How to Defeat Harmful Habits (Counseling Through the Bible Series) (22 page)
Q
UESTION
: “Why do anorexics seem so determined to destroy themselves?”
A
NSWER
: The negative thinking patterns of anorexics have convinced them that…
• They don’t deserve to live.
• Their natural longing for love is not realistic.
• They have made too many mistakes.
Often the self-pity, negative thinking, and anger of anorexics cause the breakup of marriages and withdrawal of friends. In the acute stages of the disease, some try to burn themselves in hot showers, cut themselves, or jump out of buildings.
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Others become so exhausted from fighting the mental battles that they see no hope and give up on life. As the Bible says,
“Hope deferred makes the heart sick”
(P
ROVERBS
13:12).
In the period of history known as the Greco-Roman era, lifestyles of the opulent included lavish feasts and banquets, unabashed indulgences, and sometimes orgies. One common practice was vomiting after overindulging in food and alcohol to make room for more. Today the practice of “bingeing and purging” still occurs—a pattern characteristic of bulimia. In comparison to anorexia, bulimia is more frequent, harder to diagnose, more secretive, and often coexists with anorexia.
While the Bible instructs us to purge ourselves of impure evil thoughts and actions, it never even suggests that we are to purge ourselves of the food our bodies require for sustenance.
“Jesus declared all foods ‘clean’”
(M
ARK
7:19).
•
Bulimia
comes from a Greek word meaning “great hunger.”
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– Bulimics are those whose continual abnormal appetite is actually an emotional hunger that no amount of food can fill.
– The hunger that bulimics have is not necessarily a physical hunger.
– Bulimics binge in an attempt to fill their three God-given inner needs for love, significance, and security.
– They then purge to maintain or lose weight, and especially to get rid of the guilt that comes from eating too much.
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•
Bulimia
is a psychological eating disorder characterized by repeated or sporadic “binge and purge” episodes. Over time, bulimics ruminate their food.
–
Bingeing
is an unrestrained consumption of large amounts of food in a short amount of time.
–
Purging
may be done by the intentional vomiting of food or by the use of laxatives and diuretics.
–
Rumination
is the unforced regurgitation, chewing, and reswallowing of food—much like the way a cow chews its cud.
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The Bible states a clear position on the misuse of the stomach:
“Their destiny is destruction, their god is their stomach, and
their glory is in their shame. Their mind is on earthly things”
(P
HILIPPIANS
3:19).
Overeating vs. BulimiaQ
UESTION
: “What’s the difference between overeaters and bulimics?”
A
NSWER
: While both eat food to excess, an overeater may have little concern about being overweight, while the bulimic is consumed with body image and self-loathing.
Just as Job began to despise himself, bulimics despise their bodies and are frequently filled with bitterness.
“I loathe my very life; therefore I will give free rein to my complaint and speak out in the bitterness of my soul”
E. What Is Orthorexia?(J
OB
10:1).
Before manifesting obvious symptoms of anorexia, Karen Carpenter bore the trademarks of a different eating disorder. After her initial concern about her appearance, Karen got caught up in the trendy health food craze sweeping through California at the time. She cut junk food out of her diet, hired a personal trainer, and purchased exercise equipment to use at home and on tour.
But obsessing over healthy foods (orthorexia) and obsessing over exercise didn’t bring Karen the results she wanted. She became distressed when she realized that all the exercising was actually making her bulk up rather than thin down. Finally, Karen stopped most of her exercising and eventually stopped eating.
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These words from the book of Job reflect a soul in anguish:
“Sighing comes to me instead of food;
my groans pour out like water”
(J
OB
3:24).
•
Orthorexia
(or orthorexia nervosa) refers to a fixation on eating only the “right” food—an obsession with eating only healthy food.
– What a health-conscious person perceives to be healthy can later lead to severe malnutrition or even death.
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– An anorexic wants to avoid food in order to lose weight.
– An orthorexic wants to restrict food intake in order to feel pure, righteous, healthy, and natural.
Both obsessively fixate on food—the anorexic on calories and the orthorexic on purities. Both have similar character traits—they are both perfectionists, overly self-critical, obsessive-compulsive, and controlling.
•
Orthorexia
comes from a Greek word,
orth
, meaning “correct” or “right,” and another Greek word,
orexis
, meaning “appetite.”
– Foods considered unhealthy usually contain fats, preservatives, man-made food additives, animal products, or other ingredients considered by the person to be unhealthy.
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– Fruits and most vegetables are considered healthy.
Sadly, many who suffer from orthorexia set themselves up as a higher judge of foods than God Himself by declaring unclean many of the foods He has declared to be clean. The Lord gave Peter this vision:
“I saw something like a large sheet being let down from heaven by its four corners…and saw four-footed animals of the earth, wild beasts, reptiles, and birds of the air. Then I heard a voice telling me, ‘Get up, Peter. Kill and eat.’ I replied, ‘Surely not, Lord! Nothing impure or unclean has ever entered my mouth.’ The voice spoke from heaven a second time, ‘Do not call anything impure that God has made clean’”
(A
CTS
11:5-9).
OrthorexiaQ
UESTION
:
“Is there an easy way to determine whether I am orthorexic?”
A
NSWER
:
Yes, there is a simple way to assess whether you might be having a problem with orthorexia. Honestly answer the following questions:
• Are you increasingly confining yourself to rigid rules for eating healthy foods?
• Are you concerned only about benefiting from food, and not enjoying it?
• Are you socially isolating yourself because of your special diet of “healthy” food?
If you answered
yes
to these questions, you are either presently suffering from orthorexia or well on your way. You would benefit from learning to develop a healthy,
balanced
view of food.
In the process, you will need to abandon your desire for control and relinquish the reins of your life to God—the only One who can truly grant you freedom and meet your every need.
“His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given
us his very great and precious promises, so that through
them you may participate in the divine nature and escape
the corruption in the world caused by evil desires”
(2 P
ETER
1:3-4).
One day, 14-year-old Sally saw
Babe
, an adorable movie about an endearing talking pig who saved the lives of numerous talking animals. Babe’s heart went out to all the vulnerable farm animals (who were somewhat humanized in the film). So did Sally’s heart.
As a result, young Sally felt sorry for any turkey that could be roasted, for any goose that could be cooked, for any pig that could be barbecued.
Sally felt so sorry for any and all animals that could be killed for food that soon after, she became a vegetarian. After she eliminated all meat—a significant source of protein—from her diet, she reasoned that she could meet her body’s need for protein through eating beans.
But then Sally became avidly against eating the beans she needed to eat to get protein into her system. Soon Sally became skin and bones, and her parents feared for her life.
If only Sally—and all those who struggle with any kind of eating disorder—would accept the truth that God values us so much that He gives us everything we need to sustain us:
“Everything that lives and moves will be food for you. Just as I gave you the green plants, I now give you everything…All flocks and herds, and the beasts of the field, the birds of the air, and the fish of the sea, all that swim the paths of the seas”
(G
ENESIS
9:3; P
SALM
8:7-8).
•
EDNOS
—some eating disorders have this psychological classification, which stands for Eating Disorders Not Otherwise Specified.
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These eating disorders can be as dangerous as specified eating disorders.
•
EDNOS
is the category for eating disorders that do not match
all
the characteristics for either anorexia or bulimia.
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For example:
Meeting the anorexic criteria except not being underweight
Meeting the anorexic criteria except still having regular menses
Bingeing and purging or using laxatives (for weight control) only a few times a month (that is, far less regularity than bulimia)
Purging only small amounts of food (such as three crackers)
“Chewing and spitting” (the addictive disorder of chewing a large amount of food and then spitting it out to avoid swallowing it and to avoid the guilt of eating “bad food”)
All those with an eating disorder are guilt-ridden because they have made for themselves unreasonable rules and unattainable goals regarding food and weight. Their guilt is not true guilt but rather false guilt. It is a guilt of their own making. They could fully identify with this heart cry from the Bible:
“If I am guilty—woe to me! Even if I am innocent, I cannot lift
my head, for I am full of shame and drowned in my affliction”
(J
OB
10:15).
Body Dysmorphic DisorderQ
UESTION
: “What exactly is body dysmorphia disorder, and how does it relate to eating disorders?”
A
NSWER
:
Body dysmorphic disorder
is a psychiatric disorder in which a person is excessively concerned about an imagined or minor defect in their physical features.
26
• This disorder may result in a person’s complaining of several specific features, a single feature, a vague feature, or their general appearance, causing a psychological distress that impairs the person’s occupational and/or social functioning, sometimes to the point of complete social isolation.
• For example, Karen Carpenter appeared to single out her stomach as the target of concern. Over time, this concern evolved into full-blown anorexia. The end result was that she starved herself to death in an attempt to get rid of a perceived bulge in her stomach.
• Those who suffer from body dysmorphia have a perception disorder that prevents them from perceiving truth rather than error.
Whenever we live with deception, we cannot walk in freedom. That is why we need to be willing to hear the truth about ourselves:
“‘You live in the midst of deception’…declares the L
ORD
”
(J
EREMIAH
9:6).
The compulsion not to eat proved catastrophic.
In January 1982, Karen Carpenter began seeing a therapist five times a week for 11 months, which met with problematic, not positive, results. By the end of the year, Karen weighed 80 pounds. She was hospitalized and underwent a medical procedure that increased her weight by 25 pounds, but Richard still felt quite unsettled about her condition.
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Although Karen’s body appeared healthier, her energy had been sapped from her years of physical and emotional struggle. Most disturbing of all, according to Richard, the “life had gone out of her eyes.”
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Tragically, about three months later, the life had gone out of her body.
Karen’s untimely death left many questions unanswered for her family and fans. One question begs to be answered by all who put their lives at risk over food:
“Why do I put myself in jeopardy
and take my life in my hands?”
(J
OB
13:14).
•
Obsessions
are intrusive, anxiety-producing thoughts that preoccupy the struggler’s mind. “God says I must fast. If I eat food, I am guilty of disobeying Him. Eating food is bad and sinful.”
•
Compulsions
are persistent drives or irresistible impulses to behave in ways that tend to make a person become irrational.
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“I must fast, walk, and pray, but I must not eat. I will not eat!”
•
Compulsions
drive those with an eating disorder to eliminate food or fat by a variety of means: strict dieting and fasting, emetics and self-induced vomiting, multiple laxatives and diuretics, strenuous physical exercise and smoking, ADD medications and diet pills, and drinking large amounts of caffeinated coffee and tea.
– An
emetic
is a drug that causes vomiting.
– A
laxative
is a drug that causes bowel elimination.
– A
diuretic
is a drug that causes an increase in the flow of urine.
The struggler who is controlled by these obsessions and compulsions is severely out of control.
“Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control”
(P
ROVERBS
25:28).
In the midst of all her struggles, did Karen Carpenter ever get a glimpse of God’s unconditional love? Was she aware that He loved her whether she was overweight, underweight, no matter her weight? She mattered to Him, not the numbers on her scales.
Such is the love of God—boundless and beautiful, deep and abiding. Once they experience the extraordinary unconditional love of God, many strugglers discover the light of hope on the path toward healing.
“The L
ORD
your God is with you, he is mighty to save
.
He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love
,
he will rejoice over you with singing”
(Z
EPHANIAH
3:17).
HARACTERISTICS OF
A
NOREXIA AND
B
ULIMIA
“It really was Elvis Presley time again.”
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That’s how world-renowned Elton John described his wake-up call to not only seek help for his drug addiction, but also for his bulimia. Elvis Presley—a childhood musical icon for Elton—also suffered from bulimia and was also consumed by other compulsive behaviors. When Elton finally got the chance to meet Elvis in the 1970s, he walked away in tears, aghast at the bloated, visibly troubled figure that had just stood before him.
Not wanting to end up like Elvis, the five-time Grammy award winner sought help for his addictions. “I had to change because I was frightened. I didn’t want to die angry and bitter and sad, and that’s what I had become, physically ugly, spiritually ugly, a slob, a pig.”
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As the saying goes, appearances can be deceiving. So much so that often they hide an anguishing heart.
“The troubles of my heart have multiplied;
free me from my anguish”
(P
SALM
25:17).
“Despite all the success, I think I just wanted to be loved. I wanted someone to love me.”
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A low sense of self-worth, loneliness, and depression marked Elton John’s days as he battled bulimia. He turned to food for comfort to meet his hunger for love. But even an international rock superstar can’t escape what those with eating disorders experience.
Instead of being the source of love, Elton’s bulimia became the source of self-loathing. His actions and appearance distressed him, and he remembers saying to himself, “Here you are, just sitting here, fat, [with] vomit all over your dressing gown.”
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And Elton found out later that just as he had walked away from Elvis in tears back in the 1970s, in the 1980s people had walked away from Elton in tears, saddened by his spiraling, out-of-control state.
So in 1990, Elton John checked into a Chicago rehabilitation clinic and devoted a full year toward recovery—no touring, no recording commitments.
Those who suffer with bulimia engage in a recurring cyclical pattern of binge eating (uncontrollable bursts of overeating) followed by overcompensatory behaviors such as crash dieting, overexercising, and purging. Those caught in this cycle desperately need to access the power of God in their fight to gain freedom from these two addictions, these two enemies—bingeing and purging. Those who do can say with the prophet Samuel,
“He rescued me from my powerful enemy
,
from my foes, who were too strong for me”
(2 S
AMUEL
22:18).
Binge episodes are often compared to…
• Feeling instantaneously comforted
• Experiencing a physical high
• Going on autopilot
• Losing control
• Numbing out
Overcompensatory behaviors are the means a bulimic uses to get rid of excess calories and regain control over mind, body, and food. But those who engage in such maladaptive behaviors only end up feeling famished and emotionally empty again, which then leads to another uncontrollable binge, and thus the cycle repeats itself.
Bulimics engage in extreme obsessive-compulsive eating and exercise habits, and these, in turn, often flow over into other destructive behaviors such as sexual promiscuity, pathological lying, and shoplifting.
They…
• Practice a strict diet with intervals of binge eating—consuming large amounts of food in a short period of time
• Communicate great guilt or severe shame due to eating so much
• Cope with emotional stress through overeating/bingeing
• Focus excessively on their body shape and weight even though they may have normal weight or be underweight
They…
• Practice self-induced vomiting after eating
• Suffer from general depression
• Lack self-control when it comes to food
• Experience possible fluctuations in weight
They…
• Exercise excessively and compulsively
• Base their self-worth on personal performance
• Abuse laxatives or diuretics
• Push their bodies way beyond normal healthy limits
Those who binge and purge cannot be at rest. Their obsession over food allows them no peace. They could have written these words spoken by Job himself:
“I have no peace, no quietness;
I have no rest, but only turmoil”
(J
OB
3:26).
Emotional or Binge EaterQ
UESTION
:
“How can I tell if I am an emotional or binge eater?”
A
NSWER
:
It’s not out of the norm for all of us to occasionally turn to food for comfort—whether we are trying to wind down with a cola and fries after a long day or cool down with a pint of ice cream after an argument. But when eating becomes the main strategy for managing emotions and dealing with stress, it can develop into an unhealthy and uncontrollable food addiction.
The Emotional Eater:
Do you use food to…
Feel better about yourself?
Calm down or soothe your nerves?
Cope with stress or worries?
Escape from problems?
Fill a void in your life?
Reward yourself?
Cheer yourself up?
Emotional eating
can be triggered by a depressed or anxious mood, but also when a person feels tense, lonely, or bored. Men who are suffering from what’s been coined
manorexia
, or bulimia, can also struggle with shame because eating disorders are primarily associated with adolescent girls and young women.
Emotional eaters
eat to fill their emotional emptiness rather than their physical emptiness. The problem is that emotional eating doesn’t solve anything. It may offer momentary comfort, but eventually reality will set in, along with regret and self-loathing.
If you answer
yes
to more than half of the questions below, you likely have a binge-eating problem.
The Binge Eater:
Do you…
Eat in secret?
Eat until you feel sick?
Feel out of control when you eat?
Feel disgusted or ashamed after you eat?
Think about food most of the time?
Eat to escape from worries or to comfort yourself?
