Embrace, Entice, Emblaze (9 page)

But
most
exiled angels are corrupted, dangerous, and lethal. Their extravagant wars, combined with their need to exalt themselves

over humanity, make them the kind of predator most people

cannot even begin to imagine.”

“They’re at war with each other?” It was surreal, hearing myself ask these questions.
Angels, other realms, good and evil
…I was tempted to pinch myself, check if I was dreaming, even though I knew I wasn’t.

“Since the beginning of time, light and dark have always been

in opposition. In the angel realm, they are bound by their laws— in our world, there are no such restrictions. An eternity of rivalry between the two forces is given the perfect arena on earth. The 66

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visual effects of slaying flesh are much more…gratifying than spiritual combat.”

Griffin stared at me, his expression grave. “There are only three things both light and dark exiles have in common. They despise

each other, they hate Grigori, and they place no value on the casualties of their brutal wars.”

Excellent news. Not only was I apparently some weird angel-

human combo, but I already had myself a badass immortal enemy.

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chapter
nine

“Our duty is to be useful, not according to our desires but
according to our powers.”

henri frÉdÉric aMieL

We sat in silence. Lincoln was looking anywhere but at me. Griffi n seemed to be waiting, probably giving me a chance to process.
Like
that’s going to happen.
I found myself staring at my wall, the wall I was going to have so much fun painting.

“Okay,” I sighed. I knew I couldn’t avoid this conversation. “So, what are Grigori?”

Griffi n snapped to right away. He was well into lecturer mode.

“When angels fi rst began taking human form and wreaking havoc

on earth, their governing body, the Seraphim, made an agreement.

Th ey devised a plan to put what they called Grigori on earth.

Originally, angels held these positions. However, the same weaknesses that aff ected exiles also weakened the angels and they failed.

So the Seraphim found another way.”

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“Humans,” I said.

Griffin nodded. “If a child loses either parent within their first twelve days of life, the aura around that child provides a gateway for an angel to impart a portion of its essence. Both angels of light and dark, from all ranks, are able to give their essence to humans— and along with it, many of their unique abilities and strengths.” He stopped, taking a sip of coffee and leaning back on the couch.

“How many ranks are there?” I asked.

“Nine. Ten, if you count The Sole. I’ll draw you a family tree. It seems complicated at first, but it won’t take you long.”

I watched as he grabbed a notepad from the coffee table and

quickly sketched some kind of hierarchy on the paper. At the top he wrote “Seraphim” and listed the other ranks from there, but

at the end I noticed he went back to the top and scribbled “The Sole” above. Some of the names I recognized, like Cherubim

and Archangels; others, like Dominations and Powers, didn’t

ring any bells.

I finally succumbed and grabbed one of the towels from the

coffee table to soak up some of the water dripping from my hair.

At least mopping up water was something I understood. I let the towel cover my face while I sucked in a few deep breaths and snuck a peek at the front door, teasing myself with the prospect of escape.

Griffin took another quick sip of coffee, watching me. He was

waiting for me to say something, but what the hell was I supposed to say?

“Would you prefer a short answer?” Griffin offered.

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Jessica shirvington

“Please,” I said, relieved.

Griffin spoke consolingly. “Grigori are the gardeners. We clear the weeds. Although the folklore has been distorted over time, the theory is the same. Grigori is translated in some texts as
Watcher
and has also morphed into translations of
Guardian
. Put it with
angel
and you get…?” He sat, patiently, waiting.

My stomach glided up into my chest. I could barely believe the

words I was about to say. “Guardian Angels?”

“The short version…yes,” he said plainly.

I sat up awkwardly, searching for a way out of this. “If I have this essence in me, why don’t I know? Surely I would have felt

something by now?”

If
I
had
been
able
to
fly
over
here
on
a
cloud,
I
would
have
saved
myself
the
drenching— or better yet, used it to get the hell out of here!

Griffin gave a half smile and I wondered how many times he had

delivered this story, how many people had looked back at him with disbelieving eyes.

“When a child reaches the age of seventeen, the essence is awakened. At this point, he or she can choose to go through the final journey of embracing the gifts. Only then will they have the powers of a Grigori.”

There was so much swimming around in my mind. I glanced

quickly at Lincoln, then back at Griffin.

“Lincoln said I was his partner or something. What does that

mean?” Definitely not the kind of partner I was hoping to become when I left the house this morning, I knew that much.

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“Grigori always work in twos, just like everything in the universe.

Sun and moon, earth and water, man and woman— you get the drift.

The first of a pair is told the name of his or her partner when first becoming Grigori. Lincoln has been a Grigori for nine years, but has always been destined to be your partner. That’s why he’s been here for the last couple of years. He came to start preparing you.”

“It’s not the only reason,” Lincoln said quietly from the kitchen.

Griffin frowned.

I did a quick calculation and focused my reply only on Griffin.

“Lincoln’s twenty- two. How can he have been a Grigori for nine years when he only turned seventeen five years ago?”

Griffin sighed and gave me a sorry smile. “Oh, darlin’,” he said, and for the first time I noticed a slight country twang in his voice.

“One of the traits of being a Grigori is that we age at a slower rate, increasingly slower the older we get.”

I looked over at Lincoln. He was leaning against the kitchen

bench, looking at the ground. Another lie.

My voice was quiet, as I couldn’t entirely comprehend the words I was about to use. “Am I”— I felt stupid even asking— “immortal?” Griffin smiled more genuinely this time and I was immediately

embarrassed for asking. “No such luck. We’re still half human.

While stronger and more resilient than normal, we’re still susceptible to injury and inevitable mortality.”

It was a sign of how bad things had become that I was relieved—

at least death was still a certainty.

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chapter
ten

“This is your fate, the destiny I have planned for you…”

JereMiah 13:25

Everything stalled. Not just around me, but in my head. Something wasn’t allowing me to process what I was hearing. It’s not like you fi nd out you’re part angel every day of the week.

Griffi n stepped outside to take a call, leaving me alone with Lincoln for the fi rst time. I’d been trying so hard to ignore him, standing in the kitchen watching nervously as Griffi n explained why he’d been lying to me ever since we fi rst met. Fresh tears welled in my eyes when I glanced in his direction.

“Tell me, Linc.” My voice cut into the silence and he started a little to hear me talking to him. “Why rock climbing, marathon

running?” I sounded belligerent and childish. I didn’t care.

He straightened up and moved a little closer toward me, still

keeping a safe distance away. “Training. It’s all versions of what we do when we train to be Grigori. I fi gured if you could do the work Embrace_FinalINT.indd 72

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before coming of age, you’d be stronger. I just wanted you to be prepared, have the upper hand...” He looked like he wanted to say more but stopped himself. Instead, he watched me with hopeful eyes.

“The whole time I’ve known you, you’ve been lying to me.” I

felt stupid, thinking of how he had just appeared in my life and I had never questioned it. “Pretending to be my friend. Telling me to trust you…” I felt like I was going to be sick. He’d told me he would protect me. Had that all been more of his lies?

“I told you my secrets.” I stood and slowly walked toward him,

my legs shaking. “I let you tell me it was okay. I believed you.” I felt tears escape, slipping down my cheeks, but I wasn’t finished. I knew I had about thirty seconds left before I’d lose it completely and wouldn’t be able to talk.

He was silent.

“How stupid could I have been, thinking you actually cared?”

I shook my head, half laughing at myself. I was just as mad with myself as I was with him. Almost. “You must have thought I was

pathetic. I actually thought I loved…”

I moved my feet apart as tears came pouring down. “You never

cared.” My hand clenched into a fist, unable to control the fury brewing within. “You just wanted to turn me into some kind of

fighter, a warrior for your stupid cause!”

I struck out, hitting him across the face once, but hard, with

a closed fist— just like he had taught me in so many of our kickboxing sessions. Just like he had always wanted me to, but I had been too scared. Too scared to hurt him.

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Jessica shirvington

He would have seen it coming, but he didn’t dodge it. He just

stood there and took it.

“I don’t even know you.” The words left my mouth devoid of

any emotion.

Griffin reappeared out of nowhere and flung his arms around

me in a death grip, stopping me from hitting Lincoln again. I

wouldn’t have anyway.

“You’ve trained her well, Lincoln,” he said, slightly amused. He slowly released me. “I hate to tell you this, Violet, but that probably hurt you a lot more than him.”

Like he was telling me anything I didn’t already know.

Lincoln ignored Griffin and just looked at me. “It wasn’t a

lie.” He shook his head as he spoke. Trying to convince himself probably. “I just didn’t tell you everything. I couldn’t. I wasn’t allowed. So many times I wanted to tell you. The way you feel…I feel…” He dropped his head, but I didn’t miss the guilty glance he flashed at Griffin. “…that has
always
been real. You needed to know the truth first so there were no secrets between us. Violet, it’s more complicated than you realize. It’s not that I don’t— ” I threw my hand in the air to cut him off. “NO!”

I knew where that sentence might have been going and I couldn’t hear it. I didn’t know if I was strong enough to hear it, didn’t know if I would have been able to maintain the small amount of control I was desperately hanging on to. I shook my head and managed to say one more time, “No.”

I went to the only place a girl can go. The bathroom. Once

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safely locked inside, I waged an internal war between going back out there or just climbing out the window and disappearing.