Fated (21 page)

The
cab ride to my apartment was quick, and I immediately fell into bed, feeling
mentally and physically exhausted. I relived every moment of yesterday, cringing
when I thought about how crazed I must have looked when Caden saw me attacking
his agent. Even worse, my stomach clenched when I thought about what I had
revealed to him. The last thing I wanted was for him to feel sorry for me. The
thought of Caden’s pity made me want to throw up. Especially since he had
experienced something much more horrific as a child.

I
forced myself to keep busy, trying to keep my mind off Caden, but he was all I
could think about as I ran errands. I saw his face as I watched my clothes
whirl around in the dryer at the laundromat, I thought about the lasagna he had
burned the first time we had made love while I was grocery shopping. I stopped
short at the thought. We hadn’t made love, we had engaged in strictly sex. I
needed to be careful with how I thought about our relationship.

I
was grateful when the day was finally over and I slipped between the sheets,
the wine I had drank helping to lull me into a restless sleep.

I was
aware of an annoying distant ringing trying to pull me to the surface, and I
resisted until I could no longer ignore it. I opened my eyes, dazed by being
awoken so abruptly and not knowing how long I had been asleep. I scrabbled for
the bedside table, unsure whether it was the alarm or my phone making the
noise.

I
grabbed the cell phone that Caden had given me when I finally realized it was
the source of the offending sound.

“Hello?”
I croaked out.

“Lauren.”
He said nothing more than my name. I glanced at the alarm clock.

“Caden,
it’s three o’clock in the morning. This better be an emergency.”

“I
did tell you that your job was 24/7 and that you shouldn’t be surprised by
calls in the middle of the night.”

I
sat up, realizing that this could be something work-related, and that such a
late call could mean something bad. I was instantly fully alert. “Is something
wrong?”

Caden
paused before speaking, and I was surprised he sounded so hesitant. “Not
really.”

I
sighed as I rubbed my forehead. “Then what is it?”

“I
couldn’t sleep and I…” his voice trailed off before continuing. “I wondered if
you were having the same problem.”

“Not
really. I was sleeping soundly when you called and woke me up.” I didn’t
mention that I had needed several glasses of wine to help me get past the
constant thoughts of him.

“Can
I come over?”

I
laughed at his request. “Is this a booty call?”

I
could hear the smile in his voice when he answered. “I guess. Is that bad?”

The
thought of seeing Caden was too irresistible. Why deprive myself of something
that Caden was willing to give so easily?

“Not
if I want the same thing. How fast can you be here?”

“Is
one and a half seconds too fast?”

“What?”
I was confused by his answer. “How can you be here in one and a half seconds?”

“Because
I’m downstairs,” he replied dryly.

I
was giddy when I buzzed him up, frantically trying to put my hair in some
semblance of order before he reached the apartment. I greedily drank in the
sight of him when I opened the apartment door, as if I hadn’t just seen him
earlier in the day. He was wearing jeans and a brown leather jacket over a blue
button-down shirt. His dark brown hair looked rumpled, as if he had just rolled
out of bed. I would have drooled if it wasn’t so unseemly.

“Hi,”
I said, feeling shy as I let him in. It felt different to have him here, even
though technically it wasn’t my apartment and it was filled with Macie’s
things.

Caden
didn’t bother with a greeting as he pulled me to him, kissing me thoroughly
until I was breathless.

“Hi,”
he finally said in return when he pulled back. “Long time no see.”

I
grinned as I pulled him into the living room. He stopped short of the sofa,
glancing behind me. “Isn’t there a bedroom back there somewhere?”

“Wow,
this really
is
a booty call.”

Caden
pulled me close, gripping my bottom and pushing me against him. “As long as it
ends with me sliding inside you, you can call it anything you want.”

I
felt my pulse quicken, his words moving me like nothing else could. I much
preferred his base honesty rather than sweet nothings that were meaningless.

I
grabbed his hand again to pull him to the bedroom when he winced. I glanced
down at his hand, my gaze shooting back up to his face when I saw that his
knuckles were scraped raw.

“What
happened?” I had a suspicion about why Caden’s hands were torn apart, but I
wanted to hear it for myself.

His
mouth twisted as if he expected an argument. “I couldn’t just let him walk away
with no repercussions. I let Joseph know what happens when he puts his hands on
a woman.”

I
didn’t like the emotions that sputtered to life inside of me. The insidiously
pleasurable feeling of being cared for, of being protected, was unfamiliar. I
had taken care of myself for years. I didn’t need someone to protect me now,
when I was perfectly capable of protecting myself. Still, I didn’t want Caden
to think I was unappreciative so I worded my response carefully.

“I
appreciate the sentiment behind it. I really do. But I don’t need you to go
fighting my battles for me. I think I made it pretty obvious to Joseph that
it’s a mistake to touch me.”

His
lips thinned. “I just made sure the message wasn’t missed.”

I
sighed, giving up. “How bad was it? The police aren’t going to come here
looking for you, are they?”

“That
coward wouldn’t call the police. He would have to admit that he grabbed you.
Even if he did call them, I couldn’t care less.”

I
studied Caden for a few moments and then looked down at his hands. They were
scraped pretty badly, and I could just imagine the damage he had done to
Joseph. Without thought, I lifted one of his hands and kissed the scarred
knuckles gently, surprising myself. I could tell by his harsh exhale that Caden
was just as surprised.

“Thank
you,” I said simply. “No one’s ever done anything like that for me before.”

An
unreadable expression passed over Caden’s face before he hauled me to him. I
was vaguely aware of clothes being shed as we made our way into the bedroom,
our hands sliding frantically over bared skin.

I
pushed Caden back onto the bed, crawling up his body to kiss every inch of
muscled skin. He groaned as I trailed open-mouthed kisses lower, thrilled at
the taste of his slightly salty skin. He watched me as I took hold of his
erection, never breaking our gaze as I gently licked the head, swirling my
tongue around it. His eyes burned into me as I took him into my mouth, holding
him at the base as I bobbed my head up and down.

“Christ,
Lauren,” he bit out. He reached down and wrapped my hair around his hand so
that he could see everything I was doing.

I
was intoxicated by the taste and smell of him, by his guttural groans as I
hollowed my cheeks, sucking harder as my tongue laved his steely length. I
hadn’t done this for him before. I had been surprised that I had even wanted to
do it the first time Caden and I had sex, although I had been thwarted by his
need to be inside me. The idea of a blowjob had always been sickening to me. I
had promised myself that I would never do it willingly. That I would never
choose to debase myself in this way once I was in control of my own life.

But
nothing about what I was doing right now seemed debasing. I reveled in giving
Caden pleasure, proud that I could please him with my mouth as he much as he
had pleased me with his.

I took
him as deeply as I could, trying not to choke when I felt the head hit the back
of my throat. I felt frustrated by my inability to take him deeper and tried
again, but my gag reflex refused to diminish.

“Easy,
baby,” he whispered. “Just having your lips wrapped around me feels incredible.
Don’t hurt yourself.”

His
gentle words spurred me on like nothing else could, and I determinedly took him
deeper into my throat, satisfaction coursing through me when I was able to take
him much further down, although it wasn’t even close to his full length.

“Fuck,”
he choked out as I increased the tempo, taking him deep in my throat, trying to
control my choking. The room was filled with sounds of my feverish need to give
him satisfaction and his groans of pleasure, until he finally bit out, “Lauren,
I’m going to come.”

I
ignored his warning, wanting him to come inside my mouth. He groaned long and
hard as he jerked spasmodically and I swallowed spurt after spurt until there
was nothing left. His taut body relaxed when he was spent. I looked at him as I
leaned down to lick the head of his length to make sure I hadn’t missed a drop,
loving the way his eyes darkened as he watched me.

I
giggled when he hauled me up so that I was lying on top of him, the sound
foreign to my own ears.

“Just
wait,” he warned with a grin. “As soon as I get my strength back up, you’re in
for it.”

“Promises,
promises,” I said airily as I pressed my face against his neck, breathing in deeply.
In that moment, I felt happy. Real happiness. Not just a guise of happiness
that I often put on for the world. And not even the glimpses of real humor and
delight I sometimes experienced. But true happiness, that made me realize why
people were willing to risk everything for another person.

At
the same time, I knew this feeling was fleeting. Happiness was elusive,
dissolving in your hands as soon as you caught it. Yet instead of corrupting
the emotion, it made me feel it even more strongly, knowing that the end would
make the time before it even sweeter.

Chapter Sixteen

True
to his word, I woke up Sunday morning with plenty of aches from Caden’s
vigorous retribution, although it had seemed a far cry from punishment. He was
already awake when I opened my eyes, and I was a little unnerved by his
watchful gaze. It made me blurt out the first thing on my mind.

“Why
are you watching me? It’s creepy.”

He
burst out laughing and wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me towards him.
“I’ll never have to worry about an over-inflated ego with you around.”

“Sorry,”
I said with a weak smile, aware that I had done the same thing to him the other
morning, although I would never admit to it.

“I
can think of a way that you can make it up to me.” Caden leered at me
suggestively.

“I
can barely walk as it is. Why don’t we table that activity until after
breakfast?”

He
brightened at my words. “You’re going to make breakfast?”

I
frowned at his excitement over my potential domesticity, but I decided to not
be a spoilsport by refusing to make breakfast just to make a point about it not
being a role that I was planning to fill regularly. Everything seemed easier
today. Easier to breathe, easier to not be bothered by small things, easier to
smile and really mean it.

“Pancakes
or omelets?”

“Definitely
pancakes.”

I
made a move to rise, but Caden pulled me down so that I was on my back. He
leaned over me with a mischievous smile. “But afterwards. I’m hungry for
something else right now.”

I
opened my mouth to protest, but moaned instead when he buried his head between
my thighs, devouring me as if there was nothing sweeter.

By
the time he was done, my body was bathed in sweat and I felt limp and weak. He
grinned as he kissed me. “Now it’s time for pancakes.”

I
batted his shoulder, not being able to suppress a smile. “Give me a few
minutes. I need to recover.”

“Sure,”
he said with a shrug, and then proceeded to scrape his teeth against my nipple
before sucking on it. It seemed impossible, but I felt an answering wetness
between my legs despite my fatigue.

“Not
like that!” I exclaimed, although I arched my back. I whimpered when he tugged
my hard nub between his teeth as he swept his tongue back and forth across it.
When he released it and watched me with a satisfied smirk, I used all my
strength to sit up. At this rate, we would spend all day in bed.

“Okay,
okay, I’m making pancakes now,” I grumbled as I slipped on the oversized shirt
I had discarded last night.

Caden
stretched out on the bed with one arm behind his head, looking pleased. “No
rush. I’m sure we can find other things to do in the meantime.”

I
rolled my eyes but laughed. It was amazing how lighthearted Caden could be, and
it was dangerously addicting. “I prefer not eating pancakes for dinner, so I’ll
make them now.”

Caden
offered to help as he watched me cook, but I told him it was unnecessary. I was
surprised that I actually enjoyed cooking for him, and I felt more than a
little satisfaction when he ate them with gusto.