Immortal Light: Wide Awake (13 page)

Lucy squirmed a little. “Well, I
sort of told Mark I’d go watch him at the game. He’s going to bring
me his big purple and gold Pirates blanket so I can pretend we’re
cuddling while I watch. Maybe we could go for super cute instead of
tempting.” She smiled apologetically.

Surprisingly, Kat’s face lit up at the sound
of Lucy’s idea. “Oh, that is perfect.”

She stopped, and Lucy could tell that her
brain was hatching a plan ‘B’ that would incorporate a complete
overhaul and most likely a total abandonment of plan
‘A’.

“
Ok, here’s what
we’ll do: sexy goddess is out, but I can for sure do cute. I’m
thinking pony tails with purple and gold ribbons
…
”
Her brain took
over and actually quieted her mouth.
“
Oh yeah, this will be great. Not as
great as goddess, but cute enough.”

The first period bell sounded off in the
distance.

“
Ok, we’ll talk at lunch.” Kat ran
back toward Dave and blew Lucy a kiss. “We may have to skip eighth
period just to have enough time; I think we need to go shopping
first!” Her shout faded into the cacophony of the bustling high
school, and Lucy was once again left with her handsome
prince.

Mark dropped Lucy off at her
English class, kissed her gently on the lips, and let her go. His
smile lifted her so much that she felt as if nothing could shake
her contentment. Walking into class she compulsively looked to the
rows behind her usual seat. Again, there was no sign of
Benjamin.

Good
, she thought.
You can just stay
gone forever
.

***

When the bell sounded after lunch, the two
couples walked hand in hand out into the sunlight of a
seventy-three-degree day. A light wind swept over the campus and
Lucy danced out into the sun light with her arms wide.

“
What a beautiful day!” she
exclaimed.

“
So, you two are skipping the rest
of the day?” Mark asked.

Lucy looked back at Kat. “What? We’re
skipping?” she asked. “The last I heard, we were skipping eighth
period because it’s just study hall.”

Kat shot a pleading smile in her
direction. “Please, Luce. We need more than a couple hours.
Besides, all of our classes are just reviewing from last year and
you know we both had last year finished before last year even
finished.”

Lucy rolled her eyes and nodded. “I guess,”
she replied.

Kat looked at Mark. “Don’t worry, I’ll have
her back before the game. She’ll see every pass and run and all
that.” Her enthusiasm was so tangible that no one could really ever
say no to her.

In the parking lot, Lucy spotted her car in
its usual place near the back fence. It sat facing the cemetery,
the schools’ closest neighbor, which provided a pleasant view of
the city and large full trees where Lucy had stolen away for lunch
in past years.

“
Aren’t you so excited for this
dance?” Kat said as the two girls made their way to the
car.

“
You have no idea how long it
seems I’ve waited for this. He is so great.”

“
And you two make such a cute
couple. I’ve always thought that, by the way.” Kat nodded
reassuringly when Lucy looked at her incredulously.

“
I’m just happy, Kat. This is such
a great feeling.”

Lucy brushed her hair back from her face and
looked up at her car. For a moment she slowed her pace then
suddenly made a beeline for the driver’s door. She unlocked it
swiftly and threw herself into the seat.

Kat, a bit confused, made her way to the
passenger door. Lucy sat and took a few deep breaths before hearing
Kat’s gentle rap on the glass. Lucy leaned over and unlocked the
door.

“
Sorry,” Lucy said, trying not to
sound preoccupied.

“
What was that all
about?”

“
Nothing. Let’s get out of here.”
Lucy’s demeanor had suddenly flipped.

“
Ooooh,” Kat said under her
breath.

“
Oh, what?” Lucy reacted in a
sharp tone.

“
That’s Benjamin’s bike isn’t it?”
Kat pointed out Lucy’s window.

“
Yes, but it doesn’t matter. He’s
made his choice and I’ve made mine. I’m happy now.”

Lucy paused as she started her car. She looked
out the window at the motorcycle.

“
But you know what I really want
to do? I want to go up to him and tell him how I feel. I know I had
no claim on him, I know all we had were a couple chance meetings
and then I started having these really weird dreams where he kills
me, but he could have at least not latched onto the biggest bimbo
in the school on the first day!”

Lucy was getting down to the facts of the
matter and it felt like a long overdue cleansing.

“
I want to tell him that he really
hurt my feelings; that he needs to take a look around and get some
social skills before going into public. He needs get a clue that a
girl might like him and at least give her a chance.”

“
You have Mark now, Luce. Let it
go. To Hell with Benjamin. He lost. You won. That’s all there is to
it.”

“
I know, but you
can’t just go around being that clueless. I mean, my mom bought him
lunch, he was all sweet to me and then he’s a total jerk. You don’t
do that. I feel like he needs to be punished. I just
…
”
Lucy looked
out her window again at the motorcycle.
“
That
’
s what I should
do.
”

“
What should you do?” Kat asked
apprehensively.

“
I should really just go out there
and … yeah, I think I will.”

“
Will what, Lucy? What are you
going to do?” Kat’s voice radiated a little bit of
alarm.

Lucy grabbed her door handle and got out of
the car.

“
Lucy, what are you doing?” Kat
said even more frantically.

Lucy squared herself with the shiny black
motorcycle.

“
Lucy, don’t do anything you’re
going to regret. I’m serious!”

Lucy slammed the car door to muffle Kat’s
pleadings.

With a sense of justice building up inside of
her, she placed her hands on the polished fuel tank of the
motorcycle and whispered to it as though she were holding someone
buy the throat.

“
This is what you get for being
such a jerk.”

With one hard push, she leaned
into the bike and, more easily than she could have imagined, threw
it to the ground with a loud, heavy thud. It rocked on its uneven
parts and Lucy stood over it with a pleased look in her eyes. Kat
stared in absolute horror and amazement through the window
glass.

Lucy opened the door and got
back in. “Now
that’s
a catharsis,” she said as Kat just sat
wide-eyed.

***

A silent drive led the girls to
Baskin-Robins on Newmark, where Lucy got out of the car, seemingly
carefree. Being just after noon, there was no one but the woman
behind the counter in the store. Lucy walked up to the glass case
and ordered a single scoop of her favorite flavor, Chocolate Chip
Mint. Kat ordered the same. They waited in silence for their cones
and Kat waited for Lucy to speak first.

Their ice cream was served to them, Lucy paid
for both, and the two sat down at a small table near the front
window. Lucy took one bite and sighed deeply. She savored the
mouthful and swallowed it with her eyes closed, a look of total
relief on her face.

“
Oh, man, that felt so good,” Lucy
said.

Kat wasn’t sure if Lucy was referring to the
ice cream or the bike tipping incident, so she just hummed in
agreement with her mouth full.

Lucy took another bite. “I mean, was I wrong?
He deserved it, didn’t he?”

The conversation was indeed about Benjamin and
not about ice cream.

“
Well, it definitely made a
statement that you hate his guts,” Kat replied.

“
But that’s just the thing, I
don’t think I do.”

Kat looked at her, desperate for
understanding. “Wait, I thought you were mad at him for ignoring
you and killing you in a dream.”

“
I was; I am,
but there’s something about him that is so weird. It’s like
…
”
She looked out
the window for an explanation, but found none. “I don’t know what
it’s like, but like I said before, I feel like I’ve known him
forever. I’m just really mad at him.”

With a flabbergasted sigh, Kat decided to go
for broke and call it like it was. “Lucy, you are losing your mind.
I mean, seriously, what is going on with you?”

“
I wish I knew.”

“
Why are we talking about
Benjamin? Do you even like Mark?”

Lucy jerked her head up. “What are you talking
about; I love him. He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to
me.”

“
Yeah, but do you like
him?”

“
I don’t understand what you
mean.”

“
Guys look at us differently than
we look at them. When you go after a guy, you’re looking for strong
and handsome. You want him to have those big, strong arms and look
good with his shirt off, right?”

Lucy thought for a moment. “Well, yeah, but
that’s not all.”

“
I know, let me finish. When a guy
looks for a girl, he looks for the same kind of stuff. They want
delicate, sexy, maybe funny, but it’s all mostly looks.”

“
So how is that any different than
us?”

“
Because, Lucy, when a girl looks
for a guy, she also wants supportive, protective, and confident.
The perfect guy has all of those qualities. We both know that
strong and handsome isn’t good enough, and we both know that Mark
is both strong and handsome. So when I ask if you like him, I mean
is he all the things you want in a guy?”

Lucy thought about it as she took another bite
of her ice cream. “Well, he’s definitely confident.” She thought
some more. “Yes, he’s all those things that I want. He supports me,
I guess, but that really hasn’t come up yet, and he’s completely
protective without being overbearing. He always walks me to my
car.”

“
Okay. So why get upset over
Benjamin or even think about him when you have exactly what you
want?”

“
I don’t know. I guess I just let
him get to me. This has been a really weird first week of school
and I just want it to be over so I can move on. I really did think
there was something there for a while, but I guess it wasn’t
mutual.” Lucy focused on her ice cream for a moment. “But it’s over
now. I’m over him and I’m moving on. If I never think about him
again, it will be too soon.”

Kat looked a little skeptical, but seemed
relieved overall, and her genial smile returned. “Okay, then. Where
should we start today?”

There seemed to be an understanding between
the girls that the subject of Benjamin Raven was over and life was
to move on.

“
Let’s start at the shopping
center and then go from there. They have these cute tanks in purple
and gold,” Lucy said.

“
Okay, cool. Then we’ll hit up the
craft store and get some really cute ribbon and maybe some Marti
Gras beads or something.”

“
Sounds like a plan.”

Chapter
7

Fans and students poured out of the stands
after the first game of the season. It was a victory for the
Pirates, but Lucy didn’t care for football. She sat patiently in
the stands with Kat, a giant purple and gold blanket wrapped around
them.

“
How long does it usually take for
them to come out?” Lucy asked as she shivered just a little bit in
the brisk coastal air.

“
Not too long. Guys shower and
dress faster than any creatures alive. It’s pretty amazing. You
know, you can actually tell how much a football player likes you by
how long it takes for him to come out of the locker
room.”

“
Shut up, that’s totally not
true.”

“
You’ll see. C’mon, let’s go see
who wins.”

Kat stood and reached her hand out to Lucy.
Together the two girls made their way toward the locker
room.

“
There’s the door. I don’t see
anyone yet.” Kat pretended to look at a watch that wasn’t there.
“Hmmm, it’s not looking good.”

“
Stop it, you’re
such a dork,” Lucy said, craning her neck around students milling
outside waiting for the dance to start. Looking from side to side
she saw other girlfriends, girls she knew, texting and talking,
waiting for their football players.
He
better be first
, she
thought.

“
I see movement,” Kat said, and
the entire company of girls turned at once to see who was
first.

To Lucy’s elation and relief, Mark came
bursting through the door.