Gazelle (29 page)

“
She definitely
nags
like a wife
,
” Julian laughs.

              Alice laughs into a snort, shoving Julian who braces against her and pushes back. 

“
Wha
t’
s so funny
?
” Anthony asks, coming up alongside them.

“
Alice was telling us about her cooking.  How sh
e‘
cook
s
’ for Julian
,
” Will says, raising his eyebrows.

“
What?!Like, Top Ramen, right
?
”
“
You guys are the worst.  Totally embarrassing me.  I cook good, tell them, Julian
.
”
              Julian nods.  More reserved and on guard with Anthony present, he stops laughing and drops his attention to his plate.
 “
She does.  She makes a pretty good lentil soup
.
”
“
Is that right
?
” Anthony asks, his eyes moving over Alice, his mouth moving into a slow smile.
 “
You never made me lentil soup
.
”
              Alice smiles and looks up at him, bringing her beer to her mouth and taking a drink before answering.
 “
You?  Eat lentils?  Yo
u’
d never touch lentils.  Too healthy
.
”
“
Not true
,
” he says, moving before her with his hands in his pockets, his legs slightly spread.
 “
If you made it,
I’
d eat it
.
”
“
Ooo, be careful, dude
,
” Will says
,“
Remember them potatoes
?
”
“
Do you even
know
what a lentil is
?
” Alice asks seductively, standing slowly in front of him.

              He smiles and drops his gaze to the side before looking at her again.
 “
It do
n’
t matter,
I’
d eat it
.
”

              Julian stiffens, watching the sexual tension between them, fighting his sudden confusing jealousy.  He glances at Will and Trina, Trina watching him closely and deciphering what he is feeling.  He quickly drinks his beer and regains his composure.

“
Dance with me
,
” Anthony says softly, pulling Alice into the haze of twinkling lights and lawn elves.

              They move to the middle.  He pulls her to his chest, holding her hand in his as they sway.  Will sighs, taking the beer from Chris and drinking it.
 “
A
y…
here we go again.  It wo
n’
t last
.
”
“
What do you mean
?
”
 
Julian asks.
 “
What wo
n’
t
?
”
“
This-them, right now.  In an hour, the
y’
ll be fighting again.  Ther
e’
s nothing he can do or say tha
t’
ll bring her back
.
”
“
You do
n’
t know that
,
” Trina says, still watching Julian.

“
Yeah, I do.  Alice was broken before him.  And he has
n’
t changed, that ma
n’
s still a dawg, always will be.  He wo
n’
t, not for her, not for anyone
.
”

              Julian watches Alice and Anthony, studying Alic
e’
s face, so calm and sweet, cat eyes closed, cheeks flushed from drinking.  He looks to Anthon
y’
s face, staring at the crowd of people in the house where it is more rambunctious with laughter and life, his longing plain, his acting terrible, and Julian has never hated anyone more.

“
Wha
t’s‘
praying mantis
?
’”

              The restaurant is not loud enough,the tables are packed too closely together.  The lights are dim and the ambiance very peaceful in a rust and orange haze about them.   Though she asked softly, it was still loud enough that any response he made would be heard all around them.  He pretends he did
n’
t hear the question, separating the cilantro foam from his sliver of sea bass.

“
Julian?  Did you hear me
?
”
              He glances up at the beautiful woman, her hair hanging around her concerned eyes and pouting mouth.  She reaches a hand over his, her nails grazing his skin lightly.

“
What are you talking about
?
” he smiles, taking her hand but returning his attention to his eloquent plate as if truly fascinated by its design.
“
What i
s‘
praying manti
s’
?  You said i
t…
earlier, remember
?
”

“
When
?
”
              She sighs and releases his hand.  Her lips wobble and then form a firm smile.  She draws her Chardonnay into her grasp and holds the stem but does not drink.
 “
You know when
.
”
              He bites into the sliver, letting it melt on his tongue without tasting it, and blinks up at her.  He laughs and cuts another tiny bite.
 “
Yea
h…
I know.  U
h…
i
t’
s a little embarrassing
.
”
“
Tell me
!
” she smiles, suddenly riveted.  She leans towards him and runs the tip of her toe up and down his calf. 

“
I do
n’
t-u
h
…
”
he looks from side to side before leaning towards her, chewing thoughtfully
,“
I was watching a show, a documentary on insects earlier.  Before I went to your place.  And uh, I do
n’
t kno
w…
I just had a hard time getting my mind out of it, I guess
.
”

              Her smile hardens.  Her eyes flash.  He knows as soon as he finishes the lie that she would not believe it.  God, I am the shittiest actor that ever fucking lived, he thinks, shaking his head and laughing.

“
A documentary.  You were distracted by a documentary
.
”
“
Yea
h…
I know.  Sounds awful,
I’
m sorry.  I
t’
s really embarrassing.  I just-have had a lot of things on my mind.  My focus is all over the place.  I
t’
s just that, tha
t’
s all.  I have
n’
t got the focus I need. 
I’
m sorry, i
t’
s fucked up, I know
.
” Much better, that sh
e’
ll buy for sure.

              She tilts her head and he studies her.  The tilt.  When people listen, they tilt their heads just like this.  How many times had he seen her do this move?  In interviews, in her shit movies, at the parties they went to, whenever she talked to someone who might be
someone
.  Whenever he spoke about anything heavier than fashion or magazines.  Whenever they watched a foreign film together that he knew she did
n’
t understand. She would sit through the entire two hours with her head cocked to one side, her eyes unnaturally wide, her lips slightly parted as if she were about to discover something truly fascinating and, when it was over, she would look at him in feigned awe and say how it wa
s‘
amazing
.
’ 

“
Oh, honey! 
I’
m sorry
!
” she says, grabbing his hand again.
 “
My poor baby, I know how hard this is for you. Yo
u’
re so amazing, though.  I do
n’
t know why yo
u’
re worried
.
”
“
Worried? 
I’
m no
t
…” he does
n’
t finish the sentence and frowns down at the next micro course the waiter places before them.

“
I
t’
snatural, babe.  Everybody gets a little freaked out, I think.  You do
n’
t have to explain it to me.  I know yo
u’
re stressed out.  I can tell.  Toda
y…
yo
u’
ve never been so aggressive
,
” she says after the waiter has left.

              He pokes at the tiny quail, remembering a story Alice told him about a half chicken and an internetdate
.‘
We went to this fancy ass restaurant.  I was so excited because
I’
d never been anywhere fancier than like, Applebe
e’
s.   And I ordered the half chicken, thinking it would be like, a wing and a leg or something because tha
t’
s like, half a chicken, right?  But when it came, it was literally sliced in a half, right down the middle of the chicken and it looked like a fetus to me!  I could
n’
t eat it.  And the whole time, my date kept talking about how he wanted to settle down and spawn (he actually said the wor
d‘
spawn
!’
) and all I could picture was these little half chicken, frog babies running around
!’
.

“
Hon?  Did you hear me
?
”
“
What?  Uh, yeah. 
I’
m sorry.  What did you say
?
”
              Her brow furrows and she tightens her grip.
 “
You were smiling right no
w…
I thought maybe it was about what I sai
d…
what were you thinking about
?
”
“
I do
n’
t reall
y…
I ca
n’
t eat this,
I’
m still really full from earlier
,
” he says, pushing the plate away
,“I’
m sorry, what did you say
?
”
“
I said
,‘
I did
n’
t know what to think after today
.
’
 
My ass is still really sore
,
” she whispers in a giggle.

              He smiles and squeezes her hand.
 “
Was it too much for you
?
”
“
N
o…
not at all.  I liked it
,
” she says with another tilt.
 “
It just caught me by surprise.  I never thought you were the type
.
”
“
What type
?
”
“
You kno
w…
the aggressive type.  Yo
u’
re always s
o
…”
“
‘
S
o
’ what
?
”
              She smiles and runs a hand over her dangling curl, batting her eyes seductively.
 “
Romantic.  Tender
.
”
              Her foot runs up his leg again, higher, arching around his calf and pulling him towards her. His eyes narrow suspiciously, recalling the night they met.
 “
Really?  What about the first time
?
”
              She giggles and fingers the stem of her wine glass.  Everything about her is timed perfectly, down to the twist of her lips around her scripted words.
 “
Well, ther
e’
s never a time like th
e‘
first time
.
’”