Bad as in Good (10 page)

“Why'd you say it like that?”

“Like what? What do you want me to say?”

“I was expecting you to ask for some details. You never ask me for details when it comes to Tariq. To be honest, I need some sex therapy. Talkin' 'bout it might relieve some stress.”

“Then talk.” Her nostrils flared as she fidgeted in her seat and played with a loose dreadlock. “Are you gonna open that bottle or what?”

I walked into the kitchen and pulled out a bottle of Moscato d'Asti. After pouring a full glass, I sat back and waited for the alcohol to take effect. A tipsy Loraine was a lot easier to manipulate than a sober one.

Once she was two full glasses in, I gave my questions another go. “Is there something I don't know about Tariq that you do? Have you heard stories?”

“Like what?”

“I dunno. Anything I would need to know. The fact that you
don't
wanna know makes me think that you already know.”

Her eyes glazed over and she tapped the wine bottle for a refill. Upon another sip, her face went cold and body tight. After a long pause, she sat her drink down and took a deep breath. “Girl, I'ma come out and say it. Tariq and…well, Tariq and I had sex.”

As quickly as she released her next breath, my breaths had stopped short. My emotions were scattered, and I didn't understand which ones to pick up first. I sucked in my bottom lip and nodded. I didn't know what else to do but nod in agreement even though there had been nothing to agree to. Now, when my phone lit up, I paid attention. I could have ignored it, but I was forced to regard every detail of that moment. “When?”

“It was a long time ago. Way before Tariq and I even worked together. It was a one-time thing. Nothing serious; a friendly passing.” Loraine left out any pauses. She answered my questions hurriedly, while apologetically dismissing any wrongdoing on her part.

“Last I checked, friends ain't fuckin' in passing.”

She stopped before she said anything else to set me off. Not long
before, I was professing my freedom from a sap-sucking relationship. Now, I was back in imprisonment by the same woman who gave me my initial sentencing. She picked her glass back up and sucked down the rest of her drink. At that time, we both glanced at the clock. Twelve-thirty. We planned to stay up late watching a movie centered around a girl gettin' even, but her happenstance confession ruined all plans for late-night gab sessions. “Erin, I didn't—”

“Why would you introduce me to a man you fucked? Why would I want your leftovers?”

“He's not my leftovers. We weren't datin'. He took me out on two dates. The second date he closed the deal and I never really heard from him again. At the time, I was engaged to my ex-husband and wasn't lookin' for a relationship wit' Riq.”
Riq.
Now, Tariq was
Riq
to her. I was sick. “It was somethin' that happened. When I got hired at his office, we talked but we both knew nothing was there. I thought he'd be a good guy for you.”

“Why wouldn't you tell me this when you hooked us up? Why wait 'til now? Don't you think that's a detail you shouldn't leave out? Loraine, you told me about the car he drove, the diamond earring in his left ear, and even the type of shoes he wore. Whether you fucked him or not is something I'd like to know way more than the type of shoes he wears.”

“I dunno. I didn't think it was that important.”

“If I'm supposed to be your friend, I would think you would know what type of person I am. Wouldn't you want to know if I fucked your ex-husband, Lorenz?”

She lowered her eyes and hunched her shoulders forward. “You're right.”

I breathed in deeply and sighed. I looked over at my blinkin'
phone. When I stood up and stopped the DVD, she understood that our night was over. “It's late. I have to get to bed.”

Gathering her things, she said, “I figured you'd freak out if you knew we had sex, but I didn't want that to get in the way of you meetin' a nice guy. Well, I thought he was a nice guy.”

“We don't have to discuss this anymore. You said your peace and I'm done. Let's get some sleep.”

“I'm sorry, Erin.”

I ignored her apology as I scrolled through the slew of text messages sent over by Tariq. “Lemme walk you out.”

Loraine dropped her eyebrows and cracked her knuckles. She stood up, stretched, and headed toward my door. “Don't be mad at me.”

I didn't want to be mad but wondered why I shouldn't be. Even though Tariq was not worth my time, my best friend's sexual past shouldn't intersect with mine, especially when it came to a man like Tariq. I gave Loraine a fake smile and closed the door behind her while I determined which emotion was a suitable fit.

I
tried to get away from Simoné. At first it worked. Initially, my relationship wit' Simoné had slowly dissolved. Eventually, the emotion she thought was love shed its coating and revealed itself as mere lust. My refusal to return to the same monogamous lifestyle I abandoned for a woman I barely trusted gradually became a pill too big for Simoné to swallow. Soon, my calls stopped coming. Then, I stopped answering hers. For a while, I thought I was rid of her.

I kept datin' when I could. There was this one chick. Loraine. She had red, shoulder-length dreads and beautiful, cool gray eyes. It turned me on to find a woman with all of her own hair on her head. Wit' all the weaves, relaxers, and press and curls, natural hair intrigued me. When I saw her smile at me through the bulletproof glass at the bank, I couldn't help but smile back.

“Is there anything else I could help you with today?” She twirled her hair in her fingers and blushed when I slowly licked my lips.

“I'm diggin' yo' whole natural thing.” Her face went red as she bowed her head and ran her fingers through her locs. Soon, our conversation went from her hairstyle to her structured rose-colored cheeks that accentuated her chestnut skin and petite frame, all leading to her giving me her number. I ignored the impatient customers
tappin' their feet and clearin' their throats behind me in the teller line. She was mine, and I'd have her panties on my wall by the end of the week.

•  •  •

“What do you do?”

“I work in insurance.” I chugged down my Bud Light Lime and looked into her eyes when she spoke. We sat across from each other at dinner as she nervously snickered and twirled her hair like a teenage girl. I hated the initial “gettin' to know you convo” that all first dates were accustomed to. With Simoné, we skipped all that and got down to the nitty-gritty. With Loraine, I was back to fake smiles, corny jokes and empty discussions about our future.

“That seems boring. What made you get into that?”

“It's not that borin'. You got good and bad days.” With my steak halfway done and my second beer runnin' through me, I was ready to end the night at her place. I'll admit she was difficult to read. We'd end up with her legs on my shoulders, but her shyness made me question how long it'd take. I liked good girls for two reasons: they were good at pretending they were too wholesome to fuck too early, and they were even better when they did. “Whatchu got planned for tonight?”

“After dinner?” She looked down at her empty plate and realized that the night was coming to a close. “I dunno. Did you have plans?”

“I'm leaving that up to you.”

She smiled and swallowed the rest of her Shirley Temple. “I guess we can get out of here and go from there.”

I asked for the check and led her to my car. With a full stomach and a tipsy mind, I was all but aching to see what treasure she hid beneath her pencil skirt. It took all my strength not to reach over
and feel between her thighs as we drove home. She was feelin' me, but I couldn't risk movin' too fast an' leavin' wit' nothing.

When we stopped outside her apartment building, I turned off the ignition and waited for her to make the invitation. We sat in my car quietly as our breaths surrounded our silence. After glancing at her phone, her nervous smile slightly faded as she looked up at her building. “I would invite you in, but I have to get up in the morning.”

Damn. I realized our night would go one of two ways. I mentally calmed the beast in my pants and nodded. “Okay, I understand.”

I pulled her face close to mine and then slid my tongue between her lips. She pulled back initially and surrendered her lips to me. She moaned as I gripped the back of her neck and slipped my lips over hers. I let my other hand creep up her thigh as she tickled my tongue with hers. As my hand moved closer to her panties, I sucked and nibbled on her lips to distract her from my mission. She kept moaning as our kiss goodnight turned into more than she bargained for. I kept her close to me and licked her lips to my satisfaction. Then I let my fingers tickle her drippin' wet pussy folds while my tongue ventured for the back of her throat. She innocently spread her thighs to let my hand go in further. I expected her to move away but was surprised when she guided my hand to her g-spot. We sucked each other's lips as I finger-fucked her in her parking lot. She hadn't expected to let me get this far, but wit' magic fingers like mine, I wouldn't have to stop 'til she came. However, until my penis felt what it grew hard for, I couldn't allow her to come before me.

When her body vibrated and she squeezed my shirt with her tongue atop mine, I pulled away against her demands and smiled. “You sure you don't want me to come in?”

She caught her breath and stared at me with confusion and frustration.
She looked back up at her apartment and shook her head. “You can't. I can't let you in tonight.” She fixed her panties and wiped the sweat from her forehead. After pullin' down my visor, she pulled up her locs and retouched her lipstick.

As I watched her prep herself to walk into her own apartment, I laughed at my sudden realization. “Is there a specific reason why I can't come up?”

“N-no,” she stuttered. “I'm…” She calmed down and caught her breath. “I'm not that type of girl. Maybe next time.” She smiled and unlocked the door. “Call me later?”

I nodded and watched as she scurried away. There was no doubt in my mind that she was runnin' to meet the man she left at home. I assumed that she expected he'd be home later, but her timin' was off. I'm sure this wasn't the first time a woman used me to satisfy the void her man left in her sex life; however, this was the first time I was made aware. I didn't enjoy being the same type of man that took my woman from me, but I couldn't deny the role I played. I was the man who paid no regard to the lives my lovers lived outside of my bedroom. Plus, I couldn't lose out on the chance to lie up with a woman whose pussy was tighter than I had felt in a long time. I drove away, ignoring the guilt I felt for knowingly planning to lie with another man's woman.

•  •  •

When I saw Loraine two weeks later, I assumed the secluded diner where she asked me to meet her was a location her man rarely frequented. I asked no questions; I went with the flow and gave her the fuel she needed to eventually drop her panties at the time of my choosing.

“You come here often?”

She shrugged her shoulders and sipped on her lukewarm coffee. “As often as I can.”

With little desire to force small talk, I got right to it. “Let's get out of here.”

“You don't wanna order anything first?”

“I ate a few hours ago and I'm still full.”

“You sure? The pancakes here are really good. And where would we go?”

“Anywhere but here.”

“I dunno, Riq.”

“I missed you. I haven't seen those eyes in too long.” I leaned in closer to her and deviously smirked. “I don't wanna share you with anyone.”

She turned her head to hide her wide grin. Checking her watch, she nodded. “Okay, let's get out of here.”

We left her jeep at the diner and I drove her to my place to avoid any possible run-ins with her man. When I walked her inside, I led her over to my couch and turned on the TV. I dunno what was playing, but I needed her distracted long enough to let me kiss down her neck. Like always, she coyly pretended as if she didn't want it and moved away from me.

“You have a really nice townhouse.”

I smiled and pulled her closer. “I told you. I want you all to myself.”

She licked her lips and invited me to kiss them. I leaned in and gently kissed her plump lips while grippin' the back of her neck. This time, I wasn't takin' it slow. I couldn't risk her getting a call from her man demanding to know her whereabouts while she lied her way out of my embrace. I held on to her waist and laid her back on my couch. When I spread her legs and began pullin' down her panties, she resisted. I compromised by putting my fingers to work
while I sucked in her lips. She moaned as her arms wrapped around my neck and she willingly spread her thighs for my fingers to get through. She whispered, “Ooh…yes.”

With my approval for entry, I pulled the condom out from my back pocket, unbuckled my pants, and sucked and nibbled on the side of her neck. With her panties to the side, I slid myself inside of her and trembled as her lips gripped my dick. It felt like I was in something brand new as she clenched her jaw to hold in her shrieks of satisfaction. “Do you want me to stop?” I whispered into her ear as her hips gyrated beneath me.

“Don't stop.” Her legs spread wider to give me room to dig deeper. I pulled down her dreads so I could watch them bounce off her shoulders as I thrust inside her.

Unprepared for how good she felt, I moaned, too. “Shit.” I gripped the couch cushions. I was closer to a come than I thought I would be.

I pulled up her shirt and unhooked her bra to reveal perfectly round breasts. With a body like hers, my initial guilt resurfaced. I didn't want her to myself because she'd only remind me of unnecessary pain. She damn sho' wasn't no saint, but wit' lips that supple and a body that stacked, some man had to be missin' her.