Authors: Piers Anthony
Tags: #Fiction, #Fantasy, #General, #Fantasy fiction, #Xanth (Imaginary place), #Xanth (Imaginary place) - Fiction
"Limited to the region where the death occurs.
That means that though a
person reconstitutes, he can never return to that spot, or ever come
close to it.
The limit is about six months on a side, From and To, and
equivalent distances north and south."
Both Forrest and Imbri were perplexed.
"But why can't a person just go
there anyway?" Imbri asked.
"He just can't.
It no longer exists for him.
He can see the limit, but
can't cross it."
"You mean it exists, only he can't go there?" Forrest asked.
"Others
can go, but not the one who died there'?"
"Yes."
They pondered that a moment.
Then Forrest had another question:
"Suppose I get killed by the ogre, so I can't go back there, but then
the ogre comes out here'?
Beyond the six month range?
Could I have at
him again?"
"Yes.
When two folk fight, and one kills the other, he has to be
careful when he leaves that area, because the other may be lurking for
him, to kill him back.
Sometimes two enemies leave a whole series of
holes in each other's existences, making things difficult.
So as a
general rule, folk try not to kill or be killed, because it's such a
nuisance."
"What about dragons or ogres?"
"That's another matter.
They are so dull that they don't worry about
such complications.
Dragons don't kill their own, and don't care about
others.
If an ogre crunches you once, he'll do it again.
It isn't easy
to talk to an ogre; they're too stupid.
I think maybe this a bad idea."
"But if we don't talk to him, we can't find out where the dear horn is,"
Forrest said.
"Then we won't be able to complete our service to you,
and you won't be able to help us find faun country."
"That is true," she agreed sadly.
Forrest pondered.
"It occurs to me that this is like one of the Good
Magician's Challenges.
We just have to figure out the way through."
"But we have no guarantee that there is a way through," Imbri said.
"This isn't a carefully crafted test.
This is real."
"Still, even real challenges often have solutions." He gazed at the
castle.
"Maybe animal psychology will help.
What is the basic nature
of ogres?"
"Everyone knows that," Cathryn said.
"They are the strongest, ugliest,
and stupidest creatures around."
He nodded.
"That's my understanding.
I hear they even have contests in
those categories.
But I also hear that they're not bad folk, when you
get to know them."
"Who would want to get to know an ogre?" Cathryn inquired.
"We would," Imbri said.
"So we can ask him where the dear horn is.
Oh, that's right; I forgot.
I don't have much memory at this age."
But Forrest was working on his notion.
"Ogres have pride, don't they?
Suppose we challenged him to an ugly contest'?"
"But we couldn't possibly win that," Cathryn said.
"None of us is even
remotely uglier than the handsomest ogre."
"So we would lose," Forrest said.
"Yes.
Instantly.
Then he would crunch us."
But Imbri was catching on.
"Would he crunch folk he had just bested,
and who admitted it?
Who maybe even praised his superior ugliness?"
Cathryn stared at her.
"What a notion!
You mean his ogre pride in
victory would make him generous?"
Forrest nodded.
"Yes.
We could rally make him proud."
Imbri remained doubtful.
"But if it doesn't work, we get crunched."
Forrest nodded.
"So I guess I'd better go 'n alone."
Both fillies reacted.
"We didn't say that," Imbri protested.
"No, we didn't," Cathryn agreed.
"But it's my idea, and there's no sense in having two or three of us get
crunched, when one will do."
The two exchanged a generous glance.
"We're not sure this is best,"
Imbri said.
"Consider it this way: if I get crunched, you will still be here to try
it, if you wish to, perhaps with more success.
If it works for me, then
I can ask the ogre to let the two of you in.
So you don't need to take
the risk either way, unless you decide to."
"I hate to say it," Cathryn said.
"But he's making sense."
"Fauns are more sensible than I thought," Imbri agreed.
"And have more courage than I thought."
"Well, we don't just chase nymphs, you know," Forrest said, embarrassed.
"Now, how can I make myself ugly?"
"Why even try?" Imbri asked.
"Just challenge him, and lose.
He won't
know the difference."
He nodded.
"I'll do it." He squared himself, and marched on toward the
castle.
"Wait!" Imbri called.
"If you get crunched, where will you
reconstitute?"
He paused.
"How far is half a year?"
Cathryn considered.
"Back about where we emerged from the comic strip."
"Then I'll t'orm there, just this side ot' it."
"All right," Imbri said.
"But be careful, Forrest."
He laughed.
"If I was careful, I wouldn't walk into an ogre's den."
He resumed his march.
The castle loomed larger and uglier as he approached it.
It was huge
and squat, with dull thatch for the roof, and mildew on the stone walls.
The big front door was well over twice his own height, made of ironwood.
He came to a stop before the door.
Entry was a daunting prospect, but
he raised one fist and knocked on the wood iron.
There was no response.
So he knocked harder.
Still nothing.
He
realized that the ogre probably couldn't hear him.
For one thing, there
was a constant rumbling or crashing from within the castle, as if
something huge and violent were bashing down walls.
He looked around and saw a big bell.
On it was printed the word
WEATHER.
Beside it was a solid metal bar.
So he picked up the ba.r,
hefted it high, and swung it at the bell-weather.
There was a loud gong, followed by a crack of thunder.
A storm cloud
formed over the bell, shooting out bolts of lightning.
The lightning
struck the bell, adding to the sound.
Then a bucket of rain dropped
from the cloud and doused the bell.
The sound faded, and the cloud
evaporated.
There was a rumbling behind the door.
Then it jerked violently inward,
so that the suction of the air blew Forrest inside.
He stumbled and
caught his footing, helped by his magic sandals.
There stood the ogre: twice the height of a man, hairy, and
disproportionately muscular.
"Who you?" the thing demanded.
"I- I'm Forrest Faun.
I come to have an ugly contest."
The ogre thought about that.
Forrest knew he was thinking, because the
unusual effort was heating his head, and huge fleas were *umping off
lest their feet get burned.
Then he decided to introduce himself. "See
me: Orgy."
So far, so good.
"I'm uglier than you."
Orgy Ogre stared down at him.
"Ugly faun?
'Tis to yawn."
"I'll prove it.
Do you have a mirror?"
Oi-gy shook his shaggy head.
"Mirror lack.
Ogre crack."
He meant th;it his I-ace was so ugly that any mirror that reflected it
broke.
This was a complication.
How could Forrest lose a contest if
they couldn't compare their faces'!
But maybe they could do it with
water.
"Do you have a pool?"
"Sure, pool.
It cool."
"Then let's compare faces in the pool.
Then we'll see who is uglier."
Orgy considered, and more fleas jumped off.
Then he decided.
"Me say
okay." He turned and led the way into the castle.
Forrest followed.
He noticed that much of the castle was in ruins. The
walls had been bashed down, and the stones were scattered across the
floor.
The ogre simply kicked them out of the way, not even noticing,
though some were pretty solid chunks.
They came to an inner courtyard where water had collected.
It was
dirty, but it would do.
Forrest bent lorward so that he could see his reflection.
He looked
just exactly like a faun.
"Ugly," he said.
Orgy Ogre bent over.
The water quivered and shrank away.
Orgy
grimaced.
The water made waves as it fled to the edges of the pool.
Orgy smiled.
The water turned muddy and splashed right out of the pool
on the far side.
"I'm impressed," Forrest said.
"I was never able to make water do that.
You are uglier than I am, by far.
You must be a legend among your