Beautifully Broken (14 page)

             
“Miss Masters, good to see you up and moving around.” A doctor with salt and pepper hair stepped inside the room looking at a chart before looking up and smiling. “What happened?” I asked quietly. The doctor continued to flip through pages as he answered me, “Our minds and bodies are amazing things. The day you were brought in you experienced several stressors. Your mind put you in, for lack of a better term, a coma in order to protect you. It shut down both your mind and body in order to help you process and heal from the shock you experienced.” He put the chart back in the bed and stepped closer to me. “May I?” he asked kindly as he lifted my wrist and slid his fingers to my pulse. I had to fight against the panic and tears that threatened to keep my heart rate as even as possible. “It’s not an uncommon thing to happen and medically you are just fine.” He lifted each of my eye lids and flashed a small light in both of them. “My suggestion is to take it easy for a couple more days to adjust to being awake, take the prenatal vitamins as prescribed and follow up in two weeks with your primary care.” I nodded slowly and looked up at him, “How long was I asleep?” I asked carefully. “Four and a half weeks.” He smiled and left the room leaving me alone with the Bradley’s.

             
Suddenly it dawned on me…slowly and I looked up at Michelle. “Prenatal?” Her smile was wide and pleasant, almost giddy, “You’re pregnant.” I stared at her in complete shock. She had to be mistaken. “But Cole’s…” I couldn’t speak the words. I couldn’t bring myself to say it. “Right here.” His voice came from the door way and I nearly broke down with relief. His hair was shorter and a little less messy and scruff covered his jaw. His eyes were bright and shining as he stared at me. His left arm was in a sling and today he wore a faded red t-shirt that brought out the bronzy color of his skin and made his blue eyes more vibrant. “Cole…” I whispered and tears filled my eyes. I cried more in the last month that I had in my entire life. He made his way over to me steadily and sunk down on the bed, folding me against him. I latched my arms around him and he grunted.

             
I breathed a sigh of relief and worked on steadying my trembling. “I thought you were dead.” I whispered in the crook of his neck. I felt him nod, “I know. But I don’t plan on leaving you anytime soon.” He smoothed my hair and slightly rocked me. “I’m pregnant.” I whispered, testing out the words for the first time. Cole chuckled. “Yes. You are.” He kissed my forehead and a steadying warmth flowed through me. I felt the most relaxed that I have since waking. “You ready to get back home?” He asks calmly. I look at his shoulder and back to his eyes before nodding slowly. “Hey.” He touches my face with his good hand. “This is nothing. This is worth it to be able to see you. It’ll heal.” His lips find mine and softly he kisses me. He tastes like water and a little sweet. I love how he tastes. “I love you.” I whisper the words that have been hanging on my lips since the second I seen him in the doorway. “I love you too.” He smiles back and the feeling of finally being free takes over. I am free.

Chapter Eighteen

             
Cole guides me through the front door of my apartment and I’m momentarily taken back. Dolly, Harry, Susan and the Bradley’s stand around the small space. They are covered in droplets of paint and my living room is painted robin’s egg blue. Pictures line the walls. Pictures. I look around as I fight back the tears, studying the photos in their black picture frames. The first one is a black and white photo of Dolly and I and I’m actually smiling. I touch the glass and smile, her hair is taking up the majority of the photograph. The next photo is of me underneath a car from Harry’s shop. The next Susan and Harry standing side by side and smiling.

             
I continue down the line of photos when one catches my attention. Mr. and Mrs. Bradley sit on the top step of their porch, the step beneath them is occupied by a tall man that looks vaguely like Cole but also completely different. His hair, while similar to Cole’s has a reddish tint and he shares Cole’s dimples. Below him, his knee up and elbow resting casually against it is Cole. He doesn’t smile, he just stares blankly at the photographer. His mouth is set in a straight line and his hair falls into his eyes. I feel him come up from behind me and wrap his good arm around my middle. “It was taken just after I received the news of my condition. I was angry.” He explained. I studied the picture, wishing I could erase the anger and pain that was so precisely captured. “Why is this one here?” I whispered, not understanding why I would want a picture of his pain. “Because it goes next to this one, to show you how you have changed me.” Always the philosophical thinker, I chuckle as I move to the final picture. I wasn’t sure when it was taken. I don’t remember anyone with a camera but there sitting at a table at the diner are Cole and I. He has an easy smile on his face as he stares at me, dimples and all, and I am smiling. I move closer with the need to see every little detail. My face looks softer, my eyes gentler, and my smile carefree. There is even a blush in my cheeks. Cole and I…we don’t look broken anymore. Somehow the two of us fixed one another.

             
After looking at the pictures I finally notice the kitchen. It too is changed. Instead of the stark white the paint now reminds me of a sunset. Deep orange starts at the ceiling and gradually makes its way down to a yellow. A vase of daisies sit on the counter top and on every other spare surface is food. A shelf was put up at some point and was now filled with cook books. A bright yellow one catches my attention, ‘cooking for dummies’ is scrawled across the bind. “Thank you.” I whisper softly. Never had I felt so accepted in my entire life as I did at this very moment.

             
A week goes by and there isn’t a single day where Cole and I are apart. The thought of it makes me deliriously happy. “I want to take you somewhere.” I say to him that Sunday. It’s beautiful out with a bright blue sky and large white cotton ball clouds. He smiles and stands up taking my hand. “Where are we going?” He asks and I shake my head. “If I tell you then it wouldn’t be a surprise.” I say, repeating his line just before leaving for the beach. Before we are completely out of the front door Mr. Bradley beeps the horn. I hear Cole gasp behind me and my smile was wide enough that it was hurting my cheeks. I had managed to repair Old Louise and even took her to get a brand new paint job and there she sat, gun metal gray and shiny. “Surprise.” I whispered happily. Tears were filling up in Cole’s eyes as he tucked me into his side. “Seriously Marley, this is the best gift besides our child you could have given me.” He voice cracked and it made me smile more, knowing how much this all meant to him. I loved this man.

             
I wondered how I had made it through life with so little love in it. Now love was over flowing. I had so many people surrounding me with love that I know I’ll never be able to survive without it again. Cole squeezes my hand and let’s go before rushing down to the truck. His eyes take in every detail of the truck no matter how small and when Mr. Bradley slides out I watch Cole slid in. I may have meant to pass through Oliver, just slip through without noticing any of them. Fate had another plan for me and I know now without a doubt that I was meant to break down here. Oliver was meant for me, meant to fix me. I practically skip down the steps next in order to slide up next to the truck. Before I can say a word his hands encase my face and his lips capture mine. I can taste tears on them. Happy tears. And it isn’t long before I’m shedding some of my own. Mr. Bradley climbs into the bed of the truck and pats the side. “It’s a ten minute drive, let’s go for old times’ sake!” He calls through the window at Cole. I can see he wants to. “Want me to drive?” I ask him. He smiles and shakes his head. “Not this time. This is another thing I want to see.” I nod and slid into the truck next to him. He grips my hand and takes the truck out of gear and then we are pulling away from the apartment and towards the Bradley farm. “I love you.” I say as we pass by the diner. “I love you too.” And just like that I feel free and mended.

Epilogue

Five years later…

“His sight is gone. Legally he is completely blind.
He is classified as NLP which stands for No light perception. He can’t even see different tones of lights or shapes.” The doctor says as we sit huddled in the cold sterile room. “And there is nothing we can do?” I ask heavily already knowing there was nothing. Of course I knew this was going to happen but it didn’t make it easier. Cole sat stoically in the chair across from me. His mother and father stood with one of their hands on each of his shoulders. I smiled at him, more out of habit than knowing he could see me. I gave him everything I could while he could see. We had a small wedding at his parents’ farm five years ago. I wore a satin and lace gown that Dolly had helped Susan make for me and Emma Jo had been a bridesmaid. The entire town came. Harry even gave me away.

             
Susan and Harry were a blessing in disguise. They took me in as their own and in a strange way it felt right. Emma Jo, although she doesn’t come around often, became like my sister. We call each other nearly once a week. After our few bonding experiences we talked more and became very close. I was even her bridesmaid when she married Mason. I was their now three year old Daughter Fiona’s god mother. Susan and Harry are here too, standing next to me as Susan holds my daughter Olivia who is two. Owen, our son, is five years old now and stands holding Cole’s hand with white knuckles. I think it’s possible that he is handling this better than Cole. Cole was able to witness both their births, first steps and first birthdays. I nodded slowly, already knowing by the face the doctor was making what he would say. “The only thing you can do now is adjust. It won’t be easy and I will not tell you that it will be.” He says sadly.

             
Cole stands and I move to take his hand. He doesn’t push me away as he had been doing. He’s coming to terms with everything. He’s quite on the way home and I don’t break it. I know he is processing. Our house is only a half an hour from the doctor’s office. It use to belong to Dolly but she moved to the other side of town after old man Kelly passed away last summer and she gave us the house and we moved out of the barn apartment. I was grateful for a lot these past few years. Not only did I obtain the house but Harry and Susan signed the shop over to us to after they retired at the beginning of this past year.

             
When we pull up to the house Cole makes no move to get out the car. “Baby?” I whisper and reach out to touch his arm. He blinks and turns towards me. His eyes don’t meet mine and I ignore the pain in my chest. I’ll miss that the most. He smiles sadly. I haven’t seen his dimples in a while. I miss those too. I know he is dealing with a lot though so I don’t press the issue. Olivia is asleep in the back seat and Owen is quite. Cole and I sit just staring in the front. “Thank you.” He whispers. He slowly moves in and kisses me. I have to move into the path so that he gets my lips and not empty space. “You gave me so much. I miss seeing your face.” His voice wavers and he smiles wider, this time his dimples show. “At least I can get a dog.” His voice is lighter and I laugh. Olivia jerks awake and starts to cry. “Okay.” I say opening the door. “You can get a dog.” Once out I watch as Cole climbs out of the car. “I already know what we can name him.” I smile pausing for dramatic effect. “What’s that?” he asks smiling like he already knows what I’ll say and with how well he knows me I don’t doubt it. “Hercules.”

Acknowledgements

I would like to extend my gratitude to a few people that without them I never would have done anything like this. Without their encouragement, talent, and patience none of this would have been possible.

First of all I must thank my ever encouraging, however sarcastic, husband. Long nights of story plots, character description and crying over a bad review he stuck with the encouragement. Although it’s possible he may have just said those things to shut me up! Nevertheless Thank you!!

Next I have to thank my sisters. Without them I would have no one to share in my love of reading. My little sister wants to pursue a career in editing and I can’t wait to see all she can do! She makes me so proud to be her big sister!
Good Luck Tara!

To my several beta readers.
Amanda, Veronica and Kerri! I would like to thank you guys the most. Without you reading draft after draft and giving me reviews without all the sugar and sweetness you have made me a better writer. Thank you for asking the questions I never thought to ask or pointing out the things I failed to see. You guys truly are the reason my novels make it to the final process.

Thank you to Donna, my cover guru. Without you bouncing ideas with me and making me see things I didn’t think to see. You helped me create covers that are mysterious, beautiful, and tell a story all on their own! Thank you!! Can’t wait to go over more projects with you!

My children. My two little princes’ you are the reason I do this. I watch you both every day. Watch you grow and learn and ask questions. You guys are my greatest accomplishment.

And finally my fans. I never would have had the courage to do this without you all. Your words of encouragement and asking me to finish stories. You guys are amazing!

And one more thank you. Thank you to the Indie Authors that I inspire to be like. Quinn Loftis. Amy Bartol. Shelly Crane. Rachel Higginson. Abbi Glines. Nicole Williams. Seriously, you ladies are incredible and I could only hope to weave tales equal to those that you ladies produce. To the authors that still encourage my love of reading. Cassandra Clare. Stephanie Meyers. Veronica Roth. Suzanne Collins. I have fallen in love with your characters every day.