Finding My Way (12 page)

“I love it!” I
replied.  And I genuinely did.

“Well thank you for
the invite Anna,” Erin said to my mother, “I better get back to unpacking.
 I never want to move again, it’s such a nightmare!”  She
laughed.  Erin has such a beautiful laugh.

“I don’t envy you,”
said Mum. “I’ll bring Katherine back to you when the party finishes.”

“Thanks again. 
You have fun girls.  Happy Birthday Emma,” Erin said as she turned to
leave.

Mum shut the door and
went back to the kitchen to continue organising the party food.  Katherine
and I stood in the entrance hall not knowing what to say to each other.

“How about you put on
some music?” Mum suggested from the kitchen.

As I turned towards
the lounge room Katherine grabbed my arm.

“I am sorry that my
Mum forced me on you, it’s
so
embarrassing!” she whispered to me.

“I think my Mum was
as much to blame,” I whispered back.

“Mums!” she laughed,
“Who’d have them!”

“Yeah!”
I laughed back, as we moved into the lounge room.

“And look what she
made me wear.  She has no clue!” Katherine said as she pulled the sides of
her dress out and did a curtsy.  “I wanted to wear jeans but she insisted
that I wear this!”  She pulled a face of disgust then laughed again and I
joined in.  I thought, “Oh thank god!  Maybe she is not such a
princess after all!”

“Yeah it is a bit
over the top!” I said and she looked totally offended by my comment and sad
too.  “Sorry… Katherine I…”

Her sad face slowly
slipped into a smile then and I realised that she was just kidding.

“Please call me Kat,
only my parents call me Katherine and usually only when I am in trouble,” she
said still grinning at me.

“Call me
Em
,” I replied, I always wanted to be called that, “because
nobody ever does.”

We both giggled again
and just like that the ice was broken and a friendship begun.  And I
honestly cannot imagine my life without her.

***

I flop on the couch
and flick on the TV.  But there is crap all on.  I flick from channel
to channel for a few minutes before I turn it off.  I have a pile of new
books to read at the moment.  I have a habit of stalking my favourite
authors online and reading whatever they recommend.  Whether I download
the eBook or buy it from the book store, if they recommend a book, I buy
it.  I am an avid reader and always have books waiting in the wings to be
read.  But I am re-reading a favourite at the moment.  I am glad
there is nothing worth watching on TV, I would prefer to read anyway.

I brush my teeth,
turn off the kitchen light and I climb into bed.  I reach for my
book.  I have trouble getting comfortable, thoughts of Seth on my
mind.  God this bed is uncomfortable!  I cannot relax.  I was
better on the couch.  Bugger this!  I grab my doona, pillow and book
and head back to the couch.  Within moments, I’m comfy and in a whole new
world, stuck in my book, a story of tattooed bad boys and sex, just what I
need.

I notice that she’s
standing further away today, trying to act all coy.  She must be shy, but
isn’t it the shy ones you’re supposed to look out for?  Maybe that’s why
she intrigues me so much.  I couldn’t imagine
Em
ever acting like those tarts at the club the other night.  Then again, if
she’s shy and doesn’t want people to notice her she shouldn’t be wearing such a
tight fitting red dress.  She looks smoking hot!  Does she think that
I don’t see her looking my way?  I give her a smile and motion for her to
come over.

“Hi Nick,” she says
sweetly when she gets over to me.

“Hi
Em
,” I say, but she is looking a little pale today, I want
to see that blush.  “So that space in my bed is still free...”

“Get stuffed!” 
Mission accomplished, her cheeks are pink again as she storms off.

“So
easily riled up!
  I’m just kidding!  I just want to make you
smile.  Your smile brightens my day!”  I yell after her. 
Unfortunately, she doesn’t smile though.

“Whatever,” she says
as she turns to glare at me once.  She gets on the train and refuses to
look my way again.

I shake my head to clear
it and focus on the next customer at my booth.

Maybe I should play a
bit nicer when I see her next.

I walked cautiously
around the corner at the train station, not sure if I wanted to face Nick this
morning.  I waited for the train a little further away from the kiosk than
I normally would.  I tried to inconspicuously peek in his direction. 
But of course I wasn’t as discreet as I hoped and he spotted me straight
away.  I hesitated for a moment, when he motioned me over to his
booth,
I just knew that he was going to embarrass me again
in some way.  But after yesterday’s effort I figured there is no point in
trying to fight it, so I walked over to him. 
Big mistake! 

I’m still fuming at
his comments when the train finally arrives.  I don’t look back in his
direction again.  I couldn’t handle the mischievous grin I just knew would
be on his handsome face.

When I left this
morning Kevin was still in bed.  He is usually out the door before
me.  Not sure what that was about, maybe he’s sick.  Hopefully he
will be home tonight, I am starting to feel like he is avoiding me and I want
to know what’s going on.

It has been so busy
today at work.  I didn’t even go to lunch when Pete asked me, I just ate
an apple and a couple of biscuits from the kitchen.  All day I have tried
and failed to get a hold of Emma.  I feel so relieved to finally see her
at the elevator when I finish for the day.

She looks so
fantastic in the red dress she has on, it hugs her curves in such a way that I
think she may notice my bulging eyes so I have to look away momentarily.  

When we enter the
elevator, I’m glad that we are finally alone.  I take the opportunity to
get a good look at her in the door reflection again.  Her shiny brown hair
curls tantalizingly just at the base of her perfectly sized breasts.  My
eyes make their way up to her flawlessly glossed lips and I gulp at the thought
of kissing them.  When my eyes lock onto her perfect emerald ones and she
flashes me one of her heart-pounding smiles, I again feel that pull to her, I
don’t understand it, but I know that I like it.  I figure now is my
chance.

I have heard Seth’s
voice a couple of times today; so I know he’s here, he must have got into work
before me.  But I have been stuck at my desk all morning and I still
haven’t seen him.  It is killing me, I’m convinced that he wanted to say
something to me yesterday and I really want to know what.

By lunchtime, I have
had enough waiting for him to come to me so I decide to visit him in his
office.  I don’t think I have been in that office since Bob left.  It
hasn’t changed at all and unfortunately it’s empty.  I start to wander
around the office looking for him and then think better of it.  Whatever
he wanted to say must not have been that important or else he would have come
to see me already.  I’m probably reading too much into this.  And me,
chasing him around the office is just going to make me look foolish!  So I
go back to my desk and eat my lunch.

Julia hands me a
mountain of files from her office for sorting and filing and it keeps me busy
all afternoon.  Five o’clock comes around again and I still haven’t seen
Seth.  I pack up my things and call out goodbye to Julia.

As I’m waiting for
the elevator, Seth walks up beside me. 
Finally
.

“Hey
Seth, busy day?”
I ask turning to look at him.

“I’ve been flat out
today.  How about you?” he says quickly glancing at me.

“Yeah, I’ve been
pretty busy.”  The elevator doors open and we step in.  I press the
ground floor button and I can’t help but stare at his hands as I notice that he
presses the basement one.  I notice him looking at me in the reflection
again and it sends a shockwave through my system.  The way that he looks
at me, it makes me feel… so exposed.

“So,” he says, our
eyes still locked in the reflection.  I wait but he doesn’t say anything
else.

“So,” I say back as
we continue to stare and then my eyes falter again.

He turns to me and I
find his eyes are even more intense to look at when they are not a
reflection.  “Your friend’s wedding, is it this weekend?”
 
Back to the wedding again?
 
What is he getting at?

“Um
no, next weekend.”
  Hesitantly I add, “Why?”

“Well… I was
wondering if you would like to um, maybe go out on a date with me. 
Dinner, Saturday night?”
 
Squeal.

The elevator stops on
the ground floor and the doors open. 

“Yes!” I say way too
eagerly as I head out of the doors.  It is then that I remember he pressed
the basement button and he’s not following me, I quickly turn as the doors are
about to close, and I see his humungous smile.  Wow!  He truly
is breathtaking.

“I’ll see you
tomorrow!” he says hurriedly leaning towards me as the doors close, and then
he’s gone.

Ahh
! 
I feel like skipping the whole way to the train station!  He asked me
out!  He asked me out!  All this time he kept asking about the
wedding, he was trying to ascertain if I was free!  Not making idle
chit-chat at all!

By the time I reach
my car my cheeks are already beginning to ache from my big foolish grin. 
I finally did it and she said yes!

Of course, Kevin
isn’t home when I get
there,
perhaps he wasn’t sick
this morning after all.  Of course, Max is in his usual spot.  My
mobile rings as soon as I enter my room.

“Hello Mum.”

“Hello
Seth, darling.
 
Just a quick call.
 
Your Dad has decided that he wants to leave at lunchtime tomorrow, to beat all
the traffic.  So we are both leaving work early, and I was wondering if
you could come by earlier, maybe even pick
Tahlia
up
from school, if you can swing it.  You know she can’t really be home on
her own, even if it’s only for a couple of hours.  What do you think?”

“What?  I
thought you were going away next weekend.”

“No darling, it’s
this weekend.”

“Shit.”

“You can still do it
can’t you?”  Mum and Dad were going away to Lorne with some friends for
the weekend and I agreed to look after my sister.  I automatically think
of Emma. 
Shit!

“Yes Mum, of
course.”  How could I say no?  They’ve both been looking forward to
the weekend for so long.  It’s something that they never do.  “I can
pick her up from school too, I’m sure it won’t be a problem.”

“Okay thanks
darling.  I’ll let
Tahlia
know to look out for
you when school lets out.  Well our dinner’s ready so I’ve
gotta
go.”

“Okay Mum, I hope you
and Dad have a great weekend.”

“Thanks, Seth. 
I’ll speak to you soon.  Bye.”

“Bye.”

How did I manage to
forget about that?  Mum asked me ages ago, I put it in my calendar on my
phone and all.  I finally had the nerve, took the chance, to ask Emma out
and now I have to cancel?  How am I going to do that?  If only I had
her phone number, then at least I wouldn’t have to do it to her face.  Oh
I am such a chicken-shit!

I make a toasted
sandwich for dinner and watch TV in my room.  At least spending the
weekend at Mum and Dad’s will be better than being holed up in this room. 
I flick through the channels, though my mind isn’t on whatever it is that I’m
watching at all.  I can’t stop thinking about Emma.

I don’t want to leave
talking to her until tomorrow, so I log into work’s computer system from my
laptop and look up the personnel files to find her phone number.  She only
has a mobile listed so I add it to my phone contacts.

I spend the next
fifteen minutes rehearsing what to say.  Something’s come up? 
Too vague.
  I have to go out of town, it’s a family
emergency?  I am not a liar.  But, sorry I have to babysit? 
Uh!  It seems so lame.

I am so excited about
going out with Seth that I don’t even remember how I got home!  Somehow, I
managed to shower and eat dinner, and in a daze I as I get ready for bed I get
a text from Kat.

Kat: 
So
anything new with you?

Me:  
Yep. 
I have a DATE!

My phone rings
immediately.  It’s Kat, as I knew it would be.

“Who?
 
What?  Where? 
When?” she asks excitedly.

“Hi
Kat!”
  I laugh.  “His name is Seth.  He’s from work.”

“What’s he
like?  He must be a bit of alright if you agreed?”

“Yes,” I grin nodding
enthusiastically, though I know she can’t see me.  “He seems nice.  I
haven’t spoken to him all that much.  But I feel this
connection
with him… I can’t describe it!”

“A
connection?
  Tell me more!”

“Well I dunno… he’s
hot for one thing!”

“Go on!” she urges.

“He has this effect
on me.  I just know that I want to get to know him.”

“Oh I get it, you
want to get to
know
him,
know
him!”

“Kat!”