Hiding In His Dreams (7 page)

“
Are you feeling better?”
She set the tray on the bedside table.

“
Yes I am, much better.” he
said. “In fact, I’m feeling so well I can probably even look over
that contract.”

She frowned. “Not before you’ve had a
light dinner.” She broke the crackers into bite-sized pieces and
sprinkled them into the soup.

She lifted the tray onto the bed, and
proceeded to spoon-feed him. He propped a pillow behind his back
and sat up.

“
Open up,” she
ordered.

Obediently, he did.

The hot liquid went down comfortably.
After she had fed him most of the soup, Luke summoned the strength
to get out of bed.

“
Hey, I’m feeling all
better,” he exclaimed, stretching his arms.

“
Luke?” She sat down on the
bed, her face somber. He turned to face her, and knew that
something was up.

“
Am I a good caretaker? I
mean, am I good to you?”

The question caught him off-guard. He
had no answer prepared.

“
You’re a pediatric nurse
and a first-grade teacher,” he finally replied. “Taking care of
people is what you do.”

She shook her head. “No, that’s not
what I mean. You heard my mom. I couldn’t even cook
soup.”

He reached for the soup on the bedside
table, and put a spoonful in his mouth. “What are you talking
about? This is delicious.”

He was in awe. She had always seemed so
perfect to him. But now, she had a flaw. Her insecurity. It was
something he could never imagine she would have.

She hung her head. “When I was little,
my mom would always tell me how I couldn’t do anything right. One
time when I was 16, she was sick. Really sick. So I made her soup
for dinner, and fed it to her in bed. She spat it out right away,
all over me. Said it tasted like crap. Too bland.”

He had a burning urge to punch her
mother in the face. Instead, he settled for words.

“
Forgot your mother,” he
said. “She’s a hypercritical, sour old lady. It was probably about
something else. She was just taking her anger out on
you.”

“
I think I might still have
the scars from the scalding soup.” She lifted her sleeves, and
tried searching for the scars.

When he looked at her again, he saw
that she was crying. He had never seen that before. She had always
seemed so strong to him. He thought that as a pediatric nurse, she
must have seen her share of tragedies, but became strong and
emotionally detached to deal with them.

It made him feel closer to
her.

Instinctively, he sat down on the bed,
and hugged her. She put her head on his shoulder. Her tears leaked
onto his shoulder, staining it. Pretty soon, his shoulder was
wet.

“
No, you’re a great
caretaker,” he said. “I’ll protect you from her. I won’t let her
hurt you again.”

He started to kiss parts of her face as
she continued to sob. He started with her cheek, then worked his
way down to her chin, then back up to her forehead.

“
You took care of me today,”
he whispered, as he kissed her earlobe. “You took really good care
of me.”

She said nothing, but continued to
weep.

Neither talked. The only sound was the
steady rumble of the traffic outside.

He felt the heat of her body against
his as he wrapped his arms around her. They stayed in that position
for a long time.

* * * * *

Chapter 6

A few weeks
later…

One morning, Luke and Alyssa were both
getting ready for work. As he was tying his tie, he noticed that
Alyssa’s face was pale.

She cupped her hands to her mouth, and
lurched forward.

“
Are you OK?” he
asked.

She didn’t answer, but instead, rushed
into their en suite bathroom.

He rushed over to the doorway, just in
time to see her bend over the toilet, throwing up.

“
Alyssa?”

She continued to vomit.

“
I’m OK,” she said, between
gasps of air. “You’re going to be late. Go on to work.” She turned
to face him. Her hair was a mess.

Ignoring her, he strode over, but
Alyssa was insistent. “No, really, I’m fine. Just go on to
work.”

“
I’ll take you to the
doctor.”

“
No, I can take myself. It’s
fine. You have to get to work.”

He recognized that tone. He was
concerned, but knew there was nothing he could do once she became
insistent.

“
You better stay home,” he
said. “I’ll call you from work.”

He took one last look at her before he
left. She didn’t look sick. There was something in her eyes. A
twinkle. A twinkle of something…anticipation, he decided. Yes, that
was it. Anticipation. But of what?

* * * * *

Luke stared at the documents on his
desk. They were compiling up in front of him. The deadline loomed
in his head. Only another week to go. And he was nowhere near
done.

He thought about what his boss had said
a month earlier.

Is something distracting
you?

If something was, he was not going to
let it.

He continued to pour over the
documents, but something was nagging at the back of his
mind.

Kids.

Alyssa wanted kids and
marriage.

He wanted neither, just yet
anyway.

It was not that he did not like kids.
It was just that it was too soon for him. He wanted to be further
established in his career before he had them. That way, he could
provide a better future for his children, something his own father
never did for him.

He looked at the clock. 12
noon.

It was time to check on his girlfriend.
He picked up the phone and was about to dial home, when someone
knocked on the door. It was Alyssa, and she was all
smiles.

“
What are you doing here?”
he said, smiling back. “I was just about to call you. Are you
feeling better?”

“
Much better,” she said.
“
A lot
better.”

There was something about her emphasis
that made him curious.

She ran a hand through her long hair.
“So I went to Station Square Medical Clinic this morning. I‘m in
perfect health.”

She smiled, but it was no ordinary
smile. There was something mischievous in it.

“
Or,” she continued, “should
I say that
we’re
in
perfect health?”

“
We? That must be one
psychic doctor.”

“
I don’t mean you and me,
silly.” She flipped her hair behind her back.

He narrowed his eyes at her. “Are you
flirting with me? Because if you are, you don’t have to. I’m
already yours.” He grinned at her.

So that was her little game. Was she
trying to inject more passion into their relationship by showing up
in the middle of the workday and flirt with him?

She pointed to her stomach. “We,” she
said. Her face mirrored that of a little girl excited to go to the
carnival.

Then, it dawned on him.

As it struck him, he was frozen. He had
no idea what to feel, or what to say.

“
But how?” he said,
furrowing his eyebrows. “We used….”

“
I know,” she interrupted.
“But there was still a chance. And we were heading in that
direction anyway.”

She stared at him. “You’re not
excited.” It was a statement of fact, and not a
question.

He smiled, and opened up his face. “No,
I am. It’s great. Since when?”

“
A few weeks. I was late
this month. And then it never came. This explains a lot.” She
pointed to her stomach. “The doctor wants me to see an ob-gyn to
check its health and sex soon.”

She cupped her hands on her stomach
protectively. “Can you imagine? We’re going to be parents. And I’m
going to be a mommy.”

He touched her stomach. It felt normal,
but he knew everything was about to change.

He enveloped her in a hug. He breathed
in once. Normally, he would enjoy the fragrance of her peach
perfume, but this breath was to ensure that he was actually awake,
and not dreaming.

* * * * *

The news sank in slowly over the next
few days. He was going to be a father. He may not have been ready,
but the baby was coming. He was going to make himself ready. He
would work extra hard to make sure the baby would be born into a
loving family with financial means.

For a moment, he thought that the child
might not have been his, but to think that Alyssa would flirt with
infidelity was unthinkable. She was simply not that
type.

On the third day after the big news, he
decided to surprise Alyssa at work. He strolled down the halls of
Dr. F.D. Sinclair Elementary School. It had been a very long time
since he had last been in an elementary school. As his head nearly
bumped the ceiling of the hall, he marveled at how miniature
everything.

He arrived in front of Room 16,
Alyssa’s classroom, a few minutes after dismissal. He peered in and
saw her behind her desk, speaking in tender tones to a little Asian
girl. His girlfriend looked the part. She had her hair in a bun,
and wore glasses that made her look very intelligent.

“
But it’s so hard,” the
little girl complained. “I don’t get it.”

“
No, it’s really not,”
Alyssa replied. “Let me show you.”

From a container on her desk, she
poured out a bunch of bingo chips. “If you have five chips, how
many would you have if you took away two?”

The little Asian girl stared at her
teacher. “I don’t know.”

“
Why don’t you try it?”
Alyssa said, without changing her tender tone of voice. “Take away
two.”

The girl looked at Alyssa hesitantly,
as though she was just told she was being fed to the lions.
Gingerly, she reached out one hand, and took away two bingo
chips.

“
Now count the chips that
are left.”

The little girl put one finger on a
chip, then the one next to it, then the one next to that. “One,
two, three.”

“
So how many have you
counted?”

The little girl shrugged.

Alyssa’s expression remained the
same.

“
Try it again, sweetie.
Count it.”

The girl counted to three.

“
So how many do you have
left?”

The girl stared at her instructor
blankly.

“
Go on,” Alyssa coaxed.
“Count the chips again and tell me the last number.”

“
One. Two.
Three.”

“
Three.” The girl’s face lit
up and Alyssa smiled.

As Luke watched her interact with her
student, he knew there was no doubt that she was going to be a
great mother. And he could imagine that that little girl was
theirs. He could imagine picking her up from school, reading fairy
tales to her at bedtime, then tucking her in.

The little girl waved her arms in the
air. “Three,” she repeated in awe.

“
You did it. High five!”
Alyssa stuck out one palm, and the little girl high-fived
her.

Luke waited until the little girl left
the classroom through the other door, then proceeded to turn the
knob of the door he was leaning against.

He froze when he saw Alyssa take out
something from her drawer.

It was a book. A tattered,
yellowed-paged book.

He could just make out the
title.
The Big Book of Baby
Names.

Luke watched as she thumbed through the
dog-eared pages, humming to herself.

“
Tanya,” she
said.

She turned a page. “Denise.”

She turned another page. “Shaylee. It
means ‘of the field.’”

“
I like Shaylee,” she added
as an afterthought.

“
I like it too,” Luke said,
opening the door.

Alyssa looked up from her book, and
squealed. She hurried toward him and dove into his arms.

“
You never surprise me at
work,” she said, laughing.

He kissed her on the cheek. “I thought
it was about time I did.”

“
If you like ‘Shaylee’ too,
then ‘Shaylee’ it is. Are you ready to be a daddy?” she
asked.

He nodded. “I am. And I want to have a
family with you.”

Her eyes widened. “Are you asking me to
marry you?”

He froze. He hadn’t thought about that
yet. He could not believe that he had not. He struggled to compose
himself. “I have to do it the right way. With a ring and a romantic
setting and all that. And you can’t know it’s coming.”

She nodded, and smiled coyly. “Of
course.”

He reached out one hand and placed it
gently on her stomach. “May I?”