Big is Beautiful (6 page)

Seniors usually won Red King and Queen, but grade level wasn't a requirement. Lori Taylor won last year. Kendra was the shoe-in this year, or had been until Matt dumped her. Now, or so the gossip said, it was anybody's game.

When the bus got to school, I couldn't have been happier. I'd heard about the Red Ball until I was sick of it. Just another dance I wouldn't go to. La Dee Da.

I pretended to put something in my backpack until everyone else got off of the bus, especially Caleb Morgan. A repeat of yesterday wouldn't be necessary. I'd learned my lesson. Once everyone had passed, I stood up to leave. Outside, the cold hit me hard and I huddled under the neck of my coat. Today, I tried my best to stay with the flow of traffic and not make people have to wait. One of my biggest pet peeves was being in someone else's way, and it seemed to be a normal thing for me.

Before I made it to the double doors, I noticed Matt standing back at the buses talking to two other football players. They were laughing and cutting up. I didn't realize it, but I must have stopped and stared. While I gawked, Kendra walked up to the group, leaned up, and whispered something in Matt's ear. Whatever it was seemed funny because he smiled and nodded. Kendra threaded her arm through his and leaned on his muscular bicep like it was the most natural thing in the world.

My world stopped.

Hadn't Matt told me just yesterday Kendra could be a jerk? Didn't he say he hated how she made fun of me? And what was he doing? Letting her touch him? And hadn't they broken up?

As my mind was spinning, someone slammed into my shoulder. "Big, move it! We can't get around you."

There was a good three feet on both sides of me, but apparently it wasn't enough for the guy who rammed my shoulder. I didn't even know his name. People I didn't even know knew me by my nickname. Could this get any worse?

I pivoted to make my feet move and get out of the way. When I did, Matt's eyes caught mine. A friendly smile crossed his lips. By his side, Kendra noticed me too. Her smirk could be seen from the space station.

Turning on a dime, I hurried in the building and to my locker. I put the books inside I didn't need, all the while trying to keep my backside out of the way. Thankfully, I was quick enough that I was gone before Kendra and her posse arrived. I couldn't deal with her this morning.

I made it to English with time to spare. We talked about poets again. Mr. Hiller gave us some more information on our projects due on Friday. My stomach growled, protesting the lack of bacon this morning. My stomach would have to lump it.

In Geometry something happened that I never thought would: I made a one hundred on my homework! My first thought was to kiss my tutor for helping me achieve the seemingly unattainable goal, then I thought better of it. Kendra Moses, I was not.

Ms. Bennett started talking from the front of the class, breaking me out of my joyfulness. "Today, we will learn about how to find the side of a triangle when some of the variables are missing on one but not of a similar one."

Whoa! Matt had covered it yesterday in tutoring! I was ahead of the game for once in my life. I worked on the problems with the class then my homework on my own. I only had three problems left to do when the bell rang.

I packed my backpack and waited for most everyone else to leave so I wouldn't block the door like yesterday when the marker tray reached out and grabbed me. Once I felt it was safe, I flung my backpack over my shoulder and headed for the door. I should have known Ms. Bennett wouldn't make it that easy on me. "Brittany, can I see you a minute?"

Good thing my back was to her, because my eyes shut and a cringe contorted my face. Not my finest look, I'm sure. It took a second, but I ordered my face to relax. With a smile as fake as a Christmas tree at a big name chain store, I turned and faced her. "I really have to get to my next class."

"It won't take long."

I nodded and walked toward her desk, knowing exactly what she wanted.

"So, how did you like tutoring?"

Tutoring? Not so much. Tutor… whew, boy!

I tried to shrug nonchalantly. "Fine, I guess. I learned things."

"I noticed. Your homework is greatly improved today."

"Matt is a good teacher… not that you're not." Stuck my foot in my mouth there.

She laughed. "No offense taken. Matt is a very good tutor. One of my best, and that's what you needed."

"Thanks." My voice went up at the end of the word because I wasn't sure if she was paying me a compliment or not. Though not the world's best geometry student, I didn't think I'd been the worst.

"It's okay. I'm not bashing you for needing help in geometry. We all have our weak subjects. Mine's English."

English. Blah. "We have to write a paper on five dead poets before Friday."

Her nose wrinkled. "I pity you."

"Pity me enough to give me less homework so I can focus on my English project?" Worth a shot.

"I'll give Matt some extra problems for you to work on tonight, so we can be sure you've gotten it firmly in the brain."

My face fell. More work. More time with Matt, whom I didn't really want to see after spotting him outside with Kendra all over him. Giving me extra work didn't seem like the best way to motivate me to do well. "Great." I moaned.

"Oh, buck up. It'll be okay. Just think of how great your report card will be if you keep this up."

"One one-hundred on homework won't help much."

Her face turned dead serious. "Obviously, you have no idea how bad your grades were. A one hundred will help tremendously. And then when you do well on your test Thursday…"

She kept talking, but I tuned her out. I didn't want to hear about a test. We had a test every Thursday. The highest I'd ever made was an eighty-seven, and that was on the first test of the year before things got hard.

"Are you listening?"

No. "Sorry. My mind flaked out on the word test."

"Understandable. After using the word I'll not say again, I asked if you would feel comfortable being tutored alone again today with Matt."

"Alone? I thought yesterday was a one-time deal."

"Well, it was, but honestly, teachers don't normally stay during tutoring unless we are requested to do so. It's not like we get paid to do it. I don't know if you know, but I give piano lessons after school, and I could reschedule—"

"Don't." What was I saying? Did I really want to be with him alone? Did it matter? It wasn't like we were going to do the nasty on the floor like sex-starved teens. He had Kendra and I had no one, and I'd definitely never have him. To Matt, he might as well be tutoring his great-grandma for all the sexual attraction he had toward me. Platonic we would be. "I don't mind being tutored by Matt alone."

She cocked a brow. "You sure that's a good idea? I mean, I may be older, but even I know he's a looker. You. Him. Alone."

"Him. Kendra Moses. Alone. Bad." It bothered me more than it should. "Him. Me. Alone. Fine."

"What's the difference between you and Kendra?"

Did she seriously ask me that? "About fifty pounds."

The classroom started filling up with the next class, and I needed to get to my third period. "You don't have to change your schedule because of Matt and me. I promise it'll be strictly tutoring."

Chapter Six

Like yesterday, my bus came and went. I stood outside watching it like a puppy missing his owner as they drove off, getting smaller and smaller. Whimpering seemed appropriate but stupid.
Suck it up, Big. Time to spend time with the new BFF.

Deflated and hungry, I went back into the school and to the right toward the geometry room. Lunch had been all right. Jillian talked and talked and talked about her new guy Oliver, and how he'd asked her to the Red Ball. I was happy for her and found myself secretly envying her. I'd never realized how much I would have liked to go until recently. At least Jillian would send me pictures so it would be 'almost' like being there — just like I 'almost' went to the movie awards I watched on TV every year, and how I 'almost' attended every home football game in Nashville.

I needed a snack.

In addition to my toast for breakfast, I only ate part of my chicken sandwich with only a few fries and no salad for lunch. This three hundred calories for each meal was hard.

A snack machine taunted me from the end of the hallway, but I ignored it. I had bigger fish to fry, namely spending an hour with Matt who
claimed
to not like how Kendra acted, but let her rub all over him this morning.

Get over it, woman! He only has eyes for her, Brittany. Maybe if they got back together, she'd leave you alone.

Interesting idea.
Maybe
Brittany
could figure out a way to get the peas in a pod together again, and maybe
Brittany
should stop thinking in third person.
It's creepy.

Telling my loud, angry stomach to get over it, I strolled into Geometry like I owned the place. There. That'd show him.

Matt had his back to me. He looked interested in whatever it was he was looking at on his desk, and my cocky bubble burst. Even sassy Brittany couldn't get his attention.

Clearing my throat, I walked past him and to my desk. He had the nerve to smile at me when he finally looked up. "Hi, Brittany."

"Sorry, I'm late." I wasn't sorry. I'd walked slowly on purpose.

"You're late?" He turned around and checked the clock. Sure enough, five after three. "Hm."

The last bit of bubble I had shriveled up and died a sad death. Even people paid to keep up with me didn't seem to care. Good thing I had such a high and awesome self-esteem.

Sarcasm would do me no good. No matter what, I still needed Matt to get me through geometry. "So, I made a hundred on my homework."

He put whatever was more important than me in his coat pocket and, finally acknowledging I existed. "I know. Ms. Bennett told me before she left. Good for you."

"Yay." I waved a pretend flag in my hand. "Thanks for helping me with it."

He shrugged, clearly a million miles away. "It's my job."

A job. A mark on his college transcript. Man, I'd get a big head with all of these affectionate words he spouted.

He must have seen my jaw become more rigid and my eyes avert his. "I'm sorry. It's just… it's been a rough day."

Oh yeah, so rough. Did Kendra bite your lip too hard when she kissed you? Wow, I sounded like a bitter ex-girlfriend, which I had no reason being because all Matt had been was nice to me one day.
One day
. I didn't own the guy.

It took everything I had to push the jealous part of my brain in its cage and refocus myself. Matt didn't look like he had the day before. His shoulders were slumped as he lay back in his seat and raked his fingers though his messy hair. I would have liked to have been his fingers…

Easy, girl.

"Something wrong?"

He let out a long breath and shook his head. "It's nothing. Family stuff."

"Ah, overbearing parents?"

He let out a small chuckle. "If only. My parents are fine. Just stressed."

"Because you're a senior? College stuff?" I couldn't help thinking of myself as a doorway to college for him. We were wasting important minutes I desperately needed for studying, but I couldn't help it. With everything I had, I wanted to help him if I could. I chalked it up to me being a good person… not because I had any sort of feelings for him. That would be craziness.

"Not exactly. I mean, they're nervous about college and all, but it's mainly my sister."

"Your sister?" Perfect Lori giving her parents problems? I couldn't see it.

"Yeah. I was texting her when you walked in. She's… sick." He hesitated and looked at me from under his eyelashes. His eyes only held mine for a few seconds before he shifted them to some sort of interesting speck of dirt on the desk.

"Sick like flu sick, or sick like needs a specialist sick?"

Matt flicked the piece of dirt off the desk and shook his head. I knew our minute of connecting was over. He probably wouldn't mention her again. "It's nothing. I'm just worried over nothing. She'll be okay."

"She still at UT?" I remembered when she got a pretty sweet scholarship to the University in Knoxville last year.

"She took the semester off, but she's already registered for some summer classes."

"That's good." I didn't know what else to say. If I knew what was wrong with her, maybe I could help. As it stood, time quickly flew by, and I needed help. Ms. Bennett probably wouldn't understand me not learning anything in tutoring. She'd more than likely get the wrong idea or something. "So, you think you can help me with all of this?" I scooted my geometry book to him and waited.

His shoulders rose up a bit and didn't look as rigid. He seemed to appreciate the change of subject. I did as well, to be honest, but it didn't mean I would stop wondering about Lori. Why had she dropped out of college? And how was she sick? It seemed more than just a cold or the flu, but she didn't look sick when she picked him up yesterday.

For the next forty minutes, we worked on my math. I finished my three problems without any help from him and only made one careless mistake that I corrected easily. After that, we went over how to solve different variables in the Pythagorean Theorem: like if
a
or
b
were missing. To my surprise, I picked it up pretty quickly. With Matt's help, I could be a whiz — or average, whichever.

While I worked on my extra practice problems, Matt tapped his foot and chewed the eraser of his pencil off, which was pretty gross actually. Germs.

Every few minutes, he checked the clock above the whiteboard or his phone.

Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. "Got a train to catch?"

He stopped mid-chew and looked like a deer in the headlights. "Huh?"

"Train. Catch. You. Got one?"

His brow rose slowly and he tilted his head. At least I was ahead of him on something.

"Are you in a hurry? Do you need to leave early or something? You keep looking at the clock."