Burden (9 page)

She flattened her hand against my chest again, and closed her eyes to concentrate fully on the beat she found there.

“You didn’t tell me about this. Tell me why they beat the same now.” There was a scratchy quality to her voice after that whisper of a kiss. I knew without question that it was us, the throb of desire that caused it and the race to my heart that matched her own.

I laid back and took in
the wonder of her, us, let it seep through me as I told her the last piece of the story of the black bear.

“Well, when the Creator finally found the black bear after so much searching, He was so relieved and overjoyed that His heart stopped. And that’s why after waiting and searching for our mates, He wanted us to have no doubt when we found the ones we are supposed to love as deeply and as He first loved us. So when we see our mates for the first t
ime, our heart stops and changes to beat with each other.”

I knew what question would come next and I hated to tell it to her for fear of her reaction.

“And when one mate dies?”

“When the male dies, he just dies. The female lives on.”

“And if I die?”

“If the female dies,” I refused to even form the sentence with her and dying joined, “the male dies along with her. Both of their hearts stop.”

She slapped her hand over her mouth. I took it into mine and kissed her palm, trying to reassure her, “We think it’s mostly for the cubs. Maybe the Creator thought the male’s death would be hard, but the female’s death would be devastating to a cub. We don’t really know why it is that way. We just accept it. But there’s no reason to even think about it. You and I will have a long, amazing life. Let’s talk about something else.”

She was still somber, but then a tiny smile e
rupted on her face, “Like your Beta is going to be here soon and I’m still in this.”

A growl broke out from my mouth before I could stop it. She took off towards her room but I caught up with her easily. I stopped her mid stride, lifting her by her waist and pressing her against my chest. My next words were deep and raspy in her ear, “Tomorrow night is the full moon. Couples are strongest on that night. Mark me as your mate and let me mark you. It’s killing me for others to see you as unspoken for.”

“It’s not so easy seeing the way Chloe looks at you, either. You’re gonna have to help me. I don’t even know what to do.” I heard the disarming tone in her voice and turned her to face me, “No, I don’t. You’re a strong female with an excellent instinct. The way you knew how to calm me in the kitchen when I was enraged that night—that was your bear. She’s fierce about me already. Let her lead you.”

She squinted and
rested her forehead against mine, “Have you been talking to Martha? She said the same thing.”

“Is that a yes, Coeur?”

“It’s a yes.”

“Remind me to buy Martha something great for Christmas and help me find her a good mate. How no male around here has scooped her up is beyond me.”

She shivered under my hold—jealousy.

“See what I mean, Echo. Your bear needs the mark too.”

“No shit,” she answered, laughing and pushing me from the room to get dressed.

I threw on a pair of jeans and a button up flannel shirt, rolled up the sleeves and padded down to the office. I was starving but could already sense Tarrow plus River in my office.

“Alpha,” they both greeted with smiles on their faces.

“Good morning.”

“We take it you had an excellent evening.”

“Shut up and get to business,” I said, rolling my eyes at them. I knew they could smell her on me and the lingering hint of pheromones still dancing in the air.

River began, “We need to wait for the Coeur.”

So we talked about insigni
ficant things while we waited—and after only a few minutes she entered, wearing a black and white flowered long dress with some kind of short red sweater thing on top. She was breathtaking all the time, but red definitely suited her.

“Good morning,” she was now shy again in front of them, but it had faded considerably from the days before.

They showed their submission and began the impromptu meeting. River reported a stream of gossip he’d become privy to about the grizzlies—and I knew it was coming eventually. But, I tried very hard not to think of it until the threat was real. Echo had been through enough, and there was no use in worrying over something that may not happen.

“The
grizzlies are claiming that you stole their property,” he fumbled over the word property since they referred to what now was our Alpha female and eons more precious to us than any possession. They spoke of her like we’d stolen one of their ugly couches. “There are rumors about challenging your mate claim and taking her back.”

She sat solid as a rock beside me but I could feel the beat of her heart turn from a constant thump to a rapid hammering.

“She and I will bear the marks after tomorrow night, and we will rush the other rituals. After they are complete, there can be no challenge.” River opened his mouth to argue but I shushed him with a sharp tick of my head.

Tarrow was next, “Alpha, I ask that our Coeur look at the finances of the
clan,” he turned his head in Echo’s direction. “In all honesty, I’ve only been at this job for a month, and I can’t tell heads from tails on some things. With the Alpha present, of course, may I ask for the Coeur’s help?” I could see that my friend, just out of high school and thrust into his position just a month before after our other Beta changed clans, was distressed at his shortcomings.

“Yes, of course. We can do that this afternoon. We all have to get back to work day after tomorrow so it would be best to get as many things straightened out as we can.”

“Thank you, Alpha, Coeur. Wait until you see this shit. Something is truly effed up.”

I dismissed them with a flick of my hand and heard the grumbling of my mate’s stomach.

“I got thrown out of church once for my stomach,” she flushed in embarrassment as we made our way to the kitchen.

“Why?”

“Because it’s so loud. Horace demanded that I leave. And from then on, I didn’t even go back. I was so humiliated.”

“If he’d made sure you were fed properly, he wouldn’t have to worry about it. Breakfast or lunch?”

“Either. I can cook.”

I pecked her on the lips and she looked shocked, “What? You kissed me this morning. Now your lips are fair game.” I ran my thumb along one of the scars on her neck. There were several of them, unnoticeable dots to most. But there were twelve of them all over her neck, mostly in the back where that collar they’d made her wear had burned her fragile neck.

“I just want to drive straight up there and kill him for putting a collar on you like a common dog.”

“Can I come help?”

“No. I will never put you in danger.”

“Kill joy.”

We ate heavy roast beef sandwiches which we’d prepared together and laughed about the crawfish incident.

“Can you take me on a tour? I haven’t seen any of the houses and I want to check out that van.”

I was constantly doing things backwards with my mate. I hadn’t even given her a tour of the clan lands.

“Of course. Put some shoes on, please.” I hadn’t seen her wear shoes ever. She must
have hated them as much as I did. She ran upstairs and came back down with a pair of flip flops on that barely qualified as footwear. But it would have to do.

I opened the door a splice but then closed it right away and turned to her, it couldn’t be helped.

I was almost ashamed at my constant requests of her and my helplessness to restrain myself.

“Can you stay close to me please? I won’t demand that you do, but in the eyes of a single male, you’re still fair game.
I mean you’re not, they know you’re my mate. But the temptation will still be there without being marked.”

I was a fumbling idiot.

She winked at me and smiled, “I am not fair game to anyone except you. I accepted everything that comes with being your mate last night. When we were together as bears, something happened, like everything just fused into place. And I don’t want to be out of your sight any more than you want me out of it. You worry too much.”

“It comes with the job.”

“Of Alpha or mate?”

“Both.”

“No wonder you came after me,” she said.

“What?”

“Looks like you needed me as much as I needed you. I thought it was just me.”

“I think you’re
exactly right,” he answered me. Going to the small table by the front door, he grabbed a folded piece of paper, opened it up and looked at names on it.

“What’s that?”

He cringed, “Proof that I’ve been lack on my duties—a list of all the kids not going to school. There’s a dozen of them.”

Handing it to me, I looked over the names, “There’s ten. I took care of these little beasts yesterday.”

We left and began walking in the direction of some houses.

“Yes, you did. Get ready
, here’s house number one—right here, three doors down from my own home.”

He knocked on the door and I giggled as he tried to hide the fact that he had stepped in front of me to shield me from the danger inside.

“Don’t make fun. I can’t help it.” It was the first time I’d ever seen him blush. It wasn’t on his cheeks, but instead showed on the back of his neck—like it was only for me, hiding from the rest of the world.

“I know. It’s so damned cute. There’s probably a guy in there just waiting to steal my virginity. We have to be careful.”

An older man answered the door with a frail looking woman behind him. She wore an apron and the smells coming from the inside were divine.

“Alpha,” he seemed shocked and bowed us inside.

“Good morning, Blake,” Hawke greeted the man. He shook hands with him, and then I reached out to shake his hand as well. He hesitantly shook my hand in return, and Hawke growled a bit beside me.

This was a way older
man for crying out loud.

“Hawke, I’ve showed more affection stirring a pot of chili.
Simmer down.”

At that, the woman broke into a fit of nervous giggles and clapped Hawke on the back.

“Oh yes, she’ll make a fine one,” the older woman cackled.

“Sorry,” I said to everyone involved.

“Don’t be. You’re right,” Hawke said beside me, laughing.

I hugged the woman
, and she introduced herself as Opal. I followed her into the kitchen and the males sat in the living room.

“You’re so young,” she commented coolly but not rudely.

“I am. I hope I can live up to everyone’s expectations. It’s all a little overwhelming.”

“Have your male tell you of his parents. You may change your mind. From what I’ve seen, you’ve been here three days and have done twice as much as your predecessor.”

“I will. Thank you.”

I watched her place two pans in the oven and then we
joined the men in the living room.

“I just don’t know what to do,” the older man was
distraught. I assumed Hawke breached the subject of the truant child. I sat down next to Hawke and he took my hand.

“Blake’s granddaughter
, Halle, lives here, and they’re having trouble making her go to school. She fakes illness and is very defiant.”

“Why doesn’t she want to go to school?”

Opal answered, “She has told me she gets picked on. They know who gets picked up by the bus here, and they accuse them of being in cult or in some weird church. It seems all of the children are getting bullied.”

“There are laws against that,” Hawke chimed in.

“You’re right, but it’s only against the law if those people get caught. Otherwise it’s their word against ours, and with all the absences, they have the upper hand.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t already know—how many children are in the
clan?”

“Fifty two,” Hawke supplied.

“The wolves,” I looked at Hawke, “not the ones you knew, the ones on the other side—they homeschooled their children. I overheard them talking about being on the line of a different school district, and their children were being mistreated. So they took them all out and homeschooled them. But they had females who were certified teachers.”

Blake popped his head up and bore a stare into Hawke’s face.

“It’s something to discuss, Coeur.”

I nodded, and I didn’t know if what I was going to do next would be called for or not. I was about to make another blunder, I supposed.

“When she gets home this afternoon, can you send her over? I’d like to speak to her. I have some firsthand experience being the odd one out. Maybe I can help her somehow. She may just need someone to talk to.”

“Would that be okay? We just can’t reach her. It’s the difference in age, I suppose.”

“Of course,” Hawke answered for me, “Clan is always more than welcome to come to me for help.”

“It wasn’t always that way,” Blake mumbled.

“I know, and I’m sorry for that. I’m trying desperately to change things around here.”

“Now that we have a
n Alpha pair, it will be easier. I guarantee it.” Opal said confidently.

“I know it will,” Hawke hugged me around my waist.

We left a few minutes afterward and spoke to seven of the ten families on the list. The rest were working and we would have to wait until the night to catch up with them. He showed me everything. I was able to meet B, Flint’s very pregnant wife, and I learned where everyone’s houses were. Hawke’s cell phone rang and it was Tarrow. We’d forgotten about our meet-up with him over the finances.

We arrived at the Alpha house, at some point I hoped to call it home and Tarrow was on the front porch bogged down with papers and he held a laptop on his lap.

Hawke helped him inside, and we sat at the kitchen table. I took the laptop and the written materials and began to see something shady right away. There were two accounts: a clan fund and Hawke’s personal expenses.

“How far does this go back?”

“At least five years, I haven’t looked beyond that.”

I scoured it for an hour, jotting down notes, questions that I had but every month something was happening. Tarrow was wrong, the records went back twenty years and they were in stark contrast to the written records.

“Who was in charge of the finances before Tarrow?” I asked no one in particular.

“His name was Pine
, and his father, Oak, handled them before him. Pine married a girl from the LaFourche clan, and they both moved there shortly after.”

“What is this,” I pointed to a constant payment going out of the
clan’s account.

“It’s the electricity bill, Coeur.”

“How many in the clan?”

“Just under one fifty,” Hawke answered me.

“Is there some machinery or something that I haven’t seen—because this bill is nearly one thousand dollars a month, has been for five years. There were almost the same amount of bears in my old clan and their bill was only six hundred, at the most. Something is going on here. Not to mention this—“I pointed at the screen after isolating a steady five thousand dollars was being paid out to a business every month and had been for over ten years.

“I saw that as well,” Tarrow spoke up. “I called the electricity company last month. They said they sent a
n employee out to check, and our meter was fine. It must be correct.”

“Where is the meter? Did you see them check it?”

“No, Alpha, they said it was off site.”

And the more I picked the records apart, the more I became very suspicious. But I wanted to tread lightly. Walking into a
clan and accusing members or former members of treachery wasn’t something I was ready to do, Alpha’s mate or not.

“Do we have a fax number or an email?”

“Yes,” Tarrow answered and wrote it down on a slip of paper.

“Alpha mine, can I use your phone,” I’d called him
mine
but tried very hard not to make a big deal out of it. I didn’t even know where it came from.

“Of course. Here.”
His smug grin was back in full force.

I’d looked up the number for the power company and called them. I gave them the information but Tarrow ended up having to give permission to speak to me. I asked for a list of all the addresses to every home under the account. Soon, an email came through
, and the first three pages rang true, all clan addresses. I began to close the email, defeated, but Tarrow stopped me.

“There are more, skip ahead.”

I did and after two blank pages, a whole new slew of addresses appeared. They were all in another city.

“Those are LaFourche addresses. You’ve got to be shitting me.”

“There are hundreds, Alpha. You’ve been paying the electric bills for two clans for over ten years.”

We sat in shock and Tarrow reached across me and printed the list.
Hawke bowed in jealousy and I mouthed ‘chili’ at him, knowing he would get my drift. He smiled and backed off. That would have to be our secret word, ‘chili’.

“I will go to the company myself tomorrow, Alpha, on my lunch hour
, and straighten this out.”

“I’ll do it. I wouldn’t want you to spend your lunch hour working.” Hawke intercepted.

“Thank you. They’re going to have to credit us for all those years. We won’t have to pay an electric bill for a decade” The Beta grinned from ear to ear.

I huffed in aggravation,
“That was easy. Now there’s another issue and I’m afraid to ask.”

“Ask anything. You’ve just saved us thousand
s, maybe over a hundred thousand dollars. I didn’t even see it.”

“Well, is there—is there a
clan member who can hack into computers?”

Hawke and Tarrow looked at each other, “Yes, but he’s so far removed. He doesn’t participate in
clan affairs.”

I shut the laptop, frustrated with the constant barriers, “
Clan is clan. There are no degrees of membership. I’m sorry.” I immediately recanted. “I need a break.” I propped my elbows on the table and rested my face in my hands.

“Come back later, Tarrow. I will call Rev and see if he will help us. He just might. My mate needs to eat
, and she has a headache.”

“Yes, Alpha.”

He left immediately and suddenly a bottled water was placed before me.

“You’re thirsty—and hungry
, which is why your head is pounding. How about you and I get out of here, eat, and then come back. I swear you’ve done more in a few days than I have in a year.”

“We should talk about that.”

“About what?” I felt a lightning bolt of fear strike in him.

“About your father. I have the feeling there were some issues. I need to know it all, Hawke.”

“I promise to tell you if you let me take you to eat.”

“Ok, let’s go.”

We hopped in his truck and after meeting some more clan members on our way out, we left the gates and got on the road. I could hear the faint sound of music and I reached to turn the knob. Piano chords flowed through the speakers and he shrugged, “George Winston. Keeps me calm,” he defended.

“There was no music allowed in the other
clan. No TV either. Sounds fantastic to me.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. Some of the kids got in trouble for listening in their cars one time. Horace pulled their radios from their vehicles and burned them. He was a little on the dramatic side.”

He laughed and took my hand in his.
We arrived at a place called Mulatte’s and I wondered if the rumors about Louisiana were true. Was Hawke about to make me eat raccoon or something?

We entered the brightly lit, homey place and sat at a table. I let him order for me since I could neither understand nor pronounce half of the things on the menu.

“I thought he was the best,” Hawke began, “I thought he was the Alpha to set precedence for all other Alphas. Everyone obeyed him. Things seemed fine on the surface. And then he died last year and the more I learned, the more I was buried in the hole he’d left for me. He obviously never checked his accounts. The Principal of the school said he constantly paid fines for clan members who were truant. He was an excellent father, I know that for sure. But did you see Blake’s face when you invited their daughter to see you? Do they not think they are welcome there? I’d like to get to know the clan, really know them. I feel like maybe they were held at arm’s length from me. I have my Betas but when I think about it, we hung out at school but unless I snuck out, we didn’t do very many things together. Maybe it’s just me.”