Black & Ugly as Ever (14 page)

Smokes was sitting in his house watching his kid run around the kitchen. He was waiting for his mother to pick him up because being around a busy three year old wasn’t something he was trying to do right now.

“So what’s the hold up?” Ace, his Dominican connect asked over the phone. “We waited long enough.”
“I know, but I’m gettin’ ready to move on it now. You gotta give me some time.”
“Well you ain’t got no more time” he reminded him. “I’m sure you dry out there by now.”
Ace was right, unless he got Parade to get on that plane he wouldn’t be able to run his business. Ace was instrumental. Not only did he supply him with the best dope to keep his operation running smoothly, he gave it to him at a good price. All Smokes had to do was convince naive unsuspecting woman to make the trip to the Dominican Republic. Once there, they’d be sold into sex slavery. Smokes had been involved in this line of business for the past ten years. American women were exotic over there and went for much more.
“She’ll be there,” Smokes said seriously. “If I have to bring her there myself.
“That’s what I wanted to hear.”
When Smokes hung up on him, he called Zeeway. Ever since he’d been home, he’d been using him to handle all of his dirty work. And tonight he wanted to talk to him about another job.
“Zeeway, make your way over here. And quick. We have a lot to discuss.”
“I’m on my way now.”

The longer we drove to our destination, the more beautiful things became. Jay had taken me to a gorgeous rental home in Deep Creek, Maryland. I never knew Maryland had places like this. The mountains were large and sat in the backdrop like a beautiful painting. And when we entered the cabin style house, it had a smooth country appeal. It was far more relaxing than anything I’d been around in my entire life.

“Sit down at the kitchen table, baby,” he said as he ran back to the car returning with four bags. When I tried to help him he refused so I sat down and my legs shook nervously.

“Just relax and let me do this.” He unpacked all of the bags alone.
“Why are you doing all of this, Jay? I’m not use to you treating me like this and I don’t know how to handle it.”
“I’m doing this because I was wrong for how I treated you.” He gazed into my eyes. “So tonight don’t ask why, just go with the flow. Aight?”
I nodded yes.
“I got you,” he winked. “So put on that bathing suit you brought and meet me on the balcony.”
“The balcony?”
“Just do it,” he demanded. “it’s back there.”
I disappeared into the rental home stealing a look at the scenery. I was comfortable and couldn’t wait to see what he had in store. Once in the bathroom, I slid into my black bathing suit with silver rhinestones and looked at myself in the mirror. I liked what I saw so I smiled. For the first time in a long time I felt comfortable and sexy. I wasn’t sure if it was the buzz I had going or anxiousness. I ran my hand through my bob style haircut, and struck a pose.
“I’m gonna make him realize how much he needs me tonight,” I said to myself.
Sliding into my black high heels, I seductively walked to the balcony. My mouth dropped when I saw the Jacuzzi running with rose pedals moving throughout. On the side was a bottle of Ace of Spades champagne chilling in a silver ice bucket. It was dark but I could still see the leaves on the trees moving in the warm breeze. This was the most romantic thing he’d ever done for me.
“Damn, Parade,” he said looking at my body. “You’re sexy as shit! I must’ve been trippin’ when I let you go.”
Hearing him say that made me feel warm inside. Kicking my shoes off, I exposed my manicured feet and slowly eased into the water. The bubbles tickled my body. Then I moved in front of him and wrapped my arms around his neck. His curly hair was wet and clinged to his scalp. Jay was the finest man I’d ever seen in my life. And tonight he was all mine.
“You’re fine as hell,” I told him pressing my body against his.
“You know you gonna be mine right?” he asked me as our bodies floated underneath us.
I remained silent.
“I’m not gonna play this game long with you and dude, but after everything I put you through.” He continued. “I know you gotta find out on your own what type of nigga he is first. And I’m willing to work at it Parade, but I ain’t gonna wait forever. Pretty soon you gonna have to make a decision on who you want. Me or him…straight up.”
Instead of speaking I just pressed my lips against his. Everything about right now felt good. It felt right and I didn’t want to spoil it with verbal details. When I felt his fingers running over my body my heart raced in anticipation of being with him again. Sexually and mentally.
“I want you,” I said kissing him passionately. “Now.”
When I said that I felt him move the seat of my bathing suit over and ease into me slowly. The water pushing us softly didn’t take away from how he felt. Ummmmmm. My mouth remained open until he pushed everything he had into my wetness. The water bubbles danced around us.
“Damn you feel so fuckin’ good, Parade!” He held my waist. “I miss this shit.”
“You too, baby. You feel so good.”
I slowly began to wind my hips in small circles. My stomach felt tingly as he remained in control of my waist and met my pumps with each motion I made. The last time I had sex with Jay, he was cold and heartless. Now it was passionate and sweet. Removing my breasts from my bathing suit he sucked my nipples softly. I bit my bottom lip as the warmth from his tongue circled my nipples. They immediately hardened in his mouth. In all of the times we’ve been together, Jay has never sucked my breasts. And he was so damn good at it.
“Don’t stop, Jay…please!”
“I ain’t gonna stop hittin’ this shit until you remember the nigga I am. You mine, Parade Knight. You my, lady.”
In and out. Over and over, Jay consistently hit the right spots. Although the lovemaking was on point, for some reason I wanted more. And since he was working overtime to show me he was a changed man, I knew it would be on me to spice things up.
“Jay, stop bullshittin’ and fuck this pussy!”
He looked at me like he finally saw me for the first time. And with his eyes, he agreed with me. But what he did next I didn’t expect. He lifted me out of the water and sat me on the edge of the Jacuzzi. I was a little chilly at first until he moved my bathing suit aside and ran his tongue around my clit.
In my entire life, no man had ever eaten my pussy and I didn’t realize how good it felt. I heard people talk about it, but never knew it would feel this good. Every part of me was sensitive as he sucked on my throbbing clitoris. I couldn’t hold back. I grabbed the back of his head and unconsciously pushed my wetness toward his face. His tongue strokes didn’t stop until he sucked ever last drop of my oil. My body shivered as I looked at him.
“Oh my, gawd!”
He gently pulled me back into the water and said, “I’m not done with you yet. “I’m about to fuck this pussy up!” He began going in and out of me roughly. The oily residue from my last climax allowed him to enter me with extreme ease. “I’ma leave my mark on this pussy.”
My entire body tingled from my toes to nipples. I was open, and knew it. There was no way I could go on with marrying Smokes or living with him for that matter. I wanted out. But what was I gonna do? I knew first hand the kind of man he could be. After all, he had my best friend Sky killed and promised to kill Jay if I saw him again. All I knew was this, if I had to lay down my life to be with Jay, then it was a chance I was willing to take. Cause living without him anymore, would already make me want to die.

I need to stop this shit but I don’t know how. Nothing about my life makes sense anymore and I don’t know what to do. And I can’t call the one person I know cares about me because I messed up.

“You’re beautiful,” the trick said as I lay in his bed, with him on top of me. His wife was at work. I waited in his basement for two hours in the dark, and the moment she hit the door, he snuck me upstairs. On my way up, I noticed family pictures dressed the walls. His family was beautiful and still he wasn’t satisfied. What I wouldn’t give for a life like this. “I didn’t know you were so beautiful.”

I smiled. I would give him credit for being nicer than most tricks but I didn’t understand his reason. I felt like I didn’t deserve such kindness. I was a whore and whores are supposed to be used. Still I couldn’t get over how handsome he was. More handsome than I would think a trick would be. I mean, he could get anybody he wanted, so why me? His light brown eyes and honey brown skin was perfect, and his build was muscular, sexy and he smelled good.

Rubbing his hands on my face, he looked deeply into my eyes. This was weird but his touch caused me to melt. The only thing that fucked this moment up was the smell of the condom. It made me nauseous at first. Certain smells irritated me. Pushing the scent out of my mind, I imagined this was my home, and that I was carrying his baby. I even tried to push out of my mind that he had a fetish for pregnant woman who were showing. He said something about our pussies being tigher the further along in the pregnancy we were. And since I couldn’t fuck myself, I had no idea if it was true or not, so I took his word for it.

Easing into my body, he sucked on my bottom lip lightly. He was making love to me and it felt so good. I knew what this was all about. Money. Still, I decided to enjoy myself. I needed his attention right now. I needed to feel like a lady, even if the man on top of me was not mine. A light smile spread across my face until he bit my lip so hard my body tensed up and I screamed in his face.

“Shut the fuck up, bitch!” he stole me in my jaw. “You know you like this shit don’t you!” He hit me with a closed fist again. “Whores like you love this kind of shit and you ain’t no different!”

I saw my blood fall on his lip and he wiped it off. Where am I? What’s going on? Who is this man on top of me? When I looked up at him, I remembered that he had just hit me. He stole me so hard, that for a brief moment, I lost memory.

“I’m sorry,” he said softly lightly touching my face again seeing my tears. His strokes harder and harder inside of me. It was like he was getting off on what he was doing. He went from crazy to nice instantly. “I didn’t mean to hit you so hard. Are you okay?”

Tasting my own blood and feeling my baby kick wildly I still managed to lie. All I wanted was to get out of this house safely along with my money. Because after this, I was gonna have to get high. And if God helped me just this one time, I promised myself that I’d never get in this position again. Fear set in when I realized I’d made many promises to the Lord and kept none of them.

“I’m fine.” He continued to rape me. “I’m okay, really. I just got to go home.”
“Good. I’m glad you’re okay.” He rubbed my face again before his hands found their way on my throat. He squeezed and squeezed some more.
As he choked me I tried my best to fight him, my baby too. We were both fighting for our lives. Not being able to breathe was petrifying. He continued to rape me while he prevented oxygen from entering my body. And then I felt light. I felt this feeling before when I had my own apartment and someone I trusted broke in. No longer able to defend myself, I gave in to the feeling. Sure I’d been in the worst kind of trouble since fucking with heroin, but this was different. I wanted to die. I wanted to leave the hell I lived in daily. I welcomed death with open arms. Tell Miss Wayne and Parade I love them. Please.
When I felt water on my face I thought I was dreaming until I could feel him going in and out of me. I’m still here? I’m still alive? I had hoped he wouldn’t torture me anymore. I had hoped he’d be done and I’d be in heaven but I wasn’t.
“That’s right, beautiful, get up. I’m not half done with you yet.” He said licking his lips. “I’ma get my full moneys worth from your beautiful whore ass. I love fuckin’ whores like you. You shouldn’t be walking around passing out good pussy. Somebody got to take it. Somebody got to put you in your place. That’s my job.”
“Please let me go,” I cried. “Please…I just want to go home.” Without waiting he hit me so hard in the face, I felt my skull move. This was the scariest situation I had ever been in, in my life and I didn’t see a way out. For the next few hours, he continuously choked me and brought me back to consciousness. And each time, I hoped I wouldn’t wake up but every time I did.