Embrace, Entice, Emblaze (79 page)

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Jessica shirvington

Ermina were so devout in their religion— if I lived in a place like this, maybe I’d have had faith too. Maybe.

The senses intensified as I neared one of the smaller waterfalls. It was strange sensing him like this, knowing he was calling me. Even stranger that I was going to him, aware of the power he had over me. There was no point running from him. It was too late for that.

I found a trail that was carved into the mountain and started the climb. I fought the nauseousness as I climbed higher and clamped my hands into tight fists, letting my nails dig harshly into my skin to distract me from the déjà vu of being surrounded by cliffs.

As I neared where I knew he would be, water spritzed over me,

the wayward sprays from the waterfall, and I spotted the path

that led behind it. So many things went through my mind, so

many memories. I wondered if he was putting them there. Then,

I wondered if he was thinking them too. My hand moved to my

waist and my fingers wrapped around the hilt of my dagger. It

would be no use to me here. For one thing, Phoenix was a better fighter than I was. And he knew it.

I followed the path into an opening behind the flow of water

coming from above. I expected it to be noisy and wet. Oddly, it was quiet and dry.

He stood on the far side, a few yards away. Despite the heat, he was wearing jeans and a fitted dark denim jacket. He rested easy on the rocks.

I expected him to say something cruel or make some snide

remark. I expected to say something myself, but neither one of

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us spoke. It was worse. His chocolate eyes were bitter and cold. I finally realized that no matter what had been, no matter how real either his feelings or mine…

He’s going to do this.

And
I’m not going to let him.

Our eyes locked and his seemed to warm a little. But it was only to share in a brief moment of acceptance…and regret. It wasn’t

going to change anything.

“I see you and your people found your way here safely,” he said.

“You actually sound like you’re glad.”

“I wouldn’t have made it so easy for them if I hadn’t wanted

you here.”

He was playing with me. “Right. We came for the Scriptures.”

“Who do you think led you here?” he asked, his smile a little

tilted. Secrets hidden within.

“We found the old stories, Phoenix. We know where to look,”

I pushed.

“I know. I all but opened the books and put them under your

noses. You never would have found the location if it weren’t for me.” The penny dropped. “The exiles at the farmhouse.”

He just continued smiling.

“That’s why they were really there, so they could tell us about the Rules. Why? You don’t want to help us.” I knew that much.

“No, but it seems I might need you after all,” he said, his tone becoming bitter.

“Why all the games, Phoenix? Why did you do it?”

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“You have yourself to thank for that. You showed me there is only one place for me in this world. I’d been fooling myself, granted. I’ll not make the same mistake twice.” He was suddenly interested in the cave wall, picking at a piece of stone, avoiding looking at me.

“I meant Lincoln. I know you were the one who sent Nahilius.”

He shrugged, not surprised or worried that I’d figured it out. “It was mutual benefit. I see he made it here anyway. I take it Nahilius is downward- bound.”

I didn’t answer.

“Still afraid to admit what you are?” He smiled. “Never did like the Cherubim.”

I shook my head in disbelief, grasping what he was telling me. The exiles he’d given to Nahilius had all been Cherubs, as was Nahilius. I remembered Phoenix had some kind of grudge against them.

“You knew he’d be able to beat those exiles you sent after him.

You wanted him to do it.” I couldn’t hold back the anger pulsing out of me, or the look of disgust.

“It was a win- win,” he said, now holding my glare.

“You make me sick.”

He took a step toward me, staring right through me. “I make

you many things,” he said, his voice traveling the length of me. I tried to ignore it, not be affected. But when he took the next step, he opened a channel to himself.

“Don’t,” I said, putting up my defenses and mentally pushing

him out. I was shaking with a frightening sensation of want. Then fear of want.

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“Do you think I need the
power
to reach you?” He half laughed.

“Do you think I don’t know how your thoughts drift to that night, to when you were in my arms?”

“I’m with Lincoln,” I blurted out, surprising myself as much

as Phoenix. He took a step back, his jaw clenched. I had said the wrong thing.

“You’re lying,” he growled. “If you were with him, you’d be

weakened and you’re not.” His eyes grew wide when I hesitated.

“Oh,” he said.

I bit down on my lip.

“My plan brought you together, you just haven’t— ”

“It’s none of your business!” Why was it that everyone seemed

to know so much about my love life just from looking at me?

“Wait. It doesn’t make…” He stopped.

I held my breath when his eyes churned with fury.

“You think you’re kindred souls, don’t you?” he snapped, taking those few steps back toward me until he was just inches away.

“Don’t you?” he repeated, this time darkly bleeding into me as

much compulsion to answer him as he could.

“Yes,” I replied, for a moment under his spell.

He was silent as he contemplated my response. Finally, he

straightened.

“Well, it makes sense you’d be willing to sacrifice your life again for him. I admit, though, I’m surprised you’d be willing to sacrifice
his
life for you.”

“What are you talking about?”

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He laughed lightly, though his brow was still furrowed. “Still

diving in head first without all the information. That naïvety of yours really is going to get you— or someone else— into trouble, Violet.”

“Are you finished?” I asked, turning to walk away.

“Tell your people I’ll give them the morning, but the Scriptures will reveal themselves to me come tomorrow evening. If you want any chance to get hold of them, you’ll be in place then.”

I walked away but felt the push. One step, two steps.

Move, move.

And I did. I kept going. I didn’t stop. But for just a second, I couldn’t resist. I dropped my guard and sucked in what he was

sending— an explosion of lust, a feeling of unfettered bliss just as I’d remembered. My eyes rolled back in wicked delight as I forced my feet forward and stopped them turning back to him.

Like
a
damn
junkie!

I snuck back into the north wing of the hotel, grateful to

spot Zoe.

“Hey,” I called out, running to catch up with her. “Where are

you going?”

“Everyone’s meeting with Azeem and some local Grigori. I guess

we’ll fill them in and find out if they can help us.”

“Oh.”

“You okay? You look wasted.”

“Yeah. Umm…I think I might skip this one. Can you tell Griffin

and Lincoln that I was too exhausted? I’ll be in my room if anyone needs me.”

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“Sure. I’ll stop by and get you on the way to dinner if you want?” she offered.

“Thanks,” I called after her as she hurried off. She didn’t want to miss any action. Pity she’d already missed today’s main event.

By the end of the night, I was going to have to explain to

everyone that I’d wandered off to have a little one- on- one time with Phoenix. But before that came the harder task: I was going to have to explain it to myself.

When I made it back to my room, I really was exhausted. I had

no idea what was going on with my body clock or what time it was.

I turned on the shower, undressed, and sat in the bath with the water pelting down and random tears falling.

My life is not how I imagined it would be. In some ways, I

was starting to like being a Grigori. I mean, the power was great.

The strength alone gave me confidence I’d never had before, and knowing I could sense beings before they arrived was a bonus too.

The obvious downside was that I knew a whole lot more bad was

coming my way. And Phoenix.

I tried to keep things black and white, but as everyone is always telling me, nothing ever is. I loved Lincoln— absolutely, totally, jump- off- a- cliff for him loved him— even when I’d shared that time with Phoenix. But…

There is always a
but
.

Phoenix and I had been friends.
Really
good friends. When I had felt like there was no one else, he had been there. I know now that he had been lying to me through a lot of it, and I could never 311

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forgive him for forcing me to choose life as a Grigori when he could have healed Lincoln himself. Of course, if he
had
healed Lincoln, he would have probably had the power over Lincoln that he now

held over me and…I was doubtful he’d have procrastinated for too long about reinstating Lincoln’s wounds.

And, I couldn’t help it, there was a part of me that was drawn to Phoenix. I’ve told myself it’s just his abilities, his pull of seduction and floods of lust, that he influences me and controls my emotions, but it’s more than that. I was unhealthily aware of those things, yet still unable to resist. And as bad as this might sound, it wasn’t even
him
so much as his
power
to make it all go away.

He’s the ultimate escape.

For someone who has spent a long time denying herself the right to run or quit or anything of the sort, Phoenix was like the biggest wagon I could ever fall off.

I’d turned wrinkly and the water was starting to run cold when I heard a knock on the door. I jumped up and wrapped a towel around myself, expecting to see Zoe on the other side of the door collecting me for dinner. When I opened it, it wasn’t Zoe standing there.

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

“Did I or did I not help you make your plan work with Lincoln?”

“Yes,” I said slowly.

“Have I or have I not backed you up on a number of cases of

questionable judgment lately?”

“I guess.”

“Well, it’s time for payback. Where do I sleep?” Spence said,

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pushing past me and walking right into my room. “Nice towel, by the way. I’m not big on wearing clothes in my room either. This is going to work out well.” He dumped his bag on the bed, unzipped it, and started unpacking.

“Whoa! Hang on. How did you get here? I mean— hang on!”

I said, ducking back into the bathroom and wrapping a bathrobe

around me before I reappeared. “Okay, explain,” I demanded.

Spence leapt onto the bed and reclined, putting his hands

behind his head. “It was genius, really. I stowed away on the army truck they loaded onto the plane at the last minute. I had the truck waiting for me round the back of the airport. While you all were all comfy upstairs, I rummaged through Rudyard’s bag and found

the address for the hotel. Took me a while to get here— had to get a local bus and then hitch part of the way, plus get past the security, which took a while— but here I am. Did you miss me?”

I should have protested, but instead I collapsed next to him.

“Yes,” I said, realizing how much it was true. Spence was crazy, unpredictable, and had a serious death wish at times, but I wasn’t his keeper and right now I really needed someone to talk to. “You are going to die when I tell you what’s been going on.”

“Like I’ve said before,” he began, making strained noises as he reached over me to grab a bottle of water, “never a dull moment with you, Eden.” He cracked the lid open, took a sip, and sighed dramatically. “Spill.”

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chapter
twenty- five

“Thou art to me a delicious torment.”

RaLph WaLdo eMeRsoN

“Hey, you get there okay?” Steph asked, sounding worried.

“Yeah. And thanks to you, we got to Lincoln in time too,” I

said, hovering by the window that looked out over one of the hot springs…and more mountains. Th e cell reception wasn’t great in my room.