Forbidden Forever (6 page)

Chance wraps his arms
tighter around me and takes a deep breath. "I know it is a
difficult situation for you and I will give you all the time you need
to decide what you want to do," he explains. He proceeds to tell
me about his condo on the beach that he just purchased. Just as he is
reaching behind my butt, he slides his hand into his pocket and pulls
out a key on a heart-shaped key ring with the words Tiffany and Co.
on it, and places it in my hand. My very first piece of Tiffany
anything.

"Let's do this. Get
to know me away from here and then I will prove to you that we belong
together, that I can be a great stepdad to Callie and Kaleb, and we
can stop being miserable apart. I want to show you how much I care
for you and treat you the way you should be treated. Remind you every
day how amazing you are and how beautiful you are. I want you to see
the beauty I see every day when you look into the mirror, to always
know how perfect you are. Also, I told Catherine, my wife, I want a
divorce and we are both on the same side so there are no hard
feelings. She wanted it as much as I did; she just didn't want to be
the one who ended it. People in our lives have worked very hard to
try and keep us together. It is only you, Laney. I only want you."

He only wants me?
Ha! I am married to a man who never wants me, yet
sitting here on the lap of the man who just left his wife because he
only wants me. I would be completely insane to go back home to that
man who belittles me every day and not give this wonderful man next
to me a chance to make me feel wanted.
Cherished!
I smile and grab his face in between both hands and press my lips to
his with more passion than I knew I had in me. He gently strokes my
neck and with that extremely sexy wicked grin, says, "So is that
a yes?"

"
Yes.
Yes, I
will spend more time with you away from the office." The lies
are going to make things difficult for me, but at this moment all I
can think of is the feelings burning through me for this man who
actually wants me for me.

Callie and I have a
mother/daughter day planned with a full day of activities. I love
this time of year when the weather is just right and the humidity is
gone. Fall in Florida is the best time of year because it is still
warm and everything around you is changing colors. The ocean breeze
is so inviting that you can spend the whole day down at the beach and
not get too hot. If we could just set up a hammock out there it would
be perfect. First stop on our list for the day is coffee. We can't go
a day without the feeling of pure heaven soothing out pipes. Heck, we
aren't even human until our first cup. Like mother, like daughter!

Our favorite place to
get coffee is BeachHouse Beanery on A1A for the best company, view,
and aroma. So we get our coffee and rum cake, then go sit outside to
enjoy our morning view on the horizon. Relaxing in our deck chairs,
Callie talks about her week at school and how annoying her teacher,
Ms. Monroe, has been all week. The lady needs to get a grip. My
impression of her is that she is an old, lonely shrew of a woman who
needs to teach instead of harass students. Callie is an awesome
student and has enrolled in college classes so she can get her AA
before she graduates. I always pictured her being a doctor since I
have so much experience in that field, but I think she is leaning
toward something more up her alley. She hasn't quite made up her
mind, but she has some time still to decide. "Mom, I met a boy
that I really like. His name is Blake. I would like him to come over
for dinner and meet you and Dad. Do you think Dad would be okay with
it?"

"In all honesty,
Callie, I don't know what your dad is okay with, but I'm sure you can
bring it up to him and see what he says. I would be delighted to meet
him either way. Maybe we could go to dinner if your dad isn't in the
mood for company."

"Sounds great,
Mom," Callie says.

We clean up our mess and
get in the car to drive to the Princess Place for the Creekside
Festival they have every year around this time. It is set on a
beautiful preserve with a canopy of Live Oak trees. The festival is
full of arts, crafts, and food. Bluegrass, country, and folk music
fill the air as we grab a blanket from the trunk of the car and go
find a seat on the grass in front of the Princess house. The band
plays and we lie back on the blanket and watch the clouds. Reminds me
of the days when she was younger and we used to lay outside and find
clouds that created a shape in the sky. Moments like those you put in
a box inside your heart to bring a smile to your face on the days
when you don't think you can smile.

I have had several days
like that and I cherish every moment I have with this amazing young
lady who I am lucky enough to call my daughter. Some people only wish
they could have a relationship as strong as Callie and I. Kaleb and
her give me hope every day that I have to live with that asshole and
every day I live feeling like I am nothing. When I look at her, I see
more in myself than a fat piece of lard; I see a mother who has
raised an amazing daughter. Next stop on our list is the beach.
Callie is a fish with legs and would live in the water if her skin
wouldn't get weak and wrinkle after prolonged periods in it. I am
more of a land girl and love relaxing on the sand, reading a good
book. Callie spots one of her friends, April, from school, so she
heads down to the water with her.

I kick back in my lawn
chair with my latest book,
The Perfect Game
. This story has me
really wanting to rip the guy Jack's head off. I know I will somehow
love him in the end, but if it doesn't happen soon, I might slam my
Nook to pieces. Yeah, so I think I am Wonder Woman even when it comes
to being pissed at a book boyfriend. Whatever. In my head I can be
whatever I want to be, and today this Wonder Woman is going to kick
some Jack Carter ass. More people are hanging out with Callie in the
water, a few more girls and now I see a couple guys. She runs and
hugs one of them who I am assuming is Blake. She notices me looking
and waves her hand as if to say, "Stop it, Mom. You are such a
creeper." Creeper, Ha! Wait until she is a mom. I bet she will
be way worse than me. Besides, all I did was glance up and she
happened to catch me looking at that moment. Maybe she shouldn't be
so worried about me watching her and her new boyfriend, and just
introduce us already.

I get back into my book
and just as I thought I would, I fall in love with that fucking Jack
Carter. Next thing you know, I will be wearing baseball shirts and
calling myself Kitten. It could be worse. I could be an old hag who
couldn't fall in love over and over with so many fictional characters
because I am too broken to be fixed. I mean I am completely and
totally in love with Edward, Christian, Kellan, and now Jack. I see
it like this: I get to live in a fantasy world where I am the girl
lead and the guy is my ideal man. When you live with a man of many
moods, zoning off somewhere other than reality is better than
reality. I love that Callie is so independent in her life and knows
what she wants. She is so confident and her spirit radiates all
around her. It is mesmerizing, and to think I created that.

Out of the corner of my
eye, I see her and the young man who I assume to be Blake walking in
my direction. As they get closer, I set my Nook down in my lap and
notice he is a well-groomed and handsome boy. I just hope his manners
are up to par. Callie holds out her hand to him and explains, "Mom,
this is Blake...Blake this is my mom, Laney."

I can tell he is quite
nervous meeting a parent for the first time. Possibly, the first time
he had ever actually met a parent at all. I speak softly so I don't
freak him out anymore.

"Hi, Blake. It is
very nice to meet you."

Callie then adds, "Hey,
Mom, would it be okay if Blake had dinner with us tonight? I know it
is mother/daughter day but..." I cut her off abruptly.

"Callie, honey, it
would be wonderful if Blake would join us. It gives me a chance to
get to know him."

Smiling, she says,
"Thanks, Mom. You're the best!" She takes his hand to head
back to the water. A couple more hours pass and I am finally through
with my book. Wow, I hate that feeling of emptiness I feel after I
finish a book. Dinner time has finally arrived and I am starving. We
choose the Golden Lion Cafe because of its laid backed theme and
amazing food. I get Sharon's nachos with extra jalapeños
because I am in for something spicy that isn't my boss at the moment.
Callie and Blake share buffalo chicken wings and Asian pot stickers.
We choose a picnic table on the top deck so we can get a great view
of the sunset. Your day isn't completely perfect until you see one of
those and have a voodoo Kool-Aid.

Blake talks about his
family and he seems to be a very well brought up young man. I am
happy Callie has finally stepped into the dating world; I was
beginning to wonder if she ever would. She is always happy, but I
love the twinkle in her eye she gets when she talks to him. This gets
me thinking about Chance and the way he makes me feel, and about
Michael and the way I used to feel when I was with him. I remember
before we got married Michael would tell me I was beautiful, and
things seemed to be so right. Who would have known a change in size
would mean a change of heart. Chance doesn't even seem to notice my
weight or that I am disgusting to look at. He must be wearing his
beer goggles, and this is something I should probably bring up to him
if we ever did decide to be together.

We drop Blake off at his
house, which is a picture perfect white two-story house with a white
picket fence. Callie is grinning from ear to ear and it makes me
laugh. "What?" she says in a louder tone.

"Honey, you are so
cute. I think he is a great boy and I love that he makes you smile,"
I say back to her.

"Aww, Mom."
Callie, still grinning from ear to ear, blushes.

We get to our house and
go inside, both dying for a shower. I win the shower war since I am
the older one. Callie goes to talk to Michael about meeting Blake
tomorrow night and I head to the bathroom for a cool shower. It has
been a great day and I am not ready for it to be over. Sometimes
being at home is somewhat like work for me; always worried about what
I look like, even though I don't know why I care so much because it
is never enough anyway. I get out and put lotion on my sun kissed
skin and put on my pajamas. Standing in front of the mirror, I see
me: the adulterer, the mistress, the mom, wife, and a daughter.

I put my hands to the
side and see the stomach and thighs that are my biggest problem, I
think about how Chance sees me and what to make of it. He thinks I am
beautiful; sure my face isn't half bad, but the rest is, well, a big
blob. Callie laughs and I come out of my pathetic thoughts to go see
what is going on. Michael and Callie are playing some fighting game
on the x-box and from the looks of it, Callie is winning by a long
shot. Kaleb is in his own world listening to his iPod through his
headphones. I tell them all goodnight and head to bed.

It is the night of our
big proposal. A black tie event and I will be going stag since
Michael is an uncaring ass unless it involves his company or his
family. I couldn't care fucking less because it's not him I want next
to me anyway. I spend the afternoon at the salon, freshening up my
already highlighted brown hair and getting everything waxed in all
the right places. A girl never knows when an opportunity might
present itself for someone on one time with a hot doctor. I smile to
myself. I put on my new basic black dress that is a little sexier
than I would normally wear, with a slit up the side showing my thigh,
and a low cut top for an ample cleavage show. A big jewel in the
front clinching at my waist shows off my curves in all the right
places. Adding some flare to my simple dress, I slip on my platform
peep toe black with a red corset lace up back heels. I feel sexy.

I grab my black lace
cover up and silver clutch and walk into the living room. Michael's
eyes look in my direction and back to the TV as I let him know I am
leaving. Callie comes out from the kitchen and she gushes about how
beautiful I look and I unknowingly look at Michael hoping for
something. But why would he say anything nice when I know his true
feelings? I certainly don't want to hear those this evening. I feel
too good about myself for once so I'd like him to just keep his
opinions to himself. "Thank you, Callie," I express.

Kaleb is already out for
the evening and I am praying that he isn't breaking anything else. I
tell Callie I will see her when I get home. "I love you more!"
I tell her.

Once I arrive at the
banquet hall, I find Sierra and we quickly sit at a table. She looks
as amazing as ever, in an all-white dress that fits every inch
perfectly. She has her hair pulled up, which shows off her long neck.
A sexy young waiter offers us champagne and Sierra's cougar inside
starts to come out quite quickly. First, she winks with a sly smile
and then she bats her eyes like a silly school girl; before you know
it, he is offering out his hand for her to follow him off to some
back room for who knows what. Now I am sitting here all alone,
waiting for something interesting to happen. People are on stage
giving speeches from all different departments of the hospital. I am
less than interested since I have nothing to do with any of them
except the Heart Center.