A Mother's Shame (39 page)

Josh’s hands clenched into fists of rage and he turned without another word and left the room. He was just too tired and worried to argue any more tonight. But tomorrow was another day, and he was determined to find Maria and Faith at any cost.

The darkness started to recede and Maria attempted a groan but the sound stayed trapped inside her. She felt as if she was caught in a thick fog but then she became aware of voices and deliberately lay as still as she could.

‘She should be awake by now. ’Appen yer overdid it a bit wi’ that laudanum. How much did she ’ave?’

‘Only enough to keep ’er quiet durin’ the journey.’

Maria recognised the last voice as Lennie’s and her blood ran cold. Why was he there – and where was she? The voices continued in a faint mumble – they were obviously some way away from her now – and then she heard the sound of a door opening and shutting and a key in a lock. And then there was silence. She attempted to open her eyes, ignoring the dull ache in her head, and eventually she managed it. Then turning her head she tried to focus, and slowly the room swam into view. There were a number of metal beds, covered in thin grey blankets, all in a row, and a large window at one end of the room which was bare of curtains of any kind. The whole room appeared to be bare from what she could see of it, and she realised with sickening awareness that she was in one of the servants’ rooms at Hatter’s Hall.

Maria made a huge effort to rise, but managed to get her head no more than two or three inches off the pillow before she flopped back. Her arms and legs did not seem to be doing as she was telling them either and she took a deep breath as she tried to stem the panic that was threatening to overtake her. Perhaps if she just lay still for a while the dizziness would pass? But why was she here? And then it all came back to her. She had been waiting for Josh to get the luggage and Jacobs had approached her. She cursed herself for a fool for going with him and trusting him as she had. She should have waited for Josh. But where was Faith? What had they done with the baby? Tears squeezed out of the corners of her eyes and trickled down her cheeks as she thought of the child. She was so small and defenceless, and she had let her down.

Soon a tingling started in her fingers and her toes, and after a time she found that she could flex them. Very slowly the movement returned to her limbs and painfully she dragged herself to the edge of the ticking mattress. It was then that she noticed that her beautiful travelling costume, her last present from Esperanza, was gone and she was dressed in the dull grey clothing of the servants. She had given all of Isabelle’s clothes to Kitty before leaving Tasmania, for she had found that she couldn’t bring herself to wear them. Someone must have undressed her whilst she was unconscious. The thought made colour flood into her cheeks but that was the least of her worries for now. Somehow she had to find Faith and get out of this dreadful place.

She made a second attempt to sit, but the blood pounded in her ears and the dizziness returned tenfold, so she closed her eyes again and clung to the edge of the bed until the nausea passed. At last she was able to stand, and wobbling dangerously on legs that felt like jelly, she made it to the window and grasped the sill. She found that she was in a room at the back of the Hall overlooking the laundry rooms. Through the windows she could see women flitting about like ants in the steamy atmosphere and her heart plummeted. It was common knowledge that many had come here as mere girls and never got out again. Many had died there, old before their time, worn out with work and the harsh treatment they had endured. What would she do if no one came to claim her? And what would happen to Faith? Would they too become victims of this dreadful place?

She was still leaning heavily on the sill when she heard the sound of the key grating in the lock again and, turning, she saw Mrs Bradshaw enter the room with a tray.

‘Ah, so you’re finally awake again then,’ the Matron said sternly. ‘I was beginning to think we were going to have to throw a bucket of water over you to rouse you.’

‘What am I doing here?’ Maria asked. ‘And where is the baby?’

‘You’re here because there are those who want you to disappear,’ the woman answered, jangling her big iron ring of keys. ‘And as for the baby – she’s up in the nursery with the other unfortunate little brats. If she’s lucky we’ll find a home for her. If not, she’ll stay where she is till she’s old enough to work here.’

Maria was appalled and it showed on her face as she looked around wildly for a way of escape.

‘Don’t get thinking of trying to run away again,’ Mrs Bradshaw warned. ‘There is no way out of this place, as many before you have discovered. You may as well make your mind up to the fact that you’re here for good. But now I’ve brought you some food and you would do well to eat it. You’ll need to get your strength up, because you’ll be working tomorrow. You are not pandering to gentry this time around so you’ll be treated no different from the rest of the servants.’ At this she turned and left, locking the door behind her.

As Maria finally accepted what a terrible plight she was in, despair washed through her. Crossing back to the bed, she sank onto the edge of it and began to cry helplessly.

Charles and Helena were already at breakfast when Josh joined them the next morning feeling considerably refreshed after some sleep.

His mother gave him a watery smile and Josh noticed that she had barely eaten anything. In truth, his appetite had fled too but nevertheless he forced himself to fill his plate from the silver dishes on the sideboard. He needed the energy to continue his search for Maria and his niece.

‘I have purchased a factory in Atherstone,’ his father informed him, as if this was just an ordinary day. ‘And I thought you might like to ride in with me and take a look at it this morning.’

‘I’m afraid I have other plans,’ Josh answered quietly as he folded a napkin across his lap.

‘I hope you’re not planning on going off on a wild-goose chase looking for that . . . that Mundy girl!’ Charles said scathingly. ‘She will no doubt be happily ensconced in some whorehouse in Portsmouth by now, selling her body to any sailor who will pay for it.’

Josh angrily pushed his plate away and stood up, ready to defend Maria’s honour. Seeing that a row was about to erupt, Helena cried, ‘Oh,
please
don’t argue. It cannot make the situation any better.’ And then turning her attention to her husband, she told him, ‘I’m sure that isn’t true, Charles. Maria did not seem to be that sort of girl at all. She comes from a very respectable family. Her father is the chapel preacher, for heaven’s sake!’

Josh managed to remain silent as he marched out of the room, but his heart was thudding so loudly he feared that they might hear it. What if Maria
was
ensconced in some whorehouse! Not by choice –
never
by choice – but many girls had ended up in such places after being abducted against their will, and Maria was a pretty girl. Should some pimp have happened upon her while she stood waiting for him on the quay, she would have been a sitting target. And Faith – well, there were any number of moneyed folk who would buy a baby, especially one as comely as she. His heart broke at the thought and he cursed himself for ever letting them out of his sight for a second. But what was done was done, and now he was determined to find them both, even if it took to the end of his days. There was no point standing there quarrelling with his father; Lennie had obviously done a good job when he had dripped his lies into Charles Montgomery’s ear.

He had gone no more than a few steps along the hallway when the dining-room door banged open and his mother came rushing after him, calling, ‘Josh? Spare me a few minutes, I beg you. We can talk in here.’ Taking his elbow she pushed him into the drawing room and after closing the door behind her she asked him straight out: ‘Tell me truthfully, my dear boy: is the child Isabelle’s or Maria’s?’

He looked straight into her eye as he replied without hesitation, ‘The baby is Isabelle’s, Mother, and it was her last wish that Maria and I should bring her home for you to care for her.’

‘Oh.’ Helena chewed on her knuckle. She knew her son inside out and was convinced that he was telling the truth. Her grandchild, who was all she had left of Isabelle now, was out there somewhere, possibly in danger, and suddenly her need to find Faith was as compelling as Josh’s.

‘I believe you, son,’ she told him. ‘But why would that young man have come here yesterday with such a cock and bull story?’

‘Because Maria rejected him.’ A muscle in Josh’s cheek twitched as his hands clenched into fists and he quickly told his mother everything.

When he was done, Helena nodded. It all made sense now. ‘Then somehow we must find both the baby and Maria,’ she said. Then, after a slight hesitation, ‘Is it true that you have feelings for her?’

He sighed. ‘Yes, it’s true. I’m sorry, Mother. I know that you and Father had high hopes of me and Felicity coming together one—’

She held up her hand then and stopped him from going any further, saying, ‘This is another thing that I needed to speak to you about. You see, whilst you’ve been away, there have been certain . . . developments.’

When he raised an eyebrow in enquiry she explained, ‘I’m afraid Mrs Pettifer passed away shortly after you departed for Australia. It was not entirely unexpected, for as you know she had been an invalid for a great many years. Anyway, a couple of months after her death, Felicity met a young man from Nottingham when she had a day trip there. And to cut a long story short . . . she has married him after a rather whirlwind romance.’

‘Really?’ Josh whistled through his teeth. ‘That couldn’t have gone down very well with her old man.’

‘Actually, he was very good about it,’ she confided. ‘As you know, Felicity was always rather spoiled by her mother, and between you and me I think her father was just grateful to see her settled. He’s bought them a small house up there by all accounts, and apparently Felicity is as happy as the day is long.’

‘Then I am pleased for her,’ Josh said sincerely. ‘But I still can’t see my father accepting Maria because she comes from a lower class than us.’

‘Your father is a frightful snob; he’s stuck in the past and needs to start changing with the times,’ his mother answered, shocking her son to the roots. ‘He was hardly born into the aristocracy himself!’ And then she shocked him still further when she said, ‘We
shall
find the baby and when we do, I shall bring her home and she will be brought up in her rightful place – with her family – whether your father likes it or not!’

He stared at her with his mouth hanging slackly open. Was this the same woman who had always meekly obeyed her husband? Until she had helped Isabelle to escape from Hatter’s Hall he had never known his mother to say a wrong word to Charles, but now it seemed that the worm was finally turning.

‘Father will never accept Faith,’ he said eventually.

‘Then we shall have to part, shan’t we,’ Helena said quietly, ‘because by hook or by crook, I shall keep my daughter’s child with me even if it means I have to leave this place. But now, no more talking. Where do you think we should start to look?’

‘I don’t know,’ Josh admitted despondently.

‘Then in that case may I suggest that you visit Maria’s mother again. There is just a chance that Maria may have returned, and if she has, she would have gone there. If this is not the case, we should then track down the despicable Lennie Glover. I have a horrible feeling that he may know more about their disappearance than he is letting on.’

‘But what about Father?’

‘You leave your father to me,’ she told him abruptly. ‘It is high time he heard a few home truths and I have a distinct feeling that he isn’t going to like it.’

‘Very well.’ Josh kissed his mother’s cheek before hurrying away to get his coat. The sooner he could resume the search the better.

Edward plucked at the eiderdown with his good hand as Martha plumped up his pillows. He knew that there was something amiss, since he had overheard her talking to someone in the front parlour the night before. However, the stroke had robbed him of his speech and he was unable to ask her who it had been.

‘There,’ she said as she straightened up and looked down on him. ‘You are all comfortable again for a while now.’ The words were said kindly, but what she was thinking was,
How are the mighty fallen.

Edward was a mere shadow of the man he had once been. One side of his face was drawn down, giving him a deformed appearance, and his tongue hung slackly from his mouth as it drooled onto his nightshirt. He was completely paralysed all down his left side and the right side had only limited movement, which meant she now had to see to all his bodily needs. It wouldn’t have been so bad if he had shown one ounce of gratitude, but that would have been expecting too much of Edward. Even now in his weakened condition his dark eyes still glowed with malice, and more than once he had tried to hit her, or thrown his dish aside as she was trying to feed him. But Martha knew that she could have stood all this if he had just once in the time they had been together shown her a little kindness or consideration. He had treated her as little more than a skivvy since the day they had stood before the altar, and she had accepted her lot because she had felt that she deserved no better. She had been carrying another man’s child, after all, and so she had felt a measure of gratitude that Edward had consented to make an honest woman of her and give her unborn child a name.

That child had been Maria, and she had adored her from the day she drew breath whilst still trying to be a good obedient wife to Edward. But then she had discovered that Edward had been paid to take her, and from that day on she had felt belittled. He had despised Maria from the second he set eyes on her, and had made it more than apparent. And now her beloved girl was missing and Martha was almost beside herself with worry. Knowing her daughter as she did, she knew that Maria would never have willingly run away, and a sense of foreboding had settled around her like a cloud ever since Lennie Glover had come to her with his wild tales. She had been thrown into further confusion following Josh’s visit, and now she felt helpless, so she was in no mood for one of Edward’s tantrums.