Breaking Clear (Full Hearts Series Book 3) (35 page)

“Proof?” He muttered, “How the fuck do I . . .” And suddenly it all came together for him.

*     *     *

Harper pulled up in front of the Chevaliers’, having spent the morning trying in vain not to think about Evan. It was Sunday, and Luc was preparing something extra special to celebrate their success at the wedding. The delicious food along with the fun distraction of the kids would be a welcome way to spend the afternoon.

When she arrived, she was greeted by Elliott, who ran to the door with two Nerf guns in hand. “Come on, Auntie Harper! Let’s play!”

Harper grinned at him. “You sure you want to battle me? I used to be with the Navy SEALs. I’m an excellent shot.”

“You were a Navy SEAL?” Elliott asked, letting his arms flop to his sides in shock.

“No, I used to be with the Navy SEALs, as in I dated two of them back to back a few years ago. They taught me some cool stuff.” Harper walked into the kitchen with Elliott in tow. “Let me give this wine to the chef, so I can school you in proper Nerf-warfare techniques.”

Luc greeted her with a kiss on both cheeks. “Bonjour, Harper. Megan is just upstairs changing Amelie. I assume you brought your appetite.”

“You know me so well. Smells delicious in here. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to open a can of whoop-butt on your stepson over here.” Harper looked at Elliott with crazy eyes, causing him to laugh excitedly.

Ten minutes later, their game was interrupted by the doorbell. Elliott ran to the door calling for a truce while Harper reloaded from her position behind the couch. Her heart skipped a beat when she heard Evan’s voice at the door.

“Hey, Elliott. How are you?”

“Good. Auntie Harper and I are having a Nerf-gun war, but you can join! I just have to find my other gun.” He waved Evan in enthusiastically.

“No, I can’t stay, buddy. I’m just here to talk with your auntie for a few minutes.” He walked in, his eyes fixing directly on Harper as she stood up from behind the couch, her fingers gripped around the bright green gun.

She smoothed her now-wild hair with one hand while giving him a serious look. Her heart thumped with fear and longing as she stared at him. Luc and Megan, who had come into the living room to see who was at the door, waved to Evan. Megan, knowing he and Harper needed some time alone, called for Elliott to have some appetizers in the kitchen with them. The expression on her face told her son not to argue.

“Hi. Can we talk for a minute?” Evan asked in a low voice. He had on a blue dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up. His hands were jammed into the front pockets of his jeans and he looked uncomfortable. And gorgeous. Why did he have to be so damn hot? That would definitely make it harder for her to be logical about what her next move should be.

“If you wanted to talk, you probably should have called.”

“I’m sorry. It’s just that I don’t know where you live now, and I really need to do this in person.” He paused, giving her a hopeful look. “Would you be willing to come sit outside with me for a few minutes? I was hoping we could finish our conversation from last night.”

She put the Nerf gun on the coffee table. “Alright.”

Evan nodded and held open the door for her. When Harper walked past him, she caught a whiff of his aftershave. Why did he have to smell so damn good? Fear gripped her again, reminding her that what she had with him would only end in pain. She should say no.

She plunked herself down on the front step, straightening her black jersey-knit top. She would have to be very strong to reject any attempts he was about to make now. That would be her only chance of getting out of this unscathed. She waited until he had settled himself next to her before speaking.

“Look, I only came out here so you don’t embarrass yourself in front of my friends. The answer is no. I’m sorry, but I just can’t do this.” Harper stared straight ahead, letting her gaze fall on a bird that was pecking at something in the grass. It would be dangerous to look at him. Tempting. And she couldn’t let herself be tempted.

“I was worried that you might say that. So there’s nothing I can say that would change your mind?”

“Nothing. We need to leave this in the past. There’s nothing left.” She glanced at him quickly, hoping to gauge his reaction in the split second she would allow herself to look at him.

She wanted to turn away again but his fingers gently touched her cheek, causing her to freeze in place long enough for him to lower his mouth over hers and kiss her. It was that same kiss he had given her the first time. Urgent, passionate, full of longing. She gasped a little and he took advantage, sliding his tongue between her parted lips, searching her mouth for some sign that she might be willing to give him another chance. Getting caught up in him, she kissed him back, matching his passion and desire. When he finally pulled away, Harper was left little more than a puddle. Her eyes stayed closed longer than she intended. Shaking her head a little, she tried desperately to summon her sense of logic.

Evan spoke before she had a chance to refuse him again. “You still so sure that there’s nothing left here? Because it feels like there is.” He challenged her with his words, with his eyes.

“No. You’re wrong. There’s nothing left. You only want what you can’t have. You wanted Avery because you didn’t think you could have her. Then you wanted me because you shouldn’t have me, and once you had me, it didn’t take that long before you were pushing me away. And you know, Evan, I just can’t go down this road with you again, no matter how much I think I want to. I can’t go through that kind of pain twice. So just go. Okay? Please? Take pity on me and just leave me alone so I can get back to forgetting you.”

“I can’t. I’m fully, completely in love with you, Harper. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want us to grow old together. I want a life with you so badly that it hurts to think about it. I need you so much that I would leave everything behind and move to New York or Paris or . . . or Antarctica just to be near you. I want you so badly that I would stand up with the whole world watching and promise that I’ll love you forever. And I would mean it, and I know I could do it, too. If you’d let me, I’d do it.”

Moving onto the steps below her, he was on his knees now in front of her. Gently touching her chin, he guided her face so that she was looking at him directly in the eyes again. “I won’t ever hurt you again, Harper. When you got the job at the magazine, I pushed you away when I should have pulled you close. But I won’t do it again. I was worried that you’d stay for my sake, and I didn’t want to cage you in like that. But I should have told you the truth. That’s I’m in love with you and I wanted you to stay.”

Harper sat quietly, staring into his eyes for a long moment. He was on his knees, making all the promises she’d been too terrified to let herself want to hear. He was saying all the things she had imagined a thousand times in the weeks since they’d parted ways. He was still the same perfectly imperfect man she had always loved, and he had come to find her so that he could declare his undying love. But she just couldn’t accept. This was still too terrifying. He was also still the man who was going to hurt her again if she gave him the chance.

Shaking her head, she said, “You’re just lonely, Evan, and that’s not my problem.” Turning her head from him, she looked down, trying to regain her strength. “The answer is no, Evan. Please go now.”

“So you need proof.”

Proof. Damn it, Luc.
She gave him a doubtful look. “This is something you can’t prove.”

“I can. Come with me. I need to show you something. If it doesn’t prove to you that I want to build a life with you, I’ll accept
no
and leave you alone forever. I promise.”

Harper bit her bottom lip, considering his words. “I can’t just leave. I’m here for supper.”

“They’ll understand.”

Harper struggled with the decision a minute before giving in. “Okay, show me. I doubt it will help, but I’ll see it.”

A wave of relief crossed Evan’s face. “Thank you.” He jumped to his feet, ran up the steps and opened the front door, calling, “I’ll have her back in a bit. Or maybe tomorrow, if she says
yes
.”

Harper glanced back, seeing Luc and Megan standing in the window, arms wrapped around each other, smiling at her.

As she and Evan drove along the road leading out of town and up into the hills, they were both silent. They kept stealing glances at each other, but small talk was impossible.

“I really miss you,” he said finally.

Harper just nodded. She wasn’t going to admit anything. Not yet. When they arrived at Evan’s property, he pulled over by the metal gate. There was a for sale sign hanging on it. Staring out the window, nothing she saw gave her any explanation as to what was going on. He hopped out of the truck and strode around to open her door. He held out his hand as his eyes bored into hers. “I can prove it, Harper. Come with me.”

She took his hand and climbed out of the truck. He pushed the gate open and they walked through the trees.

“I don’t understand. How is you selling this place proof of anything?”

“For a long time, this place was my dream, but before I knew it, it became my dream with you. The house was going to go right where we’re standing, with big windows in every room so we could enjoy that view, and a long, wraparound porch so you could sit out in the rain and just breathe in the scent of it. And there would be no one here to pry or bother us. Just you and me. This was going to be our hideaway from the world. I thought it would be the perfect place to raise a couple of kids, but only if you wanted that too. I thought it would be the perfect place to grow old together. The last time I was up here was the day Blaire called to offer you your job back. I stood here, trying to figure out my life, then I went to the store and bought you this.” Turning to her, he pulled a small black box out of his pocket, placing it carefully in her hand.

“I was all set to bring you here that night and ask you to marry me, but then you got the offer and I figured I should hold off. I couldn’t stand the thought of getting in the way of your dreams, Harper, so I put mine on ice while I waited to see how things would turn out. It was a mistake. I should have told you the truth, but I thought I was doing the right thing. And so I pushed you away. This is my dream for us and without you, I don’t want any of it. A few weeks ago, I finally gave up and I put it up for sale.”

He paused for a moment, seeing her eyes glisten and her face twist up as she fought back tears.

Harper stared at the box she had yet to open. “But you said you’d never get married again.”

“I know, but I was wrong. It was something Luc said on New Year’s Eve that changed my mind. He said that when you find that one person you will always love no matter what, you want the world to know she is yours and that you would do anything for her. For the rest of your life. And more importantly, you want her to know. And then you walked back into the kitchen and I knew in my heart that I’d never be the same again. And I didn’t want to go back to the way things were. I wanted to start my life with you. And I still do, Harper. I’ll always want a life with you. But if you really don’t, I’ll understand and I’ll leave you alone.”

“I want this, Evan,” she whispered through her tears. “I want all of it exactly the way you’ve dreamed it. I’m just so scared of it all.”

Evan wrapped her in his arms and pulled her close. “I know, but there’s nothing to fear anymore. Because this is real and I’m not going anywhere. Ever. When you start feeling scared, you tell me. We’ll figure it out together, okay? I’ll always pull you in. I promise.”

Lifting his hands to her face, he lowered his mouth to hers. Kissing her gently, carefully. His kiss was a question. Would she marry him? Would she spend the rest of her life with him? And her kiss was the answer. Yes. She would stay. She would stay forever.

Wrapping her in his arms, he lifted her up and spun her around as they smiled and laughed, their lips meeting again. Their embrace contained all of the passion and yearning and love and lust that was them together. It stopped time for a moment and then started it back up again, so that they could begin their life together. The life they would share that wasn’t going to end.

“I’m going to love you forever, Harper.”

“I’m so glad, because I’m going to love you forever too, Evan.”

“Wait, I have one more thing for you.” He pulled a small gift out of his jacket pocket. “I thought I should have one more piece of proof in case you needed it.”

Harper took it and unwrapped it carefully. It was her diary from when she was a teenager, the one that had
Harper Donovan
and
Evan-from-Heaven
written on every page.

“Your dad helped me find it. It was in a box in his basement. Open it to the back page.”

Inside he had written:

Harper,

I know I’m late, but sometimes saving the best for last is the only way to know it when you see it. You are my best. You are my everything.

I promise I will love you forever,

Evan

Harper threw her arms around his neck, kissing him with abandon as tears streamed down her face. They stayed like that for a long time under the warmth of the late spring sun.

For the first time, Harper was absolutely certain that she could be herself anywhere, even in a place where everyone knew about her past. She could be the successful, passionate, creative woman she was, here. She was surrounded by the truth as much as she was blanketed by the love and acceptance of her family. And the past wouldn’t control her fate ever again. She would. She would live a life rich in dreams of her own making, and best of all, rich in love.

Her heart belonged here with Evan. He would shelter it from the world if she ever needed him to. He would build a solid, true home for her heart in his. And she would do the same for him.

Evan pulled back a little and smiled at her, his face full of adoration. “Should we go home?”

“We are home.”

Breaking Clear