Beautifully Broken (7 page)

             
I brought my eyes to his and was startled to see him watching me intently. “I got it in Greece, it was gorgeous there, the water so blue… I went into the shop and looked around. The artist said that sparrows stood for true love…” He looked at the ink and let his hand slide over it, “I hope I get to see true love before it’s too late for me.” He said softly. His voice was quiet, just barely above a whisper and then he looked at me and what I saw nearly took my breath away. Cole Bradley was opening up to me. Just as quickly as it came his eyes turned playful again, “Will you let me take you out again tomorrow?” He bit his bottom lip in anticipation and I laughed. “You’ve been taking me out a lot. How am I supposed to work on Old Louise if you keep distracting me?” Oh my gosh…I was flirting. I felt the heat rise up and into my face and hoped he didn’t notice. “I like spending time with you. Besides I’m talking about tomorrow night.” His hair flopped down into his eyes and I nodded eagerly. “Yeah…okay.” The stars started to dot against the now black sky. Cole shifted next to me and onto his back, positioning his head directly next to mine. He was so close that if we turned, our lips would touch. He pointed to the sky, “See that star there?” He asked, I followed his finger to see a bright star, “yes.” Cole lifted up, propping himself on his elbow again. “It’s the start of Perseus. The legend states that Perseus, mounted on a Pegasus and returning from his battle with Medusa heard the screams of Andromeda. Princess Andromeda was the daughter of King Cepheus and his Queen Cassiopeia and she was considered very beautiful. So beautiful in fact that many were jealous of her.” I sat watching his beautiful lips tell the story, completely enthralled by him, “A young sea nymph was extremely jealous considering Neptune created them to be the most beautiful beings in the world. She was also in love with Perseus.” He looked away from the stars and into my eyes, seemingly momentarily dazed, “Why was she screaming? What did he save her from?” I asked breathlessly. Cole licked his lips, “There was a monster. A sea monster that the sea nymph sent after her. When Perseus came upon her the monster was about to kill her. He removed the head of Medusa from his bag and showed it to the monster, instantly sending it back into the ocean. He snatched Andromeda from the little island and whisked her away to be his bride. However the sea nymph was angry and went to the king to complain.” He smiled, “No man can say no to a sea nymph, their powers of persuasion is too strong. The sea nymph requested that they live forever apart. So the king threw them both in the sky just far enough apart that they could not touch.” I felt sad. I had hoped that they would be in the sky together. In a way I supposed they were. I felt the tears in my eyes and didn’t understand it. I wasn’t the biggest supporter of love but this felt unfair, much like my own life.

Cole brushed my cheek gently, “Love does funny things to people. Love without jealousy is an imperfect love so the fact that
the nymph was so jealous just proved how perfect their love was.” I nodded and smiled, suddenly I felt very open and exposed and shifted uncomfortably. The silence suddenly seemed to stretch on and weigh down on me.

             
A few minutes later and we packed up our night picnic and headed back to the car. I fought against the yawns but I was struggling. “Do you think you can drive tonight? I am so tired.” I yawned again as we made it to the car. Cole froze with his hand on the passenger door, looking at me with panic. “Cole? Are you okay?” I asked stepping closer and gently resting my hand on his tense arm. His eyes looked at me nervous before he shook his head, “I-I can’t…I won’t,” He whispered, I nodded, feeling confused, “Okay…that’s fine.” I assured him, “You don’t have to and I’m just a little tired.” I felt like I had to explain myself. He stared at me, his blue eyes suddenly cold and distant. The warmth I normally felt from him was gone and replaced with something different. I had no idea what I had said wrong, “Did I say something wrong?” I asked gently. His eyes studied me and he shook his head, “No I just don’t drive.” He said. I nodded and smiled, “Okay I get that, I can teach you though.” His face shifted and his eyebrows dipped together angrily. “I didn’t say I needed you to teach me Marley. I have my reasons for not driving and they are none of your damn business.” He snapped and I stepped back in shock. I felt like he had just slapped me, the time for romantic stories and philosophical responses was over. I felt myself harden as I crossed my arms defensively, “Fine. I get it. Sorry I asked.” He sighed and rubbed his face and hair roughly. “It’s whatever. Look I think I’m just going to walk home. I’ll catch you later.” He waved at me like I was more of a nuisance. I stood there until he disappeared over the hill. It was the coldest I had ever felt him act towards me. I climbed in the car and started it. I drove in silence, the whole time wondering what I could have said wrong.

             
I made it home and sighed, leaning my head against the cool leather of the steering wheel. I replayed the night over in my head, everything was perfect up to the end of the night. I climbed out of the car and a loud bang caused me to jump. My heart leapt and pounded furiously. One of the wide barn doors banged against the barn. Dolly never left those open. I shook my head and made my way towards it, shaking out my heads from the sudden panic, “Get it together Marley.” I whispered to myself as I closed and latched the barn.

             
Suddenly I felt something. It started out as a tingle, starting at the base of my neck. The tingle continued town my spine and arms, sending goose pimples across my skin. “H-Hello?” I called out as I looked around for the source of my unease. I felt unexpectedly on edge. I almost felt like someone was watching me. My eyes scanned Dolly’s darkened windows and the tree line across the street, nothing seemed out of place. Quickly I made my way up into my apartment and for the first time in the time that I lived there, I locked my door.

Chapter Eight

              I pulled into Bradley’s farm before the sun came up the next morning. My trunk was stocked with parts, including new breaks, fuses, alternator, starter, fuel pump, and a handful of other trinkets for the truck. I backed my car beside the garage, effectively hiding it from direct view. I didn’t want Cole to see me right off the bat. After last night I spent most of the night pacing back and forth trying to figure out what and where things went wrong. This morning I felt restless and edgy. The uneasy feeling that I was being watched and followed never left me.

             
I opened the garage and almost screamed when I noticed Mr. Bradley sitting in the driver’s side of the truck. His hands on the wheel and his eyes misty and far away. “Mr. Bradley?” I asked nervously. He looked up and smiled sadly, nodding his head to the other side. I hesitated before making my way and tugging open the heavy door and climbing in. I slid into the cool leather seat and closed the door. We sat in silence before Mr. Bradley took a shaky breath. “This truck belonged to my father. He passed it down to me. I passed it to my oldest son Owen.” Mr. Bradley’s voice was both shaky and quiet. I had never heard of Owen Bradley. I wasn’t sure if I should have spoken or not so instead I stayed silent, letting Mr. Bradley say what he needed too. He ran his hand over the worn leather steering wheel. “You’ve probably never heard of Owen. Everyone pretty much keeps him quiet. Not because they are ashamed but because the pain is still fresh.” He took my hand in his and I was struck with how similar he was to Cole. He rubbed slow circles against my skin, not in a romantic way but more in a comforting way and I think it was more for him than for me so I stayed quiet.

             
“Owen was our oldest son, Cole is the baby. Owen was just two years older than Cole. He would have turned twenty five this past march. He passed away a year and a half before you got here from cancer.” Mr. Bradley’s voice broke as tears fell gently on his face. I suddenly remembered the conversation I had when I asked Cole if he had cancer. I remember the sad look on his face, but it passed so quickly that I didn’t think twice about it. He took a shaky breath and continued. “Cole took Owen’s death really hard. After he finished seeing the world…he came back here wanting to see Old Louise up and running again. It makes him feel connected to his brother.” I nodded solemnly, I could never relate since I was thankfully an only child. My parents were at least kind enough not to reproduce other than me. I was enough of a broken mess. “Cole holds his own secrets Marley and it’s been a long time since I’ve seen him smile and open up. I don’t know what it is about you but you’ve fixed my boy and I couldn’t be more thankful.” I tried to smile but I could feel my own tears struggling to be freed. “He really cares about you. I know you’ve tried to stay distant, I’ve seen it, but life is a lot less lonely and the burdens a lot less heavy if you have someone to help you. I know you were hurt before, but one piece of advice I can give you, be patient and strong; someday going through this pain is going to be useful to you.” He patted my hand and leaned back sighing deeply. “In the last three and a half years I’ve felt like I lost both my sons. First Cole…then Owen. After Owen, Cole never really came back. But then you…” He turned and smiled, “After he met you…I feel like I’m starting to get my son back.” I shook my head feeling a bit embarrassed, “Mr. Bradley…I didn’t do anything special.” I insisted.

             
Mr. Bradley turned abruptly, looking at me with wide sincere eyes, the same blue as Cole’s, making my heart ache unexpectedly. “You didn’t have to do anything but be yourself Marley. You are an amazing young lady. Just remember… Cole is going to need you in the coming year and truthfully I think you are going to need him just as much. Maybe you need to think about this, maybe it’s not about the happy ending, but more about the story you take to get there.” He sighed and rubbed his hands over his face, wiping away the evidence of his tears. “I should let you fix this old lady up.” He patted my hand again and climbed out, leaving me alone with the silence.

             
I sat in the truck mulling over my own thoughts until the sun was high in the sky. I did no work just sat thinking. The past couple days I had felt my wall chipping away bit by bit until little bits of my heart and soul were exposed. I spent my whole life building up that wall and in a matter of days Cole Bradley came along and started chipping away at it. My carefully constructed, unbreakable wall was apparently breakable after all.

             
Finally I got up and started moving around. I felt exhausted. I had been put through the proverbial emotional wringer today and I was definitely feeling it. I quickly pulled some of the parts from my truck and practically went on auto pilot. I fixed the breaks, the starter and replaced the oil and fuses by the time the sun started to set. Quickly I cleaned up just as a roll of thunder shook the garage. I loved Georgia rain storms. I found them so relaxing and after the day I had I needed to be relaxed.

             
“Hey.” Cole said from the door way. I nearly jumped at the sound of it, spinning quickly to face him. “I wasn’t sure you would have shown up today.” He sounded nervous and in a way insecure. The soft skin under his eyes was tinged purple and his cheeks looked a bit thinner, his skin slightly more pale. “Are you okay?” I asked feeling concerned. I was genuinely concerned and I realized at that moment that my wall was gone. There was only a thin sheen of plaster left on my skin because I cared. I truly cared if he was okay. Cole smiled a small apologetic smile. “I didn’t sleep well.” I nodded, knowing exactly how he felt because I had stayed up last night agonizing over every little detail of the previous night. “I’m sorry for how I acted the other night. I pushed you away when you only asked a simple question. I have my reasons Marley.” He whispered and I recalled Adam’s words from earlier that day. “You know you can trust me… you can share it with me.” I said sincerely. I really wanted him to open up, to tell me what his heavy load was, so that we could carry it together.

             
Cole stepped forward, coming closer until his chest was just barely touching mine and my heart fluttered like a tiny winged butterfly. He gently lifted my chin with his fingers bringing my lips close enough that I could feel his breath lightly tickling them. “Are you ready to tell me your secrets?” He said just barely above a whisper as his eyes searched my face. I could see them pleading with me, begging me to spill every secret I have, unload my burden so that he could help me carry it. I couldn’t, “I can’t…I’m not ready yet.” I whispered, not even trusting my own voice. He smiled and released my chin, gently pushing some hair from my face. “Then please understand when I say that I’m not ready to tell you mine either.” I could only nod as he leaned forward and gently pulled my face to him. His lips touched against my forehead feeling soft and cool. “So tonight. I know I said I would take you somewhere, but truthfully I’m exhausted and it’s supposed to rain. Rain check?” He asked kindly, I nodded “Yes that’s fine.” He smiled again and let his fingers trail down my face before he walked backwards out of the darkening garage, leaving me alone once again.  

             
Alone I felt the familiar prickle against my skin. Slowly I faced the window and gasped. Silhouetted in the window was a person. I blinked and the image was gone. “Just imagining it…” I whispered shakily as a trickle of cold sweat made its way down my spine. Quickly feeling tenser than I had before, I cleaned up and got into my car, locking the doors behind me as I looked around. I had been way t0o jumpy lately. I considered going to the liquor store but after sitting there for a few moments I knew I shouldn’t I just needed sleep. I drove home in silence and stumbled into the front door and directly into my bed.