Bittersweet (13 page)

Alex just smirked at her as she shouted.

“Jenna, I can explain.” Tyler rushed forward and grabbed for her, but she pushed him away and walked out of the room as fast as she could. It was either that or knock someone out, and she couldn’t risk the harm to her unborn child.

She ran down the stairs but tripped over her feet when he caught up to her and landed face-first on the bottom step.

Tyler rushed to her aid as she cried out in pain, but she kept pushing him away, disgusted with herself and him. She made it outside only to collapse on the front lawn. She couldn’t walk anymore.

Alex watched from a window upstairs. Her face lit up with a smile as she looked down at Jenna and Tyler. Then Tyler’s worried face hovered over her as he whispered, “I am so sorry.”

She woke up with a gasp and bolted upright to caress her stomach.

“Looks like I missed an amazing recital.” Tyler was sitting at the end of the couch and looked away from the TV toward her.

“You did.”

He moved closer, but she inched away. “Jenna, I had every intention of being there. It’s just—”

“I’m not in the mood to argue tonight. My parents are in the spare room, and I’m tired of it.” She sighed before covering her face. She was exhausted from all of the stress, period. “You picked your priorities, Tyler, and now we all have to deal with the consequences.”

He picked up flowers from the coffee table and tried to hand them to her, but she didn’t want them. If that was his apology, he could keep it. She wasn’t joking when she’d said she was tired. He literally drained her sometimes, making her numb to his advances, and it only got worse the longer it carried on.

“I am so sorry,” he whispered, and she shivered as she thought about her recent dream. “I screwed up. What else do you want me to say?”

“What else?” She looked away to wipe away a tear and didn’t bother to answer the stupid question. “I agree. You are sorry, Tyler, but there’s a little boy upstairs who needs that apology more than I do. He was so disappointed.”

He nodded and stood. “Can I make this up to you?” He moved his face closer to kiss her, but she backed away from his advances and turned her head away.

“You could start by getting your priorities straight from now on,” she said and caressed her stomach again. “There’s a pillow and a blanket down here for you. If there isn’t anything else, I’m going to bed.”

He stared after her in shock when she walked away. This was the first time she’d ever refused his advances and definitely his first time sleeping on the couch. Jenna usually talked things through when she was upset, but she hoped he realized how much he’d screwed up this time. She knew exactly what he meant when he asked if he could make things up to her. He wanted sex, and for the first time, she really wasn’t in the mood. The thought of him touching her after being with Alex gave her the chills.

No time like the present
, she thought as she stopped at the stairs and turned around to give him the news. “I went to the doctor today, by the way,” she started, admiring his shocked expression. He knew nothing about it. He didn’t know anything that went on in his own home anymore, and it was sad as hell.

“Are you all right?” He actually looked concerned and took a step toward her.

“Yes, Tyler, but it looks like I’ll be going on a regular basis again for the next few months. It turns out I’m pregnant. Congratulations, Daddy.” It should have been much happier news than it felt like at the moment. She wasn’t even excited yet and felt so alone for the first time in her marriage. It was unsettling.

“What?”

“You heard me.” She walked upstairs and didn’t bother to look back.

Their situation needed to change, and it was up to him to figure out exactly what he wanted before it was too late.

Chapter Seventeen

Brady was back. They sat on a porch swing, and he held her close while quietly listening as she unburdened herself from all of her worries.

“I’m sorry, love.” His sexy accent was so soothing.

“Why are you apologizing?” she asked, startled because he’d done nothing but give her his support. He was damn near perfect, her dream man.

“Because ye’r hurtin’, love, and I can’t stand it.” He cradled her head against his chest, and she listened to the steady beat of his heart.

“Wow,” she whispered in awe. “Are you sure you’re for real? That you actually exist?”

His answer started with a kiss, and the butterflies stirred crazily in her stomach while moisture flowed in the area even lower as his tongue stroked in and out, making love to her mouth. “Believe me, love, ye’ll soon find out.”

The dream was so good that being pulled away from it felt like fingernails on a chalkboard or like a record being scratched to bits.

“Mommy, Mommy,” Jayden cheered while he jumped up and down beside her on the bed. “Wake up, sleepyhead.”

“Good morning to you too.” She pulled him down with a groan and tickled him until he screeched for mercy.

“Grandma has breakfast ready. Come on.” He wiggled away, hopped off the bed, and raced out in no time.

“Hey, Mom, are you and Dad still okay to watch Jayden for a little while today?” She called out as she followed her son into the kitchen. Breakfast smelled delicious as she sat down at the table, but with her nauseous state she stuck with toast and grimaced as she pushed her eggs away. “He’ll have to be dropped off by 12:45 and then picked up from school at 3:15.”

“What appointment might this be?”

“Very subtle, Mom.” Jenna laughed. “It’s just another doctor’s appointment.” She shrugged. Her overprotective mother’s concern was endearing.

“Of course I’ll watch Jayden, dear. Is there anything wrong?”

“No, I’m fine, really. I wasn’t feeling very well, and they ran some tests.” Before she could finish talking, her mother was checking her head for a temperature. “Not there.” She grabbed her mother’s hands and placed them on her stomach. “Here. I’m pregnant again. Congratulations, Grandma.”

Her mother let out a big whoop of excitement that made her father run in from the other room looking concerned.

“Hey, Dad,” Jenna said, laughing.

“She’s pregnant!”

“Congratulations, honey.” And they laughed again while her mother did a happy dance in the middle of a kitchen while clapping her hands joyfully.

Jenna took a quick peek at Jayden while he stood there wide-eyed and scared. Probably because of the way her mother was reacting. She called him over and lifted him in her arms. “It’s okay, honey. Grandma’s just crazy sometimes.”

“Grandma, you’re crazy,” Jayden repeated, and they all laughed in unison.

Her appointment that morning was for a sonogram, and with Jayden taken care of she could make a much-needed stop afterward, one she had to make alone. She had to see Tyler, and she wasn’t about to wait until he came home again. It was time she paid him a visit at work.

***

With a heart rate of 130 beats per minute, this tiny person inside her actually looked like a baby already. The doctor estimated the gestational age to be about eleven weeks.

Jenna became emotional yet again upon seeing the baby moving around on the screen. She couldn’t stop smiling. She could see all the fingers and toes and a cute little button nose. She was still awestruck when they handed her the very first picture of her baby afterward, but it soon turned to worry about what she was about to do.

She arrived at Tyler’s law office feeling nervous. It’d been a while since she’d visited, and the last time she’d pictured it wasn’t a very pleasant memory.

“Can I help you?” asked the plump redheaded receptionist, interrupting her thoughts.

“No, thank you. I’m here to visit my husband, and I can find my own way.”

She proceeded past the desk and stopped abruptly just before she reached his office. A flashback came to mind of a calendar with the twenty-first circled boldly in red when she saw the notice for the staff Christmas party.

“Get it together, Jenna,” she mumbled, willing her hands to stop shaking. She needed as much courage as she could get right now. God only knew what Tyler was thinking when it came to her and the pregnancy. Lord, what she wouldn’t give to be able to turn back time right now. These dreams, premonitions, or whatever you wanted to call them were frightening enough. The similarities between them and reality scared the living daylights out of her. The added stress of Tyler’s avoidance was torture and hurtful on top of everything else. There just wasn’t much more she could take.

Peeking through his partially closed door, she saw that Alex was with him again. She was sitting on the corner of his desk laughing and leaned close to him as he mumbled something.

They didn’t notice when she walked in, so she cleared her throat. “Did I come at a bad time?” The first thing she noticed was Alex’s hand on his. Flashbacks from her dreams hit her in quick glimpses, temporarily blinding her.

When she could see again, Tyler ripped his hand away from underneath Alex’s and moved away. “Of course not, honey, we were just about to take a break anyway.”

Clearly disappointed, Alex hopped off his desk and straightened her skirt “Hello, Jenna.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me. Nothing’s going on, all right,” Jenna snapped, looking between the two of them. Why wouldn’t they just fess up and lay it all out there? If Tyler wanted Alex, Jenna certainly wasn’t about to stick around.

“Jenna, don’t be silly. Alex is just a coworker, nothing more.”

With a gasp and a dirty look, Alex quickly walked out, leaving the two of them to speak alone.

“Right, Tyler, and in case you’re wondering, I’m being sarcastic. Figure out what it is that you want and then let me know. I’m tired of not knowing, and if it’s not me, then just say it and stop this torture.”

“Come on, Jenna, this is just silly.”

“Silly?” She couldn’t believe it. “I’m being silly. Okay, I’ll play along. Do you actually think I’m that stupid? There’s something going on with the two of you. Now the question that has me curious is just how far you’ve gone.” The stress was too much. She hadn’t originally planned to confront him about Alex. She’d only stopped by to show him the sonogram picture and talk about the pregnancy.

Jenna held in a groan when she felt a sharp cramp. “I think I need to sit down.” The words came out breathless. What she needed was to calm down.

“Why, what’s wrong?” Tyler kneeled in front of her, but his concern did nothing to comfort her.

“It’s just a cramp. I’ll be fine.”

“The baby?” He went wide-eyed as if he’d forgotten and forced Jenna’s hands away from her stomach. He put his in their place and began to rub.

She concentrated on her breathing. Closing her eyes, she tried to shut everything out as much as possible, especially Tyler’s touch.

“I’m so sorry, Jenna.” It was Brady’s voice. Her heart rate sped up as she glimpsed an image of herself with a huge belly. Jenna smiled, placing her hands on top of his.
With flashes of herself on the floor, she envisioned blood gushing from between her legs.

She gasped, and reality came back to her. She pushed Tyler’s hands aside in anger. There was no way she could lose this baby. She had to be more careful, anything to change that possible future.

“Should you see a doctor?” Tyler looked helpless, and she tried not to laugh despite her anger at him.

“I can take care of myself. Now stop touching me. I’m mad at you.”

“I could never do that,” he teased and had the nerve to smile as she glared at him. She pushed him away again. What she needed was to have him out of her sight for a minute to pull herself together. “I could use some water, Tyler, if you don’t mind?”

She leaned back in the chair to get comfortable, her head back as far as it would go. Pinching the bridge of her nose, she began to take deep, soothing breaths.
Happy thoughts, think happy thoughts.
Okay, there was Jayden. She thought about his singing/yelling in the auditorium at his school. That certainly was a precious moment, and she couldn’t help but smile as she remembered it. Then there was the baby growing inside of her, the fingers and toes, the cute little button nose.

She rubbed at her stomach. “You know I love you already, baby. It’ll be okay. I’ll do everything I possibly can to love and protect you.”

“That doesn’t surprise me.”

Jenna jumped as Tyler reentered the room. “You always were very loving. Especially when it came to Jayden, and now we have this one to look forward to.”

She narrowed her eyes at him, not sure she was ready to forgive him just yet. Her suspicions were not proven, but his absence and lack of reliability still hurt.

“Water?” he said innocently. Closing the door behind him, he handed her the bottle as though it was a peace offering.

“Thanks.” She eyed him warily. “I’m not sure that you care anymore, but I originally stopped by to show you our first picture.” She slapped it against his chest.

“Of course I care, Jenna,” he said as he looked at it. “This is amazing, and wow, it’s so clear.” Looking awestruck, he pulled her up and into his embrace. She stiffened but then melted into him as he whispered sweet sentiments in her ear. “You’re amazing, and I love you. There are things I’d like to do to you now.” His voice turned husky as he backed her toward his desk. “I’ve missed you, Jenna.” He lifted her and placed her on the edge, then stepped in between her legs and began caressing her thighs.

“Tyler, I don’t think…” His hand was at her nape, fingers tangled in her hair. He leaned down and cut off her protest with a kiss. She shook her head. “Tyler, stop.” She was breathless already and couldn’t get herself sucked in any further.

With a groan, he pulled away. “Am I hurting you? Are you still in pain?” He dropped to his knees and massaged her lower back while placing light kisses along her navel. Between the massage and his hot breath headed to her lower regions, she moaned, giving in. Sex was certainly one way to blow off steam, and he just felt too damn good to think about anything else, and damn it, she loved him despite the heartbreak he caused her.

Tyler stood again and took advantage of her surrender with another kiss. He tilted her head to the side and plunged his tongue between her parted lips to silkily slide against hers.

“I don’t mean to interrupt.” Alex stood stiffly in the doorway with her arms folded across her chest. She cleared her throat. “But I think we should be getting back to work.”

“Why don’t you just come out and say it.” Jenna rolled her eyes. Alex had given her a cold glare, and it was obvious she didn’t like what she’d walked in on. “Come on, Alex, what you’d really like to say is, ‘Jenna, I’d like you to leave so that I can have your husband all to myself.’ Isn’t that right? You do have a thing for my husband, don’t you?”

Her reply came with a smile. “Jenna,” she said, holding the door open wider, “I’d like you to leave so that your husband and I can get back to our work. We’ve got a lot to cover, and you’d just be in the way. Unless you’d prefer to wait around and watch?” She smiled deviously.

Tyler stood there gaping like an idiot. Jenna couldn’t believe him. It was yet another disappointment because he didn’t have the balls to stick up for her. It was a wake-up call that made her wonder what the hell she was still doing there. Why had she even bothered?

“Right, well, maybe I’ll see you later.” She shook her head, wondering if any of this was worth it anymore, and then looked at Alex. “Then again, maybe not.”

Alex’s smile faltered with her short-lived victory. As Jenna slid by Tyler to grab her purse, he grabbed her arm to hold her in place. “Jenna, wait a minute, I’m not ready for you to leave just yet.” He brushed his lips against hers and then looked at Alex. “My wife is visiting, and I don’t appreciate your disrespectful tone. A family emergency has come up, so I’m taking a week off to get things resolved. I’ll do as much as I can from home, and I trust you can handle the rest without me for a few days. And another thing, just so we’re clear. In the future, when Jenna decides to visit, I expect a little more respect from my coworkers when they address her. She is my wife, and she deserves that.”

What was that about? It was Jenna’s turn to stand there with her jaw slack, and the look on Alex’s face was priceless as she stormed off, fighting back tears.

“A family emergency?”

“I’m listening to my wife.” Tyler smiled. “And it’s about time that I get my priorities straightened out. The holidays are here, and I’ve missed out on too much already.”

“Well, that has to be a first. Since when do you ever listen to what I tell you to do?” Jenna asked, still in surprise.