Get It Done When You're Depressed (2 page)

Now think about what others say to you. Put a check next to the comments that sound familiar:

Perhaps most important when you’re batting depression, as we can sometimes be our own harshest critic, think about what you say to yourself. Put a check next to the following that you’ve thought or said:

The effects of depression can seem endless. They can affect your life in every area and make you feel that things will
never
get better. And unfortunately, some people don’t see depression as an illness and can say hurtful things. But the main problem is how you treat yourself. When depression takes over and you say the same hurtful things to yourself as others say to you, it’s difficult to get better. When you start getting things done, that negative self-talk can turn into more positive talk, and that’s just what you need.

Most of us have to work to earn a paycheck to support ourselves and our family. But working is only part of what you have to do during the day, and only one of the many things that might feel utterly impossible to accomplish when you’re depressed.

The saying “Start where you are” is very useful here. For some people, getting things done really does mean getting out of bed in the morning and at least going through the motions of the day. For others, it may be finishing work projects or studying for an exam. You just have to get started doing something. Chances are, that something will lead to something else, and so on, and before you know it, you’ll have a few things checked off your to-do list.

Picture this scenario: your partner walks into your room and sees you lying in bed, crying. He walks up to you and puts his hand on your head.

“You’re burning up!” he says. Then he hears you cough. “Oh no! That sounds terrible. You need to go to the doctor.”

“No, I’m not that bad,” you say. “I just need to rest and get better.”

“What are you talking about? This is dangerous! You might have pneumonia. I’m taking you to the emergency room right now.”

Now picture this scenario: your partner walks into your room and sees you lying in bed, crying.

“What’s wrong?” he asks. “Why are you still in bed? It’s so dark in here! You really need to get up and do something. You’ve missed work three days this week!”

You start to cry and say, “I just can’t seem to get better. I don’t want to live like this anymore.”

“I don’t know how to help you,” he says, scared and/or frustrated. “I don’t know what you need. You just need to get up so you can get better!”

You continue to lie there, filled with despair because you don’t have the energy or the desire to get up. He walks out of the room ….

Even though it’s often not seen this way, depression is a physiological illness that needs to be treated as compassionately and as successfully as any physical illness. No matter whether your depression is the result of a certain, recent event or if your depression has been around for years, the fact is that your brain is not functioning correctly. You need to do all you can to get better, just as you would if you had pneumonia or some other physical illness.

You already know you’re depressed, and you’re probably trying to get better in a variety of ways, but what do you do while you’re trying and the depression is still around? You take action. That’s what this book is about—taking action—and that’s what the strategies in this book help you do. The strategies help with work, home life, school, and relationships, enabling you to take action even when that feels impossible. When you take action and fight back, you can get things done—you just need tools that are stronger than depression.

There’s a person without depression inside you. This is the real you, the you outside the illness. The strategies in this book teach you to override depression so you can act like the real you, the person who
can
get things done. This is never easy, as the illness may have dictated your behavior for many years, but change—and sometimes extreme change—
is
possible.

The stories in this book represent the personal histories of people with depression as told to the authors. The names and some details such as gender and profession have been changed to protect the teller’s privacy. In some instances, what’s printed is a composite of stories told by more than one person.

The “My Story” features have
not
been changed. Julie is very open about her own depression and the many mistakes she has made while learning to manage this illness successfully.

Get It Done When You’re Depressed
is not a depression treatment book, although it can be used as a companion to any other professional and personal treatments you’re currently using. But there’s no question that once you implement the strategies in this book and become more productive, your depression can definitely lessen. For some, it may go away completely. But for those whose depression treatment is ongoing or has not yet responded to other treatments, this book can be used as an integral part of an overall treatment strategy.

Getting things done is one of the best ways to feel better about yourself, which is automatically an antidote to depression. When you can go to bed feeling better than when you woke up, that’s an accomplishment you can be proud of.

Many people equate depression with the
inability
to work. In reality, the problem is often the inability to
feel
like working. People who are depressed assume that their lack of motivation is a sign of weakness, and if they could just buck up a bit, they would be more productive.

But waiting until you feel like doing something is the single biggest mistake you can make when you’re depressed and need to get things done. Working when you think you can’t is one of the main difficulties you may face when you’re depressed, which is why you have to be ready to work no matter how you feel.

There’s a big difference between the great feeling of motivation that comes when you want to do a project and the lack of motivation you feel when you wake up feeling down with low energy. It’s natural that when you
feel
motivated, you can get things done more easily and feel a sense of accomplishment while you work. When you’re depressed you often lack motivation, so as much as you might want to feel the desire to work, it simply isn’t there.