All of You (8 page)

“All right—tell me everything!” she
demanded.

“Fine,” I said with a sigh. “But I demand a
waffle.” My sister nodded and started preparing food as I told her
about my morning.

Chapter Six

I spent the rest of New Year’s Day at home
with Rebecca and Tabitha, enjoying the day off from work and
school. We did chores around the house and ended the evening
playing several hands of Go Fish with Tabitha. As Rebecca started
Tabitha’s bedtime routine, I got out my laptop with the intent of
working on some overdue research I needed for my project but found
myself unable to concentrate on any of it. Inevitably my attention
was drawn to thoughts of Lincoln, and I realized how little I
actually knew about him, considering his notoriety. But I thought
that was maybe one of the things he liked about me. He could talk
about himself, and I didn’t already know all his facts and
details.

I looked at my phone and brought up his
texts. I smiled as I thought about how sad he looked when he
thought I had given him a fake number and then, once again,
replayed our conversation over in my head, wondering what he was
doing right now. He said he had a game in Denver tomorrow. Did that
mean he left for Denver tonight or would he fly out tomorrow? How
long did he practice before a game? Would he fly back tomorrow
night or Saturday morning?

I considered texting him and asking, but a
little worry in the back of my mind told me he would be annoyed if
I bothered him. I opened an Internet browser on my laptop and
navigated to Wikipedia. I told myself I was just going to look up
the game of hockey to learn more about it, but a half hour later I
found myself on Lincoln’s wiki page, reading his biography. I was
reading about his college stats when a voice behind me surprised
me.

“You know, if you want to know more about
him, maybe you should just ask him,” Rebecca said.

I snapped my laptop shut, and my cheeks
turned red at being caught searching for more information on
Lincoln. “I was just researching,” I lied.

“Mm-hmm. He gave you his number. He would
probably appreciate it more if you asked him instead of googling
him,” she said knowingly.

“Tabby asleep?” I asked, changing the
subject.

“Yeah. She was lights-out right away. I don’t
think she got much sleep last night.”

“That’s okay though. She’s young. Unlike you.
What time did you get in last night?” I asked her pointedly.

“Not too late. Bars were still open when I
left,” she said with a shrug.

“Did you have fun?” Rebecca didn’t get out a
lot between working and taking care of her daughter.

“Yeah. It was great to see everyone.”

“You know, if you want to go out more, you
can. I can stay home with Tabby Cat. You should get out and meet
someone. Find a guy,” I said, and she snorted.

“Yeah, I’ll get right on that,” she said
sarcastically but then turned serious. “I know you love Tabitha,
but you know she’s my responsibility, not yours. I’m the one who
should be sacrificing for her, not you.”

I looked down with uncertainty. “I thought
you liked having me here.”

“Oh, stop it, Jillian. You know we do. Tabby
and I would be lost without you, and I never want you to leave. But
you should have a life.”

“You know why I stay home, Becca. I don’t
have anyone to go out with me,” I said quietly.

“You are selling yourself short again, Jilly.
I really think you need to give Lincoln a chance.”

“I just met the man, Bec,” I said, rolling my
eyes. “Plus how do you know he’s trustworthy?” My old fears crept
back.

“I don’t,” she admitted. “The only way to
know if he’s trustworthy is for you to give him a chance. Can’t
hurt to text him.” Rebecca patted my arm, trying to encourage
me.

“What if I annoy him?”

“Don’t doubt yourself, Jilly. There is
nothing about you that is annoying.” She stood up. “All right, I’m
going to be an old lady and go to bed early. I wasn’t kidding when
I said I was hungover this morning. You’re off tomorrow,
right?”

“Yeah. You’re working eight to five?” I
double-checked even though I already knew I was watching Tabitha
tomorrow.

“Yep. All right. I’m off to bed,” Rebecca
said while walking away but then stopped and turned back. “You
really should text him.”

“Good-night, Rebecca!” I cried with a roll of
my eyes, and I heard Rebecca giggle as she walked away.

I opened my laptop back up and stared at the
picture of Lincoln in the right-hand corner of the screen that
accompanied his biography. I bit my lip nervously and swiped my
thumb over my phone. I could still text him. It wasn’t that late in
the evening. I read over our texts again for the hundredth time and
debated what to do. In the end, my old fears and doubt overwhelmed
me, and I went to bed without texting him. Even though I had told
him I just wanted friendship, I feared rejection, and I figured if
he wanted to text me, he would have. I would wait to see what
happened on Saturday.

~~~~~~~~

I woke up late the next morning and gasped
with happiness when I looked at my phone. I had a text message from
Lincoln.

“
Good morning, beautiful. How was your
night?”

I looked at the time and saw he had sent the
text twenty minutes ago. I was surprised Tabitha wasn’t awake yet.
But then again, she hadn’t gotten any sleep the night before.

“
Do you know that’s a country song?”
I
asked in reply.

“
I did indeed know that. Do you like
country?”
Lincoln’s answer came instantaneously.

“
Some of it. I like just about everything.
Except rap.”

“
Me too. Did you sleep okay? What are you
up to today?”
he asked.

“
Watching Tabby. Not sure what she wants
to do today. And yes I slept okay. You?”
I hated my reply. It
sounded too stiff. But my phone chimed back immediately.

“
I slept great. I dreamt of you.”
Lincoln replied.

I laughed.
“Liar. You did not.
lol”

“
LOL, okay you got me. But I did wake up
thinking about you.”

I bit my lip. I wanted to tell him I went to
bed thinking of him, but I didn’t want to encourage him. We could
only be friends. I sent a smiley face in reply and then asked him
about his plans for the day as I got out of bed and made my way to
the kitchen for coffee and breakfast.

“
Flight leaves in a couple of hours. Then
ice time for practice and game’s at seven.”

“
Are you excited for the game?”
I
wondered. Maybe it was all ho-hum for him by this point. He had
been playing his whole life.

“
Will you be watching?”
Lincoln
replied without answering my question.

“
I can…,”
I answered.

“
Then yes, I’m excited to play, hoping
you’ll be watching me.”

“Mommy?” Tabitha called out as she walked
into the kitchen. Her nightgown with rainbows on it was wrinkled,
and she was rubbing her eyes. Her hair was messed up in all
directions.

“Just me today, kiddo. Mommy’s at work,” I
told her. “What do you want for breakfast?”

“Waffles!” Tabitha said with too much
enthusiasm for this time of the morning.

“You just had waffles yesterday, Tabby Cat,”
I reminded her.

“But I want them again,” Tabitha said
stubbornly.

“Okay, I’ll make you waffles but you have to
eat some fruit too,” I conceded and then heard my phone chime.

“
Hello?”
Lincoln texted. He must be
wondering why I hadn’t replied.

“
Sorry, didn’t mean to ignore you. Tabby
just woke up and is demanding waffles.”

“
Ah. I was worried I scared you off again.
Didn’t mean to sound needy. Tell Tabby hi from me.”
Lincoln
replied quickly. I tried to squash the feelings of joy that came
with the idea that he needed me.

“
Will do. Have a great game. I’ll be
watching. :)”

“
Okay if I text you after the
game?”

“
Yeah that’s fine. :)”

I put my phone down with a smile and focused
on the waffles. “What do you say to ice skating today, Tabby Cat?”
I asked.

“Ooh yes! I can try my twirls again!” Tabitha
said excitedly and began collecting the ingredients for waffles. I
smiled at her involuntarily. There was absolutely nothing about
this child that I didn’t love. I was excited to take her skating,
but I was suddenly looking forward to tonight and a certain hockey
game.

After breakfast, Tabitha and I cleaned up and
got ready for a day outside on the ice. I bundled myself and
Tabitha up in our warmest clothes, grabbed our skates, and drove
down to the same pond Lincoln and I had been to yesterday. It was
crowded again today since kids were still out of school for the
holiday, but most of the people were there to play hockey.

We found a quieter spot away from the
makeshift rink, and Tabitha spent the day practicing spinning and
attempting tricks. I pulled out my phone and took pictures and
video to show Rebecca. I found a random stranger to take a picture
of Tabitha and me skating together and decided to send it to
Lincoln.

“
You’re not the only one who’s good on the
ice. :)”
I sent along with the picture. I looked at the time
and estimated he had probably just gotten to Denver. I figured he
was busy, so I put my phone away without waiting for a reply and
went back to skating with Tabitha.

It was only hours later when we had gotten
too cold and had given up for the day and were back in my car
warming up that I checked my phone and saw the text.

“
You look way better on skates than I do.
Someday I’ll have to see this in person. For now, stay warm.”
Lincoln had replied to me, and my face broke out in a smile. I
couldn’t help but feel giddy, even if he was just a friend.

“What are you looking at, Aunt Jilly?”
Tabitha said, breaking my fixation.

“A text from Lincoln. Remember him from
yesterday?”

“Yeah. He ate waffles with me. Can we have
waffles for supper, Aunt Jilly?”

This child was obsessed with waffles! “No,
Tabby Cat. You had waffles for breakfast.”

“So?” she said sweetly.

“So I can make something other than waffles.
Or we can stop and get burgers to go and take them home.”

“Can we watch a movie tonight?” she
asked.

“Not tonight, Tabby Cat. We’re watching a
hockey game on TV tonight.”

“That sounds boooooring.”

I had to giggle at Tabitha’s reaction. “Well,
you don’t have to watch it. You can do whatever you want in the
house. But I’m watching hockey.”

“Fiiiiiine,” Tabitha whined and ended the
conversation.

Later that day after we had stopped for food,
I flipped to the cable guide and found the time slot for Lincoln’s
game and set the DVR to record. I had a half hour before the game
started, so Tabitha and I sat at the kitchen island and were eating
ice cream when Rebecca got home.

“Mommy! We saved you a burger and fries!”
Tabitha announced after she hugged her mother hello.

“Burgers and fries, Jillian?” Rebecca said
disapproving of my unhealthy dinner choice for her daughter.

“Hey, it’s better than the waffles she wanted
to have. AGAIN,” I said, defending myself.

“What did you do today, Tabby Cat?” Rebecca
asked her daughter. Tabitha told her mother about the ice-skating
and showed Rebecca the picture and video on my phone.

“And tonight we have to watch a hockey game,”
Tabitha said in a disgruntled tone.

“Ooh really??” she asked, looking at me and
smiling knowingly.

“He asked me if I was going to watch—” I
started to say.

“You talk to him?” Rebecca interrupted.

I shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant. “He
texted me,” I said.

Rebecca was still holding my phone from
looking at the pictures, and she immediately brought up my text
messages and read through my conversation with Lincoln.

“This is good stuff. I think he really likes
you,” she said, causing me to sigh.

“Who likes her?” Tabitha asked.

“Nobody,” I said. “Go find something else to
do if you’re done with your ice cream and don’t want to watch
hockey.”

Tabitha scooted out of the room quickly, and
I went into the living room to watch the game with Rebecca
following behind me, still munching on her food.

~~~~~~~~

“GOOOOOOAL!!!!!” The announcer screamed at me
through the television. “And with that goal, time runs out! Denver
wins over Chicago 2-1!”

I groaned internally and flopped back on the
couch. That sucked. Lincoln and his teammates had played well, as
far as I could tell, but they just couldn’t edge out over Denver. I
wondered if Lincoln was thinking about me watching the game and
seeing them lose. I wondered what his mood would be like and if he
would still text me later like he said he would. I tried to imagine
how I would feel if that had been me that had just lost the game.
Maybe Lincoln was used to the highs and lows of his profession, but
I assumed he would be majorly pissed off at the loss. To lose
something he had worked so hard at had to be tough, even if it was
just one game out of many. I wanted to text him and tell him
something that would make him feel better, but I didn’t know what.
I thought about it for a minute and laughed to myself. I pulled out
my phone and took a selfie while making a sad duck face with pouty
lips and crossed eyes. I attached the picture to a text message and
sent it to him with the words
“Sorry for the loss.”
I hoped
he would find it funny and it would cheer him up.

Rebecca had put Tabitha to bed halfway
through the game and then retired herself shortly afterward. I
debated if I should stay up or go to bed as well. Lincoln said he
would text me after the game, but maybe he was in no mood for
conversation with me. He was probably exhausted from the game, but
the longer it took for him to reply, the more I began to panic.
Maybe he took the loss über seriously, and my picture message had
pissed him off. I looked at my text, and doubt filled my mind. I
hung my forehead in my hand and mentally berated myself. I was so
stupid! Why would he think that was funny? He was going to hate me
for making fun of his team losing the game.