Authors: Terri Douglas
En route to the kitchen a
mid the eclectic pile of bric-a-brac littering her usual bomb site living room, I spied a photo of her and Rob and another guy, probably a friend or relation,
hanging on the wall along with several others.
There was one of the
children
but a bit younger than they were now
, another with the same gu
y again and
the children, and Rob and the guy on their own. In all of them they were all smiling happily, but they would wouldn’t they, in a photo anyway, you’d hardly be likely to hang photo’s of family
or friends
looking ticked off or fed up. Sh
e noticed me looking and said ‘t
hat’s Mac and my brother
when we took the kids for a day out to
Chessington zoo
last summer. It was a good day at least u
ntil Flora threw up all over everyone
on the way home’. Mm I thought as we continued to the kitchen, so he does spend some time with his family then.
‘So how have you been?’ She said flicking on the kettle, clearing the table, and piling dishes in the sink, all in one seemingly fluid action.
‘I’m okay, bit tired after work, you know.’
‘Yes don’t I just. I’m glad I’m not doing the nine to five anymore.’
‘Don’t you miss it, I mean going to work and everything, getting out, meeting people, and all that?’
‘No not at all. All that back biting and one up stuff, no I don’t miss that. Mind
you
there’s plenty of back biting and one up going on between o
ther mums, you know who’s kid was
potty trained first, and who’s
was youngest to drink out of a cup,
that sort of thing
.’
‘Really?’
‘Oh yes, it can get very competitive.’
Marsha said handing me a mug of tea, and settling herself with her mug of coffee at the now cleared and wiped down table.
‘I had no idea.’
I said sitting down opposite her.
‘It’s all stupid if you ask me, what difference does it make really if little Jimmy, or whoever, starts drinking out of a proper cup at twenty six weeks or a hundred and twenty six weeks. Kids will do things when they’re ready and not a day before, no matter how hard you try to push them. It’s no wonder so many adults are so screwed up, they probably had really pushy mums who had them potty
trained before they could walk . . . d
on’t get me started, once I get on to the subject of scary mothers there’s no stopping me and I could rant on for hours.
So you all unpacked and everything?
’
‘Yes all unpacked. Thanks for all that baby stuff, I really appreciate it.’
‘No trouble and like I said you’re doing me a favour. So you met Rob
then
?’
‘Yes. Does he work away a lot?’
‘Sometimes, depends a bit on what he’s offered and if he’s
feeling
up to a trip or not.’
She was so, I don’t know . . upbeat I suppose you could describe it, when she said this, that it was obvious to me
she’d long since come to terms w
ith his going away all the time, and maybe about
all
his affairs
as well
.
‘When’s he due back this time?’ I asked needing to know so I could be sure I wouldn’t run into him if I could possibly avoid it.
‘Not sure, depends on how the job goes, probably the weekend. So what’s the story with this guy who helped you move and carried all the baby stuff upstairs?’
‘James? He’s a friend that’s all.’
‘A friend? Rob got the idea he was a bit more than that, said he got a bit territorial the other day when he caught him upstairs.’
‘He’s just a friend, but . .’
‘But he’d like to be more?’
‘Yes, I keep telling him but . . I know he likes me and I suppose expecting a baby and everything I should be grateful that anyone’s interested, but I don’t . .’
‘You don’t fancy him.’
‘No, I like him and we get on
, and I’ve even told him it’s never going to be anything more than just friends, but he won’t take no for an answer, he says he’ll take his chances.’
‘Yeah Rob said he seemed a bit intense. What about the father do you still see him?’
‘
No, like I told you
he was a one night mistake, a big mistake as it turned out. I don’t ever want to see him again.’ Which was ironic really as I was seeing his identical twin brother a couple of times a week, but of course I didn’t say that to Marsha.
‘Well maybe you’ll grow to like this James, maybe he’ll wear you down in the end.’
‘Maybe.’ I said but what I thought was ‘I don’t think so’.
The television programme finished and Marsha was right about world war three breaking out, it did. So I made a tactful retreat and went upstairs
to my peaceful haven
.
James came round on Thursday and we ended up watching a film, some bloke thing all macho men trying to outdo each other, I can’t even remember what it was called and fell asleep half way through, that’s how good it was. And on Sunday he took me out for lunch, he probably figured there was more chance I’d actually stay awake if he saw me in the day time, but he didn’t come back to mine after, said he had something on. But that was alright I had something of my own on anyway, like dozing off in front of the telly watching the re-run of X Factor, damn Martin and his bloody addiction to this banal programme, he’d got me watching it now.
That was a week ago and Rob s
troke Mac hadn’t come back on the
weekend, so maybe living upstairs wasn’t going to be as bad as I’d first thought if he was going to be away most of the time. It still burned me up that I’d been sucked in by his Mr Wonderful persona and that he was cheating on Marsha, but when all was said and done it was none of my b
usiness really, and as long as he stayed out of my
way, well he could do what he wanted I suppose.
T
his morning I had another check up, God these monthly check up’s
were coming round quickly. Everything was okay, still all normal, the nurse still as patronising as ever. Only one more week until my second scan and finding out if I was having twins. My fingers were almost
permanently
welded together in
a
crossed position, and the nearer it got
to the scan date
the more I worried.
It was exactly this that caused the accident, well sort of. I was fretting as usual
and wasn’t concentrating properly as I got out of my car when I got home, so I didn’t see anyone else pulling up until it was almost too late. I tried to move out of the way but didn’t move quite fast enough or far enough
,
and the other car ended up running over my foot.
It was all over so quickly it took me a minute to work out what had happened. One minute I was feeling relieved to be home and trying to
stop myself
worrying about the possibility of twins
, after all worrying about it wasn’t going to make any difference, and the next minute I was hoping around groaning in agony.
The driver of the other car got out and rushed over to me to see if I was alright. It was Rob back from his trip.
‘I’m so sorry, are you alright?’ He said looking as shaken as I felt.
‘I think so.’
‘I’m really sorry, I just didn’t see you. Here sit down a minute.’ And he ease
d me down to sit on the curb, and
sat
himself
down next to me.
Then Marsha c
ame out to see what was going on
.
‘What happened?’ she said worriedly.
‘It was all my fault.’ Rob said. ‘Judy was crossing but I didn’t see her, I’ve been driving all day to get home and I
was tired and I
just . . then next thing I know I felt this bump and . .
thank God it was only her
foot.
’
‘Only my . .!’
‘Sorry I didn’t mean that the way it sounded, I just meant thank goodness I didn’t hit you properly.’
‘No you just broke my foot, s
o that’s alright.’
I said
acerbically
, taking my shoe off to get a better look.
‘Sorry I’m really sorry.’
‘You better take her to the hospital.’ Marsha said.
‘No there’s no need for that.’ I said even though I was in agony. I really wasn’t up for a trip to the hospital, especially with Rob, broken foot or not.
‘Yes, you really should go. Help me Marsha, help me get her in the car.’
‘No really I’ll be fine.’
I said
,
but I was wasting my breath.
‘You need to know if anything’s broken.’
He said helping me get back on
my one goo
d foot and taking my bag and
shoe from me.
Then with one arm
each
around
Rob and Marsha
I
hoped the few short hops to Rob’s
car
.
They settled me in the passenger seat
and
Rob
dumped my bag and shoe on my lap, then ran round to the driver’s side
and we drove off in the direction of the hospital. We didn’t speak for the fifteen minutes or so that it took to get there, and Rob parked right outside the entrance to A and E.
‘I’ll go and see if I can get a wheel chair or something
,
just stay right there
, don’t move
.’ He said getting out of the car.
‘Yeah.’ I muttered to myself. ‘Ok
ay I’ll do that, like I have a
choice.’
He threw me a guilty look, obviously I hadn’t muttered it quietly enough, and ran inside.
Two minutes later he came back, not with a wheelchair, more cut backs I suppose, but he did have someone else with him, one of the hospital porters, and between them they helped me
hop to the waiting area inside, Rob carrying my bag and shoe again for me.
They sat me down on the nearest empty seat and Rob disappeared again presumably to give them all my details. Well this was just great, here I was trying my best to stay out of his way and now I was stuck here for who knew how long, you know what A and E is like, all on my own with him. Maybe we could have a cosy little chat about how many times he’d ‘scored’
this week, or what a nice person Marsha was and ho
w easy it was to lie to her, added to which
my foot was really hurting now.
‘They said you shouldn’t have to wait too long.’ He said when he got back.
He still had my bag and my shoe in his hand but this time he held on to them instead of giving them back to me.
I looked round the waiting area which was fairly packed with the not too seriously wounded like myself, some quietly bleeding and some just in pain
.
‘W
ell I hope it won’t be too long. H
ow are you feeling now?’ He asked looking concerned.
‘Like I’ve broken my foot.’
‘I’m so sorry, I just didn’t see you.’
‘Yeah you said.’ I said flippantly.
‘Do you think it is broken?’
‘I don’t know, it feels like it.’
Despite my foot hurting like hell, I was quite enjoying watching him squirm.
‘Should I let anyone know, your mum, or that bloke?’
‘You mean James?’
‘Yes him.’
‘No.’
‘What about your mother?’
‘Definitely not.’
The last thing I wanted at this moment was Mum turning up telling me how irresponsible I was and making me feel like this was all my fault somehow. Then knowing her she’d start organising the hospital staff, or trying
to
anyway, and complaining that I wasn’t being looked at quickly enough. And then there was the whole Rob thing. I mean she still thought Rob was the father, can you imagine that conversation if she turned up and
he was
here
waiting with me. It just doesn’t bear thinking about.
No definitely did not want to see Mum at this moment.
‘Do you think you’ll be alright for a minute, only I really
should
go and move the car?’
‘Yes I’m fine, go.’
‘Okay I’ll be as quick as I can.’ And he ran out the entrance,
s
till holding my bag and my shoe, e
vidently he’d been holding them so long he’d forgotten
, and
gave
me a last quic
k glance before disappearing.
It was nearly
a
quarter of an hour before he came back again, and I’d started to think he’d just run away altogether, but apparently it was visiting hours so the car park was full and he’d ended up having to park down some side street off the hospital grounds, and then had to run back.
And j
udging by his heavy breathing
as he flopped down on the seat next to me,
it had been some distance.
I noticed h
e no longer had my bag or
my shoe with him, probably
he’d
left them
in his car. At least I hoped that was it
and he hadn’t just lost them somewhere in his panic
.