Hard Core (16 page)

Chapter 36

-Jacy-

Rachel came into
the shop and pulled down one of the chairs I’d just put up on the table. She sat down with a plunk. “This new relationship with Quinn has my head spinning so much, I just put bananas in my maple oat scones. And, surprisingly, they didn’t taste too bad. Might just have to come up with a new name for them.”

“So, if he’s got your head spinning, that’s a good thing, right?”

“Oh yeah.” She leaned back and watched me as I finished wiping down my counters. “Are you really just going to let him leave, walk out of your life for good?”

“Let him? How do you know he doesn’t want to leave? After that terrible incident with James, any man with half a brain would run from me. I come with some pretty crappy baggage.”

“Bullshit. The only baggage was James, and after his escape trick, it sounds as if you won’t have to worry about seeing him for a long time.”

I stopped my cleaning and walked over to pull down a second chair. “But I won’t ever be rid of James. I see that now.”

“Which means, you need to be with someone who can keep you safe. Someone who loves you enough to stick around, baggage or not. You need that man. You need Ledger. When you were with him, you were smiling and laughing. I hardly ever saw you sink into that dark mood that used to grip you.”

I looked at her.

“Yes, I saw it. You thought you were covering it up, but I knew when your past was pulling you down. I always knew. I just worked to get you out of the mood rather than pester you about it.”

“You’re a true friend. I don’t know if a relationship is what I need right now, Rach.”

“You’re right. You should just wait it out. Because, as we both know so well, men like Ledger come around every few days. A dime a dozen, right?” She patted my leg. “Got to go clean up my kitchen. See you later.”

She placed the chair back on the table and walked out. There was a skip in her step. It had been there since she’d started dating Quinn. It seemed this time she might just have found Mr. Right.

I stood and placed the chair back on the table. Mr. Right? Was I letting mine go? Was I sabotaging my own happiness yet again?

Chapter 37

-Ledger-

The good thing
about not having a lot of stuff was that it made moving day very easy. My truck was loaded down with the mattress, microwave and mini refrigerator. I’d decided to trash the beach chairs and chaise. I might even invest in a couch and television eventually. The house looked even shabbier with nothing in it. The stains on the walls and floors were more pronounced. But I was going to miss the place. I’d grown used to living on the beach, and even though I’d promised Mike I would visit, I knew it wouldn’t be as often. But I needed to assure Jacy that she didn’t have to worry about me hanging around. After the incident with James, she’d seen to it that I got my cut stitched up. Then it was obvious she’d needed time alone. She hadn’t forgiven me yet, and I doubted she ever would.

I turned out the lights and shut the door. I took one last look at the beach. It was a bright, sunny day. The sun glinted off of Jacy’s front window. It made my chest tight to think that I’d never see her again. She’d turned out to be everything I’d imagined and more.

I walked with heavy steps to my truck. Jacy was leaning against it with a basket in her hand.

I reached the truck and stood in front of her, not sure what to say and trying to keep my heart from beating loud enough for her to hear.

The smile that I had etched in my memory like a photograph appeared as she lifted up the basket of muffins. “I thought it was time for another redo. Hi, I’m Jacy. I wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood. And I still didn’t make the muffins.”

“Then maybe I’m talking to the wrong girl.”

“Maybe.” She shrugged and turned away.

I took hold of her hand. I reached for the basket and placed it on the hood of the truck. Then I pulled her around to face me. My fingers swept over her skin as I pushed a strand of her unruly hair off her face. “But . . . I’m pretty sure I’m not. In fact, for a long time, I knew exactly the girl I wanted. Long before I even met her.”

“Rachel insists it’s romantic—having a man fall in love with me just from stories about my life.”

“And what do you think?”

“Not sure. But I know this—I know I was perfectly and exquisitely happy when I was with you. Maybe it was meant to be. In a weird way, maybe fate put you in that cell with James so that we could be together.”

I stared down at her hand in mine. “I have no right to ask you to stay with me, but I can assure you that I have no more secrets.” I lifted my gaze to hers. “No more surprises. I stepped out of prison with no options, no real family or friends left who gave a damn about me, and my future seemed just as dark as my past. But there was this one tiny, sparkling light, and I decided I had to search it out. If nothing else I had to prove to myself that there was a reason to turn my life around. That people like you existed. I know it sounds strange as hell, like the whole fucking story, but in a convoluted way, Jacy, you saved my life.”

Her blue eyes glassed with tears, and she forced a smile. “I guess that makes us even then.” She took a deep breath. “So, redo?”

“Oh yeah.” I pulled her into my arms and kissed her.

Epilogue

-Jacy-

Six months later

It wasn’t quite
summer yet, but the fringes of it hung in the warm air and on the smiling faces of the pedestrians on the pier. Ledger’s smile was biggest of all.

“Mike,” Ledger called, “we’re going to go buy some shaved ice to celebrate me passing my first certification test. What flavor?”

Mike was adjusting a bike seat for a customer. He looked up from his task. With the cold weather gone, he was back to Hawaiian print shirts and sandals. “No thanks. Doctor said I have to go easy on sugar.” He straightened and patted his belly, which had shrunk considerably since winter. “Besides, I’m working on my summer figure.”

Ledger and I laughed and continued along the pier to the shaved ice stand. With each day closer to summer, more and more of the vendors were returning, setting up for the summer vacation gold rush.

I slid my phone back into my pocket after a text conversation with my mom. “All right. I think our calendar is set. Your mom is visiting in June, and my parents will be here in July.”

For the first time since Ledger had gotten the letter that he passed his test, his smile faded.

I took hold of his arm. “My parents will love you. I’m sure of it. So stop with the sad face.”

“All right, sad face gone.”

“My mom had some news about James. He pled guilty to breaking and entering and assault instead of standing trial for attempted murder. That, coupled with his escape act, he’ll be in for eight years, and not in that silly, posh prison like before. He’ll be back in the real deal, with security and barbed wire and guards.”

“Just thinking about that much time in the state penn sends a chill through my bones. I don’t envy him, but he’s getting what he deserved.”

I was more than relieved to know that for at least the next eight years, I didn’t have to give James another thought. I was sure in that length of time, he’d forget all about me.

“Ooh, there’s an empty bench.” I pointed to the railing. “You get the ice, and I’ll grab the seat. Don’t forget, I want half strawberry and half lemon.”

Ledger nodded. “Right. Does it matter which side the strawberry is on?”

“Funny man. Now hurry. There is no one in line.”

Ledger walked toward the stand, and I headed over to the bench. The water was choppy and rough, but several sailboats were braving the bumpy ride as they cruised out toward open sea. A shadow passed overhead. I shaded my eyes with my hand and stared up. Three pelicans flew with outstretched wings over the water. They circled around, staying close to the end of the pier where people were fishing. 

A text came through from Rachel. “Contractor will meet with us on Monday at noon.”

I texted back. “Perfect.”

Rather than desert me for a restaurant pastry chef job, Rachel had decided that working directly with her boyfriend, Quinn, wouldn’t be good for their relationship. I agreed with her heartily, although my motives were more selfish. I didn’t want to lose her. Instead, her boyfriend, a successful businessman, bought the two shops we were leasing. He was also paying a contractor to open that wall and create the single bakery and coffee shop Rachel and I had always dreamed of. It was rare when everything in my life lined up so happily, but I wasn’t going to question it or worry about it. I was just going to go along with it. Maybe I’d already gone through my terrible rough patch, and the rest would be smooth sailing.

As I gazed out at the ocean, daydreaming about my good fortune, a woman pushed a baby stroller up to the railing right next to the bench. A baby, maybe a year old with pretty blonde curls and pink cheeks was smiling and holding onto a cookie.

“Look, Amber, see those big birds. Those are pelicans, and they scoop up fish to eat in their big bills.”

The baby was more interested in the cookie than the giant birds, but she smiled at the sound of her mom’s voice.

“How old is she?” I asked.

The mother smiled proudly down at the little girl. “She’ll be one next month. Such a fun time. She is curious about everything.”

“She’s beautiful.”

“Thank you,” the mother said.

I was still gazing at the baby but I heard Leger come around to the front of the bench and sit down.

The baby pointed at the colorful ice in Ledger’s hand and made a cooing sound.

The mother laughed. “She’s especially curious about things she can put in her mouth. Well, have a nice day.”

“You too.”

She walked away with her stroller. I turned to Ledger. He watched me closely as he handed me the ice.

“I’m fine,” I assured him. “It took a long time, but I can actually look at babies now and not fall completely apart.” I glanced back over the bench. The woman and baby had stopped to look at the seashells hanging in front of a shop. I turned back around and leaned against the bench. “I’ve got so much to do with the new shop and everything, but once it’s done—” I looked up at him. It seemed he knew exactly what I was thinking. “I want to be a mother again.”

His fingers were cold from holding the ice as he reached up and pressed his hand against my face. “You’d make a great mom.” He kissed me. “And I think I might even be all right at the dad thing. I had a good model.”

I kissed him and took a lick of ice. “I don’t know about you, but this whole life redo thing is really working out for me.” “Yep, it’s working out just fine.”

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