12 Good Reasons to Look Up Uranus (24 page)

Lucky sausage:
Chorizo

Lucky olives:
Kalamata

C
ANCER

The start of this week may bring you some significant opportunities, as a fabulous aspect between the Sun and Saturn accompanies the Full Moon, your ruler. This couldn’t
happen at a better time for you, with Mars filling you with ideas for the future and giving you the energy to try the break-dancing moves you’ve been practising in front of the bedroom mirror
before the office party next week.

Lucky lamp:
Lava

Lucky Psalm:
XLV

L
EO

On Monday, the Leo Full Moon could see you falling head over heels in love, or in some other way it could be a very emotional time. When it appears, your initial excitement
means you could come over altruistic. You may very well be carried away – possibly an alien abduction – but it’s much more likely to be Pixies again.

Lucky guess:
Plutarch

Lucky garnish:
Chives

V
IRGO

On Friday, the Sun challenges your ruler and the interesting asteroid known as Chiron in a celestial position known as the ‘wheelbarrow’. Don’t look, it will
only upset you. The weekend will bring good news about your new gazebo. There may well be a misunderstanding with the man who delivers it when he asks if you want decking.

Lucky force:
Air

Lucky soup:
Carrot and coriander

L
IBRA

Never the most decisive of people. Pluto enters your seventh house this week and with it comes one of the most difficult dilemmas you have ever faced. Ultimately, your choice
will decide the outcome of the ever-sensitive peace talks between the Barry Manilow fan club and the Ministry of Food and Fisheries. A roll of greaseproof paper will prove even more useful than you
could have imagined.

Lucky snack:
Anchovies

Lucky port:
Tawny

S
CORPIO

An offhand remark could lead to problems on Wednesday. It had become accepted practice to poke fun at the people who visit your local pub to sell copies of the
War Cry
magazine. What you may not know is that the local citadel has been taken over by the Militant Wing of the Salvation Arms, who’s Christianity is an altogether more muscular brand. On a
positive note, the tambourine will still be playable after removal.

Lucky hymn:
152 –
Fight the good fight

Lucky cushion:
Soft

S
AGITTARIUS

In recent weeks you have been tied up much more than you normally enjoy. If you’ve been feeling constrained, you will begin to shake off any fetters and start to feel a
real sense of freedom, so it may well be worth reconsidering renewing your monthly membership to Tracy’s Dungeon.

Lucky chain:
Bicycle

Lucky lock:
Teddington

C
APRICORN

The Sun moving into your birthsign brings with it a sense of serenity you have not experienced for many months. It seems that nothing can upset your feeling of wellbeing until
Tuesday when a close relative is injured by a falling tree during a flight to Bucharest. On Friday the heel will come off of your best dancing shoes during a vigorous gavotte.

Lucky yoghurt:
Rhubarb

Lucky block:
Breeze

A
QUARIUS

Contract negotiations are likely be to the fore this week. On Monday, you will be aware that you are getting some funny looks during a particularly intense negotiation session
after you have been chewing the end of your red-pen. Following the meeting, you will discover that the pen has leaked, leaving you looking like a post-rampage Hannibal Lecter.

Lucky attitude:
Devil-may-care

Lucky solvent:
Nail polish remover

P
ISCES

This week, you are starting to give some thought to what to buy your nearest and dearest for Christmas. When a remark is casually dropped into the conversation about
‘getting something romantic to light up an evening’, scented mood-candles would probably be a better received gift than a two-cylinder diesel, ten-horsepower, mobile lighting generator
and gantry on a stainless steel trailer.

Lucky stance:
Defensive

Lucky mood:
Contrite

A
RIES

Mars brings a new sense of energy and dynamism to Aries this week. However, a little caution should be exercised at the staff Christmas party on Friday when a particularly
lively impersonation of Pete Townshend may leave you with a nasty case of ‘Air Guitar Elbow’, which if it not treated properly may spread and leave you looking like Iggy Pop.

Lucky bandage:
Triangular

Lucky evidence:
Photographic

T
AURUS

You’re in a creative mood. If at all possible, you are not interested in daydreams. Putting ideas into practice is your way, and this week should see you well on the way
to success with one practical and imaginative project. Don’t be too impatient with it; a scale-model of the Home-Secretary made out of Meccano is a tough and unrewarding job.

Lucky pill:
Iron

Lucky plaster:
Waterproof

G
EMINI

If you are involved in any kind of joint venture at the minute, you should stick to this principle even more resolutely. There is a good market for hip-replacements right now,
and even though you have no experience in orthopaedic surgery, your can-do attitude will win you a lot of admirers.

Lucky insurance:
Professional indemnity

Lucky premises:
Temporary

C
ANCER

The influence of Uranus fills the air with a sense of foreboding over the next few days. Consider changing your curtains before the worst happens. Wednesday’s aspect
between Venus and Neptune will probably mean that you will have a misunderstanding involving brown paper at the post-office. A man with a sticky handshake and a twitch may try to sell you a vampire
costume.

Lucky tipple:
Calvados

Lucky container:
Tupperware

L
EO

You are entering a very favourable time. Whether you are involved in work, domestic matters, or learning and education, this week gives you the chance top put yourself right on
top of a situation when you join an acrobatic act at a touring circus. A leotard fitting may go horribly wrong on Wednesday, but nature, in her wisdom, provided you with two of the most vital
things, so losing one will not be the blow it might have been.

Lucky coating:
Artex

Lucky fluff:
Navel

V
IRGO

Wednesday and Thursday will be days when you can forge ahead with anything that you are doing, and you will probably do it in the company of friends or representatives from the
Department for Work and Pensions. If there is anyone special in your life, Friday could be a significant day as the restraining order is due to expire.

Lucky muscle:
Triceps

Lucky plant:
Chemical

L
IBRA

One problem common to many people with Libra strong in their chart is a tendency to put off till tomorrow what they know they really ought to do today. Wednesday is no
exception to this when you are close to completing a particularly challenging jigsaw and the chip-pan catches fire. It is probably best to leave finding the horse’s head from
Constable’s
The Hay Wain
until after the fire is out.

Lucky precaution:
Damp tea towel

Lucky guess:
Still in the box

S
CORPIO

You can work towards your goals with some success this week. Family and friends are more important to you than you let on, but just now you need to be careful, because those
around you are likely to be irritable and easily upset by your late-night ‘one-man-band’ practice sessions. On Thursday, you will be accidentally run over by an unmanned motorised
wheelchair.

Lucky paper-size:
Quarto

Lucky mug:
Enamel

S
AGITTARIUS

You have a number of obligations at the moment involving your work and your immediate finances. You tend to keep a cool head and on the whole manage everything very
efficiently. But be careful not to neglect your home and your relationships, as Mars rising indicates that all of your family, friends and colleagues are seriously considering emigration.

Lucky pasta:
Linguini

Lucky sauce:
Carbonara

C
APRICORN

Money matters are to the fore this week. Your recent economy drive has not left everyone as happy as they might be. On Thursday, the damp patch in the hall gets so bad that
there is a permanent rainbow when the light is on. In an attempt to dry it out, you borrow an old paraffin heater that manages to transform the cold damp hall into a cold, damp hall filled with
paraffin fumes.

Lucky shout:
Exasperation

Lucky throw:
Over the garden fence

A
QUARIUS

Your diet has not been quite as healthy as it should have been of late. The forthcoming festivities are unlikely to improve the situation. You are already known as something of
a ‘nutritional over-achiever’ and the buttons on your shirts have now started to resemble a burst sausage. There is good news around the corner. A carelessly defrosted turkey will give
you typhoid and you will lose forty pounds in hospital.

Lucky convulsion:
Dry heaves

Lucky state:
Febrile

P
ISCES

With Jupiter travelling through Aries you can expect a hilarious incident with a tin of gloss-paint at the cinema that changes your fortunes by mid-week. On Thursday, Moira
Stewart breaks into your house and hides nectarines behind the cushions. Your need for freedom will come to a head on Saturday when, on a whim, you will find yourself buying a one-way plane ticket
to Trondheim.

Lucky approach:
Westerly

Lucky sea-area:
German Bight

A
RIES

As a Fire sign, you are normally quite at home with all aspects of cooking, but icy Neptune transits the area of your chart concerned with food preparation and casts doubt over
the advice you have been given for defrosting the turkey. It will normally be properly defrosted in two days, rather than what you have been told: ‘When it has cobwebs in it’.

Lucky stuffing:
Apple and thyme

Lucky medication:
Imodium

T
AURUS

This week will be great on the whole for getting group projects off the ground. You may find that people in your community are looking to you to do something for the general
good. You may gain considerable local support for a ‘Torch ‘n’ Pitchfork’ march to the offices of the Borough Council, but they will be closed for the Christmas Holiday and
the few people you do get interested will be waylaid by Carol singers.

Lucky coat:
Duffle

Lucky mittens:
On strings

G
EMINI

This is not a week to rush into things. That isn’t so easy for Gemini, for no sooner have you got an idea than you are rushing to put it into action. The one about
dressing up as a dolphin and covering yourself with greengage jelly during the office party was not a particularly good one and you can expect to be carpeted by the end of the week. The good news
is that the carpet is an antique Persian rug so the burns are minor.

Lucky herb:
Miller

Lucky grass:
Fescue

C
ANCER