According to his mum, being obsessive-compulsive made him easy prey, and she would only believe any potential boyfriend had good intentions toward him if he happened to have as much as, or more money than, Cedric did.
Thankfully her opinion didn’t matter to him.
For one thing, he’d had firsthand experience on how much of a sadistic bastard a “suitable candidate” could be. Then there was the fact that nobody knew better than Cedric what he needed, and as it turned out, Kevin was it.
“Are you out of your mind?” she asked through gritted teeth. “You’re thinking of staying in America and renouncing your family in order to be with a man that only wants your money?”
“Because what else could he, or anyone else for that matter, want from someone like me, right?” Cedric growled. “You don’t know Kevin, Mum. I would appreciate it if you refrained from insulting him.”
“Don’t get upset, dear,” she rushed to placate him. “You know I have your best interests at heart.”
Cedric could have argued that.
He could’ve pointed out how he would be slowly going barmy in her house had he not insisted on moving out. He could’ve demanded she stopped sharing news of his siblings long enough to realize Cedric had a life too, but he didn’t have the energy for it.
“And so do I, Mum,” was what he said instead. “It’s time you trust me to know what’s best for me.”
“What if things don’t work out?” she asked, tears clear in her voice. “What if you relapse? What if you freak out? What if this man takes advantage of you?”
“He won’t,” Cedric said, not a speck of doubt in his mind. “Anything is possible, and there’s only so much progress I can make, but if there’s one thing I can count on it’s Kevin’s honor. He would never use or take advantage of me.”
And when I get better I’ll get to hang out with his wonderful kids.
“It sounds like you really fancy this man, but isn’t it too soon to be so sure about something like this?”
“Maybe.” He grabbed his backpack, and stepped out of his office. “But sometimes you just know.”
And get a hold of your neurosis, and follow the man of your dreams inside a germ-ridden sex shop.
“That is the truth,” she whispered. “Just like I knew when I met your dad.”
“Just like that,” he repeated, confident his mum would now see things in a different light. She was a romantic at heart. “I’ll talk to you soon, Mum.”
He ended the call, sent a text to Roberto to be ready to go, and headed for the lift. He was scheduled to see Dr. Hoffman, his primary doctor. They were to discuss antidepressants, male potency enhancers, and Cedric’s sexual life. That was an appointment he couldn’t miss, as his future relationship with Kevin depended on it, but first he had to stop by the construction site, and have a talk with his bloke.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Having read dozens of traumatizing-for-all-parties-involved coming out stories online, Kevin had no hope his would be any different.
He feared a rebellious tantrum from his teenage son that no doubt would lead to drugs and alcohol abuse in the future. Brianna would be confused. She’d cry a lot, and she’d grow up thinking all guys were assholes. She’d never be able to trust them because her own father had let her down. Ava, thank goodness, was too young to comprehend. She’d be the only reprieve he’d get.
Still, it had to be done, and like they said, there’s no time like the present.
The reason he had taken so long to come out of the closet was, even though he’d practiced different ways to tell his kids he was gay, he’d been incapable of settling on one. When he’d mentioned to Jenny he didn’t have a clue what the best way to do it was, she had said they should get professional help.
After a meticulous search, he and Jenny had finally chosen a pediatric psychologist to provide counseling to the kids, and had been all set to meet with her in two weeks. But after Thursday night’s premature introduction of Cedric to their children, Jenny had called Dr. Avalos and moved up the appointment to Saturday afternoon.
Thank God.
In Kevin’s opinion two days was too long a wait. The way the kids were carrying on about Cedric, it was imperative he talk to them about the changes in his life.
And so here he was.
“Do you guys know what being gay means?” Kevin asked his kids once they all got settled in Dr. Avalos’s soothing counseling room.
“It means boys like boys, and girls like girls,” Brianna answered immediately. “Like, Kurt loves Blaine, and Santana loves Brittany.”
Kevin frowned. “And Kurt and Blaine are…?” His oldest daughter tended to be a fountain of knowledge and information, and sometimes he had a hard time keeping up with her.
“They’re from
Glee
.” Brianna’s smile couldn’t have been wider. “I love them.”
Aha
. A television show.
“Rick Welts is gay,” TK added, rolling his eyes at his sister. “He resigned his CEO position with the Suns so that he could be with his partner.”
“Yeah…” Kevin glanced at Jenny, and smiled a little when she nodded encouragingly. They were still a little uncomfortable around each other after their phone conversation, but they remained committed. They would always come together to do what was best for their kids. “Just like Rick Welts.”
“He’s not a fruit like Kurt, though,” TK added.
“Timothy Kevin Morrison! What have I told you about name-calling, young man?” Jenny gave their son her best watch-your-mouth-or-you’ll-be-in-big-trouble look.
“Susie’s brother sez Barney’s gay.” Ava grabbed Kevin’s face. “I like Barney. He’s big and purple. Are all gays purple, Daddy?”
“Of course not,” he said, hugging his baby girl. “I’m not purple, am I?”
Kevin held his breath, and waited for the kids to catch on to what he had implied.
Brianna, as usual, was faster. A deep “v” formed between her eyebrows. Her lips trembled, and there were tears in her blue eyes when she looked at Kevin. “You’re gay?”
Kevin nodded. He tried to talk to her, but the knot in his throat made it impossible.
“But you were married to Mommy,” she whispered. “Is that why you got a divorce?”
“No, sweetheart,” Jenny said. “We got a divorce because although your daddy and I love each other very much, we are not
in
love. Do you understand the difference?”
“Yeah…” Brianna nodded slowly. “In love means married and happily ever after… right?”
“Yes,” Kevin explained. “When people are in love they feel like they can’t live without that particular person, and they want to grow old together.”
“Hold it.” TK got up from his chair, and stood in front of Kevin. “How can you be gay now? Aren’t gays
born
gay?”
Jesus. When had his son gotten so perceptive?
“I’m pretty sure I’ve always been gay.” Kevin looked at TK straight in the eye when he answered. He wasn’t about to hold anything back at this point. “But I wasn’t ready to accept it until recently.”
“Well, that was stupid.” TK’s words were followed by another eye roll. “It ain’t like you coulda changed it. People say so on TV and sh—everywhere.”
“I’m happy it took so long for him to figure it out, though,” Jenny said, her smile a clear indication of how proud she was of their son. “I quite like it that we got to marry and have you three brats before going our separate ways.”
“Do you have a boyfriend?” Brianna whispered.
Don’t I wish
, Kevin thought.
He was old school. He liked labels. He wanted to stake a claim, and have the world know he and Cedric were together. But how the hell was he going to do that when he had nothing to bring to the table?
“He’s not quite my boyfriend, but yes, I’m seeing someone,” he finally said. He just wished he could find a way to make it last.
“I wan’a boyfriend, Daddy.” Ava rested her blonde head on Kevin’s chest, and grabbed his neck with her little fingers. “Can I have a boyfriend?”
Kevin chuckled, and tickled her with his nose.
“Is it Cedric?” TK asked “’Cause he’s the only friend you’ve brought home with you.”
“Yeah,” Kevin admitted. The sooner he got that detail out of the way, the better.
“Oh, I like him!” Brianna’s frown was promptly replaced by a dreamy smile. “He’s got awesome hair, and he likes Harry Potter.”
“Who cares about stupid Harry Potter?” TK said to his sister. “Did you see his ride?” He grinned like only a teenage boy with a thing for cars would. “It’s
sweet
. You’re right about the hair, though. Mad badass, right?”
Yup. TK was going to die if he ever got to see Cedric’s other car.
“Ric let me touch his hair. Iz soft,” Ava added. “He’s sick with Oz, and he don’t like germs. I don’t like bugs either.”
So simple… so accepting. Kevin wished the entire world was as uncomplicated as his baby girl.
“Wait, what?” Jenny looked at Kevin. “He’s sick with what?”
“OCD,” Kevin clarified. “I mentioned it on the phone the other night.”
“Yes… yes, you did. That explains the gloves, and his reaction to Ava. It makes sense.”
Kevin nodded.
“Mommy, can you do my hair like ‘Ric’s?” Ava asked.
“I don’t see why not,” Jenny said after glancing at Kevin, a sad, apologetic smile forming on her lips. It was obvious she regretted the way she had behaved the night she met Cedric. “I’ll braid your hair tomorrow when Daddy drops you off, okay?”
And there it was. A peace offering if Kevin ever heard one.
“So, he’s what?” TK asked. “Like a third dad or something? Is that why he made breakfast and talked to us?”
“No, he isn’t like a dad.” Kevin responded in a rush. For all he knew, Cedric would take off, and the kids wouldn’t see him again. It wasn’t right to let them think they’d get to hang out without talking to Cedric first. “But he really likes to cook. He makes awesome pancakes. Well, awesome everything, really.”
Christ, did he sound besotted or what?
“But he slept at your house,” Brianna said.
Lord have mercy.
“Only mommies and daddies sleep in the same house,” Ava added.
TK snickered, as if he knew better than his little sister. It was definitely time for father and son to have a serious talk.
“When the day comes for Daddy to settle down with a partner, we’ll be like… like a real
Modern Family
,” Jenny said. “But not yet. He doesn’t know Cedric all that well.”
Say what?
He didn’t appreciate his ex-wife’s statement, especially after admitting to her Cedric was his center. And she was wrong anyway. Cedric might not have told him what his original plan was when he moved to New York, but there wasn’t much Kevin didn’t know about his lover.
And I’m ready and fucking willing to settle down right now if only I could, just so you know!
Whoa. Just…
whoa
. Where the hell had that come from?
One moment he was thinking he had nothing to bring to the table, and the next he was ready to set up shop and move in with Cedric. He was all over the place, and if he didn’t get a grip, he would never be able to have a conversation with the guy.
“
Modern Family
?” Kevin repeated, set on not getting into another argument with Jenny, and unwilling to analyze his thoughts and feelings.
“From TV, Daddy,” Brianna told him. “Mitchell and Cam are gay and they have a daughter.”
“Meh….”
TK’s disappointed comment caught Kevin’s attention. “Do you have a problem with, you know, being like Modern Family?” he asked his son.
“Nah. Cedric’s mad cool. He plays soccer, and he doesn’t dress out of style like Will does.” TK glanced at Jenny, and shrugged. “Sorry Mom, but he does.” He grinned at Kevin. “I was just hoping I’d get a hot stepmom like Gloria.”