Immortal Light: Wide Awake (12 page)

“
Wow, I didn’t know gentlemen
still existed. I thought chivalry was dead.” she said, smiling
longingly up at Mark.

“
I figured I’d be the first to
bring it back. That way I could be a chivalry hipster.” He winked
and the two laughed.

As they turned toward
campus, Mark took Lucy by the hand. A chill went up her spine and
she moved closer to him.
It’s
official
, she thought,
I have a boyfriend.

Lucy stayed in a euphoric daze all the way to
English. As they approached the door, Lucy’s heart died just a
little bit. Not only did that door mean that she would be faced
with her first real encounter with Benjamin since the stabbing, but
it also meant that she wouldn’t be seeing Mark for at least four
hours.

Lucy groaned into Mark’s arm. “Do I have to
go?” She looked up into his smiling face.

“
Hey, we can skip. Maybe go to the
beach or something.”

“
Really?” she inquired
hopefully.

Mark laughed. “I wish,” he said. “But, I’ll
tell you what: let’s meet at lunch and we’ll plan what we’re going
to do this weekend.”

“
You mean after the dance, like
Saturday?”

“
Yeah, let’s go somewhere or do
something.”

Lucy’s face lit up. “I’d love to; that sounds
great.”

“
Okay, then. We’ll talk
later.”

“
Yes, we will.”

Without warning, Mark reached one
hand up to Lucy’s cheek, tilted his head toward her, and kissed her
gently on the lips. She closed her eyes, gasped, and was instantly
lost in silence and warmth as a tingling sensation filled her
entire body. His lips were surprisingly soft and felt so perfect on
hers. In the darkness, she could see all colors splashed against a
black background. She was paralyzed; her arms hung loosely at her
sides as Mark’s strong hand held its position on her cheek. But, as
all good things do, it had to end. Mark gently pulled away and
Lucy’s eyes opened as she slowly let out her breath. She just stood
staring at Mark. He slid her backpack from his shoulder and walked
her into the room. Slowly, she found her seat by the window and sat
down. The backpack was placed gently next to her chair.

“
So, I’ll see you at lunch,
then.”

“
Yeah,” Lucy responded. “I’ll see
you then.”

Mark smiled at her, then turned and walked
from the room. If Lucy had been aware of anyone else in the room,
she certainly didn’t show it.

***

The day passed too quickly for Lucy, but by
the end of it, she felt she was definitely getting more used to
having a boyfriend. At lunch they decided that they—Lucy and Mark,
and Kat and Dave—would all go north to Florence and hang out at the
north jetty, get some good clam chowder, and just hang out. It was
a perfect plan, and Lucy expressed numerous times how much she
couldn’t wait.

The drive home from school was
pleasant as Lucy basked in the euphoria of her new relationship.
She pulled into her designated part of the driveway and killed the
engine. Grabbing her bag, she headed to the door. As she crossed
the driveway, dismay gripped her body when she saw a bird lying on
its side under the tree in the front yard. Dropping her bag, she
kneeled next to it. The tiny bird was so beautiful, with its yellow
head and small gray feathers that lay delicately in
place.

The bird’s eyes were open, and Lucy was
disheartened to find that it was obviously dead. The sadness of the
scene welled up in her, and she felt almost ridiculous for her
emotions. She actually felt like crying for the small animal.
Picking it up, she could feel that it was cold and stiff. She
didn’t know how long it had been dead, but she had her suspicions
as to how it had died.

There was a new family that had
moved into a newly built home at the top of the hill whose
seven-year-old son was a terror with a BB gun. Having shot out one
of the Higgins’ garage windows shortly after arriving on the block,
there was no doubt who was responsible for the poor bird’s
demise.

Lucy held the small bird in
her hand and rolled it over, looking for the fatal wound that she
was sure would be the size of, and probably still contain, a small
copper ball shot from a seven-year-old’s personal firearm. It
didn’t take her long to find the hole. It was easily identified by
jagged, torn feathers on the neck and spotted in dark blood. Her
heart sank at the thought that the small creature had been
carelessly and thoughtlessly murdered. She was visibly upset as she
began to stroke the bird’s tiny head.

Oh, little bird, I’m so
sorry this happened to you,
she thought,
holding the inanimate creature in her palm.
I wish I could help you.

Lucy sat down against the tree,
still gently stroking the bird’s soft feathers. She felt it
ridiculous that she was reacting so strongly to something she had
seen before. Dead animals were not a new occurrence in her life.
There was always a dead cat or bird lying in a road somewhere in
Coos Bay. She never gave those much thought. She chalked her sorrow
for the bird up to the emotional roller coaster she had been on for
the past few days. She had simply reached her emotional limit and
the poor bird was the recipient of the bulk of it.

Tilting her head back against the
tree, Lucy closed her eyes. Holding the bird in her hand, she
imagined she could see him standing; he was alive in her mind,
bobbing his head and pacing up and down a branch high in a tree.
She imagined him still enjoying his life and feeling the freedom
that being a wild animal provides. Relaxing, she let herself go
with the freeing sensation of being a bird. There was peace in the
darkness of her eyelids and the brightness of her
thoughts.

The moments passed like gusts of
wind until Lucy felt something that made her freeze and reassess
the level of reality she was experiencing. Dreams had been so real
for her that she didn’t know if she had actually felt something
small gently hit the outside of her thumb and roll down her wrist.
She stayed still with her eyes closed and performed a mental
inventory of her senses to make sure she was actually awake when
she felt it.

It didn’t matter what her
conclusion might have been because, only seconds before opening her
eyes, in the center of her palm, Lucy felt warmth begin to spread
from the inside out. The bird was radiating warmth somehow; and
then she felt a rapid tapping on her skin that forced her to
finally open her eyes and look down at the creature in her hand. It
looked back at her. It was alive.

Somehow, the bird that had been
cold and dead was blinking its eyes at Lucy as it turned and cocked
its head to look around. She couldn’t believe what she was seeing.
She held it up as it stayed fixated on her. Rolling it over, she
looked on its breast for the wound she knew she had seen, but it
was gone. There was no blood, no jagged feathers. She gently
examined the full circumference of the bird’s body and found no
trace of any lethal damage. It was alive in her hand and she could
feel its little heartbeat pounding like a motor against the fleshy
palm of her hand.

Lucy leaned over and gently placed her hands
to the ground, opening her fingers. The bird hopped to its feet and
leaped gingerly down and immediately started bobbing around the
base of the tree. She was stupefied and confused. The dark blood of
the fatal wound on its feathers had been real only minutes before,
yet the bird was alive and well and pecking at the tree. In stunned
disbelief, she watched as it made its last round in the bark mulch,
looked at her, and then swiftly flew away.

Lucy leaned back against the tree, closed her
eyes and stroked the side of her face with her hand just to make
sure she was still awake. She felt real and there was no proof to
the contrary, so she opened her eyes and stood up. As she got to
her feet, something in the dirt caught the sun just right and
flashed a beam of light in her eye. Looking down to where the
glimmer had come from, she found the culprit and picked it up. It
was a single copper ball, a BB, and as she rolled it over in her
hand, she saw it was stained with a tiny spot of dark crimson
blood.

***

Life with a boyfriend was starting
to feel blissful as the week progressed. She was having the time of
her life, and she had almost fully erased Benjamin from her mind.
Even though she could somehow feel when he was around, she didn’t
care. It was the life that everyone talked about in books, relished
in movies, and sang songs about. It was love, or at least the
closest thing Lucy had ever known to love, and she was in love with
it.

Her mornings were spent in the quad, sitting
at the planter under the shade of the oak—having commandeered it
away from Samantha and her entourage—talking to, holding hands
with, nuzzling up close to, and stealing small kisses from Mark.
But the best part of the last three days was that in only one of
them had she dreamt, and it wasn’t about the rainforest or Benjamin
with a sword. It was about taking a boat ride over a sea of lava
rock while trying to avoid half-eaten gummy bears being shot at her
from a BB gun the size of a bazooka by her seven-year-old neighbor.
Lucy decided she would take the land of make-believe in her dreams
any day.

Not once since her discussion with
Kat did Lucy focus more attention on Benjamin than was necessary.
For that matter, as she walked onto campus on Friday morning, she
was quite positive she hadn’t even seen him in two days; but then,
it’s difficult to see someone you’re not looking for. Lucy was
casually walking across the parking lot when she heard footsteps
rush up behind her and felt two warm, familiar hands reach around
her and cover her eyes.

“
Guess who?” Mark’s voice melted
like honey over her morning and covered it in liquid joy. She felt
playful and childlike.

“
How many guesses do I get?” she
asked.

“
I’ll give you three.”

“
Okay. Are you the President of
the United States?”

“
Nope. Too smart.”

“
Hmm,” Lucy
hummed as she thought about his answer. “… smarter than the
President. Are you Stephen Hawking?
”

Mark laughed at the probability of her guess.
“Nope, not that smart.”

“
Well, that leaves only one other
person.”

“
Well, who’s your third guess? It
should be easy by now.” The sound of his voice brought her back to
where she wanted to be. She took a deep breath and felt herself
smile.

“
Well, if you’re
not the President, and you’re not Stephen Hawking, that must mean
you’re … Santa Claus!
”
Mark laughed loudly and Lucy spun around to face his strong
smiling countenance. She faked a look of surprise that she had lost
the game.
“
I
guess that means I lose.
”
She pretended a frown.

“
That means I get a prize, then.
So what is it, what’s my prize?” With a single motion, she closed
her eyes and pressed her lips to his. They were warm and soft,
everything she had come to know in a kiss over the last three days.
It was perfection in a finite moment. His breath tasted of
spearmint gum and his cheek held that smell that only Mark had. The
moment lasted a second and an eternity all at once, and then
eternity, in the very impossibility of itself, found an end. The
two slowly parted and Lucy took a deep breath.

“
That was nice,” Mark said,
obviously pleased with the kiss.

“
I aim to please,” replied Lucy in
a soft, but still playful tone. Mark reached out his hand and Lucy
took it.

“
Shall we, my dear?”

“
We shall,” Lucy graciously
replied, and the two walked hand in hand up the steps toward the
school.

As they walked, the planter came into view and
Kat jumped up from her perch atop Dave’s knee and pried herself
from his embrace.

“
Lucy, I have to
talk to you about tonight.” She stopped briefly to acknowledge
Mark’s presence then continued on at the speed of light. “What time
are we getting together? You know we have to do our hair; yours is
going to take like an hour alone, and mine, oh my gosh, I don’t
even want to think about it—
”

“
Whoa, slow down. It’s not a
formal; it’s just the Welcome Back dance. We can go in jeans if we
want to, right?”

Kat just gawked in disbelief. She grabbed Lucy
by the elbow and jerked her away from Mark with a semi-apologetic
smile.

“
Are you kidding me?” she said
gritting her teeth. “We both, and let me emphasize this for the
first time ever, we BOTH have boyfriends right now. Knowing me,
that might not last too long, so we’re doing this one
right.”

“
But what about the game? Am I
supposed to go in a dress and heels with my hair all done, just to
sit outside for three hours and let the air flatten it into
oblivion?”

“
Game! What game? You’re not going
to any game; I’m not going to any game. We’re going to turn
ourselves into the temptresses of the gods, so don’t even think
about going to any game!”