Biker Faith (15 page)

“You’re entitled
to lose ya mind once a while. It can fuck a man up fallin’ in love,” he chuckles.

“Who said anything about fuckin’ love?” I manage to say around my throat closing in on itself.

“If it ain’t love, you must be growin’ a pussy and too many hormones the way you’ve been actin’.”

I would laugh with him if I thought this was funny.

“I’m outta here. Call if you need me,” I say, able to stand without wanting to throw up.

“One more thing
,” Cas says as I head for the door. “With Bonnie here, either work it out with her or steer clear. I don’t need any domestics around the place.”

“Don’t plan on
havin’ any,” I tell him truthfully.

Feeling more stable, I back
track to Bonnie’s room.

A beautiful, sexy woman who keeps secrets from me, drives me crazy when she isn’t around
and even crazier when she is. Yeah, I think I do fucking love her.     

I
knock gently on her door and wait for her to answer. Nothing. I knock again.

“B
onnie, open the door.”

Please answer, I could really do with sitting down. I rest my arms on the doorframe and hang my head against the door. Doesn’t matter if she doesn’t answer, I will still apologize.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left you, I ran and I’m so fuckin’ sorry. I’m sorry I wasn’t there when your brother showed up, I should have protected you. Please open the door, we need to talk.”

“I’m here
.”

I spin round to see her behind me carrying a bottle of water.

“Did you hear what I said?” I ask, hoping I don’t have to repeat myself.

“Yeah, you’re sorry for a lot aren’t
you?” she says calmly.

“I am Bon, believe me. I’ve
had a shit couple of days but I’m here now and so are you,” I promise.

“Sparky, just because I’m staying here doesn’t mean I’m here for you. You should carry on as if I weren’t here
.”

I can’t stop myself from laughing.

“What do you think I’ve been tryin’ to fuckin’ do,” I retort.

“
You managed to do it while I was last here with Jilly,” she points out, still in a calm manner.

“I fucked up but you didn’t need to leave
.” It is almost aching as I say it.

“I did. I left because I kno
w more than most how clubs work. I can’t and won’t try to change you. I thought you were different, I guess I was wrong.”

“I can’t apologize enough.
Goin’ to Jilly was meant to coax out whatever you’re hidin’ from me. When you still didn’t say anythin’, or even react, it went too far and I have regretted it ever since.”

“Do you want to know why I didn’t want to answ
er your questions that night?” she asks.

I nod.

“Because I didn’t want you to look at me any differently. When I saw my past affecting us, I thought, yeah he must care, he wants me to trust him. I came to find you and I was going to tell you. Then I saw you with her and that’s when I knew…”

She stops speaking and breathes deeply.

“Knew what?” I ask, needing her to finish.

“That the pain they caused me I w
ould always see coming because I became immune to it. But with you, you made everything seem so normal, that I could actually be happy like everyone else. I knew I’d never see the pain coming with you. I left before we went any further and you’d hurt me beyond repair.”

And boom, I feel like complete and utter shit. I should have trusted she wouldn’t have kept anything from me that I didn’t need to know.

“Who’s them Bon?” I ask.

If she was going to tell me before then hopefully she will tell
me now. Of course she doesn’t. She steps next to me, her body so close to mine, I am itching to wrap my arms around her. She unlocks her door and steps inside, turning to face me.

“I’m going to mak
e an appointment with the Doc. Do you want me to let you know when it is?” she asks, completely going off topic.

“Yes
.”

And then in an instant I am facing a closed door
again. Every instinct I have is telling me to force the door open and get her to fucking talk to me, sort this out once and for all. But she isn’t like most women, if I push her too hard, she will run and next time she might not come back.

I find myself sitting in the bar
area. If I didn’t feel so shit, I would have been at the bar already. On the couch, letting my body relax for the first time in weeks, I watch my brothers, the women, and everything else that catches my eye. Before Bonnie turned up, this was my world. Drinking, fucking, and having a good time with my family. None of it appeals to me now, not unless Bonnie is a part of it. I want to be drinking with her, fucking her and sharing all the good times with her. I want her.

I am on my feet and up the stairs in no time. I knock on her door constantly until she opens it. She isn’t ignoring me any longer.

When she opens it I take her head between my hands and kiss her. Her lips feel right at home on mine. I pull away, but only a fraction. Her eyes are doing the crazy dance again, trying to work what I am doing now.

“If that’s what it takes for you to have me, I’ll not go near another woman again
,” I tell her.

“I’m not asking you to do that
,” she whispers.

“I know you’re not.
I’m tellin’ you.”

Her mouth open
s and closes again. She doesn’t know what to say. I’ve laid it on the line and it’s now up to her to choose to trust me enough to be with her and only her. I wouldn’t betray her with anyone else, I’m not like that. I might not have had a serious relationship before but I know I wouldn’t cheat and besides, with Bonnie in my bed why would I want to look elsewhere? Apart from her busted lip she looked perfect. I could overlook her paleness and tired-set eyes because to me she is beautiful in every way.

“
I’ll give you anything you need. I swear I won’t walk away from you again” I urge.

“There’s a lot I’ve learnt
about myself lately and I’m not prepared to put myself through anything that hurts. I just want as close to simple and normal as possible. Can you give me that because I can wait and find it somewhere else?” she says, maintaining eye contact.

My future is on the line and I am still feeling like shit but I can’t help laughing at her seriousness of moving on with someone else.

She takes a step back out of my arms and frowns at me.

“What’s so funny?
” she asks.

“
You’re funny. If you think I’ll be lettin’ you settle down with anyone who ain’t me you must be fuckin’ high. You’re carryin’ my kid and that means something to me. My kid ain’t goin’ to be raised by no one but us. I know you want me Bon, trust me to give you want you want,” I further urge.

Her silence was killing me. S
he kept her eyes glued to the floor and I couldn’t stop myself from pushing her chin up to meet me head on.

“I don’t know the half of what you’ve been through in your life but if you trust me enough, I won’t let you down Bon
.”

She doesn’t say anything but she does move closer and rests her head on my chest. I wrap my arms around her and I know she is mine. This isn’t about making sure she doesn’t fuck no one el
se or a casual fling between us. Bonnie just became my old lady.

Chapter Fifteen

Bonnie...

As much as I was getting used to waking up alone, I’ve really missed waking up with Sparky next to me, especially when he pulls me into his arms and turns me on. Last night was exceptionally hot but this morning was hot in a more sensual, slower way. Thank God I am laying down because I don’t think my legs would support me if I tried to stand.

The moment soon vanishes when he begins moaning.

“I can’t believe you can’t feel it?”

“The bed is fine
,” I tell him, unable to stop the smile at him.

“It fuckin’
isn’t. Later I’ll help you move your things back into my room and tomorrow we’ll start lookin’ for our own place,” he says, taking me by surprise.

“
Just me and you?” I ask, to make sure I understood correctly.

“Of course just us
,” he laughs. “And the kid you’re cookin’ up for us,” he adds.

I giggle and kiss him. He slides
down the bed and places soft kisses along my belly.

“So we
doin’ this then, you bein’ my old lady?” he asks, looking up at me as I lean up on my elbows.

“Yeah, we’re doing this
,” I smile.

“Never thought I’d have an old lady
,” he grins.

“Never thought I’d be an old lady
,” I snort.

“Well you are, you’re mine
.”

I relax onto on my back
allowing the happiness and bliss surround me. I finally have my own little family. I vow right now, our child will never know the pain and violence I grew up with. If I have my way, he or she won’t know nothing is bad in this world until they are old enough to see it for themselves. Even then I still want to shield him or her from it.

“I want you to know that
you can talk to me about anything, past, present or future. If you don’t then I accept that. It’s only if it puts you in danger that I need to know.”

“Okay
.”

I know he is h
oping I would now talk about it but how can I ruin this moment with such devastating tales of my past? I can’t.

His phone pinged,
alerting him to a message and draws his attention from me. He gets up out of bed, his body is absolutely amazing. The way his tattoos cover his chest and muscles, yep, I am in heaven. He is mine.

“I have to go, club business
,” he says, throwing on his jeans, leaving his chest bare as he didn’t have a top on when he came in last night.

“Quickly tell me what happened with your brother yesterday
,” he asks, sliding into his boots.

“Exactly what I told Cas. He turned up, told me to deliver a message to
Cas about a meet, gave me a number to reach him on and left,” I repeat.

“Now tell
me what else happened,” he said, looking at my lip.

“He said he
wasn’t here to take me back yet. I told him I wasn’t going anywhere, that I was staying here. Then he slapped me. That’s it.”

I purposely left out anything to do with Tommy.

“You understand I can’t let that happen again? I protect what’s mine and if he so much as comes near you, brother or not, I will take him out,” he says firmly.

There isn’t a flicker he is bluffing.

“You think I care? He has never been a brother to me. He’s my father’s son through and through. I said goodbye to that life a long time ago. I’m here with you now.”

“I won’t allow him to hurt you again, I promise you that
,” he states firmly.

“I know
,” I smile. “From now on, I don’t want to know about anything to do with the club, especially my brother. If he disappears then it isn’t anything he doesn’t deserve. I just want normal.”

“And normal is what you’re
gonna have babe,” he grins.

He leans on the bed and gives me a quick kiss befo
re grabbing his phone and leaving.

Sparky...

I walk into the back room
whistling. This is the best I have felt in months, years actually. I hadn’t realised until last night, when Bonnie finally let me in her room, just how much one woman can change everything about you.

“Where’s my brother and what have
ya done with him?” Slade scrutinizes me, as I sit at the table with the biggest, genuine smile spread across my face.

“Yeah, this time yesterday we didn’t
even know where you were, sulkin’ about that Bonnie woman,” Oak added in.

“Today’
s a new day boys. I got me an old lady and she’s havin’ my kid,” I burst with pride.

“About fuckin’ time!”
Oak slams his hand on the table. “Congratulations brother.”

All my brothers cheer and congr
atulate me on my good news. In the end Cas has to bring order to the table.

“We’ll celebrate when we get out of he
re. You all know what Joe wants. Personally, I want to take him out for threatenin’ one of ours, again. He wants to meet, how do you all feel about it?” he asks.

“Do we know what he wants?” Slade asks.

“No. I say we go ahead and arrange a meet with him and see what he wants? Whatever it is, it’s hardly gonna be a sit down over tea and fuckin’ cookies,” Cas spits out.

“I’d say if there’s ever a time to meet, it would b
e now. They are down in numbers and we’re more than capable of overtakin’ them if needs be. We couldn’t find any Ghost scum last night. I think he’s bluffin’,” Pope puts in.

“Yeah, we
say the time and place. I wanna meet with them,” I say.

I want to s
ee for myself what my woman has had to put up with all her life.

“Will I need to call in
more brothers? If you’re only goin’ for a fight Sparky, we need to know now,” Cas asks.

“I
won’t start nothin’,” I tell him.

“Bonnie is your old lady now, they
ain’t gonna take lightly to that,” Slade warns.

“Fuck
em’. I ain’t forcing her to be here. Anyway, she’s been loyal to us, not them. You’ve seen what they’ve done to her. They’ll probably use her to start a fight but I can assure you, they don’t want her for any other reason,” I tell everyone.

“Call
em’. See what he wants and we’ll go from there,” Oak says, looking slightly bored.

Cas
takes the number out of his pocket and dials it into the phone. He puts it on speaker and lays it on the table.

“Yo
,” a man answers on the fourth ring.

Yo? What an asshole
.

“It’s Cas, who’s this?”

“Ah, Cas. It’s Joe Carson. I see my sister got somethin’ right for once. I’ve been waitin’ for your call.”

Just the sou
nd of his voice mentioning Bonnie makes me angry. I grip the arms on my chair tight.

“Yeah
, I got your message. What do you want?” Cas asks.

“I want to meet. Y
ou and two of your men and me and two of my men.”

“I don’t see what we have to meet about
,” Cas says.

“You’ll see when we meet. You want to hear what I have to offer
,” Joe says confidently. “Or I can pay your old lady another visit, she looks fuckin’ hot when she’s bleedin’ all over the place. Or maybe I should come and get my sister back, I know she’s shacked up with you fuckers again. I know how you pricks like to be heroes with your women,” he goads.

“Why would you bait me when I’m more likely to
kill you on sight at a meet than to hear your offer?” Cas drools calmly, not letting his anger show in his voice.

“Because I have b
een watchin’ you all for months. I know who to hurt first and your conscious couldn’t bear the long list I have in my hand, as we speak, of the addresses of your brothers and families. If anythin’ happens to me, my men are ready to take out everyone you love.”

Cas’s
tense jaw is fighting not to argue. Hunter very nearly destroyed his life, now his son is threatening the same.

“
Tomorrow, midday at Hanks Diner. You pull any shit and we’ll take you out,” Cas warns him.

“I just want a civilised conversation
.”

“Midday at Hanks Diner
,” Cas repeats and hangs up. “He’s a dead man walkin’,” Cas growls.

“No doubt about it brother
,” Oak agrees.

“We’ll see what he wants
and take him out,” Pope offers.

“No, I suggested the di
ner for its public protection. If it comes to a fight, we will have the town as witnesses. I’ll take Sparky and Pope with me, the rest of you plot up around town. You hear gunshots, come shootin’. After we’ve heard what he’s got to say, we’ll make plans to take them out once they’re out of our town.”

“Jackets?” Pope asked.

He is asking if we need to cover our cuts to the public.

“The town know
s who we are but with two clubs together, maybe cover ups will make the other customers a little less anxious. We’ll leave here an hour before and wait them out. No one be late.”

Cas
brings the gavel down and we all get up from the table.

“Time to celebrate
,” Oak proposes.

“Or commiserate?” Slade teases.

I punch him on the arm and laugh. I am on cloud fucking nine, no one can bring me down today.

“Celebrate it is
,” he laughs with me.

The prospects begin preparing our drinks when they see us coming. Bonnie and Alannah are sitting at the bar and
Cas and I make our way over to them.

With everything that has gone on in the last twenty-four hours, I forgot I have some humble pie to eat with Barbie.

“Hey Barbs,” I start.

“Jason
,” she glares.

Okay…
she hasn’t forgotten.

“I want to say sorry for the way I spoke to you yesterday, I wasn’t fair to you and should never said what I did
.”

“No big deal.
I’m just happy you two have finally got yourselves together,” she smiles.

“Me too
,” I say, putting my arm around Bonnie.

“Not again
,” she moans and rushes out of my arms and towards the bathroom.

“Is she okay?” I ask
, watching the door close behind her.

“Morning sickness Sparks, she’s f
ine. Anyway, congratulations!” she grins and jumps down off the stool and into my arms.

“You’ll make a great daddy
,” she says, quietly.

“I hope so
,” I whisper back.

“Has my brother got a drink yet?” Oak calls from the other end of the bar.

All of a sudden, my end of the bar is lined with drinks from bottles of beer to shots of my favourite, tequila.

Bonnie returns looking sheepish. My brothers fully make her one of us, all congratulating her on our kid and her as my old lady. They
’re careful not to hug her not too tight in case she has to run off to the bathroom again, telling her if I’m ever not around and she needs anything to let them know and they will get it for her. My woman, my kid, my brothers, my family. Life is fucking good.

Everyone is having a good time, Bonnie is relaxing as much as she can between puking and joining in conversations. I w
orry about this sickness though. Three times in the last hour she has had to run to the bathroom. She assures me it’s normal.

“Is there a reason why I’m getting death glares from her?” Bonnie whispered close beside me.

“Who from?” I ask, scanning the room.

“The one you paraded by me the night I left
,” she spits.

Oh fuck, I don’t need this now, not today.

I look for Jilly and see her standing by the pool table. She looks pissed off.

I can’t be having this. S
he has always known the score between us. She has no right to act up now.

“Forget about her, I have
.”

“Have you?”

“Don’t start Bon. I told you I wouldn’t go near anyone else and I won’t. Have some faith, trust me,” I urge, hating that Jilly is trying to ruin this before it really begins.

“I know, I’m sorry. I feel like shit and it’s going to my head. I’m going to go lay down for a bit, see if I feel better later
.”

“Want me to come with?” I offer.

She really does look like crap.

“No, you stay and party. I’m just going to sleep
,” she says.

I bend down slightly and kiss her softly, I know she will be happy with this show in front of
Jilly.