American Buffalo (9 page)

DON
: You asked me the one reason.

TEACH
: You make yourself ridiculous.

DON
: Yeah?

TEACH
: Yeah.

DON
: Then answer it.

TEACH
: What is the question?

DON
: Fletch knows how to get in.

TEACH
: “Get in.” That’s your reason?

DON
: Yes.

Pause.

TEACH
: What the fuck they live in Fort Knox? (“Get in.”)
(Snorts.)
You break in a
window,
worse comes to worse you kick the fucking
back door
in. (What do you think this is, the Middle Ages?)

DON
: What about he’s got a safe?

TEACH
: Biiiig fucking deal.

DON
: How is that?

TEACH
: You want to know about a safe?

DON
: Yes.

TEACH
: What you do, a
safe
. . . you find the combination.

DON
: Where he wrote it down.

TEACH
: Yes.

DON
: What if he didn’t write it down?

TEACH
: He wrote it down. He’s
gotta
write it down. What happens he forgets it?

DON
: What happens he doesn’t forget it?

TEACH
: He’s gotta forget it, Don. Human nature. The point being, even he
doesn’t
forget it,
why
does he not forget it?

DON
: Why?

TEACH
: ‘Cause he’s got it
wrote down.

Pause.

That’s why he
writes
it down.

Pause.

Huh? Not because he’s some fucking turkey can’t even remember the combination to his own
safe
. . . but only in the event that (God forbid) he somehow
forgets
it. . . he’s got it wrote down.

Pause.

This is common sense.

Pause.

What’s the good keep the stuff in the safe, every time he wants to get at it he’s got to write away to the manufacturer?

DON
: Where does he write it?

TEACH
: What difference?
Here
. . . We go in, I find the combination fifteen minutes, tops.

Pause.

There are only just so many places it could be. Man is a creature of habits. Man does not change his habits overnight. This is not like him. (And if he does, he has a very good reason.) Look, Don: You want to remember something (you write it down). Where do you put it?

Pause.

DON
: In my wallet.

Pause.

TEACH
:
Exactly
!

Pause.

Okay?

DON
: What if he didn’t write it down?

TEACH
: He wrote it down.

DON
: I know he did. But just, I’m saying, from
another
instance. Some made
-
up guy from my imagination.

TEACH
: You’re saying in the instance of some guy . . .

DON
: (Some
other
guy . . .)

TEACH
: . . . he didn’t write it down?

Pause.

DON
: Yes.

TEACH
: Well, this is another thing.

Pause.

You see what I’m saying?

DON
: Yeah.

TEACH
: It’s another matter. The guy, he’s got the shit in the safe, he didn’t write it
down . . .

Pause.

Don . . . ?

DON
: Yes?

TEACH
: How do you know he didn’t write it down?

DON
: (I’m, you know, making it up.)

Pause.

TEACH
: Well, then, this is not based on
fact.

Pause.

You see what I’m saying?

I can sit here and tell you
this,
I can tell you
that,
I can tell you any fucking thing you care to mention, but what is the point?

You aren’t telling me he didn’t write it down. All that you’re saying, you can’t
find
it. Which is only natural, as you don’t know where to look. All I’m asking for a little trust here.

DON
: I don’t know.

TEACH
: Then you know what? Fuck you. (All day long. Grace and Ruthie Christ) What am I standing here convincing you? What am I doing demeaning myself standing here pleading with you to protect your best interests? I can’t believe this, Don. Somebody told me I’d do this for you . . . (For
anybody)
I’d call him a liar. (I’m coming in here to efface myself.) I am not Retch, Don, no, and you should
thank God and fall
down
I’m not. (You’re coming in here all the time that “He’s so good at cards . . . “) The man is a cheat, Don. He
cheats
at cards—Fletcher, the guy that you’re waiting for.

DON
: He cheats.

TEACH
: Fucking A right, he does.

DON
: Where do you get this?

Pause.

You’re full of shit, Walt. You’re saying Retch cheats at cards.

Pause.

You’ve seen him. You’ve
seen
him he cheats.

Pause.

You’re
telling
me this?

TEACH
: (The whatchamacallit is always the last to know.)

DON
: Come on, Walt, I mean, forget with the job and all.

TEACH
: You live in a world of your own, Don.

DON
: Fletch cheats at cards.

TEACH
: Yes.

DON
: I don’t believe you.

TEACH
: Ah. You can’t take the truth.

DON
:
NO.
I am sorry. I play in this fucking game.

TEACH
: And you don’t know what goes on.

DON
: I leave Fletcher alone in my
store.
. . . He could take me off any time, day and night.

What are you telling me, Walt? This is nothing but poison, I don’t want to hear it
(Pause.)

TEACH
: And that is what you say.

DON
: Yes. It is.

Pause.

TEACH
: Think back, Donny. Last night On one hand. You lost two hundred bucks.

Pause.

You got the straight, you stand pat. I go down before the draw.

DON
: Yeah.

TEACH
: He’s got what?

DON
: A flush.

TEACH
: That is correct. How many did he take?

DON
: What?

TEACH
: How many did he take?

Pause.

DON
: One?

TEACH
:
NO.
TWO
, Don. He took two.

Pause.

DON
: Yeah. He took two on that hand.

TEACH
: He takes two on your standing pat, you kicked him thirty bucks? He draws two, comes out with a
flush?

DON
(Pause)
: Yeah?

TEACH
: And spills his fucking Fresca?

DON
: Yeah?

TEACH
: Oh. You remember that?

DON
(Pause):
Yeah.

TEACH
: And we look down.

DON
: Yeah.

TEACH
: When we look back, he has come up with a king-high flush.

Pause.

After he has drawed two.

Pause.

You’re better than that, Don. You
knew
you had him beat, and you were right.

Pause.

DON
: It could happen.

TEACH
: Donny . . .

DON
: Yeah?

TEACH
: He laid down five red cards. A heart flush to the king.

Pause.

DON
: Yeah?

TEACH
: I swear to God as I am standing here that when I threw my hand in when you raised me out, that I folded the king of hearts.

Pause.

DON
: You never called him out.

TEACH
: No.

DON
: How come?

TEACH
: (He don’t got the address the guy?)

DON
: I told you he didn’t.

Pause.

He’s cheating, you couldn’t say anything?

TEACH
: It’s not my responsibility, to cause bloodshed. I am not your keeper. You want to face facts, okay.

DON
: I can’t believe this, Teach.

TEACH
: (Friendship is marvelous.)

DON
: You couldn’t say a word?

TEACH
: I tell you now.

DON
: He was cheating, you couldn’t say anything?

TEACH
: Don. Don, I see you’re put out, you find out this guy is a cheat. . . .

DON
: According to you.

TEACH
: According to me, yes. I am the person it’s usually according
to
when I’m talking. Have you noticed this? And I’m not crazed about it you’re coming out I would lie to you on this.
Fuck
this. On anything. Wake up, Jim. I’m not the cheat. I know you’re not mad at me, who are you mad at? Who fucked you up here, Don? Who’s not here? Who?

DON
: Ruth knows he cheats?

TEACH
: Who is the bitch in league with?

DON
: Him?

TEACH
(Pause)
: You know how much money they took from this game?

DON
: Yeah?

TEACH
: Well, I could be wrong.

DON
: Don’t fuck with me here, Teach.

TEACH
: I don’t fuck with my friends, Don. I don’t fuck with my business associates. I am a businessman, I am here to do business, I am here to face facts.

(Will you open your eyes . . . ?) The kid comes in here, he has got a certain coin, it’s like the one you used to have . . . the guy you brought in doesn’t show, we don’t know where
he
is.

Pause.

Something comes down, some guy gets his house took off.

Pause.

Fletcher, he’s not showing up. All right. Let’s say I don’t know why. Let’s say you don’t know why. But I know that we’re both better off. We are better off, Don.

Pause.

What time is it?

DON
: It’s midnight.

Pause.

TEACH
: I’m going out there now. I’ll need the address.

TEACH
takes out revolver and begins to load it.

DON
: What’s that?

TEACH
: What?

DON
: That.

TEACH
: This “gun"?

DON
: Yes.

TEACH
: What does it look like?

DON
: A gun.

TEACH
: It
is
a gun.

DON
(rises and crosses to center)
: I don’t like it

TEACH
: Don’t look at it.

DON
: I’m serious.

TEACH
: So am I.

DON
: We don’t need a gun, Teach.

TEACH
: I pray that we don’t, Don.

DON
: We don’t, tell me why we need a gun.

TEACH
: It’s not a question do we
need
it . . .
Need
. . . Only that it makes me comfortable, okay? It helps me to relax.

So, God forbid, something inevitable occurs and the choice is (And I’m
saying
“God forbid”) it’s either him or us.

DON
: Who?

TEACH
: The guy. I’m saying God forbid the
guy
(or somebody) comes in, he’s got a knife . . . a cleaver from one of those magnetic
boards
. . . ?

DON
: Yeah?

TEACH
: . . . with the two
strips
. . . ?

DON
: Yeah?

TEACH
: And
whack,
and somebody is bleeding to death. This is all. Merely as a deterrent.

Pause.

All the preparation in the world does not mean
shit,
the path of some crazed lunatic sees you as an invasion of his personal domain. Guys go nuts, Don, you know this. Public
officials
. . .
Ax
murderers . . . all I’m saying, look out for your own.

DON
: I don’t like the gun.

TEACH
: It’s a personal thing, Don. A personal thing of mine. A silly personal thing. I just like to have it along. Is this so unreasonable?

DON
: I don’t want it.

TEACH
: I’m not going without it.

DON
: Why do you want it?

TEACH
: Protection of me and my partner. Protection, deterrence. (We’re only going around the fucking
corner
for chrissake . . .)

DON
: I don’t want it with.

TEACH
: I can’t step down on this, Don. I got to have it with. The light of things as they are.

DON
: Why?