Evan's Addiction (29 page)

     “If she did they still wouldn’t continue to bother her.” Nic
grunted, pulling her flush against him to glare down at her. “You’ll tell me
from now on and I’ll take care of them so they won’t bother her or you again.”

     “How about I just stay away from her in public? That should solve
everything.”

     The three of us started at Shaw’s voice and we turned to see her walk
into the kitchen. She had on knee length sweats, a green tank top that molded
to her sweet breasts, and her wild red hair was up in its usual beach ball bun.
My hands itched to get anywhere on her.

     “Shaw, that’s not what Nic was saying.” Carrie glared at Nic and
mouthed something to him I didn’t catch because my focus was on Shaw as she
moved around the kitchen not looking at me.

     “Yeah, Shaw, that’s not what I meant…at all.” Nic declared. “You
were there for Carrie when she went through that shit with her past. I just
want to return the favor.”

     Shaw shrugged while filling a glass with water. “I did try to tell
her she needed to keep her distance from me when I saw any of them coming but
she can be a bit stubborn. And I don’t need any favors.” Her tone had a bite at
the end and I wondered if that was because of me.

     “So you can dish out favors but we can’t return them…that’s not
very fair, is it?” Nic countered.

     “That’s life.” Shaw grabbed an apple from the refrigerator and
walked away. Not once had she looked at any of us.

      I sighed; at least she hadn’t told me to get the hell out. Her
door shut with a resounding click.    

     “Great, now she thinks you don’t want her around me.” Carrie
pulled herself from Nic’s arms and headed for Shaw’s bedroom. I set my hand to
her shoulder.

     “Carrie, let me try to talk to her first? If she let’s me then
I’ll explain.”

     She pursed her lips and after a moment nodded. “Okay, but if she
starts yelling or asks you to leave than you go. I don’t want her upset any
further. You will just have to figure out another way to talk to her.”

     I nodded in agreement even though I was going to give myself a
little bit of lee-way on that. “Thank you.” 

     Nic pulled Carrie into the living room, whispering in her ear,
probably attempting to get himself out of the dog house. Taking a deep breath I
headed down the hall. There were three doors but only one was closed. Stepping
in front of it I debated for two seconds and settled on pushing it open instead
of knocking. It was a ballsy move because it could have her screaming at me
before I even opened my mouth, but she could deny me entrance if I knocked
which would make this whole endeavor useless.  

     Shaw was standing at the window and she whipped around at my
entrance, holding a cat in her arms. “You’ve got some balls.” She declared with
a scowl.

     Giving her a sober look I closed the door behind me. “I was just
ruminating on that.”

     We stared at each other in silent assessment for a long moment. I
didn’t know what her thoughts were, but I knew mine; I hoped she believed me
when I told her I hadn’t used her for her body, and I wanted another chance
with her. 

     She was petting the cat she was holding and I used that to break
the tension. “You never mentioned having a cat.”

     “I didn’t mention a lot of things about myself, and men are
typically only interested in one type of pussy.” Her tone was almost placid as
she tossed that at me.

     My muscles tensed and I reminded myself that this was how she
protected herself. “I wanted to know more about you, Shaw, but most of the time
you evaded.”

     Her gaze flickered away and she moved to set the cat on the bed.
It curled up with its gaze on me as she stepped over to her computer turning
the screen away from me. My eyes did a quick scan of her room and the one thing
that stuck out was that it was super tidy. There didn’t seem to be anything out
of place.

     “Evan, my life wasn’t the fucking fairytale yours was so I’m sorry
I don’t feel like summoning up all my horrible memories for you to ‘auhhh’ in
pity over.” She clipped out in a tight tone.

     My jaw ticked. “My life wasn’t a fairytale, Shaw, and I wouldn’t
have pitied you.”

     She snorted as she moved her mouse around. “Oh please, so you had
a stepdad that was a jerk. Your mom adores you and most likely married the man
so she could give you everything your little heart desired. The stories you’ve
shared consisted of not one hardship except having to work some menial jobs for
your stepdad. Ninety percent of the world works menial jobs, but now you’ve
been blessed with a job that will make you millions.”

     I inhaled and exhaled a slow breath to keep my ire in check,
because the woman was throwing down hard, and the words were hitting me painfully
because there was truth to them. I didn’t think of myself as spoiled, but
things
had
been easy for me, and what my mother had done for me was a
direct hit.     

     “So you resent me because I had money growing up and have had an easy
life?” I gritted out.

     “I told you why I resent you.” She spit out with a glare…but
behind the heat of anger I saw a hollowness that dampened my anger.

     “I didn’t think of you as an easy lay, Shaw. You weren’t. I like
you…a lot. And…”

     She broke me off mid-sentence going back to working on her
keyboard, lips tight. “I know…
you like me, we had fun together
…it’s what
your other women said; ‘
He was a great guy, and we had fun together, but he
warned me from the start that he didn’t do relationships for more than a
month’. It wasn’t her, it was you; you have a brain ‘thing
’…” Shaw air
quoted then went back to tapping at her keyboard. “
And it causes you to get
bored with things really quickly. You’re sorry, but you still want to remain
friends
.” She gave a hard jab to a key and looked up, face rigid. “There, I
made it easy for you. Are we done now?” 

     Damn, she got my blood running, while at the same time had my mind
scrambling. Deviating from my original plan I strode over, gripped her upper
arms, and pulled her to within inches of my face. Expression startled, she
grabbed my arms and our position instantly had my cock taking notice. Having
her back in my arms was lighting up all my nerve endings.  

     “While I want to discuss how you know so much about all that,
that’s not what I was going to say. I was going to say that my emotions
concerning you have me all fucked up. I don’t know my head from my ass.” Her
fingers compressed on my arms and her mouth parted slightly in surprise which
made it harder to concentrate. “You make me crazy, Shaw; like no one ever has.
Yes, I admit that my body took immediate notice of you when we first met and my
primary thought was sex, but as time progressed you fascinated my mind just as
much. You are an amazing person, Shaw.”

     Her expression turned angry again and she tried pulling away, but
I could see the scornful disbelief under her anger. “I don’t need you pouring
sugar all over your words, just tell me what you came to say.”

     I subdued her struggles. God, how had I missed the insecurity in
her? Rejected as an infant and then shuffled around in foster care her whole
life; it had to have left a deep scar inside her. She wouldn’t want to see my
pity, but shit, my heart ached for her.  

     “Shaw, I’m not sugar-coating anything. You’ve had a hard life,
been shit on by some shitty people, and I’ve never been more impressed or
respected anyone more…except maybe my mother. I know you have a chip on your
shoulder towards males, and from what I’ve seen it’s deserved, and my past may
seem like a red flag but I was not using you. I have no recollection at all of
calling you wild. When that guy spewed that crap to me months ago I was mad as
fuck at him. I didn’t pursue you because of the shit that came out of his
mouth; hell, I was already in pursuit of you.” I gave her a small shake to
emphasize my point and desire. “I’m sorry as hell that I said those words. The
only explanation I can come up with is the combination of alcohol, tiredness,
and finally having you in my arms messed with my latent memories because I
can’t think of anything else. I wanted you because of you, not because of any
rumors some fucking asshole was spreading about you.”

     Shaw stared at me in wide-eyed astonishment and for the first time
appeared to be struck silent. During that time my body took more notice of
hers. She was breathing deeply causing her breasts to tease my chest with
possibilities, her grip on my arms was firm making me wish they would roam, and
her face had a beautiful pink blush.

     Fuck, I wanted to immerse myself in her. 

     “Okay…so…you found out why I was mad and apologized. Are you done
hounding me now?” She breathed out, standing perfectly still.

     The way she phrased that almost had me shaking her harder, but
what I heard beneath the words had me wondering. “What if I don’t want to be
done?” Involuntarily, my thumbs stroked over her forearms.

     She swallowed. “I told you, Evan. I don’t want to be Miss
August…or September.” She declared tightly, leaning away from my grasp.

     I pulled her back. “I don’t want you to be either.” Not anymore.
“And now that you mention that
again
…What exactly do you know about my
past relationships? And who have you been speaking to.” This woman was scary
with how she found out shit. 

     She gave me an evil look. “I haven’t been
speaking
with
anyone, but I have been communicating with some of your harem through various
social media’s. It’s something I should have done before we….” Her flush
deepened and I found myself grinning. It wasn’t often she got flustered and
when she did it was endearing. Her eye’s narrowed and I swallowed my grin
quickly. “Fucked.” My eyes narrowed this time. I didn’t like her saying it that
way.

     “It didn’t surprise me really.” She sneered, jerking from my grip
and backing away. “All you athletes get around, but the way you were hooking
your women was quite unique; get friendly with them, stroke their ego, bring up
the genius detail so when it’s time to call it quits you can blame it on autism
or some shit like that, and part with no hard feelings. No muss, no fuss. I’d
call it genius, but that would be redundant.”

     She was fucking killing me, because everything she said had some
partial truths to it. I stabbed my fingers through my hair in agitation and
began to pace. “That might be what it looks like, but it’s not
exactly
like that, Shaw. Yeah, I’ve had past relationships, but I didn’t play any of those
women. I never revealed to anyone else that I was a genius, but I did inform
women from the beginning that I was wired with a short attention span.”

    “A nice ‘get out free and clear’ card.” She mocked.

    I scowled at her. “Don’t make it out like I was misleading them. I
gave them the truth and they accepted it before we went further in the affair.”

    “Why didn’t you with me?” She slapped at her chest nearly yelling.
The guard she’d had up was gone and all that was left was pure vulnerability
and hurt. “Was it because I’m a nobody piece of trailer trash that can be used
and discarded like garbage? I didn’t deserve to have a heads up that I was only
going to be a body for you to utilize for a couple of weeks?”

     Her words were a punch in the chest and a knife in the gut. Was
that how she saw herself, how she thought I saw her? Was this what life had
done to her, what the fuckers who’d harassed her had marked her with. I wanted
to turn back time and change everything about her life, change how I’d
approached her…unfortunately I couldn’t do that. 

      Grabbing her arms again I stared at her earnestly. “Shaw, you are
not trailer trash. I was going with my normal flow, but then the flow took a
turn and got serious.”

     She blinked in confusion, eyes dark with questions. “What do you
mean…serious?”

     “My feelings for you; they didn’t stay light and fluffy like with
the other women I went out with. They got damn serious, pretty damn fast. The
more we talked, the more I wanted you, and the less I could think
intelligently. Let me tell you that no one has made me stupid like you do.” And
wasn’t that a kick in the ass. “Standard wasn’t standard anymore, and I didn’t
know how to proceed. All I knew was that I wanted you; it was a consuming and
uncontrollable addiction.”

     Her eyes were wide on me in bemusement as she jeered lowly. “You
had me, so you should be all set now.”

     My heart twisted at her forced attitude and I stroked my knuckle
down her jaw line. She fought so fiercely to protect herself. “Shaw, I am so
not set. Your body is only a part of what I want from you. I want all of you.”
I caressed her bottom lip. “I want your mouth; not just for kissing, but for everything
that comes out of it.” I moved up to her eyebrow. “And the fire in your eyes
makes my blood burn. And these freckles on your cheeks, nose, and lips…” Each
area I touched was hot from the blush spreading over her face. “I want to kiss
each and every one.”

     She inhaled a shaky breath, her fiery eyes swimming with skepticism.
She looked so fragile and scared, and I couldn’t hold off any longer. Tangling my
fingers in her hair I closed the last few inches between us and took her mouth,
groaning at the exquisite taste of her. It had been too fucking long. Dropping
one arm to her lower back I hauled her flush against me and groaned again. She
felt so damn good.

     Shaw was rigid in my arms at first, but then a whimper escaped her
throat and her arms inched up around my neck as she pressed herself into me;
returning my kiss with increasing vigor.

     I growled harshly as relief swept through me. “I’ve been dying for
a taste of you again. I’ve been going out of my fucking mind.”