Finding Dr. Right (Contemporary Medical Romance) (11 page)

A pit opened in Catherine’s stomach and filled with a blast of cold air. She fought back the panic, swallowed, took a deep breath. “What do you mean, he left? Left how?”

“With Mr. Conners.”

“When?”

“Five minutes ago. He looked upset. From, well, you know.”

“Oh, God.” Catherine took another deep breath, ran her fingers through her hair and squeezed her head between her hands, turning in a small circle while a hundred thoughts swamped her. “Not this. No more. I can’t handle this.”

“Catherine, what is it?”

She turned at the sound of Brian’s voice and reached out for him. “Matty left with Nathan.”

“What?” Brian looked at her then turned to face Steve. He shifted under their combined stares, finally shrugging.

“Matty was upset and asked Nathan to take him home.”

Catherine tried to reduce her near-hysteria to inconsequential worry, telling herself that Matty was safe with Nathan. But why would he leave without telling her? She took a deep breath, then another, and briefly considered which one she wanted to yell at first before deciding that neither of them deserved it. The whole thing was her fault. She should have seen how upset Matty was. She shouldn’t have overreacted — to Matty’s broken arm, to Brian. To everything.

Catherine turned to Brian, ready to ask him for a ride home when he pulled the car keys from his pocket and motioned for her to follow him.

“Mom’s going to be angry at you for doing this, won’t she?”

Nathan took his eyes from the road to glance at the boy sitting next to him. He then turned his attention back to the traffic.
Angry
was an understatement. Nathan just shrugged and offered Matty a carefree smile. “No big deal.”

“I shouldn’t have asked you.” Matty’s miserable whisper hit Nathan straight in the chest, unleashing an emotion he had no business feeling. It was one thing to be pals or to joke around, but another thing altogether to start feeling so protective.

“Hey, kiddo, don’t sweat it. It’ll work out.” Nathan tried to make his voice light and winced at how flat the words sounded. Matty sighed and leaned his head against the passenger window, visibly worried. “Besides, I think she’s already mad at me. This won’t make any difference.”

“Why is she mad at you?”

“I have no idea.” It wasn’t a complete lie. Nathan knew Catherine well enough to figure out that she was suffering from some serious guilt about Matty’s broken arm. What he didn’t know was how much of her guilt would turn into regret, and if she would blame him or just herself.

A soft moan caught Nathan’s attention and he turned to look at Matty, noticed the way he was cradling the broken arm against his stomach. He called himself a fool for not realizing sooner that Matty would be in pain. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” Matty swallowed then nodded. “It’s just a little uncomfortable is all.”

Uncomfortable hell, Nathan thought. Judging from his pale and sweaty face, the arm was a lot more than just uncomfortable. Nathan pursed his lips then eased the car into the turn lane.

“Hey, Matty, how about going to my place? It’s closer and you could lie down for a bit until your mom picks you up.”

“Okay.” Matty was unusually quiet. Nathan looked over and noticed the pained look on his face. The protectiveness he felt earlier grew, and Nathan’s anxiety grew right along with it.

He needed his head examined.

Matty had fallen into a restless sleep by the time Nathan pulled into the parking lot of his complex. He let out a sigh and waited, watching the slow rise and fall of Matty’s chest.

“Perfect. Now what?” Nathan leaned over and gently pushed on Matty’s leg. Still nothing. He shook his head, got out of the car and went around to the other side, slowly opening the passenger door so Matty wouldn’t fall out. He bent down and scooped the sleeping kid into his arms, wincing at the pull in his knee. Matty stirred, looked at him through half-closed eyes.

“Nathan?”

“Shh, kiddo. Go back to sleep.” A knot formed in Nathan’s stomach when Matty wrapped his good arm around his neck and rested his head on his shoulder. Nathan kicked the car door closed, careful not to jostle Matty as he walked.

The first thing he was going to do when he made it inside was get Matty comfortable. The second was going to be a phone call to Catherine to let her know where Matty was. And the third…

Well, the third was going to be another phone call, this one to a shrink because there was no doubt in Nathan’s mind that he needed his head checked.

B
zzz.
B
zzz.

“Go away.” The sleepy mumble tumbled from Nathan’s mouth as he rolled over and tried to get comfortable.

Bzzz.
Pause.
Bzzz. Bang. Bang. Bang.

Nathan groaned, wondered what the irritating noise was, wondered why his bed suddenly seemed so much smaller and harder.

Bang. Bang.

The loud noise dragged Nathan from the gray depths of hazy sleep. He opened his eyes, squinting at the surroundings that were barely more than shadows in the dim light, and realized he had fallen asleep on the sofa. The banging was more insistent this time, and he wondered why someone was trying to beat his door down. Memory swam to the surface of his mind as he sat up.

Matty and his broken arm. Bringing him here.

Catherine.

The reason for the banging noise was suddenly clear. Nathan stumbled to the door, looking at his watch and groaning at how much time had passed since he brought Matty here.

“Oh, hell.” His hand closed around the cold knob, twisted and pulled just as Catherine raised her hand to knock again. She lost her balance and stumbled as the momentum carried her forward. Nathan reached out to steady her.

“Where’s Matty?”

“He’s sleeping…” Nathan’s voice trailed off as Catherine pushed by him, squinting her eyes in the darkness. Nathan reached over and flipped the wall switch; soft light from two end lamps chased the shadows back to the corners. He was about to close the door then stumbled back when Brian walked in.

“Where?”

“Where what? Oh, Matty.” Nathan rubbed his hands over his face then straight back through his hair, grimacing at the dryness in his mouth. He couldn’t remember the last time he had fallen asleep in the middle of the day. “He’s in my room.”

Catherine turned and walked through the living room to the short hallway, peeked through the open door with an audible sigh of relief. She looked back at Nathan with an unreadable expression before walking in, leaving him and Brian alone.

Nathan shook his head and walked to the kitchen, desperate for something cold to drink to wake him up.

“You shouldn’t have left the hospital with Matty.”

Nathan turned to see that Brian had followed him into the kitchen. He opened the refrigerator door, studying the shelves for a full minute before grabbing a carton of milk. “He was upset and asked to leave. What was I supposed to do?”

“Well, you could have told his mother for starters.”

Nathan gave Brian a look that left no room for doubt about his thoughts on that idea. He brought the open carton to his nose, sniffed, then frowned at the sour smell and put it back.

“Or you could have taken him to his own house.”

He ignored Brian, letting him have his own one-way conversation as he continued his search for something to drink.

“Dammit, the least you could have done was call Catherine and let her know.”

“I did. There was no answer so I left a message. Twice. And then I paged her. Still no answer.” Nathan pulled the pitcher of water from the door of the refrigerator and grabbed a clean glass from a cabinet. He poured a glass and drained it in one long swallow, refilled it and drank again.

“Oh.” Brian shifted his weight from one foot to the other then leaned against the counter and studied Nathan. “I guess she forgot her pager.”

“Guess so.” Nathan drained his third glass of water and placed the near-empty pitcher in the sink, ready to refill the reservoir so the water could be filtered.

“So. Is Matty okay? Is his arm —”

“His arm hurts like hell but he’s afraid to admit it because of his mom.” A concern that Nathan completely understood, especially after seeing how protective — how overly cautious — Catherine was when it came to Matty. “Other than that, he’s fine. He took one of the pills they left out for him at the hospital not long after we got here, and he’s been sleeping ever since. And I even made sure to put ice on his arm.”

“I see.” There was a short pause, filled only by the sound of running water. Brian cleared his throat and Nathan prepared himself for the next barrage of questions and comments. “You, um, don’t seem too happy. I didn’t think having Matty for such a short time would have been such a big inconvenience.”

“Oh, for crissakes. I don’t believe this.” Nathan slammed the faucet off then turned and fixed Brian with a harsh glare. “Matty is not an inconvenience. Far from it. He’s probably the most easygoing kid I’ve ever met and…and why am I even explaining this to you?”

“I see.”

“Somehow I doubt that.” Nathan leaned against the counter and crossed his arms tightly in front of him, staring at a spot on the floor as a still quiet permeated the room.

“Oh, I don’t know. My guess is that Matty got to you.”

Nathan looked up in time to see a small grin lift the corner of the doctor’s mouth. He shook his head and grunted, not sure how to respond, not sure if a response was even necessary. Saying that the kid got to him was one of the biggest understatements Nathan had heard in a long time.

Matty
had
gotten to him, in ways he didn’t want to think about. His strength and positive outlook was a contradiction to everything the poor kid had been through.
Poor kid.
The words echoed through Nathan’s mind. Matty could never be described as a “poor kid.” If anything, he could set a positive example for many adults Nathan knew.

“They’re a package deal, you know.”

Nathan grunted again and looked up, not surprised to see Brian studying him with a carefully blank expression. He finally met the doctor’s stare and softly gave voice to the thought that had been spinning through his mind. “Yeah, well…I don’t think Catherine’s ready for any kind of deal, if you ask me.”

Brian shrugged and casually looked around the kitchen. Nathan wondered what he was looking for but didn’t ask. He had no desire to play host, afraid that this wasn’t a social call, afraid that Catherine’s guilt and sense of responsibility would pull her away before they had a chance to start anything.

“Catherine’s been through a lot, and most of it on her own. She’s not accustomed to being with anyone. Try not to hold that against —” Brian stopped midsentence, interrupted by a muffled
beep, beep, beep.
He swore softly under his breath and pulled a small pager from his trousers pocket. He glanced at it then offered Nathan a weak smile. “The hospital. I need to go.”

Nathan watched the doctor walk out of the kitchen and he wondered where the conversation had been heading when another thought occurred to him. He pushed off the counter to follow Brian then nearly collided with him when he turned the corner.

“Nathan, I hate to ask this, but is there any way…Would you be able to take Catherine and Matty home?”

“Uh, I don’t —”

“Great, thanks.” Brian turned back around and headed for the door before Nathan caught his breath enough to protest.

“I don’t think she’d want —”

“She’ll get over it, don’t worry.” Brian tossed him a look that Nathan didn’t understand then stepped into the hallway, closing the door behind him. Silence followed, leaving Nathan stunned. He stared at the empty spot where Brian had been only a second before then released his breath through pursed lips, suddenly feeling like he had been set up. Again.

“Wonderful.” Nathan placed fisted hands on his hips and shook his head, wondering where his common sense had gone. He was still standing there a few minutes later when Catherine emerged from the bedroom, pulling the door closed behind her.

“Matty’s still sleeping….” Her voice trailed off as she came to a stop a few feet away and looked around. Nathan clenched his jaw against the frustration he felt when she avoided looking at him. “Um, where’s Brian?”

“Gone.”

“Gone?” Catherine’s face visibly paled as she finally met his eyes. The look of despair on her face unleashed a mix of emotions in Nathan that he didn’t want to examine.

“Yeah. He got a page and left.”

“Oh.” Catherine continued to stare at Nathan, obviously uncomfortable, and he recognized the morning-after regret, along with her guilt. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other, her downcast eyes focused on the floor. Nathan noticed how her hands fidgeted, nervously playing with the crease of her slacks before clenching each other. “Um, did he say when he was coming back?”

“He’s not.”

“He’s…what do you mean, he’s not?”

“Just what I said.” Nathan turned away from her, from the anxiety in her eyes and the small tremor of uncertainty that edged her nervous words. The spacious living room with its vaulted ceiling suddenly seemed small and suffocating. He took a step toward the kitchen, stopped, then made a half turn toward the hallway before realizing escape to his bedroom was also impossible. The spare room would have been an option if not for all the weight-lifting equipment and hockey gear that cluttered it, and he had no desire to lock himself up in the spare bathroom. Maybe the loft would offer some escape….

“May I borrow your phone, please?”

Nathan tensed at the cool formality in her voice. Irrational anger flared through him at her ability to smother her emotions when his own were always so close to the surface. He stopped his search for escape and stared at her. “Why?”

The question caught her off guard. Her mouth opened and closed silently as she stared at him through narrowed eyes. Nathan bit back an oath when she raised her chin a notch, a sure sign of the stubbornness that streaked through her.

“So I can call a taxi.” Her coolness lowered the temperature in the room by a few degrees.

Nathan studied her, looking for signs of the warmth he knew she possessed, and suddenly realized it was all an act. The slight trembling that shook her delicate hands was disguised by clenched fists; the sheen of moisture in her eyes was replaced by an icy glare.

Yes, it was definitely an act. From the beginning, the facade he had noticed had been erected for protection, a barrier against an outside world that wasn’t always kind. The insight jolted Nathan like contact with a live wire, hard and biting.

So what did he want to do about it? Let her continue with her barriers, or take a chance and crash through them?

The saner part of his mind told him to just let it go. To take the easy way out and point her to the phone.

“No.” The single word that fell from his mouth caught him by surprise and sent a silent groan through the part of his mind that was thinking clearly. The other part, the part that possessed entirely too much emotion for his own good, breathed a sigh of relief and gave a quiet shout of delight at the expression that crossed her face.

Again, Catherine’s mouth opened in silent protest. Nathan smothered the grin that wanted to break free at the sight of her indecision and uncertainty. He turned toward the kitchen, hoping he knew what he was doing.

“Then how do you suggest we get home?” Her voice, so close behind him, wasn’t as cool or certain as before. Nathan shrugged, then slid the pocket door of the kitchen closed and threw the small lock, effectively trapping her inside the room with him.

A flush of pleasure shot through him as Catherine sputtered her outrage. He could hear her breathing, sensed her indecision as she paced a few steps behind him. Nathan finally turned and looked at her. Her brown eyes glowed with irritation as she motioned wildly with her hands. He cocked an eyebrow in her direction and bit back a smile when she stepped closer, the flush on her face growing bright.

“What are you doing? And how are we supposed to get home?”

“Catherine, I’ll take you home. No need to worry, okay?”

Just like that, the fight and apprehension evaporated from her. She shook her head, though Nathan wasn’t sure what she was denying. Catherine stared at him for a long minute then slowly closed the small space between them. She fidgeted then swallowed audibly, not looking at him.

“Nathan, I…” The words trailed off in a choked whisper and she tried to take a step backward, only to be stopped when he folded his arms around her and pulled her closer. He tilted her chin up and searched her face, gazing into her eyes.

“Catherine, you don’t need to worry, okay? And you don’t need to feel guilty, or act like we did anything wrong.” Her eyes briefly met his, wide with uncertainty and emotion before she looked away. The body he held in his arms was stiff; he could feel a tremor pass through her as she fought to keep her distance, if not physically then at least emotionally.

“I…I don’t…” Nathan tightened his hold around her and once again tilted her head so she was forced to look at him. His breath hitched at the emotion in her eyes. He gentled his hold, glad when she didn’t pull away.

Quiet seconds stretched before he noticed the moisture filling her eyes. He held her close, ignoring the squeeze in his chest when she relaxed against him and rested her head on his shoulder.

He refused to look too closely at the comfort he felt at just holding her, of having her in his arms. There would be time for that later, he thought. For now, he just wanted to enjoy the feel of her body tucked close against his, wanted to enjoy the sensation of protection that surged through him at the trust she showed in the simple act of wrapping her arms around his waist.

“Nathan, about this morning…” Her words were muffled against his chest. The warmth of her breath seared his skin through the cotton T-shirt and Nathan’s jaw clenched at his body’s instant reaction. He shifted and gazed down at Catherine, saw the anxiety in her eyes.

“Shh. Don’t worry about it.”

“No, I have to.” She pulled away from him, looked around before facing him again. “I didn’t mean to act distant. It’s just everything with Matty…I’m sorry.”

The apology hung in the air between them and Nathan knew how hard it had been for her to offer it. She stood in front of him, watching, waiting. Seconds ticked by as they stared at each other before Nathan offered her a small smile.

“You weren’t too distant. Guilty, maybe.” Nathan hurried on when disappointment crossed her face. “But I understand, Catherine. I do.”