39 Weeks (26 page)

‘I know. You’re right. I keep telling myself that over and over, but
it’s not working
I’m still worrying. Will you be able to skive off next week and come with me to the scan again?’

‘Course I will. When is it?’

‘Wednesday morning.’

‘Okay I’ll be there.’

I felt slightly better knowing Shelley would be there when they gave me the bad news, if they gave me the bad news. I’ll be glad whe
n next Wednesday
’
s come and gone, a
t least I’ll know for sure then and can stop stressing about ‘if’ all the time. Of course if it is bad news I’ll have to start worrying about how the hell I’m going to manage. The thought of me looking after one little baby was frightening enough, but looking after two . . at the same time . . on my own. Oh God why? Why couldn’t I have just stuck to my guns and had nothing to do with men
, especially one’s of the twonk variety. Then none of this would be happening, I wouldn’t be pregnant, I wouldn’t be having scans, I wouldn’t have had to lie to my mum, I wouldn’t be worrying, and I wouldn’t have a broken foot.

At clocking off time I waited for the mass ex
odus to be over before attempting the stairs, coming up wasn’t so bad but going down was painful and slow, although I was getting a bit quicker at it than I had been first thing this morning. Rob was waiting for me in the car park, just sitting in his car reading a magazine as if he’d been there for a whil
e, but when he saw me he threw
the magazine on the back seat and got out to help me.

‘How did it go?’ he said starting the engine.

‘It was okay.’

‘And how’s the foot?’

‘Throbbing a bit actually, but I have
had to hobble around all day
so . . ‘

‘
You should put it up tonight, rest and stay off it as much as possible.’

‘That’s the plan.’

‘Good. Do you need anything?’

‘Um . . ‘

‘From the shop or anything, we could stop off on the way home.’

‘Oh, no I don’t need anything thanks.’

We lapsed into silence and twenty
minutes later pulled up in Kingsley Road to find James parked outside number five.

‘Ah I see the Chippendale’s here.’ Rob
said as we pulled in behind him.

Rob got out and walked round to my side to help me out, and James got out of his car and stood watching and waiting for Ro
b to hand me over. I felt like the baton
in some weird relay race or something. They eyed each other warily but neither spoke, well not
to each other. Rob said to me ‘s
ee you in the morning’ and I said
‘
o
kay
’, then he locked his car and went straight in.

‘Are you alright?’
James said when Rob had gone and
he got the full-
on walking wounded, leaning on a crutch picture.

‘I’m fine.’

‘So what’s with lover-boy, what were you doing in his car? Though you were probably safer in it than out here while he played target practise.’

‘He’s giving me a lift to work and picking me up after until I can drive again
. Can we go in?’ I said moving towards the front door.

‘Here this’ll be quicker.’ James said as he picked me up and carried me through the door, along the hall, and up the stairs.
I had the distinct feeling that it was more for Rob’s benefit who might have been watching
from inside through the window,
than it was to look after me
, and of course there was an element of me Tarzan you Judy about it that I guess was supposed to impress me, but actually was just really embarrassing.

‘Okay you can put me down now.’ I said when we got to the top of the stairs.

I let
us in and James told me to sit
while he went straight to the kitchen to make
some
tea.
‘So what exactly happened?’ he shouted from the kitchen.

I told him. I was getting a bit tired of telling the same story over and over, that wasn’t James’s fault of course, but every time I’d had to tell the story
it
got a bit shorter, and was now down to the edited highlights.

‘How long are you going to have it strapped up like that?’

‘I’ve got to go to outpatients tomorrow, so they can check if the swellings gone down
. I’m hoping it has and that I won’t need it all bandaged up like this anymore.’ I said as he put two mugs of tea on the coffee table, and settled himself on the settee next to me.

‘And the crutch?’

‘Well they said it would probably take two or three weeks before I could put any weight on it.’

‘So he’s going to be
driving you to and from work
for the next three weeks?’

‘Yes I guess so.’ I said leaning forward to reach my tea, but James pre-empted my attempt and handed it to me.

‘I don’t like it.’

‘
What?
’

‘I don’t like him hanging around all the time, and now he’s got the perfect excuse hasn’t he.’

‘Are you saying he ran over my foot on purpose so he’d have a reason to see me?’

‘No, not
on purpose
maybe
,
but
still
it does mean he can see you every day
doesn’t it.’

‘For God’s sake, it was an accident and now he feels guilty so he’s just trying to help.’

‘Mm well I don’t like it.’ James whined.

‘Oh well if I’d known that I wouldn’t have accepted a lift from him, I’d have just stayed trapped at home for the next few weeks until my foot got better.’ I said sarcastically.

‘You know what I mean.’

‘No not really.’

‘I mean I don’t like you spending time with him.’

‘Well tough
it’s not up to you is it? It’s not your foot that’s broken.’ I said putting my tea down as it was in danger of slopping everywhere as I
was starting to get angry
.
‘I think you should go.’

‘Go?’

‘Yes go. I’m really tired and I think you should go.’

‘It’s him isn’t it, you still like him don’t you
?’

‘It’s not him, it’s not anyone. Please James just go home.’

‘Okay I’ll go if you kiss me goodbye.’

‘Are you joking?’

‘No I’m not joking, one kiss that’s all, just so you know what you’re missing after I’ve gone.’

‘James . .’

‘I’m only asking for a kiss, it can’t hurt can it, and you never know you might see me in a whole different light afterwards.’

‘One kiss?’

‘Yes.’

‘And then you’ll go home?’

‘Yes.’

‘Okay.’

He stood up and helped me
to
stand up
next to him
, obviously it was going to be as passionate an embrace as he could
make it. I braced mys
elf. I mean I did like him,
he was a nice guy, a
nd he liked me that was obvious, and
I owed it to myself, and to him, to find out if I could ever feel anything more than just friendship for him.

He pulled me in close to him and bent his head towards mine, then kissed me softly at first and then more fiercely when I didn’t pull away. I have to admit it wasn’t the worst kiss I’ve ever had, on a scale of one to ten it was easily a seven, but there was no spark, no tingle. I kissed him back, I was really trying to get into it, but it was no use, it just didn’t hit
the mark, not for me, well not enough for me. My knees did sag a little but they didn’t buckle if you know what I mean.

We pulled apart and looked at each other. James smiled at me smugly as if he knew he’d got me now, after that kiss how could any girl resist
,
his smile said.

How deluded can you be? I mean was it just because he wanted it to work so much, or was it
that
macho male ego rearing its ugly head making him think his kiss had melted my resistance
. Either way he was wrong, I was as determined as ever that this relationship was going nowhere.

‘Okay I’m gonna go. No don’t say anything.’ He said, but I hadn’t been going to say anything. ‘Sweet dreams Babe.’ And with that parting shot he left.

Even if I hadn’t had any doubts before, and I had plenty, then that ‘Babe’ would have finished me off. Babe! I was not going to be called Babe
by anyone
, no way.

19
th
October -
Week 20
+ 3
Days

This was the day I’d been waiting for, scan day. I’d
so wanted it to be scan
day ever since the doctor had said the only way to be sure if it was or wasn’t twins was with the second scan, and now that day was here. I had barely slept at all last night, and when I did doze off it was to dream about me trying to look after about fifteen babies
all at once
, all crying. I shuddered again at the thought.

My appointment was at ten, but after the last time and all that hanging about
,
I’d arranged with Shelley that we’
d get there early
so she was picking me up at about a quarter to nine.
I checked the clock again and i
t was still only about twenty five to
,
so I made myself another cuppa while I waited. Once again they’d told me i
t would be better if I had a full bladder, so once again I was trying not to think about going to the loo.

I hadn’t heard from James again since that kiss. I wasn’t quite sure what to expect,
I knew
he’d
either
be all over me like a rash or leave me alone altogether and wait for me to make the next move. The look on his face that night had clearly said that he thoug
ht the kiss would be the clincher to our getting together
, he was so obviously cocky and confident about the whole thing as he said goodbye, no do
ubt he thought
at that moment anyway,
that
I’d be throwing myself at his feet, putty in his hands.
What he was thinking now though was anybody’s guess after a week
had
gone by and I still hadn’t phoned him,
probably
he wasn’t quite so confident. Good. That Babe remark was still
irritating
me.

At five to
nine
I got a call from Shelley to say she was really sorry but she couldn’t get the car started, and I’d better
try and
get there without her. Damn, that meant I’d have to ask Rob. Well he did say wherever I wanted to go.

We still weren’t saying much every morning and every evening. It was all very polite of course but still awkward. Last night I’d said I wouldn’t need a lift this morning as I was going to the hospital, and he’d just grunted a polite okay.
And n
ow I was going to have to ask him for a favour which I really didn’t want to have to do.

When I knocked
he answered the door
wearing boxers and an old tee shirt promoting some pre-historic rock concert from 2001, that was so stretched and twisted it would have fit someone twice his size
, and he had serious bed hair, or in his case couch hair
. Clearly he hadn’
t got around to
getting dressed yet as he was not
required for chauffeuring duty
this morning. I explained about Shelley not being able to make it and he straight away said he’d take me, ev
en before I asked. H
e was so nice about everything, so
accommodating. It would have been so much easier to hate him if he’d been a bastard, and I wanted to hate him. I didn’t need any more complications in my life.

He asked me in and told me to wait while he got dressed. ‘Make yourself a coffee while you wait, I won’t be long,’ he said, so I explained about the full bladder thing and that I daren’t have any more tea or coffee
, that he thought was highly amusing.
Yeah pregnant women bursting for the l
oo is always good for a laugh. S
o he wasn’
t a hundred percent perfect
.

I sat on Marsha’s couch feeling uncomfortable while he darted about
looking for clothes that were strewn around the living room. Marsha was out, on the playgroup run I guessed, so it was just the two of us. While he was in the bathroom and I waited for him, I fretted some more about the outcome of the scan, praying again to the God of misfortune to please, just this once, give me a break.

Ten minutes later he was back, looking immaculate and a million miles away from the half asleep wreck who’d answered the door earlier. ‘Are you okay?’ he said seeing my worried faraway expression. ‘It’
s not painful
is it this scan?’