All Roads Lead Home (44 page)

“And I love you.”

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come with you?” He asked me again, but I was more than okay going back to my office. Jagger didn’t want the flashbacks of that horrific day to enter my mind, especially after our wedding and honeymoon. I assured him that I was okay and owed it to Raymond to personally resign my partnership with the man who had given me the opportunity of a lifetime. Zoey and her father knew it was coming, but I never actually said the words until now.

I was welcomed back with hugs and congratulations. My heart skipped a beat when I passed the administrative counter and saw a new assistant in Cheryl’s chair. I shrugged it off and kept walking toward my office where Raymond and Zoey were waiting for me.

My career began here with Steele and Copeland Law Firm. A spunky free spirit with crazy hair barreled through my office one day and promised we would be sisters forever, and how right she was. And then my life changed the moment I walked into my office only to be shocked by Wendy’s visit. She rocked my structured world and turned it inside out, and I couldn’t be happier. And now I will walk through these doors for the last time. Again, I couldn’t be happier with the choice I have made.

We reminisced and laughed for hours while Zoey and Tommy helped me pack my last box. They hugged me fiercely and promised to visit me in Wyoming soon. Tommy was still happy with Roxy, who was practically bouncing outside at her desk. She was in love, as was my friend, too. As for Zoey, who knew what the future would bring for her, but I knew it wouldn’t be boring.

I took a minute to look around my vast office and commit the happy moments to memory. I had many.

“You know when I recruited you out of Yale, I thought to myself:
Now this girl is tough. She’s raw and gritty and will command a courtroom with an iron fist, and a voice to match.
I never thought you would give all of this up for love,” Raymond said as he walked over to hug and say goodbye to me.

“I’m still going to command a courtroom with an iron fist, but it just won’t be here.”

“Things won’t be the same without you around here. Hell, Zoey is leaving me too!”

“Where is she going? She didn’t tell me.” Now that was new information I wasn’t aware of. My voice almost sounded offended that I didn’t know something so important about my best friend.

“All I know is that she’s taking a page out of your handbook. She told me that she’s going to chase the wind to the west and see what happens when she gets there. Don’t ask me what that means, because I don’t have a clue. I always said she was her mother’s daughter and not mine.”

He gave me one last hug and held my hands as we both took in my now empty office.

“So once you leave here today, what will you do next? What will you become?” Raymond asked me as he closed and locked the door.

It was the easiest answer I could say.

“Happy. I will be happy.”

Saying goodbye to one life and beginning a new one was easier than I had thought it would be. Jagger made it easy by simply loving me. The night we arrived back home in Wyoming, we spent our first night as husband and wife in the home Jagger built for us. He was true to his word and carried me over the threshold, promising he would do this for as many times as I wanted him to. A rugged cowboy and a natural born romantic.

He made it his mission to christen every room in our home. I swear my man had stamina and never stopped worshipping my body with his. There would be no lovemaking under the night sky due to the season we still had to endure, so we settled under our skylight in our bedroom. Jagger made passionate love to me all throughout the night and held me for the rest.

I watched Jagger gaze up toward the stars that were shining brightly tonight. Jagger always said it was a good sign to have the stars be your light. He repositioned himself to lean on his elbow and looked directly at me.

“I want babies with you. Carry my child, Tenley, and make us a family.”

He said nothing more and put his cheek to my stomach. I wasn’t sure if I was ready to give Jagger what he wanted. Our reunion was nothing short of a miracle, and I wanted time with him before we committed ourselves to having children. He didn’t push, he just wanted me to know where his heart was leading him to next. He said he would be patient and wait for me to get there. He fell asleep soundly with his body wrapped around mine. I let out a breath and made a wish of my own and then joined my husband in sleep.

The next day was spent settling in and unpacking. Jagger was up before the dawn to begin the daily chores. He kissed me goodbye and told me that he loved me. I slept a few more hours before beginning my day.

My boxes had arrived, and I had chosen a room that would be my office. Time had flown by and it was past noon. Wendy called and asked if she could stop by. I told her yes and how I was looking forward to her visit. I managed in just a few hours to completely set-up my office. Jagger had built in bookcases that completely lined one wall. He had built me a customized desk, big enough where I could work freely with books and my computer.

“How did I get so lucky to have found him?”

“Well if you ask me, I think you both got lucky,” Wendy said.

“How are you always here when I’m talking out loud to myself, and it seems you are the only one I do this in front of?”

“I guess I’m just lucky that way, Tumbleweed.”

“I guess you are. I’m so happy to see you, Wendy. Thank you for stopping by.”

“You look good, sweet girl.”

“I’m more than good, I’m…”

“Happy?”

“Yeah, something like that.”

“Well, that’s good. I truly hope you stay that way once I give you what I have here in my bag. Come and sit with me.”

She took my hand and we sat down by my huge bay window. It would be a view I would take in every single day.

“Is everything okay, Wendy?”

“Oh yes, honey, don’t you go worrying. It’s a good thing, I’m sure of it.”

“Well if anyone knows about being right about such things, it’s you, dear friend.”

“I’m not the only one,” she said as she handed me a letter, and not just any letter, a letter from Jamie. With all that had happened since Christmas to now, I had forgotten that more letters may have existed. Wendy had said there were others, but never said how many. Now once again, my friend is passing me more words from my brother. I was almost afraid to take it, but she assured me it was something worth reading.

I ran my fingers over his handwriting. His penmanship was flawless, and I could almost picture Jamie sitting at his desk and chewing on his pen. He was the wordy one and could turn a simple sentence into a ten page essay.

My brother was known for making his point very clear until I understood the hidden messages behind his words. These letters were filled with them.

“I’ll leave you to it. See you soon.”

“You’re not going to stay?” I questioned Wendy.

“This is not my only stop. I have a few more deliveries to make.”

I started a fire and made myself comfortable on the floor surrounded by pillows. I so wanted a glass of wine right now, but we had none in the house. Jagger was adamant about me not drinking. It reminded him of a dark time in his life. I knew what he was referring to and always respected his wishes. For all that he had done for me, this request was easy.

A letter from Jamie

For my sister

Dear Tumbleweed,

If you’re reading this letter, then you must know it will be the last one you will receive. Don’t cry, baby sister, it’s a good one, I promise.

Happy Wedding Day! You see, sis? Everything always has a way of working out to God’s plan for us. I always knew you would find your way back to Jagger, and he would find his way back to you. You two are your own shape now. Fill it with happy memories to pass onto generations to come.

Writing these letters to you brought me much comfort in my final days. It was my way of saying the words I no longer could say to you in person. It would be too hard for me and even harder for you.

I was angry with God for my cancer returning, and then I quickly dismissed my anger and prayed for his mercy. God doesn’t want any of his children to suffer, and when they do it is hard on Him just as much as it is on the family the cancer affects.

I would have given just about anything to not have this happen to me, but it did and I made my peace with it. This letter would have never reached you if it wasn’t for Wendy. Wendy Ann Manning is a living Angel, and she does selfless work for others who need her. I needed her to carry out my last wishes, and she never hesitated with her answer.

Always keep her close to your heart, she deserves nothing less. She loves you Tenley as if you were her own and would do anything for you. Next time you see her, please give her a hug from me and tell her how much I love and miss her…and her pancakes!

I’ll always be watching over you. If you should ever need me, just look up to the night sky, and I will be shining on the brightest star.

One more thing…say the words I wasn’t strong enough to say to mama and daddy. Please tell them how much I love them. It is my honor to have been blessed with amazing parents. It breaks my heart to leave them and you. I love you all very much. You have made me the happiest big brother. You Chose Right!

Jamie

A letter from Jamie

For Jagger…my best friend

WITH THE EXCITEMENT over the past few weeks, I had almost forgotten about my leg and the rehab I was supposed to be doing for it. I totally skipped out on my therapy sessions, but I knew my body better than anybody. Well, that wasn’t exactly true. My girl quickly got reacquainted with it, as I did with hers. I had messages on my voicemail from Dr. Sampson’s assistant asking me to call to reschedule an appointment that I missed. I hardly felt any discomfort until today when I put in my first real day working the ranch. I was hurting pretty bad and needed a hot soak to ease the stiffness in my muscles.

I was just settling She-devil into her stall and shutting down the stables for the night when I saw a truck approaching. Other than staff, only a few people knew the gate code to enter my property, and one of them was Wendy. She beeped the horn to get my attention, but I already heard her beast of a truck a mile away.

“Hey there, cowboy, want a ride?” she called out.

I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Hey Wendy, that would be great.”

I climbed into her truck and she gave me a big welcome home hug. This was the first time I had a chance to catch up with her since our wedding in New York.

“Um…Wendy? Are we going to go?” I asked her. She looked deep in thought, and it was never a good sign when she clammed up on us. That was a sure sign that something was weighing heavily on her mind.

“Hey girl, what’s on your mind? Are you okay?” I asked.

“Oh, I’m sorry, sweets. I’m okay. I’ve had a long day myself, and I visited with your lovely bride earlier today.”

With the mention of Tenley’s name, I broke out with the biggest smile. I missed her so much today, and I couldn’t wait to get home to her.

“Did you all have a nice chat? And how many times did my name come up in the conversation?”

She smiled and I laughed with her. Women and their talks could last for hours and most of the time, they centered on men.

“Now, Jagger, you can’t expect to be the center of her universe all the time. Let the girl come up for air once in a while.”

I knew she was kidding, but her words stung a bit. Tenley was the center of my world, every last part of it, and when we married, I became hers in all ways that mattered most. Now more than ever, I wanted to see her.

“What’s up Wendy? You look like you’re a million miles away. You can tell me anything, you know that right?”

“I know that, Jagger, and please forgive me for beating around the bush. It’s just that I have something to give you.”

“Okay, what is it?”

“A letter from Jamie.” She quietly answered my question.

I knew from Tenley that Jamie had left some letters for her, and I never pressed her about them. I figured when she was ready to share them with me, she would. I never thought he would have left one for me.

“Do you have it with you now? If so, may I have it please?”

She opened her bag and handed me my letter from my best friend. I didn’t know how to explain it, but when she handed me the letter, I felt an immediate connection to it.

“Thank you, Wendy.”

“You’re welcome, Jagger, and I want you to know I gave a letter to Tenley as well. It was the very last one he had written for his sister.”

“Was she okay after you gave it to her?”

“Yes, I believe so. I gave her privacy to read it on her own, and then I came here to give you yours. I hope whatever it contains will bring you closure, peace, and understanding.”

“Thank you, Wendy, so much. You don’t know what this means to me.”

“I think I do, son. This letter is just a small part of who Jamie was. Whether it was here on earth or up in heaven, your brother will always be looking out for you. He loved you very much, and he just wanted all of you to move forward with your lives and never allow the sadness you felt over his death to hold you back. You see, Jagger, everything in this life happens for a reason. Some things we will understand and accept, and the others we will be mad as hell over. You all had to go through what you did to get here now. I’m not sure what his final words will say, but if I know anything about Jamie, I’m sure he wrote down exactly what he felt you need to hear. I was just honored to be asked to carry out his wishes. I love you, Jagger. I love my Tumbleweed, and Shane too. You are my kids, and like Jamie, I always wanted the best for you. And now that you all have it, I can finally rest easier too.”