Imprint (14 page)

And Sean realised too.
Da
d was different from Father
.
Father only implied a blood relation, while Dad was a term of endearment. Subtle differences, but in this case those differences were like chasms.

By the time they arrived home, it was late. Late and dark. They’d gone to the Astrology exhibit, because Drew had promised, and Sean didn’t find it so bad. He could see why Hayden found the stars so fascinating: they really were enchanting when you took the time to think about them. They were mystical objects, so far out of reach, so alien to the monotony of this life. He’d hoped that there would be some sort of psychology exhibit as well, something paranormal, anything that would help him. He was disappointed though because by the end of the evening the problem of getting his body back was still as looming and menacing as ever.

“We’re home pretty late, so actually get some sleep tonight Sean,” Hayden advised while they sat in the car, in the driveway, in the dark
. “I didn’t want to say so
earlier, but you look like shit.”

“You
always
look like shit,” Drew countered. “And it’s
kinda
hypocritical, telling me to sleep.”

Hayden shrugged. “I’m not the one who a
lmost died three weeks ago
.”

“So?”

“You’re being stubborn again,” the elder sighed. “And I…I guess I’m worried, okay?” He paused for a moment, as if hesitant about continuing. “You know, there’s something
different about you.” Sean noticed
Drew’s shoulders tense.

“What’s different?” he asked, obviously feigning nonchalance.

“I’m not sure, but you seem…happier than before.”
Everyone seemed to be saying that lately, Sean grouched to himself. Had he really been
that
miserable?

“Isn’t that a good thing?”
Drew asked.

“Yeah,” Hayden sighed,
but
his voice was wary. “It’s just
surprising, that’s all.”

“Oh.”

“You’d tell me if something was wrong, right?”

Drew let out a derisive laugh. “Please don’t start with all of that ‘you can always talk to me, I’
ll always be there for you’ crap
. You know I hate it.
”

“I won’t,” Hayden muttered. “It makes me uncomfortable as well.
What you said before, about the dreams…
I just
need to know that if something
was
wrong, you’d tell me. I need to know that you trust me.” Sean wasn’t sure whether to be touched or surprised; this was probably the most emotional he’d ever seen his brother.

Drew was quiet for a while. “Okay,” he said at last. “
I trust you with my life, so don’t worry about me.
Is that good enough?”

“Yeah,”
Hayden smiled in relief
. “That’s just
fine.” Sean wanted to laugh. H
e was so tempted to burst out into hysterical, maniacal laughter, because it was all so ironic. Hayden didn’
t understand
the truth behind those words, the inside joke. He did though, he understood perfectl
y. How could you trust someone
with your life when you were
already
dead?

“You’re sick,” Sean said, later on, when he was alone with Drew
again
in his room. “Saying something like that, just to spite me.”

“I didn’t say it to spite you,” Drew shrugged. “I just have a sense of humour.”

“
You are
twisted
.”

“So are most people, aren’t they? You can hardly blame me. Dying is pretty traumatic.”

Sean sighed in defeat.
“Why did you ask a
bout my father today
?”

“I was trying to do you a favour,” Drew admitted. “I f
igure it must be pretty hard,
not even being able to remember the man.”

“I never thought you were capable of being so sensitive,”
Sean mocked
, although
he was
inwardly surprised.

“Yeah, well, I have my moments.”

“Why do you even care?”

“I never wanted to purposely hurt you by doing this, you know. I just thought I’d try and make it a bit easier.”

“That
still doesn’t m
ake you any less of a prick,” Sean deadpanned.

A smile tugged at the edges of Drew’s lips. “Thank god,” he said. “I thought you were going to thank me then.”

“Never going to happen,” Sean assured him. “Not in my lifetime, anyway.”

“Don’t you mean death-time?”

“You really need to stop with the death puns.”

Drew just laughed, and it didn’t sound hollow. It sounded real. “Whatever, jerk, I’m going to go shower,” he said.

As the door shut and the water start
ed, Sean smiled to himself
. It was stupid, really, he had nothing to smile about. Except that today had been good because he’d learnt something, no matter how insignificant, that made him feel less empty: he’d had a father once who liked the sea.

At that
moment, Sean’s head felt like one, large beehive. There really wasn’t many better ways of desc
ribing the sensation. It wasn’t
unpleasant, just confusing. A hundred, imaginary bees buzzed in his ears and fluttered around in the limited space. So many questions, problems, thou
ghts, emotions. He would need his own mental library – and a mental secretary as well – to file them all away into categories.

“Hey, are you feeling okay?” Drew returned to the room with breakfast, a bowl of a sloppy oatmeal substance, and yet another text book.
“You know, you look like the living dead.” He laughed at his own joke, obviously the death puns wouldn’t get old anytime soon.

It was the next day, and Sean felt like he had a hypothetical hangover.
He’d had a whole night to mull it over, get himse
lf worked up, and now the fears and questions
were making him crazy. He
let out an unhappy sigh. “How can you be so
relaxed
about everything? And don’t eat that mush around me, please. I’m feeling queasy.”

“Stop being prissy,” Drew rolled his eyes. “You can’t
feel
sick. So suck it up, your whining is
giving me a migraine.”

“Good.”

“Whatever.
” Drew flipped open the text book and started reading casually while slurping up the grey oatmeal pulp. “If you’re so restless, why don’t you go outside? Just leave me alone, please.”

“Don’t you think
I
have more important things to worry
about right now?” Sean
glared
, pacing ince
ssantly across the room. “Anyway,
you go back to my school in three days.
I’m surprised you’re not more worried.
”

“Why should I be
?
They’re not going to figure anything out. They’re all too stupid, the pricks who go there.”

“You’re really a bastard, you know, thinking you’re so superior to everyone.”

“I never said
I
was better than
them, just that they happen to be stupid. Which is true.
” Drew paus
ed thoughtfully, continuing: “al
though, your brother is a bit different. He could be a problem.”

“He already knows there’s something
up,” Sean said. “How could he not, after yesterday?
I bet it’s only a matter of time until he finds out.”

“Do you
really
want him to find out
?” Drew had long since given up on his casual act and was now watching Sean with a serious expression, eyes strangely
empathetic. “You know if he finds out, he’ll tell people. He won’t keep it to himself. He might try and help you, but he wouldn’t know how.” Drew suddenly laughed. “I wonder if he would try to have me exorcised.”

“Would it work
?”

“No, but it would sure be hilarious.
I now
expel thee spirit from thy body
and all that crap
.
”
He did a vague impression of a priest, complete with crude hand gestures. But he quickly
sobered
,
that ominous expression returning. “S
eriously, though, n
o one can find out about this
.
Not Hayden, not
Ali.
”

“You’re just trying to trick me. If Hayden finds out, he’ll find a way to help me
on his own,” Sean denied weakly, but he didn’t believe his own words.

“His ambition is to prove
that supernatural occurrences like
us
actually exist. Do you really think he would pass up a once in a lifetime chance, just because you’re his brother?”

“You don’t know him –”

“Don’t be so naïve!” Drew’s sneer was suddenly mocking, and it startled Sean to see the hostility. “People are selfish. They do what they want and don’t think about how it affects others until later. Your brother’s no different, and you’d be a fool to think he is.”

“
You’re lying.”

“No, you just don’t want to accept the truth.”

“I trust them, Hayden and Ali, they would-”

“Help you. Of course they would,” Drew sneered. “Of course they would risk themselves to help the person who’
s taken them
for
granted
the
se
past few years.”

Sean knew there was truth in those words
, secretly he’d always known. He’d
done many selfish things in the past,
used p
eople for his own ends
(in particular Ali)
,
but Drew’s words still ma
de him angry. He felt the anger
seeping through him like a drug and
suddenly, before he was aware he had done it, he was lunging at the boy in the chair and there was a dull roaring in his ears. For a fraction of a moment, he felt something connect with his fist. He was so surprised that his anger diminished in an instant and he stumbled back, reeling, with wide eyes.

He could see the shock on Drew’s face and knew it was mirrored on his own. It wasn’t possibl
e. He was nothing more than an I
mprint, he couldn’t physically
feel.
Drew hesitantly lifted up a hand and touched his cheek, as if trying to check if he himself still existed or not. “How…?” the sentence trailed off into an unanswered question.
How did you manage to touch me?

“I-I
do
n’t understand,” Sean stuttered, staring down at his hands in morbid fascination.
“I don’t have a body. I can’t feel t
hings. I should have just passed
straight through you.”

“You didn’t,” Drew hissed. “I felt your fingers touch me, I know it.”

Sean thought for a moment, before suddenly a thought came to him. “I remember now,” he said. “When I first woke up, I leant on the hospital bed to pull myself up. I didn’t pass through it, so maybe something like that happened just now.”

“It’s possible,”
Drew’s expression faded
from
shock to apprehension.
“You
’re not exactly a conventional I
mprint. Technically you’re not dead, so I suppos
e your soul still has ties to
its body.”
He sighed wearily
. “This has never happened before, so I have no idea what else you may be able to do.
I have a few theories, though.”

“But why
…?”

“Don’t question why
,” the other snapped. “The
re are some things
we just can’t e
xplain. Listen to me, if you want to stay in this world for as long as possible you shouldn’t do that again. Making yourself solid
must take up energy, and if you run out…”

“Shouldn’t you be happy that I’ll be gone sooner?” Sean interrupted
bitterly
.

Drew paused for a moment, and a smirk tilted his lips. “Nah, you’re good entertainment.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“Just don’t do it though, okay?”

Sean raised
an eyebrow. “You can’t
exactly stop me. I can tell Hayden
now, I’ll expose you and end this-”

“You’re more of an idiot than I thought
if you think I’ll let you do that
,” Drew snorted, and there was a strangely sinister glint in his
eyes. “
You remember that I hold the cards here, right?
If you try and tell them, I
will
know about it and I’ll be forced to…silence them
somehow
. The existence of Imprints
is a secret. No one living can
know about them; it would disrupt the balance of the world.”