Borrowing Trouble (10 page)

              “And there are plenty who will.” Jay smiled, loving Landon’s lack of ever sugar coating things.

              “I’m not much further along yet, Landon. I won’t lie. I’m doing my best here, but it’s when I’m with you that I’m at my best.” The way Landon lit up at that made Jay feel so good inside it hurt. “But when you’re not here, I’m out in the woods without a compass and it’s cloudy.” Jay shook his head. “I have to thank you, mostly, because I know this isn’t easy, but I appreciate how you aren’t pressuring me. It’s keeping me from retreating back into that place, just yet.” Jay stopped. He really couldn’t beat this conversation in the ground anymore, so he hoped Landon took those words as sincerely as he’d meant them.

              Jay definitely had some guilt he was working through, on top of everything, because he couldn’t remember a moment, even a small one, where he’d pushed to give Bethany half the peace of mind he offered to Landon.

              “Oh, Jay. I do understand. I won’t say it’s any easier on me, but I guess I’m not done here yet.”

              Jay leaned forward, briefly kissing Landon chastely on the lips before going back to his side of the deck. He still felt the ghost of Landon’s warmth on his lips as he smiled to himself. “Way I see it,” Jay began, “we do this just like if I was seeing a woman.” He didn’t even respond to the rude noise Landon made. “I wouldn’t introduce her as someone I’m dating until I knew we were very serious, especially since Millie is still adjusting to the split. I’m not that kind of man.” He turned to Landon. “And I definitely might want to know how to explain the whole
man
thing to myself before I can wrap my head around telling my kids. Or my ex.”

              He groaned inwardly at the thought of all of that.

              Enough of that conversation. All of it.

              He thought of something he’d been meaning to ask. He figured it beared considering since it was a factor in all of … this, whatever this was. “Landon, what do you want to do in life?”

              Landon was silent long enough, Jay turned to check on him. Landon’s brows were scrunched in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, do you want to keep working for Petty Mill, or do you want to use your big boy education?”

Landon smiled serenely after a moment. “I want to teach. Always have wanted to.”

Jay blinked, tilted his head. Then he returned Landon’s smile. “I think you’d be a mighty fine teacher. You’re so patient. Easy to talk to.”

Landon’s cheeks tinted, a flush of pride, not embarrassment. “Thanks. That… from you, it’s nice to hear.” Jay felt his own cheeks flush at that. Yeah, it was likewise nice to be held in someone’s high regard when he had so much respect and… adoration for them. He could admit it. He’d come to adore Landon in a way he couldn’t yet understand or put into words. But by god, he hoped he could figure it out sooner rather than later, because he felt like happiness was just dancing at his fingertips.

Chapter 14

At some point that night after coming in from working on the deck, their watching tv on the couch had gone from them sitting on opposite ends and eating sandwiches, to leaning against one another and drinking a beer. It hadn’t taken long for even that leaning shoulder-to-shoulder to evolve into making out.

Landon hadn’t necessarily expected to get laid that night. Sometimes after big conversations like that, Jay was more about just the act of touching, rather than getting off. Landon could understand it. For all that this sucked for Landon’s wary heart trying not to get attached, Jay had a whole life change to adjust to.

But Landon would admit, while he was a patient man, his dick was no such thing. So when Jay’d pulled Landon between his legs and gripped his ass, Landon had breathed a sigh of relief. They’d started with a slow grinding of their clothed cocks, then when Jay’d made sure the blinds were drawn, they were naked in short order and touching every inch of skin they could get their hands on.

Jay’s enthusiasm was fun. While some things he did with the sexual knowledge of any man who’d had sex with anyone, some of the new things, he fumbled with. But his enthusiasm and near teenaged excitement for each new experience was heady.

The way he fucking worshipped Landon’s body, made love to it like it might disappear on him, always left Landon not only sated, but feeling cherished. That was just as new to Landon as any of this was for Jay.

“Landon?” Jay asked into their kisses. Landon kept steadily stroking their cocks together where he’d trapped them in his lubed hands. That’d been the one thing he’d been daring enough to employ, lube. He figured it’d at least make the frotting more interesting. And perhaps it’d ease the way into eventually, maybe one day, talking about going further.

“Yeah?”

Jay rolled them over until Landon was on top, straddling him. The position was awesome because he could look down at Jay, take in his powerful shoulders and his lightly furred chest and tummy. He loved how Jay didn’t have the stomach of a teenage muscle head. He had an honest, working man’s build, complete with a slightly doughy stomach. But he was all power and built to go for hours, strong and sure.

“I want to try fucking. At least once,” Jay stated.

Landon stilled his hands, though Jay continued fucking up into his joined fists.

“Jay, we don’t have to, you know. It’s not like a gay test.”

Jay stopped moving and gripped Landon’s waist firmly. “I’m not worried about that. I want to fuck you, Landon. So bad. You have no idea. It’s like it’s just… not fucking enough, touching you like this.” Jay leaned up on his elbows and kissed Landon frantically. “This is great, this is perfect. But, if you like it, I really want to fuck you.”

Jay winced. “Unless you’re really not into it. Then I understand.”

Landon shook his head, slowly. Wasn’t this a day full of surprises? Hell, Jay was full of surprises. From that quiet, simple man he’d first seen in his parents’ kitchen to this almost daring, open Jay he had underneath him now, Landon was a little light headed from his wanting.

“I’d love to, I guess I just didn’t think you’d want…”

“Landon,” Jay said, then kissed him sweetly. “I want everything I can have with you while I can.”

Landon could have done without the last few words Jay’d added to that thought, but for now, he wanted this. He wanted Jay and Jay wanted him, and Landon couldn’t believe it because he’d really thought this moment was too much to hope for.

“Fuck. Jay, I didn’t exactly bring condoms with me. I hoped we’d eventually discuss doing this, but… I didn’t figure we would.”

Jay reached up and grabbed Landon’s face. “Are you clean?”

“What? Of course I am,” Landon said, a little offended. Then he got it, eyes going wide. “Jay, that’s… kinda big.”

Jay flexed, making his cock jump where Landon still held it. “Thanks for noticing.”

Landon laughed out loud. “Not that, you jackhole. I meant… going bare.”

“Landon, it’s us, just us. I know this is a little from being drunk on you, but I want all of you, if it’s safe. I
know
I am. I haven’t… with anyone… and my last stuff was all…” Jay seemed embarrassed to admit that. Landon realized that meant he would only be the second person Jay’d had sex with
ever
. Holy shit.

“Jay, I haven’t been with anyone in… well, it’s been a long time. I’m clean. But,” he looked at Jay carefully. “You’re sure?”

“We can just keep on with our hands if you want,” Jay said. “I don’t want to—”

“No, I guess I’m just surprised, is all.”

Jay smirked. “I like keeping you on your toes.”

Landon dropped down and devoured Jay’s smiling mouth, pinching his nipples. They rubbed against each other like that for a while until Landon reached between them and pushed Jay’s cock behind him, fitting it in the crack of his ass. He chuckled into the kiss when Jay groaned as Landon started rubbing his ass, his hole up and down Jay’s cock.

Shivers raced up and down his body with each pass of Jay’s fat cockhead over his entrance and Landon’s body
craved
having Jay inside him. This would, in fact, be his first time to ever go bare with a man. He’d only done anal a handful of times, always with guys he’d dated however briefly, but they’d never made it to the stage where he trusted them to go bare. This, this was a big fucking deal. But he did trust Jay. Even if it’d break his heart in the end, he wanted the same thing Jay did; he wanted all of Jay, and to give Jay all of him. Even if just for tonight.

Landon leaned up and instructed Jay to hold out his hand. Jay did as he was told and Landon puddled lube in his palm. “Now, cover your cock in it.” Jay’s eyes were glassy from the pleasure as he worked his own cock with the lube.

“Gimme your hand again, Jay.” Jay complied, and Landon poured more in his palm. “Now do the same thing, only make sure your fingers are good and slick, too.” Jay looked at him questioningly. “You’re gonna lube me up. Get me ready.”

Jay started trembling much like he did the first time Landon had blown him. He couldn’t believe it was only a week ago. He felt like he could tell you so much about the man, and he could certainly tell you every point on Jay’s body to get him off the fastest. Seemed impossible they’d covered that much sexual ground in so short a time. But honestly, the emotional side, that’d begun the first night they sat down and had a few beers at Woody’s.

Jay started circling Landon’s hole with his fingers, timidly pressing his shaking fingers against the ring. “God, so tight, Landon.”

“Wait’ll it’s your dick, babe.” He pushed back against Jay’s fingers. He loved the flare in Jay’s eyes when he’d called Jay babe. Landon wasn’t much for pet names, but hey, if it did it for Jay, he’d call the man
snookums
. “Gimme your fingers. Please.” Jay did.

Landon dropped his head to Jay’s chest when the first thick, calloused finger’s burning entrance was complete. “You’re so hot inside, so tight,” Jay said reverently. Jay started fucking his finger in slowly, then added a second. Jay wasn’t a complete novice with this then, Landon figured, but he did not want to get into thinking about Jay and his ex’s sex habits right at that moment. Or ever.

Leaning up, palms on Jay’s chest, Landon pushed down onto the two fingers invading him and Jay gave them a twist, his smile turning devious as he watched Landon’s face. Lord knows how it looked at that point.

“Fuck, that’s enough. I need you, now,” Landon moaned breathily.

“Thank fuck for that.”

“Your mouth has gotten filthy, Mr. Hill.” Landon met Jay for a tongues-out, mouth licking kiss.

“You’re a bad influence, young Petty-wan.”

Landon groaned and burst into laughter. “Oh my god, that was so lame!” They both laughed, but the laugh turned into a moan as Jay took himself in hand, patted Landon’s hole once, twice with the head, then pushed in. Landon sat back, head lolling as he moaned loudly, sinking down on Jay, inch by painfully pleasurable inch.

They sat, breathing loudly, eyes closed and lost in their personal pleasure for a moment. When Landon opened his eyes, he reached to run a thumb over Jay’s bottom lip that he’d sucked in. Jay took Landon’s thumb in his mouth and bit down lightly. Landon let out another moan, then moved his feet to either side of Jay’s waist. That was all he needed to get the right leverage, hands on Jay’s stomach, to pull himself up to having just the head of Jay’s cock in him, then dropping back down.

“God, fuck, Landon, so fucking tight.” Landon didn’t even have it in him to make fun of Jay for saying “tight” again.

Landon started riding Jay, loving the way Jay’s eyes roamed over his body, then down to where they were joined. Landon slid his hands under him to feel where Jay’s cock was moving in and out of him.

Jay sat up abruptly and sucked Landon’s bottom lip in, wrapping his big arm around the small of Landon’s back and started thrusting his hips up. Landon gripped Jay’s shoulder with one hand and his own cock with the other, holding on for the brutal fucking Jay was giving him. God, knowing Jay was bare in him was such a turn on, he didn’t know if he’d last. This really was just them, together.

When Landon looked in Jay’s eyes, he saw not only desire there, but a look full of that almost innocent fascination. He could wholly relate. There was something so intense about the moment, the way Jay trembled, the way their bodies touched in so many ways. This wasn’t just fucking, but had it ever been with them?

“Oh, mother—” Landon’s head fell back on a yelp of intense pleasure. “Oh, fuck right there, Jay.”

Jay seemed surprised. “There’s…”

“Prostate,” Landon sang, silly-like. Jay laughed and kept angling his dick up. He didn’t peg it every time, but Landon’s prostate got enough prods to make his whole fucking body feel like his nerves were shorting out.

“Shit, I’m gonna cum, Jay.”

“Yes, cum for me,” Jay begged, burying his head in Landon’s neck, thrusting up. Landon started helping, fucking himself down on Jay’s cock, and they both made pitiful, gasping whimpers as they both got close.

“Oh, fuck me,” Jay cried out. “I’m gonna cum. Right now.”

Landon clamped as hard as he could to help milk Jay’s cock and stroked himself harder. And within a few strokes, Jay let out a cry, his cock making those tell-tale jerks inside Landon. “Oh, I’m cumming. I’m cumming inside you,” Jay sigh-grunted into Landon’s neck before biting down lightly.

The feel of Jay’s biting, his release, knowing Jay was filling him, marking him inside, Landon’s cock erupted, shooting between them as his riding of Jay’s cock became clumsy and eventually stilled.

“Oh, fuck, Jay.” He fell backward, Jay’s cock sliding out of him.

He lay breathing heavily for a moment before looking up to check on Jay. He half expected Jay to be a little freaked out. But the pleased, almost predatory look on Jay’s face as he stared at Landon’s ass was disconcerting.

“You okay?”

Jay shook his head in disbelief and came up Landon, kissing his pelvis, then just above his belly button, and up his chest. Eventually, he made it to lying bodily on top of Landon, kissing his mouth with everything he had, leaving Landon breathless.

“I take it you enjoyed yourself?”

“Are you kidding?” Jay asked with the enthusiasm of a teenager. “That was the hottest thing ever.” Landon couldn’t help snickering. Which turned into a moan when Jay reached and ran a hand over his sensitive hole. “Especially seeing my cum there.” Jay dipped his finger in and Landon’s head pushed back into the couch cushion.

“Figured you’d think that was gross.”

“Hell, me too.” Jay shrugged. “Usually do, only… slightly different orifice.”

Landon shoved Jay, making gagging sounds. “Oh, god, please don’t make me think about vaginas right now!”

Jay huffed a laugh and returned to kissing Landon.

***

Jay’s cock was still a semi as they crawled into his bed that night. He didn’t know what had come over him. He became such a fiend around Landon, and things he hadn’t imagined turning him on before got his skin hot and tight. He had never been the type to just hang around after sex, reveling in the naughtiness of it, enjoying the staking of his claim on another person’s body. And damn, didn’t that thought bring him up short.

The water shutting off in the bathroom reminded him there was another person who’d sleep in his bed; and that was comforting, for once. Yes, early on in his marriage, he’d loved having another person to touch base with, knowing someone who cared for him, that he cared for, was a constant. But that’d dissipated, certainly in the last four or so years of their marriage. It was officially the first time Landon would stay over with him. Aside from their first hand jobs, Landon had typically gone home later at night, but this time, Jay’d wanted him to stay.

Jay still felt a sense of awe at just how different it’d been being with Landon. There wasn’t hours of work just to cum, there was a connection he didn’t even know could exist. He hadn’t gotten what sex could be, other than a pleasant way to spend a bit of time.

Tonight, physically, emotionally, he was sated.

Even knowing Landon had been filled with Jay had come with its own kinky, but bone-deep satisfaction that was wholly novel to Jay. It was like that back room in his brain, the fluorescent lights weren’t just flickering anymore; whole sections were starting to become completely lit. And Jay’s heart ached with it in good ways and bad.