
”

Desiree looked up from her plate.
“
What do you mean you wish you knew for sure?
”

Rayna sighed.
“
I haven
’
t seen him for over a month.
”

She laid her fork down and leaned forward.
“
Is he all right? Has Adrian seen him?
”

“
They
’
ve talked, but Uncle Adrian hasn
’
t seen him either. He
’
s avoiding us both. As you can imagine, we
’
re a little worried.
”

Desiree swallowed slowly and reminded herself that Conner was a full
–
blood vampire fully capable of taking care of himself.
“
Is he all right?
”
she asked again.

“
That
’
s a difficult question to answer since I haven
’
t seen him, but if I had to hazard a guess I
’
d say no.
”

“
What do you mean? Surely he
’
s not in any danger.
”

“
He
’
s capable of handling
nearly
any physical danger he might face, but you must know he
’
s not any happier than you are.
”

There was no point in denying that she was unhappy.
“
Actually, I don
’
t know that. Now that he
’
s not dogging me and doing his level best to make sure I stay miserable and lonely, he has more time to fuck around.
”

“
I won
’
t pretend that I don
’
t know things have been very difficult for you, Desi.
”

“
But?
”

“
But surely you know he cares for you.
”

“
I know he said he did, but his assertion flew in the face of his endless and concerted efforts to make sure I couldn
’
t form a meaningful relationship with another man.
”

“
Why would he do that if he didn
’
t care about you?
”

“
All I know is that he
’
s perfectly happy for me to be lonely while he fucks around.
”
Deciding she probably sounded like the unattractive shrew he
’
d implied she was becoming, she sighed.
”
Is this my fault?
”

Rayna frowned.
“
Is what your fault?
”

“
That he and I are not even on speaking terms anymore.
”

“
Why would that be your fault? You have as much right to enjoy intimacy as he does.
”

“
I know that, but I accepted a lot of expensive gifts from him.
”
Her thoughts turned to the most treasured of the presents he
’
d given her
;
a beautiful mare. She sighed.
“
I don
’
t know what to do about Hope.
”

Rayna looked surprised.
“
We have been taking good care of her, but she
’
s your girl and she misses you
as you must miss her.
”

She briefly allowed her thoughts to linger on the joy of riding Hope along a quiet moonlit trail with Conner and his stallion Partner at her side.
“
Of course I miss her.
”
And
Conner and Partner
.

“
Then come ride her. If you
’
re worried about running into Uncle Conner, don
’
t. He hasn
’
t been home much since your split so we
’
re taking care of Partner too. The alarm code hasn
’
t changed, Desi
. Y
ou
’
re still very welcome in our home. Come ride her so she knows you haven
’
t deserted her.
”

She nodded.
“
Thanks. I will. Do you think my having accepted her is part of the reason for my
problems with Conner?
”

“
What do you mean?
”

“
Generally when a woman allows a human male to shower her with gifts, he starts to think he owns her.
”

“
Uncle Conner
’
s not a human male as you know and his sense of possession has nothing to do with having given you gifts. He has a lot of money and he enjoys sharing some of it with you. The behavior that you found a turnoff is part of our culture. You must know he
’
s interested in you.
”

“
Only as a friend.
”

Rayna arched a brow.
“
You can
’
t really think he
’
s so possessive with any other woman. Human or fem.
”

“
Are you implying I
’
m in some way special to him?
”

“
I
’
m not implying it. I
’
m coming right out and saying it. He
’
s only behaving the way he
i
s because of how he feels about you. Surely you know how special you are to him.
”

Desiree took a slow deep breath.
“
Are you implying that I
’
m his…
?”
She allowed her voice to trail off.

“
Blood?
”
Rayna finished.

Where a human male might tell his woman she was the love of his life, Conner and his brothers would call such a woman their blood. Unfortunately he had given her no reason to suppose he harbored anything even remotely approaching that level of caring for her. She shook her head.
“
No. I know I
’
m not his perfect mate and never will be.
”

“
Why are you so sure of that?
”

“
Oh I don
’
t know. Maybe because he told me the night we met that he no longer dated human women. Or maybe the fact that he
’
s resisted all my efforts to get close to him might make me sure. Hell, it might even be because the last time we saw each other he practically called me an unattractive shrew
. After
ruining my prospects for that night.
“

Rayna compressed her lips. Then, without warning, she laughed.

After a moment of startled annoyance, Desiree laughed too. It was either that or cry.

Rayna sobered and reached across the table to touch her hand.
“
I
’
m sorry. For some reason that remark struck my funny bone.
”

“
Apparently Conner feels the same way.
”

Rayna shook her head and squeezed her hand.
“
I know you
’
re not in a happy place at the moment, but neither is he. Please don
’
t make the mistake of thinking that his feelings aren
’
t deep just because he hasn
’
t surrendered to them yet.
”

“
Yet?
”
Desiree shook her head.
“
He
’
s as emotionally distant and emotionally impossible to get next to as he was the night we met. What are the chances I
’
ll live long enough for that to change?
”

Rayna compressed her lips and looked away.

“
Don
’
t hurt yourself trying not to laugh on my account,
”
she advised.

Rayna
’
s lips twitched, but she managed to suppress her laughter.
“
Don
’
t lose hope.
”

“
He
’
s unwilling to give me w
h
at I want and need. Realistically, if I
’
d had half a brain, I would have moved on months ago. Hell, I should never have fallen for him in the first place. No matter how much I want to be, I know I
’
m not his blood and I never will be.
”

Rayna rubbed her forehead.
“
Kristopher and I are hanging out tonight. We
’
d love to have you come with.
”

Kristopher Macarik was Jayvyn
’
s best friend. He and Desiree had developed a friendship independent of their individual best friends, but she wasn
’
t in the mood to put on a happy face.
“
Thanks, but I
think I
’
ll pas
s
.
”

“
Well, if you change your mind or just want to talk, call me and we can kick Kristopher
’
s hunky ass to the curb and hang out girl style or, if you prefer, I
’
m sure Kristopher would be happy to kick my ass to the curb and hang out with you.
”

Hang out with Kristopher when she longed to see Conner? Conner. Damn him. He must have known she was upset when she sent that angry text. Why hadn
’
t he considered that when deciding how to respond? Why hadn
’
t he made an attempt to get her to change her mind? More importantly, what could she do to school his big ass without looking as if she were fickle? She studied Rayna for several moments before responding.
“
Thanks, but I
’
m going to go out on my own and see what kind of excitement I can stir up.
”

Rayna
’
s dark lashes swept down.
“
Do you think that
’
s a good idea?
”

“
You wouldn
’
t ask that if you knew how long it
’
s been since I
’
ve been with a man.
”

Rayna frowned.
“
When it comes to being lonely and manless, believe me I feel your pain on a very visceral level.
”

“
You? You
’
re beautiful and confident. How much man troubles can you have?
”

“
Are you serious, Desi? I was raised by and live with three full-bloods who are convinced no man or full-blood is good enough for me. I
’
m all too familiar with the tactic of having any man
on whom
I show interest intim
id
ated.

“
I
’
m
not trying to minimize what Uncle Conner did to your prospects, but at least you only have him doing it. I had and have all three of them doing it to me. I can
’
t remember the last time I had a real date with a man I could even hope to be intimate with. The only human males they
trust me
with are Macarik and one or two of their friends who they know have no romantic interest in me.
”